Whatever form your resentments may take, they wreck only you... not the one you resent. So, here's a key thought to help you release this self-wrecking inner state: Holding onto some hurt or hatred -- over what someone may have done to you in the past - makes you that person's slave in the here and now.
If you're tired of being a slave to a painful relationship out of your past, this study and step in how to release resentments is sure to bring welcome relief.
For this lesson to succeed in its intended purpose, it's important to understand that resentment is a bitter pill made up of two layers. The first layer is created by our refusal to be self-ruling; saying "yes" when we really want to say "no!" is one good example. Fawning before others for fear of their reprisal is another. Both weak actions breed resentment, because our wish to falsely accommodate compromises our natural need to be self-commanding.
The second layer is resentment's "active" ingredient, the psychological component that keeps it alive and unwell: dark inner dialogue -- a negative tug-of-war in the unseen recesses of our mind where we're the only one pulling on both ends of the rope. These unconscious conflicts, in dialogue form, play themselves out in our mind by painfully reenacting various scenes from our past; moments gone by in which we either know, or sense, we were compromised by our own weakness.
If these inner dialogues were left to themselves as they popped into our mind, they'd be as powerless to disturb us as an echo is to change its own sound. Where we get into trouble, when resentment rules, is when we're unknowingly drawn into these scenes out of our past and find ourselves interacting with a cast of ghost players! The ensuing mental dialogue is always a desperate but futile attempt to change what has already been said and done so that maybe this time around we can come out a winner.
Are you tired of going twelve rounds in routine fight scenes that always turn out the same? Try this step for the winning solution.
If you sat down on a metal bench and suddenly realized the midday sun had heated it way beyond the comfort zone, you'd stand up as quickly as you could. The same intelligence behind this instinctive physical reaction can help you release all resentments and drop their dark inner dialogues.
Each time you catch yourself in a dark inner dialogue, of any kind, use your awareness of the conflict it's creating within you as a springboard to help you leap out of those scary scenes from your past into the safety of the present moment. Then, instead of giving yourself back over to those inner voices of conflict that are still trying to converse with you, remain aware of yourself in the present moment, and of their continuing beckoning presence.
No matter how many times you hear in your mind those fighting words that have always prompted you to jump into that dark dialogue, refuse to join in. Ground yourself in your awareness of the present moment.
The unconscious resentment responsible for creating heated scenes from the past cannot follow you into the now, which means no dark inner dialogue can tag along either. Why? Because when you're no longer a captive of your own past, you can recognize its ghost voices as the source of psychic intrusion they really are.