False Self

Nothing is more discontented than our lower nature, the false self. It is always unhappy with one thing or another. If there is one weed in a field of roses, you can bet that is what it will see. Since it has no real life of its own, it must endlessly create stimulating thoughts and feelings of one kind or another in order to give it the sensations of being alive. Like Sisyphus, the king of an...

One of the most difficult lessons we must face in our effort to win the war within ourselves has to do with the truth about our relationship with our own negative states: they fascinate us. That's right! But, why do we value them so? The answer will surprise you. We value negative states because of the strong sense of self we get from them. This may be very difficult for us to see, but a stro...

What about you? Are you sure you have to go down with that ship called an abusive relationship, substance abuse, or the self-pity that always attends these punishing states of self? Do you see yourself as someone addicted to something, and believe this sinking condition is the way it has to be? Does it feel as though there is no way out from under that barrage of negative thoughts and feelings...

There is nothing wrong with being a successful human being. In fact, the purpose of your life is to win. But what if, in your quest for this victory, you were accidentally drawn into a compelling game in which, unknown to you, it was impossible to win no matter how well you performed or religiously followed the "rules?" Where, instead of finding the freedom to run as you wish, you found yours...

Whenever we consent to, or otherwise agree with anyone's dark assessment of his or her life, we are telling this person, "Yes, that is true (about you). No doubt life couldn't be any other way; after all . . . what else can you do?" In these sentiments is hidden a secret message that effectively says: "Sure . . . I understand the prison you are in and -- given your conditions -- it's only logi...

Our usual reaction to any event not of our choosing is to fear it, so that our tendency is to see these experiences as being adversarial. These unwanted moments are seen as threats to our present happiness, as well as being a thorn in our tomorrow, because with any unwanted event comes the fear of not having the right answers to address the flood of new questions arising out of life's sudden t...

Doesn't this make perfect sense? If we need to be rescued from something, then whatever is rescuing us can't be part of what it rescues us from. Said in a different way, you don't jump on a tiger's back to escape a lion. A terrified rabbit running from a fox only thinks he finds safety when a coyote offers him shelter. This shows us that any desperate attempt to escape a trouble usually leads...

One thing is certain: whether in our waking life, or in the dreams that visit our evening's rest, thoughts and feelings fill our every present moment. But just because you can feel or sense all of their diverse characteristics -- such as worry, fear, impatience, courage, or compulsiveness -- doesn't make the "you" that experiences these movements real -- any more than standing under the ca...

There is something in us that actually enjoys feeling stressed. We must discover that we live with an opposing self. We can catch moments of opposition by coming back to ourselves.

Imagine a man lost in a series of deep and dark caverns. He anxiously shouts out "Hello!" and then strains to listen for a response. A heartbeat passes and in the distance he hears "Hello, hello." His spirits surge and off he races in the direction of the caller. He doesn't understand it is only an echo. He doesn't know he is following the sound of his own voice -- a voice that is taking him d...

Have you ever wondered why you're so easily upset by the unexpected? It's not really you who feels shaky when situations shift without warning. It's who you think you are that feels threatened -- but you don't have to go on feeling afraid. Beginning right now, with some patient self-investigation and the aid of a few higher facts, you will discover that you are not who you think you are. T...

Before speaking to someone who intimidates me, I sometimes feel my throat start to close up and my voice choke up with so much tension that I find it hard to speak. I've got to get behind this fear, but I don't know how! One way in which it's possible for us to outgrow the problems that we face is to not let those problems dictate our behavior to us. In this instance...