Before we can learn how to step outside the pattern set into motion by some habitual negative reaction toward others, we need a better understanding of the underlying forces that create it. In other words, we must find a way to look at these same moments through a "new set of eyes."

As a race of beings, we have become completely complicit in the pain that visits us. A thought from the past pops up and punishes us. Someone says something we don't like, and we try to punish them and feel the pain of the blame that we place on them. There is an endless series of relationships with a part of our own nature that has convinced us that the pain is produced by a condition outside of us...

Where is my attention? Guy Finley explains why this is an important question. The resistance I feel when things don't go the way I want them to go isn't resistance to what's happening but to my unseen expectations of how I think things should be. Then my mind connects my attention to my body, and my body literally becomes a mirror of that internal conflict.

Everyone wants to know how to think their way out of painful situations, especially the ones that keep repeating in our lives. Guy explains how to start seeing this question with a new mind by being conscious and aware of when we start to overthink it.

Every day we are attacked by a multitude of pains, so frequent and so familiar we don't even question them. In fact, we accept them as friends, as something to occupy us. These pains can range from petty irritations to the anxiety we feel every time we write a check and see our bank balance decrease, to concerns about our health. One of the major sources of pain involves other people and our relationships with them.

In this answer to a viewer's question, "Secret of Letting Go" author Guy Finley explains that the ending of any form of addiction begins when we stop following the suggested actions for resolution that come from the very problem itself.

Have you ever noticed that you get rid of one person in your life, and you get somebody just like it? But you didn't get somebody just like it. You got you again! That's the lesson, isn't it? You should be so tired of pointing your finger at other people...

In this answer to a viewer's question, "Secret of Letting Go" author Guy Finley explains that a genuine resolution to psychological pain will never be found within the very system that produces the pain in the first place. Awareness of this fact is the answer that you're looking for.

In this answer to a viewer's question, "letting go" author Guy Finley talks about how self-knowledge is the power needed to triumph over any kind of chronic addiction, physical or psychological.

In this answer to a viewer's question, Guy explains that there's nothing that you can look at in your life that doesn't teach you about yourself, if you know where to look.

One of the reasons that you live with the pain that you do is because you don't understand that you don't have to. And the only way you're ever going to shake off that pain -- get off "the pain train" - is if you start to get fighting mad about what is making you the kind of human being that you are. I don't know if you can see it. I hope that you can. As a race of beings, we have become...

Why do we end up as often as we do in those painful situations in which the last words usually spoken go something like, "How in the world did I get myself into this mess?" Sound familiar? It should. And while the answer to this woeful question should rescue us from similar future sticky situations, it rarely works out that way. This is very important to admit to ourselves..."