GF: Welcome everyone. Tonight we discuss an essential spiritual force missing from our lives. When I'm done with these first comments, and those following the chat, we will have gathered ample evidence of the fact of this insight as well as ways to recover this crucial force we unknowingly give away.

The power that we're missing is called patience. Real patience is not about waiting for one's expectations to be fulfilled. This is the kind of patience that we have now, and as we will see, it is necessarily filled with impatience; so, it isn't so much that we are actually patient, as it is that we are hanging around, impatiently, waiting for that moment to get what we have hoped for.

This kind of patience is a contrivance. We pretend to have patience while inwardly our own unappeased thoughts and feelings pound on us. What we will look into this evening are some facts about the true nature of patience, and what it is that we have to acquire -- meaning what we have to understand -- if there is any chance for us to become a different order of human being.

The way our present mind meets life is much like a machine, where most of our lives are spent in automatic reactions to moments where an expectation of ours meets either the fulfillment or the denial of our dreams. We have yet to see that our own conditioned expectations always set us up for a sorrow of some kind or another.

And what a sad state of affairs this is; our hopes are tied to the secret source of our heartaches -- not just for our pressing wish to acquire more money, a better house, more respect, another relationship, what have you, but also according to the degree to which we demand these expectations be met.

What must we do to change our unconscious condition? First, we must get to the point where we see, and admit, our essential powerlessness to provide for ourselves what we believe can make us happy. This is a necessary stage in our spiritual development: to realize we don't have a clue how to help ourselves become whole. This discovery alone makes it possible for us to learn real patience.

There are many references to the nature of real patience throughout all great scriptures world over, including both New and Old Testaments. From Luke: "In your patience possess ye your souls." Another, from James: "But let patience have her perfect work that ye may be perfect and entire, wanting nothing. But be ye doers of the word and not hearers only, deceiving yourself." And the last one that I'll mention here comes from Romans 8:24: "For we are saved by hope. But hope that is seen is not hope. For what a man seeth why doth he yet hope for? But if we hope for that we see not, then do we with patience wait for it."

What this passage (and the others) would convey to us is that the true spiritual path can't have anything to do with some imagined quality of consciousness that we can give to ourselves because, for one thing, in the very imagining of that quality, whatever its name, we end up becoming impatient to possess it! This is a vital point: Our desires create an extremely powerful second force in us; and gradually, as we struggle to be seen as we hope others will see us -- loving, wise, strong, gentle, and patient -- we come unglued! Instead of being patient, kind, and compassionate, we become the opposite: a raging volcano of conflicting desires that finally explodes. Clearly this approach doesn't work.

In order to achieve our hope for what is not seen -- a new and true patience, a forgiveness of others that sets us free, whatever that spiritual state may be we know exists but that eludes us -- we must learn something altogether new: We must learn what it means to be patient with what we can no longer do and be. There is an immense difference in this idea versus setting out to win a pleasing identity.

At present, our impatience with what we hope to do or become is born out of a series of mental images and expectations that are created in a mind asleep to its own considerations. From these images we take imagined pleasure and power, without ever coming to understand why we remain unable to manifest these self-pleasing images except under certain favorable conditions.

Here is a whole different idea: We must stop pretending. We must learn a new kind of patience -- not with regards to getting what we want, but with those pressing, stressed parts of us that insist we must have (or be) what we want when we want it!

Can we see the difference between these two actions? The former patience is an illusion: the idea that if we are just patient and swallow what we must to get our hands on what we want, that patience will prove itself in the end and we will get our reward.

This new and conscious patience that we speak of has nothing to do with the love of things, or of sensations, but with the love of what is True, what is good and graceful, spiritual in nature. It embraces the love of that which cannot be owned outright by any human being but that must be permitted to possess us if we are ever to know its peace-giving and perfectly patient presence.

Inside of this new idea of patience we can begin to understand so much of what has been so elusive for us, including freeing ourselves from this terrible sense of emptiness that always follows having expectations either fulfilled or dashed. At the end of the chat we will explore some specific ways to develop and realize the kind of higher patience we have discussed in these opening comments.

Now it's your turn. What shall we discuss this evening? You are on.

asabovesobelow: Great topic for my concerns this evening. I have several interests (lifelong) available to me now. I am in no position to take up these simple interests due to money (lack thereof). Does this mean it is false purpose? I have been patient for many years and now I can partake in an honest positive interest I have always wished for. How can I keep things in perspective as I see this may be something I cannot partake in? This seems REALLY unfair and confusing.

GF: Nothing that we do in life is done without a corresponding cost. This is a Law. What we waste in one place (even though we think we might be gaining something) always causes a loss for us in another place. On the other hand, the love of something is literally an undeniable force. If you must be patient with present circumstances that exist due to a past waste on your part, then wait patiently. Do not waste what you have thinking about what is unfair. Use your energy to remember what you love. Love will take care of the rest.

asabovesobelow: I am looking to pursue some other of these interests that are located in other parts of the country. I will have to leave parents (I am one of the most important and positive thing in their lives) and familiar surroundings. I have both pulling at me and do not know which to listen to. I know I can't keep my life still for my parents, but I do love them. I do not want to get into worse circumstances either.

GF: As long as one makes choices based on what they fear will occur, as opposed to what they intend to happen, he will not only go "nowhere," but he will become moribund in his own trepidations.

pam: How can I tell the difference between impatience and the ensuing anxiety from the feeling that my self is trying to tell me to make a drastic change to escape a workplace (and nice paycheck) that feels full of negative energy?

GF: The anxiety you speak of is not because you wish to make a change in your life, but is due to the parts of yourself that are unconsciously considering (and therefore fearing) what the outcome of such change would mean to you. Part of our work is to separate fear from fact. Fear has no home in us without entering into a form we provide for it through negative imagination. Impatience in this instance is always born of an anticipated pleasure in making this change that you want to realize.

TruthStudent: I heard you say once that "fear fears fear" but I don't recall the context… would you please elaborate?

GF: There can be no state of fearing something "to come" that doesn't begin with negative imagination. The more imagined fears we fear, the more "real" they become for us.

TruthStudent: Whoever said that what we call "fear" is fear? We don't just feel the sensations, we label the sensations through thought/memory and then based on the label either pursue or avoid the continuation of the sensation. Am I close to the mark with this?

GF: Yes, this is essentially true.

TruthStudent: Our undeveloped minds think in opposites so we fear life and then seek security from life through creating images of life that we then live from and through. Is this accurate?

GF: Yes, this is accurately stated.

RobF: I have a friend who is adversely affected by a true phobia. Have you written anything that would give insight into how to heal this type of affliction?

GF: I would suggest one of the tapes (T236) from our book store. It's entitled: "Learn the Secret Action that ends Fear." This will bring needed light into the darkness you speak of.

here: How can unwanted, unexpected moments help us reach our spiritual promise? All I see myself doing is fighting to get through them, and when I do, I wait for the next "deal" to fight through.

GF: One of the first major realizations we must have is that all we ever meet in any given moment is ourselves. This means that moments unwanted or otherwise simply serve to reveal the nature we have brought into that same moment. Once this is understood, we can use moments consciously for the mirrors that they are. This changes us. Then we no longer fear "moments," but welcome their instructions.

molly: What about when you reach the level of trust and understanding that you speak of and then things are snatched away from you unexpectedly?

GF: The biggest problem that all of us face on this path towards a life awakened in the Light is that our attention, and therefore our derivative sense of self, is always on things outside of ourselves. If we could only remember to remember that our True Life is an interior understanding of our relationship with the world around us, then such unwanted, unexpected moments would no longer act as sources of pain for us, but actually serve to help us fulfill our own spiritual promise.

molly: But why then do we get to experience love here with another if we are only seeking our self?

GF: This life is a preparation for Love, and our relationships with others serve as little more than a way in which to discover both those parts of ourselves that would prohibit compassion as well as those parts that are kindness itself.

TruthStudent: In all sincerity: Why does there have to be a God, a Higher Power for us to believe in? Could we not just be biological creatures created by the forces of nature through an eventual matter of chance? Why do we need to create meaning to our existence by (even) believing in a God and believing that a superior entity created all this. Please, help!

GF: There's nothing wrong with your question. The only problem that we face as a species created to be self-aware is that we continue to try and create meaning for ourselves based upon either love of or fear of experience. Any person who approaches the study of Truth -- the reality of what is -- gradually has proven to him or her that there exists a compassionate Intelligence that is intimately woven into our being. The fact that we learn lessons that leave us more loving proves the existence of a greater nature expressing itself to us and through us in these lessons that leave us more whole. Lastly, by the fact that we do become more whole for these lessons proves the existence of a "Cosmic Curriculum."

Myno: My 84 year old father is dying and my stepmother (his wife) is controlling things that my Dad's three kids can't live with. Now everyone is fighting over no money and a will never written. Everyone is fighting and hating and we all have loving natures that are now angry and out of control. I need to have patience in love because I'm completely in anger and can't get away from it.

GF: Real Love never turns into anything hateful. It's impossible. This would be like a dove becoming a dragon. Try to use the condition you've described for the purpose of discovering the Truth of yourself and everyone else around you. This may be shocking and will be. But, if you're willing to see how human lives can be turned into trash cans by a turn of event, then you have a chance to change not only your own nature, but to truly help those you love. Don't avoid seeing what you must.

momfez: How does one cope with intense anger between father and son and the shouting of expletives between them? It makes me feel so sad and helpless, yet nothing I say changes the situation.

GF: There's an Aesop's fable about a bull and a lion contesting with one another for a small pool of water. Above them in a tree sits a vulture, smiling. The meaning of this story is: Stay out of any war between others, as all you can do is become a casualty of that unconscious action. If you get involved, then you will find yourself part of the problem instead of learning to rise above the pain (in them and in yourself) that produces such conflict.

aag: You say that you shouldn't "argue over anything." This is not the same as if you disagree with someone and voice your opinion. You just mean that you shouldn't "shout about anything." Is that a fair interpretation?

GF: Negativity is always wrong no matter what one says or does to justify it.

AJ: What was the original purpose of negative states? Anger to fight off a bear, desire to compete for mating, etc.? I would like to put these opposites in their right place.

GF: There is no real center in a human being for a negative state. Negative states are the negative effects of a mind unconscious to itself, trying to resolve a condition it is given to transcend that it doesn't understand how to do. There is no resolution for a negative state in terms of "a positive to balance it." When we bring the light of self-awareness into a disturbance in us, that disturbance is transformed into something new within us. When we don't bring this light, then our mechanical nature resists this disturbance and, lo and behold, a negative state is born that always seeks to resolve itself... which it can't.

Grayson: Is it spiritually beneficial to study how doctors of psychiatry, etc. have determined how the brain works in the earthly, physical world?

GF: Intellectual knowledge is an elementary stage in our development. Far better than a rational understanding provided by the works of others is the personal experience of one's own mind through an impersonal observation of its workings. Such insight not only makes us wiser, but changes the very nature of the mind having been observed.

DanG: Self-remembering is such a key to the work. Is an example of self-remembering to see how low we are in the scale of the universe and how unimportant our problems are in the scale of things?

GF: No. Self-remembering is a very specific act brought about either by the deliberate action of one's attention or a bit of grace that uses one's attention for the purposes that grace seeks. I just gave, in the last 10 days, a full talk on this subject. Contact Chris through this website for information on how to get this talk. You'll find it very helpful.

DanG: Can you give an example of how you self-remember?

GF: Come awake right now. Sense that your body is in a room. At the same time, know that thoughts and feelings are within the room of yourself within that room. Finally, realize that the self aware of itself within the world sits within another world invisible to itself and that is essentially unthinkable. This full awareness partially encompasses self-remembering.

Danna: I still have great difficulty staying present when I eat. I am sure my unconsciousness starts long before I am overwhelmed, but what can I do in that moment to become more receptive to living/knowing Truth to pull me out of unconsciousness?

GF: No intention of ours is any better or stronger than our ability to remember it. What this means is that we must never forget our own tendencies. If we can remember that we have a tendency to go to sleep to ourselves when we eat or stand in a line somewhere, then we have a change to work within ourselves to change what our self does within these moments.

AJ: Does "enlightenment" actually exist? If so, what is the real definition of it?

GF: The answer to your question is yes, but not in the way you think. Every insight a man has about his own nature is a form of light brought into the former darkness of himself. That darkness is changed, therefore it is (and he is) enlightened. This process is in scale, and there comes a time when there is more light in a man or a woman than darkness. That would be one way to describe enlightenment.

rousseau: What is the difference between the natural growth and maturing of a human and enlightenment? I look to my dad who is a realized man to a certain degree, and I can talk to him about what we talk about in class to a certain degree (using different colloquialisms since he doesn't participate in or read your literature). He has actually sparked my own interest in these things as a child. I wonder whether he is enlightened, or how far a person can actually go?

GF: Such concerns are really not important. I can tell you that enlightenment is never a "natural" phenomenon when it comes to individuals.

Grayson: I'm not clear on exactly what "levels" and "scales" are, really. How can I learn more about them?

GF: The series of talks I gave here in June, "The Turning Point," is fully based in helping others understand the idea of scale and levels. You can order this now by contacting Chris through our website. Tell her Guy suggested it. The actual tape or CD album will be on our website as available in the next two weeks.

TruthStudent: We're asleep spiritual beings. Why do we need to realize what we already know? Sincerely: Why wake up at all if we're all to return to Eternity when we pass?

GF: Stevie Wonder said, "When you believe in things you don't understand... then you suffer; superstition is not the way." It is a lie and a tragedy that is passed off on mankind by religious hypocrites and other phony-baloney spiritual leaders that when one passes, he or she -- by some right -- enters into Eternity. Spiritual development is voluntary, not evolutionary.

mikejb35: Do you mean that we enter into Eternity now (or not) by our own choices in the here and now?

GF: Our task is to remember our wish for a real life, to do the work that we know to do given what we understand in that moment, and then to allow the Light to do for us what only it can do. All else is hearsay and a waste.

DanG: I think nobody knows what happens to us when we pass from this earth. Human thought has tried to come up with theories but really nobody knows for sure.

GF: Never mind what anybody or everybody else knows or doesn't know. Find out for yourself, and I assure you, you can.

mobilman: The word "power" is used many times in the Bible. Jesus had it when He walked according to those stories in the Bible. Paul said, "the kingdom is not in word but in power." Do you know of this power?

GF: It's a much deeper subject than a chat room paragraph would allow for, but we can say a few things. There is the power of thought. Its force can manifest things in this world. But without opposites and knowledge, these thoughts not only have no existence, but are effectively powerless. There is another kind of power, and that is the one that sits behind thought and that gives rise to it. This is a spiritual power, actually a form of light.

Broccoli: Does unfulfilled desire make a soul come back to Earth? And if so, and if greed can never be satisfied, how does one get desire out of their system?

GF: Desires cannot be overcome or run out of one's system. They can only be answered with the understanding that no desire in itself is capable of completing the self that is possessed by that desire.

Grayson: I have observed myself during experiences, and found that I have taken some natural drives I was born with and created associations with other things in life to create false beliefs, false thoughts, and my false self. Does this conclusion seem right?

GF: If what you're asking is the following, then your answer is correct: There are natural parts of us that are overcome and subverted by what have become unnatural aspects or desires that seek to serve themselves at the cost of us.

Grayson: If natural parts of us are subverted by unnatural aspects or desires that seek to serve themselves only, then doesn't that mean that the mind has invited them in as being part of what it thinks of as "truth," by associating something or someone to its own nature and coming up with something false that it thinks is "true?"

GF: Yes, which only goes to underline the need for awakening from this order of self that thinks about what is good to another level of ourselves that sees what is true without taking thought to know this.

TruthStudent: Would it be correct to assume that the nature that makes a person seek the Truth is the Truth itself? I hurt, but I still seek answers.

GF: You have hinted at something that one day you will know the Truth of if you will only stay the Course. It is Truth itself that stirs us to find it in ourselves, even though it seems to send us out into a world where there is no truth. When we weary of wandering that world, the world we have always been looking for reveals the truth of itself to us within us.

rousseau: I suffer from most all the ailments you have ever described in your books, tapes and online. I don't really have any specific questions, but I want to understand how to put all these pieces together and move on without these distractions.

GF: One thing a man never suspects is that the things that he wishes would not follow him around, do so because of a secret fascination he has for them. Only as he awakens to the duplicity inherent in his own divided mind does he bring an end to this unconscious conspiracy, which is the same as changing himself. Come back and visit as soon as you can.

AJ: What is the "ego" and why is it such a bad thing according to almost all spiritual paths?

GF: Saying that the ego is a bad thing would be like saying an acorn is negative relative to the oak that grows out of it.

mikejb35: Is the part of ourselves that sees thoughts impartially the Kingdom of Heaven Within or is there more to it than that?

GF: There's more to it than that.

TruthStudent: Please excuse the nature of this question. Outside of procreation, is there a place for proper sexuality in a person's life who is following Truth Teachings?

GF: Yes.

Broccoli: I live in NYC and my building is becoming infested with cockroaches. I feel sick every time I kill one, and yet I don't want them running about and taking the place over. What can you tell me about my situation? Is it wrong to kill a cockroach?

GF: All decisions such as whether to take the life of a creature or not must be found within the person facing the circumstance as you've described.

Grayson: I have read many of your books, and have recently bought many Vernon Howard books and tapes. Can I go to much higher levels on my own with this material and my own experiences alone, or do I need a teacher too?

GF: An individual's work can only go so far without being around someone who knows what he is like better than he does.

AJ: Will we ultimately find God within ourselves? If so, aren't we really God? If not, what is God?

GF: We are not God, yet God is our life. God is indeed within us, but so are we within that Life. Our present mind only knows how to relate to thoughts about things, including God. When that mind has become still, it realizes that it is not apart from that which expresses itself through it.

Broccoli: Is it wrong to be materially successful?

GF: There is nothing more empty in the Universe than material success for the sake of material success alone.

Grayson: Is an occasional beer a step back on the spiritual path?

GF: If it's "Light" beer, nothing bad can happen. Seriously, moderation is the password in all things.

DanG: It seems most of our problems are in identifying with a word such as "depression," "loneliness," and all words in general.

GF: The problem is not identifying with words, the problem is we are unconsciously drawn into the negative content that we freely associate with when we identify with these labels. Words in themselves are meaningless relative to their ability to make us miserable.

Danna: How do you know when your acceptance or unattachment to another's behavior (especially in male/female relationships) is just another form of manipulation?

GF: If you want something from another human being, you may be sure that there is manipulation going on. This is a Law. Trying to be unattached to another person is merely resistance to being attached.

aag: In my vision I often see a fleck that I believe is a spirit, plus I can see into the invisible world for moments at a time. I see various spirits or their movements. This is with eyes open, not closed, although I see them with eyes closed too. I am not scared by them, but it does seem that when I see them in my sight, they are too close by. Any comments? What further study should I do?

GF: It makes no difference what one sees as long as they remain quietly seeing whatever that may be. The meaning of things is not in what our mind tells us is happening, but rather in our own awareness of what happens within us as we relate to the world we see.

Grayson: Is it true that the first part of Love is objective Understanding, and then an acceptance of that Understanding, and that those things must come before TRUE Love can be present?

GF: What we might call real Love cannot be considered apart from its Source, so that our fully conscious relationship (oneness) with this objective state is necessary for Love to be active (through us).

asabovesobelow: I am having a hard time taking seriously most women I know and work with. I see their emotions and behaviors almost always contradictory and "all over the place." I wish not to disrespect or offend but need to work and have meaningful relationships, both personal and professional. What should I do if I am aiming for a higher ground? I feel like I am tolerating and not progressing.

GF: If one wishes to reach the mountain top, why bother about what takes place in the valleys he or she walks through (on the way)? Leave what you must and let what comes find you (as it will).

path4me: Can you elaborate on how "Doing anything in half measures, or leaving things hanging" drains away my vital force as you stated in the "21 Ways We Waste Our Vital Life Forces"?

GF: Fenelon, a great thinker of days gone, once said, "A stone beneath the earth weighs as much as one on the surface of the earth."

AJ: How do "psychic vampires" steal energy? Do they literally take our life energy or do they just make us fall into wasting it according to your "21 Ways"?

GF: Actually both are true. You must understand that we are never in a "neutral" atmosphere wherever we are, and that for the proximity of the people around us there is always a natural exchange occurring between fields of force. Negative, toxic people are human black holes with no choice but to draw into them whatever errant energies get sucked in. Others that draw us into their foolery also steal from us, but only for our unawareness of their foolish invitation.

asabovesobelow: I read and felt that the "21 Ways" spoke to me. I have a hard time understanding the "sexual imagining" part. I wish not to be such a "slave" towards adult material, imagining, and other useless pulls, but do not know what I should do or how to better myself. Aren't we sexual beings? I feel like I can't do anything about this low part of me. Do I have an addiction?

GF: Sexual feelings are not the problem. Wanting not to have them, or wanting to make something more of them than they are, that's the snag on the spiritual path.

$1: Every day I waste so much time instead of being productive. If I were properly conscious, would I naturally be productive in terms of being a good householder?

GF: You will be wonderfully surprised at what happens to you as you begin to awaken to the unconscious parts of yourself that not only waste your vital life forces, but that steal from you the natural delight of being effortlessly efficient.

molly: Doesn't God have a sense of humor? Everyone seems so serious on the spiritual path sometimes.

GF: Humor is a natural and delicious part of the Truth Path. Without it, no one gets past being identified with their own false seriousness.

TruthStudent: In your "Thou Art" prayer, no matter how hard I think, I can't come up with an "X" or a "Z." Please help.

GF: Why struggle with two letters that don't lend themselves to your aim? You have 24 left to find the intent of this exercise in prayer.

aag: It seems that at times there is now so much I have read of your work that there appears in my mind certain contradictions to what I should do in a particular circumstance. For example: "losing energy" vs. "if you put your attention outside of yourself you are inviting a crash" or "bearing another persons manifestations" vs. "telling them what you think." Is it just a question of keeping on working? Is there any way to see through these contradictions in my mind?

GF: The mind cannot do what only spirit is empowered to do. The only way to transcend these seeming contradictions is to recognize that struggling against one or the other can never resolve what it is that one is working to be free of. Learn as best you can to go quiet whenever your mind starts to wrestle with anything. Don't try to "think" your way out; see your way out.

aag: Is there any one rule or thing to focus on above all else in our search?

GF: Until our attention belongs to us, we can possess nothing real.

aag: Is the aim of this search to stop most thought or to just not allow yourself to get bogged down in it?

GF: You cannot stop thought other than by destroying yourself. But thought can be transcended and released by seeing its inherent limitations and liabilities.

Grayson: Was Jesus born of a virgin, and did he rise in the flesh at His resurrection? Also, where can I study more of what the Bible really meant that so many individuals do not know?

GF: We must realize that until the answers to these questions are alive in us, and not just parroted to comfort some ideological need to know, then we will remain subject to superstition and its fearful limitations. For more insight into this subject, and to help stimulate your natural wish to know the Truth from and for yourself, I would suggest you get the tape or CD series, "The Secret Teachings of the Sacred Testaments", Volume One or Two, as you wish.

ABC: Without going into too much detail, I have been divorced for three years and my ex-spouse has since remarried. The main reason was adultery on my ex-spouse's part and the divorce wasn't my choice. Given this circumstance, if I remarried someone who was never married, could I still remain on the spiritual path, or must it be a choice of one over the other? Any insights would be greatly appreciated.

GF: Do not trouble yourself over such concerns. Put Truth first and then let what follows, follow naturally.

aag: There is a voice that I hear that I don't think is mine that comments on my reactions to things, makes associations, etc. It is totally unconscious though. You have talked about seeing into unconscious reaction. I thought the unconscious was unconscious... or is it only unconscious until you uncover it? How do you go about it?

GF: Self-observation is a key element in learning to discern what is "ours" and what is not. Awareness of what has been unconscious begins the process of becoming conscious in a whole new away within ourselves.

aag: This concept of "losing energy" from The Intimate Enemy: Is it tied to the Chinese "chi"? Is it about not getting fixated on anything but letting thought into you and then out of you at more or less the same moment? Is fixation on anything akin to what you call identification?

GF: Yes, "fixation" is what you might call being identified with something or someone, so that one's sense of self becomes an unconscious derivative of that fixation (in thought or feeling).

Diojeneez: St. John of the Cross says, "If anyone affirms that one can reach perfection without practicing exterior mortification, do not believe him; and though he confirms his beliefs through miracles, know that his contentions are nothing but illusions." What is your word on this?

GF: The language of yesteryear does not mean what our present mind takes it to mean, nor what a sleeping consciousness would make of that practice. Anyone who mortifies his body does not what he thinks he does. On the other hand, we can steal from ourselves certain negative states and experience mortification through such acts.

asabovesobelow: Do you feel that we do not have certain things in life because we cannot handle them, i.e., money, availability, certain abundances? I do not know why very immoral people have these things as I struggle to pay the bills. I am not jealous, just confused.

GF: Any concerns we might have about "why" others have what we don't is an avoidance of seeing ourselves as we are.

hudnut: I was reading a little about Buddhism and it more or less advised followers to not accept praise from others or give praise to others. Is this because praise fuels the ego or false self?

GF: Yes, plus the fact that -- in the end -- one discovers that "only God ( the Divine) is Good."

aag: Why did you stop your music career?

GF: It was time.

AJ: Is it possible to rid ourselves of ALL desires like the Kriya Yoga attempts to do? Also, is Kriya Yoga a good path or would it just be a pit stop along the real path?

GF: Until we understand that we are not here to rid ourselves of desires, but do the necessary internal work whose ensuing light enters into and integrates these desires into their natural and necessary form, we can only waste our time moving from one opposite to another. Kriya Yoga aims to awaken certain energies that "burn out" unessential aspects of an unconscious nature. Playing with fire without knowledge gets one burned.

ben: I think I may be more prone to self-deception than most. I tend to answer my own questions, but even when the answers are technically accurate they do little more than serve to dismiss the question. Even these teachings (which I've seen are valid) are often made impotent in my own mind as they are supplied as answers by thought. When something real gets through, I know it, but mostly I only think I see. How can I break out of a circle I don't know I'm in?

GF: Your growing awareness of how parts of your present nature act to placate (you) without actually doing anything real to change you (your nature) will lead you to the end of that nature's influence (over you). Persist!

Lenny: I am such a hopeless case without these principles, and have a new hope now. I don't know this personally, but am reading (Ouspensky, Nicoll, etc.) about the unfortunate and disturbing fates that can become us if we do not succeed in our spiritual work. Now that I'm seeing what I'm up against, spiritually speaking, I feel a great worry for those who don't have the truth. Particularly, I feel concern for family and loved ones. What if they never find their way?

GF: Do your inner work and everyone has a chance that comes into contact with you!

VW: I seem to be caught up in a "catch-22" situation here. I have been working on quieting my mind (it seems like an awfully long time now) and have tried various techniques, but it looks to me that this is just "mind" trying to quiet the "mind." All my realizations feel like they are coming from the mind. It's like my mind somehow needs to be out of the picture for there to be any chance of my mind being out of the picture. How do I get out of this circle?

GF: This is a true observation and is, itself, part of the fruit of your work to know stillness. See more by daring more.

VW: Other traditions suggest celibacy. Is this because that energy that is used in sexual activity is needed to help one quiet the mind?

GF: The sex center, and its energy, is immense in its force -- for a dozen reasons; but as with such concerns there is an inherent danger for those who tread where they should not. Blind obedience to any discipline can destroy as easily as it might help create something new.

Nobody: Why does it hurt me so much when people do not behave as I would like them to?

GF: Unfortunately, our present sense of self is nothing more than a derivative of an image that we hold about ourselves that must be substantiated by those around us to remain in place. When others don't support this image by behaving the way we expect they should, the subsequent crash in us is because of a shock born in realizing that we are wrongly dependent upon others for our identity.

GF: Before we sign off tonight, I want to send along my remaining notes concerning the importance of our work in learning to develop real patience.

As we discussed earlier, until we understand and develop a patience born of true and higher self-knowledge, we cannot hope for anything approaching the calm contentment of a fully conscious life. Real patience has nothing to do with that familiar opposite of impatience we tolerate while waiting for what we want. Not wanting to show just how impatient we feel is not the same as being patient.

Real patience never feels like a punishment or an enforced morality; it is a pleasurable act born of consciously participating in the process of God's life as it unfolds within us moment-to-moment. Such patience is a natural feature of a life awakened to its real place and role in the cosmos; it is both seed and fruit of a faith that cannot be shaken.

To help us grow in the new understanding we need to realize this higher order of ourselves, and to give us a practical way to incorporate some of these higher ideas into our everyday lives, I have designed some special spiritual exercises. Following are five ways that we can work to develop real patience within ourselves:

1. We must develop the patience to let disturbances pass by without picking them up: This means we need to see that the reason we painfully resist any moment of life as it unfolds is that it runs contrary to our present notions of what we need to be happy and free. But the fact is, in spite of all our best ideas, we have never found this freedom from what pains us. Why? Each time we are drawn into a struggle with what disturbs us -- meaning that we become identified with it -- this struggle strengthens our conviction that our expectation is legitimate. How can the source of what sits behind our suffering liberate us from itself? It can't; but to practice the patience of letting disturbances pass by frees us from both our expectations and their pain.

2. We must develop the patience to be concerned with the character of our own consciousness before we attempt to make over the character of another: We are in everybody's life: Nobody walks by us -- not even strangers -- to whom we don't give a makeover in our minds. We unconsciously sit in judgment of all we meet. What causes this mechanical reaction in us? Our present nature is limited to knowing itself through what amounts to a constant considering of anyone (and everything) that it perceives to be different from itself. So, this false nature necessarily looks, as a rule, upon the manifestations of others as a disturbance, a disturbance that we don't know what to do with, except for trying to straighten out what has offended us. So, we must learn to patiently observe and consciously bear this part of our nature that gets negative when anyone or anything doesn't match its desire. We need to put this judgmental aspect of ourselves behind us, and that takes patiently learning to ignore its demands that others conform to our expectations. New freedom follows.

3. We must develop the patience to be kind to those who do not care for us as we believe they should: To be patient with an individual who does not care for us the way we believe they should means that we can no longer do and be someone who meets others with the expectation that unless they give us our proper due, we will have nothing to do with them. What kind of human being is that? This level of self-work takes rigorous self-examination, beginning with wondering why some people are seen as our foe. The answer is simple: They don't give us the deference we deserve. The unconscious nature that runs us through its resentments would prove, by the pain it produces in us, that others are wrong for being the way they are. Now we know that it is what has to go.

4. We must develop the patience to realize that we are not the only one who suffers: When we are suffering, we are sure that absolutely nobody else endures the kind of pain that we do. So, to consider the suffering of another human being almost never enters into our mind, unless it's self-serving in some way. Then we envision ourselves as a rescuing hero. On the other hand, we can learn to realize that whenever someone we know is angry or anxious, whose heart is aching, that he or she is suffering just as we do. This kind of higher self-awareness awakens compassion. And in this awakened state we are willing to be patient towards both that person in pain, as well as towards the pain in us that this same person has stimulated.

5. We must develop the patience to work for what is True until the truth in our work reveals itself to us: If all that a flower needs to bloom is given to it, how much more so must this be true when it comes to the spiritual education of a soul? If we have hope in things unseen, and work patiently for its fruition in us, how could it be that we wouldn't be given all that we need? Our task is to watch and wait; to do the work it takes to come to the end of that false nature within us under whose impatient influence we presently live. This dark nature is the soil out of which grows a level of self that is insatiable; whereas our True Self, and the true patience in which it is rooted, fulfill and perfect each other for all time.

Let us work to realize that long patience within us that we will need for the long run. Remember: Patient persistence in our labors, coupled with persistent patience throughout each one -- these two powers serve not only to perfect the task at hand, but also work in harmony to perfect the hand that undertakes the task.

That's all the time we have for tonight. Remember your wish to be free at all times, and then wait in a working patience to let the Truth do its work in you. See you next month on Thursday, October 2. Until then, persist! Good night to all.

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