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Start Working to Give Yourself What You Really Want

Key Lesson: Nothing we spend our lives struggling to take from this world has the power to grant us the one thing we long to possess above all else: our own true nature.

Let Love Be Your Life

What is immortal? It isn't a person's face or a passage of music. It is not the things themselves, but it is that which produces those things. It is the actual genesis of God's love. We don't have to look for this love. It's the very core of us. But until we give our lives to the awareness of this never-ending genesis of love taking place within us, we have only facsimiles of love. We don't have that which is true and real.

We want in our heart of hearts to have something that is eternal. We touch something within ourselves -- through each other -- that introduces us to a love that we know is true and even eternal. But then the object that produces this sense of ourselves changes. When it changes, we lose not only the sense of ourselves that we were so in love with, but now we're introduced to a whole series of feelings that we don't want at all, and so we turn on the one we loved.

We cannot know the whole of ourselves if we refuse parts of us because they are distasteful or inconvenient. We cannot know the genesis of love within ourselves, its activity and its fruits, if everything about us is always looking out and saying, "I don't want anything but pleasure, and anything that produces a disturbance inside of me, I'm going to keep away from me."

If we want a whole life, we must be whole human beings. A whole human being doesn't try to figure out why he or she feels what they do. A whole human being is what they are. We are not educated properly about what it means to be what we are, because we're filled with nonsensical ideas that who we are is a loving image proffered us by some ideology or icon that says, "This is what a loving person is."

We push away the genesis of love that is required for us to discover that which is immortal -- that which isn't afraid of what we're afraid of, that has no agenda concerning what anyone else is or does, or what they produce inside of us. Why? Because that love has its own life that isn't conditional, and it is never-endingly producing a new beginning.

Newness and love are immortal, without time, and you and I are given something by God that can participate in that -- not try to own it, not try to change the conditions that allow it, but to see that all such attempts to power our way through whatever it is, so we can keep something, has been for nothing. All of it has led us to a moment where life has shown us certain things, and when it shows us, we say, "I don't want to see it. I don't want to deal with that emptiness. I don't want to deal with that loneliness. I don't want to deal with that anger."

And so the heart is walled off from love, believing that it's actually keeping love in place, when all it's keeping in place is enmity. All it's keeping in place is something breeding inside of us that is ultimately going to destroy that which we were trying to keep anyway. We all know that. Love is meant to be a modifying, active, beautiful force in our lives -- not something we try to grab and apply in order to acquire something, but so that the whole of us is aware of it this very moment.

It is possible to never again worry how things will turn out, or anxiously wonder if someone "likes" us. It is possible to enter into a loving relationship with what is eternal. Then we are not searching for anything outside of ourselves anymore. We have at last become that for which we were searching.

Let me give you a way in which you can start to work toward possessing the true nature that we all long for. Any time you can be aware of yourself, in that instant, no matter what it is that you're being shown, you are being asked not to do anything with what you've been shown other than to let yourself see it fully. Let this awareness that God has given you come into what it is that is present inside of you. Why? So that it can do its genesis. So that change can take place.

Do you know that most of what disturbs us in our lives, we actually had a hand in creating through resistance (to some unwanted moment)... so that this unwanted state got "stopped" up in us? To see that is the beginning of releasing the nature that is consistently trying to control its environment as well as the people in it, and to begin the beautiful work of realizing that there's nothing that you're going to see, there's nothing that's going to pass in front of you, that isn't there for the purpose of introducing you to what you have yet to discover is true about yourself. So that eventually you will want the perpetual truth of yourself, which is what the genesis is consistently showing you -- not "you" the way you take yourself to be, but rather a completely different order of yourself that is never not being made in the image of love.

This article is excerpted from The Genesis of Love ("Relationship Magic: Finding Heaven on Earth").

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Querying SQL: SELECT `t`.`TaxonomyLookupID` AS `t0_c0`, `t`.`TaxonomyID` AS
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`Product`.`TableOfContents` AS `t1_c20`, `Product`.`Footer` AS `t1_c21`,
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01:57:00.558752 trace system.db.ar.CActiveRecord
lazy loading Product.productFormat
01:57:00.561103 trace system.db.CDbCommand
Querying SQL: SHOW COLUMNS FROM `ProductFormat`
01:57:00.564347 trace system.db.CDbCommand
Querying SQL: SHOW CREATE TABLE `ProductFormat`
01:57:00.566051 trace system.db.CDbCommand
Querying SQL: SELECT `productFormat`.`ProductFormatID` AS `t1_c0`,
`productFormat`.`Description` AS `t1_c1`,
`productFormat`.`PluralDescription` AS `t1_c2`, `productFormat`.`Active` AS
`t1_c3` FROM `ProductFormat` `productFormat` WHERE
(`productFormat`.`ProductFormatID`=:ypl0)
01:57:00.567801 trace system.db.ar.CActiveRecord
lazy loading Product.productFormat
01:57:00.568279 trace system.db.CDbCommand
Querying SQL: SELECT `productFormat`.`ProductFormatID` AS `t1_c0`,
`productFormat`.`Description` AS `t1_c1`,
`productFormat`.`PluralDescription` AS `t1_c2`, `productFormat`.`Active` AS
`t1_c3` FROM `ProductFormat` `productFormat` WHERE
(`productFormat`.`ProductFormatID`=:ypl0)
01:57:00.569900 trace system.db.ar.CActiveRecord
lazy loading Product.productFormat
01:57:00.570333 trace system.db.CDbCommand
Querying SQL: SELECT `productFormat`.`ProductFormatID` AS `t1_c0`,
`productFormat`.`Description` AS `t1_c1`,
`productFormat`.`PluralDescription` AS `t1_c2`, `productFormat`.`Active` AS
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(`productFormat`.`ProductFormatID`=:ypl0)
01:57:00.572104 trace system.db.ar.CActiveRecord
lazy loading Product.productFormat
01:57:00.572499 trace system.db.CDbCommand
Querying SQL: SELECT `productFormat`.`ProductFormatID` AS `t1_c0`,
`productFormat`.`Description` AS `t1_c1`,
`productFormat`.`PluralDescription` AS `t1_c2`, `productFormat`.`Active` AS
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(`productFormat`.`ProductFormatID`=:ypl0)
01:57:00.574135 trace system.db.ar.CActiveRecord
lazy loading Product.productFormat
01:57:00.574532 trace system.db.CDbCommand
Querying SQL: SELECT `productFormat`.`ProductFormatID` AS `t1_c0`,
`productFormat`.`Description` AS `t1_c1`,
`productFormat`.`PluralDescription` AS `t1_c2`, `productFormat`.`Active` AS
`t1_c3` FROM `ProductFormat` `productFormat` WHERE
(`productFormat`.`ProductFormatID`=:ypl0)
01:57:00.576225 trace system.db.ar.CActiveRecord
lazy loading Product.productFormat
01:57:00.576632 trace system.db.CDbCommand
Querying SQL: SELECT `productFormat`.`ProductFormatID` AS `t1_c0`,
`productFormat`.`Description` AS `t1_c1`,
`productFormat`.`PluralDescription` AS `t1_c2`, `productFormat`.`Active` AS
`t1_c3` FROM `ProductFormat` `productFormat` WHERE
(`productFormat`.`ProductFormatID`=:ypl0)
01:57:00.578227 trace system.db.ar.CActiveRecord
lazy loading Product.productFormat
01:57:00.578773 trace system.db.CDbCommand
Querying SQL: SELECT `productFormat`.`ProductFormatID` AS `t1_c0`,
`productFormat`.`Description` AS `t1_c1`,
`productFormat`.`PluralDescription` AS `t1_c2`, `productFormat`.`Active` AS
`t1_c3` FROM `ProductFormat` `productFormat` WHERE
(`productFormat`.`ProductFormatID`=:ypl0)
01:57:00.580144 trace system.db.ar.CActiveRecord
lazy loading Product.productFormat
01:57:00.580507 trace system.db.CDbCommand
Querying SQL: SELECT `productFormat`.`ProductFormatID` AS `t1_c0`,
`productFormat`.`Description` AS `t1_c1`,
`productFormat`.`PluralDescription` AS `t1_c2`, `productFormat`.`Active` AS
`t1_c3` FROM `ProductFormat` `productFormat` WHERE
(`productFormat`.`ProductFormatID`=:ypl0)
01:57:00.582274 trace system.db.ar.CActiveRecord
lazy loading Product.productFormat
01:57:00.582875 trace system.db.CDbCommand
Querying SQL: SELECT `productFormat`.`ProductFormatID` AS `t1_c0`,
`productFormat`.`Description` AS `t1_c1`,
`productFormat`.`PluralDescription` AS `t1_c2`, `productFormat`.`Active` AS
`t1_c3` FROM `ProductFormat` `productFormat` WHERE
(`productFormat`.`ProductFormatID`=:ypl0)
01:57:00.584702 trace system.db.ar.CActiveRecord
lazy loading Product.productFormat
01:57:00.585351 trace system.db.CDbCommand
Querying SQL: SELECT `productFormat`.`ProductFormatID` AS `t1_c0`,
`productFormat`.`Description` AS `t1_c1`,
`productFormat`.`PluralDescription` AS `t1_c2`, `productFormat`.`Active` AS
`t1_c3` FROM `ProductFormat` `productFormat` WHERE
(`productFormat`.`ProductFormatID`=:ypl0)
01:57:00.586925 trace system.db.ar.CActiveRecord
lazy loading Product.productFormat
01:57:00.587294 trace system.db.CDbCommand
Querying SQL: SELECT `productFormat`.`ProductFormatID` AS `t1_c0`,
`productFormat`.`Description` AS `t1_c1`,
`productFormat`.`PluralDescription` AS `t1_c2`, `productFormat`.`Active` AS
`t1_c3` FROM `ProductFormat` `productFormat` WHERE
(`productFormat`.`ProductFormatID`=:ypl0)
01:57:00.588852 trace system.db.ar.CActiveRecord
lazy loading Product.productFormat
01:57:00.589385 trace system.db.CDbCommand
Querying SQL: SELECT `productFormat`.`ProductFormatID` AS `t1_c0`,
`productFormat`.`Description` AS `t1_c1`,
`productFormat`.`PluralDescription` AS `t1_c2`, `productFormat`.`Active` AS
`t1_c3` FROM `ProductFormat` `productFormat` WHERE
(`productFormat`.`ProductFormatID`=:ypl0)
01:57:00.590784 trace system.db.ar.CActiveRecord
lazy loading Product.productFormat
01:57:00.591238 trace system.db.CDbCommand
Querying SQL: SELECT `productFormat`.`ProductFormatID` AS `t1_c0`,
`productFormat`.`Description` AS `t1_c1`,
`productFormat`.`PluralDescription` AS `t1_c2`, `productFormat`.`Active` AS
`t1_c3` FROM `ProductFormat` `productFormat` WHERE
(`productFormat`.`ProductFormatID`=:ypl0)
01:57:00.592816 trace system.db.ar.CActiveRecord
lazy loading Product.productFormat
01:57:00.593233 trace system.db.CDbCommand
Querying SQL: SELECT `productFormat`.`ProductFormatID` AS `t1_c0`,
`productFormat`.`Description` AS `t1_c1`,
`productFormat`.`PluralDescription` AS `t1_c2`, `productFormat`.`Active` AS
`t1_c3` FROM `ProductFormat` `productFormat` WHERE
(`productFormat`.`ProductFormatID`=:ypl0)
01:57:00.594647 trace system.db.ar.CActiveRecord
lazy loading Product.productFormat
01:57:00.595432 trace system.db.CDbCommand
Querying SQL: SELECT `productFormat`.`ProductFormatID` AS `t1_c0`,
`productFormat`.`Description` AS `t1_c1`,
`productFormat`.`PluralDescription` AS `t1_c2`, `productFormat`.`Active` AS
`t1_c3` FROM `ProductFormat` `productFormat` WHERE
(`productFormat`.`ProductFormatID`=:ypl0)
01:57:00.597178 trace system.db.ar.CActiveRecord
lazy loading Product.productFormat
01:57:00.597757 trace system.db.CDbCommand
Querying SQL: SELECT `productFormat`.`ProductFormatID` AS `t1_c0`,
`productFormat`.`Description` AS `t1_c1`,
`productFormat`.`PluralDescription` AS `t1_c2`, `productFormat`.`Active` AS
`t1_c3` FROM `ProductFormat` `productFormat` WHERE
(`productFormat`.`ProductFormatID`=:ypl0)
01:57:00.599133 trace system.db.ar.CActiveRecord
lazy loading Product.productFormat
01:57:00.599488 trace system.db.CDbCommand
Querying SQL: SELECT `productFormat`.`ProductFormatID` AS `t1_c0`,
`productFormat`.`Description` AS `t1_c1`,
`productFormat`.`PluralDescription` AS `t1_c2`, `productFormat`.`Active` AS
`t1_c3` FROM `ProductFormat` `productFormat` WHERE
(`productFormat`.`ProductFormatID`=:ypl0)
01:57:00.600862 trace system.db.ar.CActiveRecord
lazy loading Product.productFormat
01:57:00.601214 trace system.db.CDbCommand
Querying SQL: SELECT `productFormat`.`ProductFormatID` AS `t1_c0`,
`productFormat`.`Description` AS `t1_c1`,
`productFormat`.`PluralDescription` AS `t1_c2`, `productFormat`.`Active` AS
`t1_c3` FROM `ProductFormat` `productFormat` WHERE
(`productFormat`.`ProductFormatID`=:ypl0)
01:57:00.603060 trace system.db.ar.CActiveRecord
lazy loading Product.productFormat
01:57:00.603744 trace system.db.CDbCommand
Querying SQL: SELECT `productFormat`.`ProductFormatID` AS `t1_c0`,
`productFormat`.`Description` AS `t1_c1`,
`productFormat`.`PluralDescription` AS `t1_c2`, `productFormat`.`Active` AS
`t1_c3` FROM `ProductFormat` `productFormat` WHERE
(`productFormat`.`ProductFormatID`=:ypl0)
01:57:00.605181 trace system.db.ar.CActiveRecord
lazy loading Product.productFormat
01:57:00.605555 trace system.db.CDbCommand
Querying SQL: SELECT `productFormat`.`ProductFormatID` AS `t1_c0`,
`productFormat`.`Description` AS `t1_c1`,
`productFormat`.`PluralDescription` AS `t1_c2`, `productFormat`.`Active` AS
`t1_c3` FROM `ProductFormat` `productFormat` WHERE
(`productFormat`.`ProductFormatID`=:ypl0)
01:57:00.607073 trace system.db.ar.CActiveRecord
lazy loading Product.productFormat
01:57:00.607412 trace system.db.CDbCommand
Querying SQL: SELECT `productFormat`.`ProductFormatID` AS `t1_c0`,
`productFormat`.`Description` AS `t1_c1`,
`productFormat`.`PluralDescription` AS `t1_c2`, `productFormat`.`Active` AS
`t1_c3` FROM `ProductFormat` `productFormat` WHERE
(`productFormat`.`ProductFormatID`=:ypl0)
01:57:00.608949 trace system.db.ar.CActiveRecord
lazy loading Product.productFormat
01:57:00.609319 trace system.db.CDbCommand
Querying SQL: SELECT `productFormat`.`ProductFormatID` AS `t1_c0`,
`productFormat`.`Description` AS `t1_c1`,
`productFormat`.`PluralDescription` AS `t1_c2`, `productFormat`.`Active` AS
`t1_c3` FROM `ProductFormat` `productFormat` WHERE
(`productFormat`.`ProductFormatID`=:ypl0)
01:57:00.610735 trace system.db.ar.CActiveRecord
lazy loading Product.productFormat
01:57:00.611087 trace system.db.CDbCommand
Querying SQL: SELECT `productFormat`.`ProductFormatID` AS `t1_c0`,
`productFormat`.`Description` AS `t1_c1`,
`productFormat`.`PluralDescription` AS `t1_c2`, `productFormat`.`Active` AS
`t1_c3` FROM `ProductFormat` `productFormat` WHERE
(`productFormat`.`ProductFormatID`=:ypl0)
01:57:00.612624 trace system.db.ar.CActiveRecord
lazy loading Product.productFormat
01:57:00.612961 trace system.db.CDbCommand
Querying SQL: SELECT `productFormat`.`ProductFormatID` AS `t1_c0`,
`productFormat`.`Description` AS `t1_c1`,
`productFormat`.`PluralDescription` AS `t1_c2`, `productFormat`.`Active` AS
`t1_c3` FROM `ProductFormat` `productFormat` WHERE
(`productFormat`.`ProductFormatID`=:ypl0)
01:57:00.614445 trace system.db.ar.CActiveRecord
lazy loading Product.productFormat
01:57:00.614793 trace system.db.CDbCommand
Querying SQL: SELECT `productFormat`.`ProductFormatID` AS `t1_c0`,
`productFormat`.`Description` AS `t1_c1`,
`productFormat`.`PluralDescription` AS `t1_c2`, `productFormat`.`Active` AS
`t1_c3` FROM `ProductFormat` `productFormat` WHERE
(`productFormat`.`ProductFormatID`=:ypl0)
01:57:00.616312 trace system.db.ar.CActiveRecord
lazy loading Product.productFormat
01:57:00.616852 trace system.db.CDbCommand
Querying SQL: SELECT `productFormat`.`ProductFormatID` AS `t1_c0`,
`productFormat`.`Description` AS `t1_c1`,
`productFormat`.`PluralDescription` AS `t1_c2`, `productFormat`.`Active` AS
`t1_c3` FROM `ProductFormat` `productFormat` WHERE
(`productFormat`.`ProductFormatID`=:ypl0)
01:57:00.618498 trace system.db.ar.CActiveRecord
lazy loading Product.productFormat
01:57:00.619010 trace system.db.CDbCommand
Querying SQL: SELECT `productFormat`.`ProductFormatID` AS `t1_c0`,
`productFormat`.`Description` AS `t1_c1`,
`productFormat`.`PluralDescription` AS `t1_c2`, `productFormat`.`Active` AS
`t1_c3` FROM `ProductFormat` `productFormat` WHERE
(`productFormat`.`ProductFormatID`=:ypl0)
01:57:00.620584 trace system.db.ar.CActiveRecord
lazy loading Product.productFormat
01:57:00.621027 trace system.db.CDbCommand
Querying SQL: SELECT `productFormat`.`ProductFormatID` AS `t1_c0`,
`productFormat`.`Description` AS `t1_c1`,
`productFormat`.`PluralDescription` AS `t1_c2`, `productFormat`.`Active` AS
`t1_c3` FROM `ProductFormat` `productFormat` WHERE
(`productFormat`.`ProductFormatID`=:ypl0)
01:57:00.622586 trace system.db.ar.CActiveRecord
lazy loading Product.productFormat
01:57:00.622966 trace system.db.CDbCommand
Querying SQL: SELECT `productFormat`.`ProductFormatID` AS `t1_c0`,
`productFormat`.`Description` AS `t1_c1`,
`productFormat`.`PluralDescription` AS `t1_c2`, `productFormat`.`Active` AS
`t1_c3` FROM `ProductFormat` `productFormat` WHERE
(`productFormat`.`ProductFormatID`=:ypl0)
01:57:00.624377 trace system.db.ar.CActiveRecord
lazy loading Product.productFormat
01:57:00.624712 trace system.db.CDbCommand
Querying SQL: SELECT `productFormat`.`ProductFormatID` AS `t1_c0`,
`productFormat`.`Description` AS `t1_c1`,
`productFormat`.`PluralDescription` AS `t1_c2`, `productFormat`.`Active` AS
`t1_c3` FROM `ProductFormat` `productFormat` WHERE
(`productFormat`.`ProductFormatID`=:ypl0)
01:57:00.626136 trace system.db.ar.CActiveRecord
lazy loading Product.productFormat
01:57:00.626441 trace system.db.CDbCommand
Querying SQL: SELECT `productFormat`.`ProductFormatID` AS `t1_c0`,
`productFormat`.`Description` AS `t1_c1`,
`productFormat`.`PluralDescription` AS `t1_c2`, `productFormat`.`Active` AS
`t1_c3` FROM `ProductFormat` `productFormat` WHERE
(`productFormat`.`ProductFormatID`=:ypl0)
01:57:00.627870 trace system.db.ar.CActiveRecord
lazy loading Product.productFormat
01:57:00.628175 trace system.db.CDbCommand
Querying SQL: SELECT `productFormat`.`ProductFormatID` AS `t1_c0`,
`productFormat`.`Description` AS `t1_c1`,
`productFormat`.`PluralDescription` AS `t1_c2`, `productFormat`.`Active` AS
`t1_c3` FROM `ProductFormat` `productFormat` WHERE
(`productFormat`.`ProductFormatID`=:ypl0)
01:57:00.629700 trace system.db.ar.CActiveRecord
lazy loading Product.productFormat
01:57:00.630006 trace system.db.CDbCommand
Querying SQL: SELECT `productFormat`.`ProductFormatID` AS `t1_c0`,
`productFormat`.`Description` AS `t1_c1`,
`productFormat`.`PluralDescription` AS `t1_c2`, `productFormat`.`Active` AS
`t1_c3` FROM `ProductFormat` `productFormat` WHERE
(`productFormat`.`ProductFormatID`=:ypl0)
01:57:00.631491 trace system.db.ar.CActiveRecord
lazy loading Product.productFormat
01:57:00.631820 trace system.db.CDbCommand
Querying SQL: SELECT `productFormat`.`ProductFormatID` AS `t1_c0`,
`productFormat`.`Description` AS `t1_c1`,
`productFormat`.`PluralDescription` AS `t1_c2`, `productFormat`.`Active` AS
`t1_c3` FROM `ProductFormat` `productFormat` WHERE
(`productFormat`.`ProductFormatID`=:ypl0)
01:57:00.633254 trace system.db.ar.CActiveRecord
lazy loading Product.productFormat
01:57:00.633915 trace system.db.CDbCommand
Querying SQL: SELECT `productFormat`.`ProductFormatID` AS `t1_c0`,
`productFormat`.`Description` AS `t1_c1`,
`productFormat`.`PluralDescription` AS `t1_c2`, `productFormat`.`Active` AS
`t1_c3` FROM `ProductFormat` `productFormat` WHERE
(`productFormat`.`ProductFormatID`=:ypl0)
01:57:00.637439 trace system.db.ar.CActiveRecord
lazy loading Product.productFormat
01:57:00.637840 trace system.db.CDbCommand
Querying SQL: SELECT `productFormat`.`ProductFormatID` AS `t1_c0`,
`productFormat`.`Description` AS `t1_c1`,
`productFormat`.`PluralDescription` AS `t1_c2`, `productFormat`.`Active` AS
`t1_c3` FROM `ProductFormat` `productFormat` WHERE
(`productFormat`.`ProductFormatID`=:ypl0)
01:57:00.639286 trace system.db.ar.CActiveRecord
lazy loading Product.productFormat
01:57:00.639668 trace system.db.CDbCommand
Querying SQL: SELECT `productFormat`.`ProductFormatID` AS `t1_c0`,
`productFormat`.`Description` AS `t1_c1`,
`productFormat`.`PluralDescription` AS `t1_c2`, `productFormat`.`Active` AS
`t1_c3` FROM `ProductFormat` `productFormat` WHERE
(`productFormat`.`ProductFormatID`=:ypl0)
01:57:00.641134 trace system.db.ar.CActiveRecord
lazy loading Product.productFormat
01:57:00.641676 trace system.db.CDbCommand
Querying SQL: SELECT `productFormat`.`ProductFormatID` AS `t1_c0`,
`productFormat`.`Description` AS `t1_c1`,
`productFormat`.`PluralDescription` AS `t1_c2`, `productFormat`.`Active` AS
`t1_c3` FROM `ProductFormat` `productFormat` WHERE
(`productFormat`.`ProductFormatID`=:ypl0)
01:57:00.643116 trace system.db.ar.CActiveRecord
lazy loading Product.productFormat
01:57:00.643577 trace system.db.CDbCommand
Querying SQL: SELECT `productFormat`.`ProductFormatID` AS `t1_c0`,
`productFormat`.`Description` AS `t1_c1`,
`productFormat`.`PluralDescription` AS `t1_c2`, `productFormat`.`Active` AS
`t1_c3` FROM `ProductFormat` `productFormat` WHERE
(`productFormat`.`ProductFormatID`=:ypl0)
01:57:00.644850 trace system.db.ar.CActiveRecord
lazy loading Product.productFormat
01:57:00.645224 trace system.db.CDbCommand
Querying SQL: SELECT `productFormat`.`ProductFormatID` AS `t1_c0`,
`productFormat`.`Description` AS `t1_c1`,
`productFormat`.`PluralDescription` AS `t1_c2`, `productFormat`.`Active` AS
`t1_c3` FROM `ProductFormat` `productFormat` WHERE
(`productFormat`.`ProductFormatID`=:ypl0)
01:57:00.646738 trace system.db.ar.CActiveRecord
lazy loading Product.productFormat
01:57:00.647090 trace system.db.CDbCommand
Querying SQL: SELECT `productFormat`.`ProductFormatID` AS `t1_c0`,
`productFormat`.`Description` AS `t1_c1`,
`productFormat`.`PluralDescription` AS `t1_c2`, `productFormat`.`Active` AS
`t1_c3` FROM `ProductFormat` `productFormat` WHERE
(`productFormat`.`ProductFormatID`=:ypl0)
01:57:00.648610 trace system.db.ar.CActiveRecord
lazy loading Product.productFormat
01:57:00.648952 trace system.db.CDbCommand
Querying SQL: SELECT `productFormat`.`ProductFormatID` AS `t1_c0`,
`productFormat`.`Description` AS `t1_c1`,
`productFormat`.`PluralDescription` AS `t1_c2`, `productFormat`.`Active` AS
`t1_c3` FROM `ProductFormat` `productFormat` WHERE
(`productFormat`.`ProductFormatID`=:ypl0)
01:57:00.650425 trace system.db.ar.CActiveRecord
lazy loading Product.productFormat
01:57:00.650922 trace system.db.CDbCommand
Querying SQL: SELECT `productFormat`.`ProductFormatID` AS `t1_c0`,
`productFormat`.`Description` AS `t1_c1`,
`productFormat`.`PluralDescription` AS `t1_c2`, `productFormat`.`Active` AS
`t1_c3` FROM `ProductFormat` `productFormat` WHERE
(`productFormat`.`ProductFormatID`=:ypl0)
01:57:00.652463 trace system.db.ar.CActiveRecord
lazy loading Product.productFormat
01:57:00.652879 trace system.db.CDbCommand
Querying SQL: SELECT `productFormat`.`ProductFormatID` AS `t1_c0`,
`productFormat`.`Description` AS `t1_c1`,
`productFormat`.`PluralDescription` AS `t1_c2`, `productFormat`.`Active` AS
`t1_c3` FROM `ProductFormat` `productFormat` WHERE
(`productFormat`.`ProductFormatID`=:ypl0)
01:57:00.654434 trace system.db.ar.CActiveRecord
lazy loading Product.productFormat
01:57:00.654845 trace system.db.CDbCommand
Querying SQL: SELECT `productFormat`.`ProductFormatID` AS `t1_c0`,
`productFormat`.`Description` AS `t1_c1`,
`productFormat`.`PluralDescription` AS `t1_c2`, `productFormat`.`Active` AS
`t1_c3` FROM `ProductFormat` `productFormat` WHERE
(`productFormat`.`ProductFormatID`=:ypl0)
01:57:00.656240 trace system.db.ar.CActiveRecord
lazy loading Product.productFormat
01:57:00.656651 trace system.db.CDbCommand
Querying SQL: SELECT `productFormat`.`ProductFormatID` AS `t1_c0`,
`productFormat`.`Description` AS `t1_c1`,
`productFormat`.`PluralDescription` AS `t1_c2`, `productFormat`.`Active` AS
`t1_c3` FROM `ProductFormat` `productFormat` WHERE
(`productFormat`.`ProductFormatID`=:ypl0)
01:57:00.658416 trace system.db.ar.CActiveRecord
lazy loading Product.productFormat
01:57:00.658827 trace system.db.CDbCommand
Querying SQL: SELECT `productFormat`.`ProductFormatID` AS `t1_c0`,
`productFormat`.`Description` AS `t1_c1`,
`productFormat`.`PluralDescription` AS `t1_c2`, `productFormat`.`Active` AS
`t1_c3` FROM `ProductFormat` `productFormat` WHERE
(`productFormat`.`ProductFormatID`=:ypl0)
01:57:00.660871 trace system.db.ar.CActiveRecord
TaxonomyLookup.findAll()
01:57:00.661043 trace system.db.CDbCommand
Querying SQL: SELECT * FROM `TaxonomyLookup` `t` WHERE TaxonomyID = 175 AND
TaxonomyItemTypeID = 1
01:57:00.663152 trace system.db.ar.CActiveRecord
Content.findAll()
01:57:00.663270 trace system.db.CDbCommand
Querying SQL: SELECT * FROM `Content` `t` WHERE ContentTypeID = 16  
								AND Active = 1 
								AND VisibilityTypeID = 2 
								AND (ExpirationTimestamp IS NULL OR ExpirationTimestamp >=
1398405420)
								AND ContentID IN
(2591,3922,4144,4214,4263,4516,4517,4632,4658,4739,4850,5087,5088,5219,5224,5226,5289)
ORDER BY ExpirationTimestamp ASC 
01:57:00.666521 trace system.db.ar.CActiveRecord
TaxonomyLookup.findAll()
01:57:00.666585 trace system.db.CDbCommand
Querying SQL: SELECT * FROM `TaxonomyLookup` `t` WHERE TaxonomyID = 176 AND
TaxonomyItemTypeID = 1
01:57:00.668011 trace system.db.ar.CActiveRecord
Content.findAll()
01:57:00.668076 trace system.db.CDbCommand
Querying SQL: SELECT * FROM `Content` `t` WHERE ContentTypeID = 16  
								AND Active = 1 
								AND VisibilityTypeID = 2 
								AND (ExpirationTimestamp IS NULL OR ExpirationTimestamp >=
1398405420)
								AND ContentID IN (2591,4090,4142,4188,4656,4657,4956) ORDER BY
ExpirationTimestamp ASC 
01:57:00.670468 trace system.db.ar.CActiveRecord
TaxonomyLookup.findAll()
01:57:00.670533 trace system.db.CDbCommand
Querying SQL: SELECT * FROM `TaxonomyLookup` `t` WHERE TaxonomyItemTypeId =
1 AND TaxonomyID IN (29,77,101,102)
01:57:00.687071 trace system.db.ar.CActiveRecord
TaxonomyLookup.findAll() eagerly
01:57:00.687397 trace system.db.CDbCommand
Querying SQL: SELECT `t`.`TaxonomyLookupID` AS `t0_c0`, `t`.`TaxonomyID` AS
`t0_c1`, `t`.`ItemID` AS `t0_c2`, `t`.`TaxonomyItemTypeID` AS `t0_c3`,
`Content`.`ContentID` AS `t1_c0`, `Content`.`ParentID` AS `t1_c1`,
`Content`.`ContentTypeID` AS `t1_c2`, `Content`.`Title` AS `t1_c3`,
`Content`.`Body` AS `t1_c4`, `Content`.`CustomHtml1` AS `t1_c5`,
`Content`.`CustomHtml2` AS `t1_c6`, `Content`.`Source` AS `t1_c7`,
`Content`.`Url` AS `t1_c8`, `Content`.`MediaSize` AS `t1_c9`,
`Content`.`Keywords` AS `t1_c10`, `Content`.`Description` AS `t1_c11`,
`Content`.`DateStamp` AS `t1_c12`, `Content`.`CopyrightDate` AS `t1_c13`,
`Content`.`ExpirationDate` AS `t1_c14`, `Content`.`SortOrder` AS `t1_c15`,
`Content`.`Active` AS `t1_c16`, `Content`.`AudioFormatID` AS `t1_c17`,
`Content`.`SubTitle` AS `t1_c18`, `Content`.`VisibilityTypeID` AS `t1_c19`,
`Content`.`AdminComments` AS `t1_c20`, `Content`.`AdminAlertTimestamp` AS
`t1_c21`, `Content`.`FeatureInCategory` AS `t1_c22`,
`Content`.`FeatureInCategoryExpireTimestamp` AS `t1_c23`,
`Content`.`FeatureInSite` AS `t1_c24`,
`Content`.`FeatureInSiteExpireTimestamp` AS `t1_c25`,
`Content`.`ActivateTimestamp` AS `t1_c26`, `Content`.`SEOURLString` AS
`t1_c27`, `Content`.`SummaryDescription` AS `t1_c28`, `Content`.`TakeAways`
AS `t1_c29`, `Content`.`EditorsTopPick` AS `t1_c30`,
`Content`.`DateDetails` AS `t1_c31`, `Content`.`TimeDetails` AS `t1_c32`,
`Content`.`LocationDetails` AS `t1_c33`, `Content`.`PlaybackLength` AS
`t1_c34`, `Content`.`ItemWidth` AS `t1_c35`, `Content`.`ItemHeight` AS
`t1_c36`, `Content`.`Heading` AS `t1_c37`, `Content`.`CopyrightTimestamp`
AS `t1_c38`, `Content`.`ExpirationTimestamp` AS `t1_c39`,
`Content`.`DateCreatedTimestamp` AS `t1_c40`, `Content`.`Transcription` AS
`t1_c41`, `Content`.`LastModifiedTimestamp` AS `t1_c42` FROM
`TaxonomyLookup` `t`  LEFT OUTER JOIN `Content` `Content` ON
(`t`.`ItemID`=`Content`.`ContentID`) WHERE (TaxonomyID = 172 AND
TaxonomyItemTypeId = 1 AND ItemID IN
(8,14,15,22,38,54,201,243,304,602,1304,1377,1421,1629,1729,1850,1857,1909,2015,2052,2195,2206,2274,2283,2362,2445,2497,2532,2561,2681,2725,2791,2875,2988,2991,3282,3346,3375,3400,3647,3686,3779,3911,3965,3968,4050,4082,4137,4272,4335,4343,4373,4375,4555,4642,4663,4697,4879,4993,4997,5001,5126,54,59,160,201,558,1189,1421,1516,1558,1892,1919,2046,2052,2174,2283,2300,2356,2388,2526,2593,2600,2641,3019,3059,3156,3161,3172,3181,3211,3265,3271,3282,3286,3298,3315,3348,3418,3429,3569,3583,3611,3613,3624,3645,3774,3843,3887,3911,3947,3995,3999,4063,4069,4082,4089,4121,4129,4137,4187,4199,4223,4297,4351,4364,4373,4418,4437,4442,4490,4511,4568,4609,4653,4668,4739,4765,4835,4890,4938,4977,4984,4993,5018,5087,5123,5136,5297,16,19,23,36,46,139,146,192,201,219,238,275,281,294,331,454,473,519,534,595,1188,1276,1311,1313,1366,1413,1439,1481,1486,1539,1564,1683,1690,1741,1765,1828,1857,1929,1933,1966,1988,2134,2274,2344,2349,2393,2428,2433,2435,2610,2616,2628,2641,2714,2828,2839,2879,2984,2998,3028,3055,3265,3282,3526,3530,3674,3730,3779,3881,3992,4018,4030,4206,4285,4360,4493,4584,4601,4643,4705,4711,4809,4831,4878,4884,4971,4985,5020,5029,5067,5083,5173,5176,5189,5266,5301,47,176,211,344,364,503,1194,1325,1351,1464,1533,1554,1558,1670,1841,1976,1998,2237,2303,2366,2419,2428,2471,2507,2522,2532,2539,2562,2572,2725,2745,2796,3203,3226,3282,3348,3589,3625,3887,3966,3977,3999,4105,4186,4213,4291,4406,4423,4455,4720,4724,4786,4881,4922,4954,5126,5287,5314)
AND ItemID <> 3282) AND (Content.Active = 1) ORDER BY
Content.DateCreatedTimestamp DESC
01:57:00.714564 trace system.db.CDbCommand
Querying SQL: SHOW COLUMNS FROM `section`
01:57:00.717032 trace system.db.CDbCommand
Querying SQL: SHOW CREATE TABLE `section`
01:57:00.718086 trace system.db.ar.CActiveRecord
Section.findAll()
01:57:00.718199 trace system.db.CDbCommand
Querying SQL: SELECT * FROM `section` `t` WHERE `published` = 1 ORDER BY
`order` ASC
01:57:00.719717 trace system.db.ar.CActiveRecord
Section.find()
01:57:00.719785 trace system.db.CDbCommand
Querying SQL: SELECT * FROM `section` `t` WHERE id = 8 LIMIT 1
01:57:00.721364 trace system.db.CDbCommand
Querying SQL: SHOW COLUMNS FROM `section_option`
01:57:00.723737 trace system.db.CDbCommand
Querying SQL: SHOW CREATE TABLE `section_option`
01:57:00.724807 trace system.db.ar.CActiveRecord
SectionOption.find()
01:57:00.724875 trace system.db.CDbCommand
Querying SQL: SELECT * FROM `section_option` `t` WHERE `id`=76 LIMIT 1
01:57:00.732664 trace system.db.ar.CActiveRecord
SectionOption.findAll()
01:57:00.733577 trace system.db.CDbCommand
Querying SQL: SELECT * FROM `section_option` `t` WHERE section_id = 8 AND
`published`=1 ORDER BY `order` ASC
01:57:00.739191 trace system.db.ar.CActiveRecord
SectionOption.findAll()
01:57:00.739404 trace system.db.CDbCommand
Querying SQL: SELECT * FROM `section_option` `t` WHERE `published` = 1 AND
`section_id` = 1 ORDER BY `order` ASC
01:57:00.748075 trace system.db.ar.CActiveRecord
SectionOption.findAll()
01:57:00.748214 trace system.db.CDbCommand
Querying SQL: SELECT * FROM `section_option` `t` WHERE `published` = 1 AND
`section_id` = 2 ORDER BY `order` ASC
01:57:00.751897 trace system.db.ar.CActiveRecord
SectionOption.findAll()
01:57:00.752026 trace system.db.CDbCommand
Querying SQL: SELECT * FROM `section_option` `t` WHERE `published` = 1 AND
`section_id` = 3 ORDER BY `order` ASC
01:57:00.754050 trace system.db.ar.CActiveRecord
SectionOption.findAll()
01:57:00.754143 trace system.db.CDbCommand
Querying SQL: SELECT * FROM `section_option` `t` WHERE `published` = 1 AND
`section_id` = 4 ORDER BY `order` ASC
01:57:00.755887 trace system.db.ar.CActiveRecord
SectionOption.findAll()
01:57:00.755990 trace system.db.CDbCommand
Querying SQL: SELECT * FROM `section_option` `t` WHERE `published` = 1 AND
`section_id` = 5 ORDER BY `order` ASC
01:57:00.757633 trace system.db.ar.CActiveRecord
SectionOption.findAll()
01:57:00.757733 trace system.db.CDbCommand
Querying SQL: SELECT * FROM `section_option` `t` WHERE `published` = 1 AND
`section_id` = 6 ORDER BY `order` ASC
01:57:00.759475 trace system.db.ar.CActiveRecord
SectionOption.findAll()
01:57:00.759567 trace system.db.CDbCommand
Querying SQL: SELECT * FROM `section_option` `t` WHERE `published` = 1 AND
`section_id` = 7 ORDER BY `order` ASC
01:57:00.780637 trace system.db.CDbCommand
Querying SQL: SHOW COLUMNS FROM `subscription`
01:57:00.784698 trace system.db.CDbCommand
Querying SQL: SHOW CREATE TABLE `subscription`
01:57:00.812649 trace system.db.ar.CActiveRecord
Taxonomy.findAll()
01:57:00.812808 trace system.db.CDbCommand
Querying SQL: SELECT * FROM `Taxonomy` `t` WHERE Lft <= 74 AND Rgt >= 75
ORDER BY Lft
01:57:00.817761 trace system.db.ar.CActiveRecord
Taxonomy.findAll()
01:57:00.817826 trace system.db.CDbCommand
Querying SQL: SELECT * FROM `Taxonomy` `t` WHERE Lft <= 106 AND Rgt >= 121
ORDER BY Lft
01:57:00.820527 trace system.db.ar.CActiveRecord
Taxonomy.findAll()
01:57:00.820597 trace system.db.CDbCommand
Querying SQL: SELECT * FROM `Taxonomy` `t` WHERE Lft <= 155 AND Rgt >= 156
ORDER BY Lft
01:57:00.823513 trace system.db.ar.CActiveRecord
Taxonomy.findAll()
01:57:00.823587 trace system.db.CDbCommand
Querying SQL: SELECT * FROM `Taxonomy` `t` WHERE Lft <= 157 AND Rgt >= 158
ORDER BY Lft
01:57:00.828296 trace system.db.ar.CActiveRecord
Content.findAll()
01:57:00.828411 trace system.db.CDbCommand
Querying SQL: SELECT * FROM `Content` `t` WHERE (Active=1) AND
(ContentTypeID IN (7)) ORDER BY DateCreatedTimestamp DESC  LIMIT 1
01:57:00.868257 trace system.db.ar.CActiveRecord
Content.findAll()
01:57:00.868334 trace system.db.CDbCommand
Querying SQL: SELECT * FROM `Content` `t` WHERE (Active=1) AND
(ContentTypeID IN (4,12)) ORDER BY DateCreatedTimestamp DESC  LIMIT 1
01:57:00.919071 trace system.db.ar.CActiveRecord
Content.findAll()
01:57:00.919833 trace system.db.CDbCommand
Querying SQL: SELECT * FROM `Content` `t` WHERE (Active=1) AND
(ContentTypeID IN (18)) ORDER BY DateCreatedTimestamp DESC  LIMIT 1
01:57:00.998847 trace system.db.ar.CActiveRecord
Content.find()
01:57:01.179 trace system.db.CDbCommand
Querying SQL: SELECT * FROM `Content` `t` WHERE Active=1 AND
VisibilityTypeID=2 AND ContentTypeID IN (1,4,11,12,23,24) ORDER BY
DateCreatedTimestamp DESC LIMIT 1
01:57:01.44348 trace system.db.ar.CActiveRecord
Content.find()
01:57:01.44635 trace system.db.CDbCommand
Querying SQL: SELECT * FROM `Content` `t` WHERE Active=1 AND
VisibilityTypeID=2 AND ContentTypeID IN (5,6,7,8) ORDER BY
DateCreatedTimestamp DESC LIMIT 1
01:57:01.85799 trace system.db.ar.CActiveRecord
Content.find()
01:57:01.85913 trace system.db.CDbCommand
Querying SQL: SELECT * FROM `Content` `t` WHERE Active=1 AND
VisibilityTypeID=2 AND ContentTypeID IN (25) ORDER BY DateCreatedTimestamp
DESC LIMIT 1
01:57:01.130831 trace system.db.ar.CActiveRecord
Content.findAll()
01:57:01.131017 trace system.db.CDbCommand
Querying SQL: SELECT * FROM `Content` `t` WHERE EditorsTopPick=1 AND
Active=1 AND VisibilityTypeID=2 AND ContentTypeID IN
(5,6,7,8,18,25,1,23,10,11,4) ORDER BY DateCreatedTimestamp DESC LIMIT 10
01:57:01.181818 trace system.db.ar.CActiveRecord
TaxonomyLookup.findAll()
01:57:01.182533 trace system.db.CDbCommand
Querying SQL: SELECT * FROM `TaxonomyLookup` `t` WHERE (TaxonomyID = 175 OR
TaxonomyID = 176) AND TaxonomyItemTypeID = 1
01:57:01.186280 trace system.db.ar.CActiveRecord
Content.count()
01:57:01.186537 trace system.db.CDbCommand
Querying SQL: SELECT COUNT(DISTINCT `t`.ContentID) FROM `Content` `t` WHERE
ContentTypeID = 16  
    					AND Active = 1 
    					AND VisibilityTypeID = 2 
    					AND (ExpirationTimestamp IS NULL OR ExpirationTimestamp >=
1398405421)
    					AND ContentID IN
(2591,3922,4144,4214,4263,4516,4517,4632,4658,4739,4850,5087,5088,5219,5224,5226,5289,2591,4090,4142,4188,4656,4657,4956)
01:57:01.189209 trace system.db.ar.CActiveRecord
Content.findAll()
01:57:01.189321 trace system.db.CDbCommand
Querying SQL: SELECT DISTINCT * FROM `Content` `t` WHERE ContentTypeID = 16
 
    					AND Active = 1 
    					AND VisibilityTypeID = 2 
    					AND (ExpirationTimestamp IS NULL OR ExpirationTimestamp >=
1398405421)
    					AND ContentID IN
(2591,3922,4144,4214,4263,4516,4517,4632,4658,4739,4850,5087,5088,5219,5224,5226,5289,2591,4090,4142,4188,4656,4657,4956)
ORDER BY LastModifiedTimestamp DESC LIMIT 3
01:57:01.202287 trace system.db.ar.CActiveRecord
Content.findAll()
01:57:01.202521 trace system.db.CDbCommand
Querying SQL: SELECT * FROM `Content` `t` WHERE
ContentTypeID=:contentTypeId AND LENGTH(Body)<=:maxChars ORDER BY RAND()
LIMIT 2
01:57:01.251770 trace system.db.ar.CActiveRecord
Content.findAll()
01:57:01.251935 trace system.db.CDbCommand
Querying SQL: SELECT * FROM `Content` `t` WHERE
ContentTypeID=:contentTypeId AND LENGTH(Body)<=:maxChars ORDER BY RAND()
LIMIT 2
01:57:01.343034 trace system.CModule
Loading "assetManager" application component