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Addiction / Codependency (82)

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  1. The Key to Ending Unconscious Self-Defeating Patterns
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    The more we intend to uncover the parts of us complicit in creating self-defeating patterns such as addictive behaviors and codependent relationships -- and how we're always dragged down by this unconscious proclivity -- the more liberating discoveries we will make. It's a law: Ask to see the truth (of yourself) -- then do what you must to be granted that revelation...

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  2. Recognize and Reject Sick Spirits
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    Sadly for those deceived, and dangerous for the spiritually unwary they encounter, many humans have unknowingly abandoned themselves to dark spirits in exchange for the strong sense of self the presence of such negative energies provides as it courses through them. These souls who are taken over don't know their actual state as part of the "pleasure" in their condition is their certainty that...

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  3. Climb Up to True Independence
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    Depending on others for a sense of independent psychological well-being is an accident waiting to happen. In any relationship where one depends on his or her partner to be their parachute and the other accepts this role, both will fall to the ground. You do not have to live with this kind of fear for one more moment. Give yourself permission to see the whole truth about human nature and its af...

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  4. Choose to Change Now
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    You can't change the kind of person you are later. There is no later. It's always now or never. You can't be kind later. And you can't learn later. Choose to change now, and that moment will never come for you to worry about how to be better next time. Why? Because your conscious choice for real change in the present moment automatically cancels the need for a better you in a better future...

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  5. Catch Yourself Before Acting From Weakness
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    Any time we pretend to be something we're not, we do so out of fear that without that "persona" to protect us we won't get what we want.

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  6. Detect and Reject Despair
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    The secret purpose of that self-loathing nature in us -- that wants us to suffer today for what we could not do yesterday -- is not there to help us make straight our mistakes, but rather to ensure that we waste the rest of our days struggling to escape the ache of useless regrets. Awake! Detect and reject despair! It is not the guiding light it seems to be, but it is a cold heat that compromi...

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  7. Learn to Accept What Life Would Teach You
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    Though we often find ourselves feeling so, in truth... there is no such thing as being powerless. We see how a person who resists life -- who hates or fears unwanted changes -- becomes the instrument of a power that effectively renders him powerless to do anything but struggle. But we've seen the converse as well: the one who realizes that the only power negative states have is to create the i...

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  8. Practice Getting Out of Your Own Way
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    In spite of how things may appear to us, we are never trapped by where we are. The trap is always who we are.

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  9. Let Go and Rise Above What Holds You Down
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    Each time we see the need to let go of something -- a bad habit that drags us down, an unsatisfactory relationship, a career choice that can't complete us in the way we dreamed it would, or maybe unrealistic expectations of ours about others that eventually spoil our partnerships with them -- whatever it may be: what is it that's actually happened in these moments of honest self-examination? S...

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  10. The Key to a New Independent Life
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    There are parts of us that would rather be punished by unkind people than have to spend one minute being alone, because the only way these same parts in us can exist is if they have someone to resent or somehow fear. In this case we remain in these ruinous relationships because the fear or emptiness we feel in even considering leaving them seems to be too much to bear on our own. Here's the k...

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  11. The Source of True Self-Liberation
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    You must learn to stop thinking in terms of beginnings and endings, successes and failures, and begin to treat everything in your life as a learning experience instead of a proving one.

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  12. Your Secret Power of Self-Disconnect
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    Deliberately disconnecting yourself from whatever you think has you blocked leads to true self-liberation because you have never been trapped by anything outside of your own lack of understanding.

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  13. Remember This Key to Self-Command
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    The key to regaining command of yourself in any moment you start to feel as though you're in a rush is to remember that who you are and what you are is made to be changing and transforming the moment you are in.

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  14. Unmask the Hidden Power of All Negative States
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    One of the most difficult lessons we must face in our effort to win the war within ourselves has to do with the truth about our relationship with our own negative states: they fascinate us. That's right! But, why do we value them so? The answer will surprise you. We value negative states because of the strong sense of self we get from them. This may be very difficult for us to see, but a stro...

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  15. How to Stop Giving Yourself Away!
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    Time and time again, we come to the same spiritual lesson: no one can give us that which can only be found within our Self.

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  16. How to Stop the Spiritually Sick from Infecting You
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    Those with whom we assemble we will soon resemble, so the simple old saying goes. Yet it tells of a deep truth. It says that who we are -- the stuff of our soul at present -- is being transformed continuously by the nature of the company we keep; so that, in our essence we are always moving and evolving towards a kind of psychic oneness with whatever relationships we have revolving around us t...

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  17. Cut the Root of What's Wrecking Your Life
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    The unsure self that not only looks for, but attaches itself to codependent relationships -- cannot possibly be the real you. Let's see why this statement has to be true. The real you is that silent "I" within you whose awareness understands -- without having to think about it -- that you are on this earth (going through all of these events) to grow, to realize ever-higher stages of your self.

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  18. Coming to the End of Codependency
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    Whenever we consent to, or otherwise agree with anyone's dark assessment of his or her life, we are telling this person, "Yes, that is true (about you). No doubt life couldn't be any other way; after all . . . what else can you do?" In these sentiments is hidden a secret message that effectively says: "Sure . . . I understand the prison you are in and -- given your conditions -- it's only logi...

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  19. Be Yourself and Be Complete
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    When we find ourselves looking for something outside ourselves -- anything -- to complete us, to make us feel whole and happy, what is the nature of this force within us? What kind of power compels us to move heaven and earth to find a way to fulfill ourselves in this way? The answer is surprising! We are driven on by our sense of being incomplete. None of us would feel this compulsion to co...

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