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Shop eCoursesGF: Welcome to our chat tonight. Before we get going I would like to look at a certain psychological condition common to all seekers of Truth -- a pervasive and often punishing inner state we must either learn to use or end up being abused by it. I am speaking about being discontent -- its true nature, its purpose in existence, and our almost daily relationship with its onset in us.
It is no stretch of the imagination to say that many days most people wrestle with some form of discontentment about their lot in life. Add to this an equal if not greater amount of time spent searching for the solution they think will "cure" this confliction, and it might surprise us how pervasive runs this human pastime of trying to dodge these feelings of being discontent.
Let's look at a short list of suspects most commonly believed to be the stealers of our comfort. This will prove itself a helpful study. Serious students of the Higher Life should spend time observing their own discontented states because only the Light of conscious awareness can effectively change the unconscious cause of these unwanted patterns. One other point: Keep in mind during this review that the usual sorts of discontentment we experience in life, the various unwelcome visitors that conflict the mind while they sour the heart, are like a string of bees lining up to enter a hive one at a time. They cannot enter any other way. This knowledge will prove valuable for us as we learn about these stinging states.
But one should also know that it is possible for one's soul to be so habitually hardened by consistent resentment toward life -- for what he sees as its continual denial of his happiness -- that this same soul can become permanently displeased, chronically negative to the point of complete corruption. This destructive state leads to the soul's deconstruction.
Before we dive into our list of what are easily recognized as being common sources of daily discontentment, there is one last insight worth our consideration: Discontentment always makes perfect sense to the discontented! And again, later on in our study we will see exactly why this dark dynamic holds true, and us with it, in its web of deceit!
Depending on the day that breaks for us, we can experience any or all of these ten discontented conditions. Number one on our list strikes us when we first open our eyelids in the morning! Who wants to get out of a warm bed and face a cold world? The rest of this list is presented in no particular order, and is intended only to help illustrate the opening point of this study.
We often feel discontent over: (2) our assessment of our health or our level of available energy, (3) our inescapable responsibility to provide for ourselves or significant others, or (4) our physical appearance (being buff enough!). Other areas where we often feel discontent include: (5) our relationship with those at home or at work, and how others treat us there, (6) our own habitual behaviors beyond our strength to stop, (7) our possessions, or lack of them, (8) our inability to change or otherwise control someone near to us, (9) our uneventful past or unpromising future, or (10) our relationship with our God.
Apart from its detail, the overall purpose of this list is to help us see that much of our time we are engrossed in a struggle to identify the cause of our own discontented condition, followed by our subsequent efforts to change what is unwanted by us into what we believe will better suit our pleasure.
Of course this description puts a kind of "positive spin" on what amounts to one's never-ending whirl of wishes. But these hopes and dreams (of a more contented time to come) do not really belong to what we might think of as being our true Self. They are the incessant creation of one's own thought nature -- that ever-seeking, never-quite-satisfied self we all know too well!
This level of "self" knows only the kind of comfort that it imagines into being. And this, its imagined creation, is a construct created from the content of its own past experience. Knowledge of this psychological fact helps to free us from its influence over us. Here is one of the reasons why truth sets us free: This insight grants us the initial awareness of an unseen contradiction in the workings of our own consciousness. Can you see it yet? If this thought nature of ours, the "self" from which we presently live, possessed the contentment it imagines into being, then it would not have to spend all of its time conjuring up all of the comforting ideas it endlessly creates!
A closer look at this idea reveals there dwells a "self" within us that is always seeking to exchange what we are in the moment for its more idealized conception of what it imagines will make us happier. This malcontent nature is inseparable from the discontentment that it breeds as it drags us through its comparison of what "is" to its own imagined idealized state yet to be realized.
The truth is, this self is not just driven along by its discontent but, in fact, has no independent existence apart from it. It requires that something always be "wrong" in order for it to set things "right." In other words, the contentment this self seeks only exists for as long as does its sense of being discontent. And there is still more for us to see.
The lifespan of this discontented nature is the length of time it takes to hand you over to its opposite: the imagined pleasure that awaits you when you arrive at your imagined destination. But, as we know it to be true, we no sooner arrive at this chosen port of pleasure than appears again what is "not right" with where we are, and the cycle of discontentment starts again!
Once we awaken enough to see this cycle of discontentment for what it is, then we stand a chance of canceling it and the strain of living with what has always been an impossible contradiction in our consciousness: the vain hope that our discontentment can be answered by the very nature that creates and sustains it. Clearly a whole new order of solution is required.
At the close of our chat tonight we will look at the possibility of such a New Solution and what will be required of us to enact it. At the same time we will discuss a few other insights as they concern canceling this unconscious cycle of discontentment.
Now, let's begin with your questions and comments, but please work to remember that our task here on-line together is to address what is real and what leads us to authentic self-transformation. Let's talk over the issues you are working upon within yourself, which means let's not spend our time wandering through frivolous philosophical questions or otherwise imaginary religious ideas. What would you like to talk about tonight? Let's see what we can learn together.
Bev: So, if I am to be "content in whatsoever state I am in," then how do I know what decisions are right ones? In other words, aren't there some situations, relationships, etc. that are "better" for us than others, and how do we know which ones they are if we are working to be content with everything?
GF: You have missed the point. It isn't that one works to be content with everything. You might as well be a zucchini in a garden. What the opening essay points out is that there is in us a nature that knows only one kind of contentment at present that is the secret opposite of its own discontented findings with life in the moment. Real Contentment is the end of the influence of this nature that lives from the opposites.
Bev: I did understand the point, and I do some days feel like a zucchini. However, my question was more specifically: understanding that this discontented self exists, HOW then do we discern what situations are "right" ones for us and what ones we are discontent about for our own inner reasons?
GF: There is no such thing as knowing what you want to know in the way you want to. Try to see that whatever we mix fear into must make that mixture something we are discontent with BEFORE we even get started. Act as truly as you know how, with the best intention you have, and watch. The cake that is baked tells you the truth of its ingredients.
mabaowa: How in the world do you know when it is God working in your life and not that self? After beginning my study of truth I received a dream job and met and married a fine gentleman, or so I thought. I lost them both and they both used me in every way, shape, form, and fashion. I took so much because I was so certain that they were God-sent. How do you know when its God? Right now I am alone and don't want to re-enter the world.
GF: One of the most difficult things for us to do, but that we must if we would have a God-centered life, is realize that it is not God that sends psychopaths into our lives, but rather there is in us an unenlightened nature that cannot tell the difference as yet between what is healing or hurtful, between what will serve us and what will steal from us. Do not hide out. If you do, it is fear that constrains you and that will ultimately betray you by recreating the same pains again.
jill: I have noticed in my studies that I can spot phony people much sooner than I used to. Sometimes it only takes a couple times of talking to them. So if it helps anyone keep working on yourself and you will learn how to detect psychos.
GF: Yes, this is a benefit to our genuine self-work. The more we learn to see through our selves, the more easily we discern the false faces of others.
Bev: The more I see about how discontented I really am -- about everything -- the more the "voices" and the "committee" seem to scream about the things that are wrong. How do you keep the work of seeing how discontent we are separate from our becoming completely discontent about this sorry state?
GF: I spoke of this very thing last night in a talk about discouragement. If we really see our discontentment, and understand its cause, this understanding actually helps keep us from becoming wrongly interested in our own conflicted state. Don't look for shortcuts. Do not hope for the end of an ache. Let what is be what is, with your part being only its witnessing. This Light will change the contents in it versus content creating imagined light to save itself.
mast: I find that I can be more aware when I am alone or going for long walks, but I find witnessing very hard when I try to bring it in everyday problems of life. Could you give some ways to increase it in daily life?
GF: Yes. You must have the intention to keep your attention with you at all times wherever you go. This takes consistent, persistent effort. Take an hour for the purpose of just watching yourself under circumstances you usually go to sleep to yourself under, i.e., go to a mall -- not to shop, but to see. Go to a movie -- not to lose yourself, but to watch yourself. Find your own ways to put Truth before your habitual mental and emotional activity.
rousseau: You mentioned a "purpose" for discontentment. Could you share with me the purpose, so that I may react properly to my own daily feelings of discontentment?
GF: Discontentment in our lives serves the purpose of awakening us in the moment of its appearance to one of two things: First, that we are most likely serving some false purpose that even when completed leaves us discontent. Second, that there is a natural end to certain lines of thoughts and feelings and that discontentment is the herald of those moments in which we have completed the course available to us through those same limited thoughts and feelings.
Rael: A discontentment that has dogged me for thirty years is health. I injured my body at that time, and the pain has increased with the years until now it is debilitating. When the pain or fatigue increases, it is disheartening and hard to be content, let alone have energy for awareness. The pain and tension of injury seem to resonate with that of self-deceit.
GF: I hope this will help: I know such pain personally. I also can encourage you to find "the center" of this pain in you the next time it washes over you. Much of our valuable and necessary energy, including what is needed for the healing process, is literally wasted in unconscious resistance to our pain. Don't resist the pain. This can be done. Separate from the sufferer, not the suffering.
Janet: I take painkillers for pain. There are ways of controlling how we feel.
GF: We must, as challenging as it may seem at the outset, see the difference between "controlling" how we feel and the fact that these choices are being made for us by something within us that has taken control of us. The world we live in cannot wait to sell us whatever the next thing is to help us sublimate whatever suffering we are in. This sublimation is ultimately self-compromising and destructive. There is a way out. Seek it through Truth.
Rael: I see that I devote my questions to you trying to express my "frustration" at not being to attain any meaningful inner change. I also see that you cannot solve this frustration by an answer, yet I myself still see no answer.
GF: Believe it or not, this state you have reported is a mandatory condition along the Path. One must see beyond the shadow of a doubt that the answers the mind seeks are not the Answer needed. This doesn't mean such answers don't supply connections to greater understanding, only that this higher understanding is not a feature of thought. Stay the course. Stay close.
sassypat: My discontent seems to come on a moment to moment basis. This evening, Wheel of Fortune was replaced by a movie. I didnt get into the Chat room right away, and my grandson has obviously set my computer to print in red and he is not home to change it. One part of me laughs at this, but the other is really upset about it.
GF: Our lives are not intended to grow smaller, but do so because we stop risking what it takes to grow and learn what keeps us loose and naturally responsive. As we contract, it takes lesser and lesser things to make bigger and bigger ripples in the self.
mabaowa: How do you find real contentment? What does it feel like? What does it take? How often does it come?
GF: I'll tell you something beautiful: Real Contentment is a Visitor. It is a silent friend that enters the house prepared for its presence. It cannot be bought or timed or in any other way made to come to one. It follows Love. It waits for Love. And it comes without fail when one loves Truth/God more than one wants their present self and its circle of endless wants.
mast: You have said that all the disturbing thoughts of the past which haunt us are just those experiences which are not lived fully, and they come to surface again and again to claim their life. On the other hand you say that we should consciously refuse to go with such thoughts. Is this kind of refusal not suppression? Should we not let those thoughts come to surface and watch them, being a witness?
GF: We must be careful to be clear. It is not the thoughts of our own past that are the seed of experiences not lived fully. What returns to us in our recurring life-events are the reflections of ourselves, of unrealized parts of our own nature that surface to reveal themselves to us through our experience. It isn't a question of refusing thought. That is resistance. It's a question of recognizing relationship between the thought-nature and the world it brings to us.
debo: What can one do to end resistance? Force yourself to do what you know you have to do, or watch and wait for motivation?
GF: The only way resistance can end is when, through one's awareness of its cause, one is able to call upon a Will of a new order that rests outside of the mechanical will inherent in either resisting or being attracted to either one of the opposites in a pair. This New Will is what we are working to realize in this Work. It alone sits outside of whatever opposites presently constitute the captivity of one's consciousness in that moment.
straydog: When we set forth towards a goal that we think will benefit us, resistance pops up. How do we tell when that resistance is to be fought and defeated towards the goal, or the resistance is the Universe trying to tell us that that goal is off the Path?
GF: If you remember the "borgs" in the Star Trek movie, they repeatedly said: "Resistance is futile." When you understand that resistance to the disturbance is the disturbance, at that moment you will not have the same troubles you do now when you encounter "it" (resistance). No resistance exists without unseen opposites, and neither does the blocked self exist without this resistance.
Roy: In the context of "Instant Recovery," and attempting to drop my identification with a painful thought, I find it very difficult to distinguish between actually "dropping the sense of I" and "resisting the painful thought." There also seems to be a fear of loosing control that makes it even more difficult. Can you help with the specifics of the process of dropping this identification?
GF: Dropping the sense of "I" means that one is aware of that "I" and its conflict and the solution this set of opposites proffers, all at the same time. This in turn means that dropping our identification with a state means that it becomes something conscious to the "observing I" instead of the common "I" having its sense of self defined by that negative state.
Roy: So then, is the "I" doing the resisting of my painful thought defined by the painful or negative state itself? And if I see myself resisting this condition, then does it mean I am already identified with it and have lost the "observing I"?
GF: Any part of us that resists any other part is the secret opposite of the part resisted. One can see this resistance in motion, without identifying with its pain, even though the pain remains. Then that would be self-observation.
jaybird: Can you offer some clear guidelines on how to detect the connections between our unconscious inner thought patterns and our outward circumstances?
GF: Very much so. As a general exercise, and one I highly recommend, practice coming awake as often as possible and notice the relationship between what you are connected to interiorly and what your exterior experience is in that moment. Such an exercise will yield great insights for you.
jaybird: More and more, I am seeing clearly the way I walk in circles (psychologically, mentally and spiritually speaking) and end up in the same situations again and again. I know it's good to "see" this, but sense that just seeing isn't enough. What more must I do to break the mental chains?
GF: We have in us, unawakened, and yet so only as a potentiality, a certain aspect of our True Self. This quality or characteristic as it comes to the forefront of one's waking hours has in it something that I call "Spiritual Intolerance." This means that we have in us something that once it becomes conscious of what compromises us, it becomes intolerant of that state for us. Work harder to see more.
mabaowa: I have been living that cycle for the past several months. It is like watching myself in a movie and I can't stop the fruitless behavior or move on.
GF: Nevertheless, one must do what is in one's power, and if that means for the time being that all you can do is watch your own appetites drive you from pillar to post and then punish you for the journey they drove you to take, then so be it. Watch this. Don't excuse yourself. Don't blame others. Be ruthlessly honest. Do that and you will see a gradual ability to suffer this discontented nature out of existence.
Deepa: Does celibacy have anything to do with spirituality?
GF: It's not a clear-cut answer that can be given because everything depends upon the type of individual asking it and their present psycho-emotional state of being. There can be immense benefit in a celibate life, just as there can be havoc wreaked upon a person not prepared for the rigors of such a discipline.
Eric: Let's say that one day I make great progress because I work really hard on myself to see what I'm really like, but the next day I fall completely asleep. My question is, does my falling asleep cause me to lose whatever progress that I made on that first day, or do the Real gains that "I" make stay with me forever?
GF: Any real gain made by a sincere aspirant constitutes something having been "fixed" in his essence in such a way that the constituent parts have not the power to undo. This isn't to say that one can't lose what one has gained up until a certain point on the Path. For instance, outbursts of dark negative thoughts and feelings are highly disruptive and destructive to one's effort.
puppie: I have been dealing with a feeling that I do not belong in any human family since my divorce and because my biological family does not communicate with me. I find my discontentment comes from feeling like I do not belong with people and that the ones I love do not even seem to like me. Is it wrong to long for human connection and want more supportive intimate connection?
GF: Being alone is not a curse. If you are alone because your developing nature naturally repels others who, in their love of low things, do not want your company, then good riddance to them. If you are alone because you are unpleasant to be with, then thank these people for being a mirror for you. Only you can know the truth of yourself.
BarryF: If we're always looking into a mirror," and what we see is unpleasant, how does a change in what we see come about? I desperately want what I see to change! But it seems the more I endeavor to do my inner work, what I see doesn't change and/or gets even more dissatisfying.
GF: You're on the right track. Listen to this Truth: Don't try to change what you see in the "mirror." The self that wants to change what it sees ensures that it will continue seeing what needs changing. Our task is to welcome the Light and stand in its circle. It's the Light's job to handle the rest. Let the Light fight for you.
JayW: Lately I have been awakened to the Fact that this is God's World and that it is to my benefit to abandon my limited view for a more expanded view. When I am seeing Life as God's Life there is nothing that doesn't fit, and there is tremendous Peace. My limited ego view creates instant separation and suffering.
GF: No one can really let go until one sees he holds onto nothing real. Then there is the chance of ending the separation that self lives for and upon.
ADB: I'd like to think I've been (daily) doing the Work for over two years now and have made strides in many internal areas. What is coming up though now is that my spouse (negatively) views me as being "passive." Can a person be doing the Work and be non-reactive/explosive and appear "passive" to others? Any insights on this and addressing this with my wife?
GF: This is a fine line that one walks. There is a danger of one becoming apathetic through the wrong kind of withdrawal from their own negativity through an unseen resistance and hence fear of its expression. Pseudo-spiritual people walk around in this bland, passive, self-induced and imagined state of surrender. Real Work inwardly does create a certain kind of passivity to what formerly punished us, but even in this we are still highly alert and active. Hope this helps.
JayW: I am experiencing much confusion in a strange sort of way. I hear/read your work and it makes so much sense. Then I encounter another teaching that seems to not have the same foundation that you and VH and others have -- but these also make sense. Can you offer any guidelines on discernment?
GF: The best I can tell you for now is that one danger of the Path is the same as one of its benefits, and that is, namely, that Truth is fairly easily found in small portions and "golden" threads that run through many works of individuals at all levels of development. True discernment is gained only through "taste," and "taste" is experiential. We have in us a light that knows Light without fail. Our task is to awaken this light so that it may lead us through what parts of us now see as light, but is darkness.
mast: What is the connection between vegetarian diet and spirituality?
GF: There is no necessary connection between these two things. Again, everything depends upon type and the hopefully developing sensitivity of the individual as he goes through the prerequisite stages of his development. Having said this, dense or gross foods do tend to disturb the body and activate the mind beyond its need.
intuit33: Can one cancel karma by being aware? It seems I'm so stuck in the financial arena.
GF: Our mind, the way it presently works with its limited light, tends to see things like the idea of karma as being a separate and almost distinct issue from the content of our present and active consciousness. In truth, no such distinction exists. This Work does two things: First, it cancels the self that continues to create conditions that recur because one hasn't learned from them, and second, it doesn't change our past -- it releases us from it.
RobF: You have mentioned that certain life situations may force us to our knees in prayer to God. Would this result from intense suffering that one is undergoing? Or does this refer to a realization on our part that we cannot die to our thought nature no matter how hard we try?
GF: One day you will see that both of these things that you have said are as one and that may be what brings you to this True supplication to the Celestial.
hawkeye: I am having a difficult time getting started with the task of re-entering the job market. There is a fear that I can't seem to shake in making the first move. Is there any insight that might help?
GF: Yes, by all means. There is no such moment in the situation you have referred to that is the right moment to wait for. Leap! Jump! Act! Dare! Strive! Risk it! Don't worry over what might happen -- that's a recipe to insure nothing happens. Take action and watch for results. Let the results refine your next action, then start again. Keep Truth near you. You can't lose.
buddy: I was just reading about the differences between the left (primarily verbal/thought based), and right sides of the brain. This false, thought-based self that you talk about, could it possibly be located in the left brain, or could it be a function of the left brain?
GF: The false nature is not a creation of either left or right lobes of the brain. It is a creation of the opposites at work in the essential nature of the way thought knows itself only through considering an image created from its own content. The thought-self is endlessly separating itself in order to know what it sees -- the catch being of course that it can't ever "know" what it has separated itself from.
Janet: Communication is so important. Good communication is sometimes so difficult to keep up with in all types of relationships as different people are on different "wavelengths" and not everyone thinks alike.
GF: Yes, of course, that's true. One of the special benefits of this Work is that as we awaken a bit, we realize that we ourselves carry the complete wavelength in each of us and, therefore, in knowledge of this and in its experience we are capable of relating to virtually anyone around us. Good communication begins with Right Relationship.
Janet: People can change. I've known so many who have changed over the years... how about counting your blessings?
GF: Yes, people can change, but I will tell you a Truth that one day you will have to see for yourself: Real self-change, Real transformation in a person is more rare than the rarest flower found on this planet. People pretend to change and then suck needful believers into their vortex of viciousness. And talk about counting your blessings, knowing the Truth of these ideas will bring you Eternal Gratitude.
ADB: Any advice for a person "addicted" to various modes of visual stimulation? I know I get a sense of self from this, but this "need" does come from a place with powerful urges.
GF: Watch closely (as closely as you can) your own emotions while you watch what you are addicted to. If you will give at least half of your energy to this special attention in these moments, you will start to "see" within you a pain that has been hidden from you that is the secret source of this pleasure you are now driven to seek. I know what I tell you here. Work.
ADB Is this hidden pain only one that I have or is it common to all? If mine only, does it matter that I spend great time delving into discovering it's origin and how else it impacts my life?
GF: This pain is no ones exclusive property. It is the hidden opposite to the desire that we hate ourselves for having. It is the lust for this or that a pain which cannot be answered, only unconsciously served until seen through and dropped.
jill: So a pain within us seeks a pleasure to help relieve it from the pain, although we don't realize we are doing this? And the relief is only temporary?
GF: Exactly. Doesnt our own experience prove this very thing? See it!
cary: On page 236 of the Seeker's Guide to Self-Freedom, your answer to the second question was that we must let go of the wish to return to a moment glimpsed. Does this mean we can't remember either? It's comforting to do so.
GF: Yes, it means that we must realize the difference between the part of us that can only know what something was of a special nature by thinking back over it. The true Spiritual Life and the Grace that comes from our deepening relationship with God's Life is not only not repeatable, but it is undesirable once one understands that spiritual gifts are like water from a fountain once we stand in the right place.
steveb: Do you have an opinion you would share about the benefits and drawbacks of an AA type "12-step program"?
GF: We are each (if we're lucky) drawn to some level of help that rests just above whatever is presently compromising or otherwise limiting us. In the end, we must recognize that a program of any kind is inherently limited if we think that the possibilities available to us are outlined in known steps. It is our individual willingness to explore the truth of ourselves that releases the promise of ourselves. Let each of us start where we must.
needhelp: What is the "luck" you speak of in your last response?
GF: Like attracts like, and if one has a measure of Light within him, this Light will (at some point) be drawn to a source greater than its present capacity for expression.
Garosh: Are there limits to the "amount" of wisdom that a person can attain?
GF: There is absolutely no limit. Keep in mind this doesn't mean knowledge, but Wisdom. And what is Wisdom but Wholeness?
straydog: It is said that we are where we are to learn certain lessons before we move on. Are there certain things we can do to help find the Lessons within our current circumstance?
GF: You can't avoid the lessons in your circumstances. That's the problem. So many of us are always looking for what we think we need that we fail to see that this seeking self is what needs be seen and dropped. Then the lessons are like raindrops that soften the hardened soil of one's soul.
needhelp: Your last answer strikes a certain chord it brings something up to the surface just enough to confuse me more. Please explain!
GF: The solution to our suffering, our discontentment, cannot be found outside of the self that experiences life through its resistance to it. The purpose of experience is to bring us to the end of needing it to define us.
Janet: I have been grieving for the loss of several close relatives. How does one stop grieving?
GF: If you're sincere with your question, notice who is at the center of this continuing grief. If you're honest, you will see there is a very strong sense of "I" in your crying. Note that it is not wrong to grieve for loved ones lost; this is natural. But grief, like dark clouds, is intended to pass in a given time so that the Light may once again begin the process of healing and nurturing the world it shines upon.
danielaw: Grieving is accepting and allowing the detachment to take place. I suppose after the lesson "love", the lesson "letting go" is the second hardest allowing oneself to be with the grief until it has done its job.
GF: It is true that everything has its time, its season for coming and going, but we mustn't mistake the necessary seasonal changes our Soul is required to go through for the secret self-love that the false self loves to continue writing on the wall of what it calls its experience.
needhelp: Besides studying reality, I have an aching feeling that everything I do is futile. I don't know what to do with myself. For instance, if I am home, bored, and there's nothing on the TV, VH says to let these feelings overwhelm me, so then I feel that anything I go and do is wrong. I am confused.
GF: Mr. Howard never said let any feeling overwhelm us. Try to see the difference between being absorbed in a negative state and being fully aware of its punishing presence. In the latter state one suffers consciously the condition, and in the former state there is no self separate from the conflict and its ache. Stick with it. Ask God to show you what you need to see. Mean it. Answers come.
Rael: When I read esoteric literature, it is like looking into a mirror and I am, at that moment, able to use some kind of reflected light to see more clearly the dynamics of what is going on within. Yet when I turn again to the world, I can still observe the problems, but the answer eludes me. I enjoy reading those books, but wonder if I am missing something.
GF: You wouldn't read a book on how to master something like cooking and then never go into the kitchen! The only purpose, Real Purpose, of Truthful writings is to pass along principles for individuals to apply in their day-to-day lives. Without application, there is no experience. And without experience, there is no purification. And without purification, no elevation. See this and go to work.
ADB: Can you tell me if Krishnamurti and Maurice Nicoll were influential in your learning? And if so, how? I wonder if I could gain anything from delving into their works.
GF: I can unreservedly tell you that both of these men in their own way were great Lights in this darkened world of ours.
mast: Not only when I meditate, but also during moments of quietness, I hear a soft sound like that of distant waterfall. Sometimes it scares me and my mind becomes afraid to sit for more time. Kindly comment.
GF: Do not fear this. Sit through it. Open yourself up to it. This is a natural phenomenon.
jaybird: How might a person on the inner path "rejuvenate" when feeling "fatigued" and lacking the motivation to do the inner work that must be done?
GF: Clearly the answer cannot be to trust apathy to become a forward movement. Work through these naturally alternating stages. Start over each day with the wish for willingness. Back this wish up with some form of study -- be it book reading, tape listening, contemplation or mediation.
buddy: I am 27 years old, and still don't know "what I'm going to do with my life," though I do dabble in the arts, mostly music, and have over the years built up a bundle of lyrics (in rap/rhyme form) that all have to do with truth/breaking down mental and spiritual walls/searching for God, etc. I have been thinking that it might help people, especially adolescents and young adults, to hear positive rap out there, as there is so much negativity in rap and in popular music
GF: Sometimes ones way is not clear best to wait for guidance than blindly guide oneself, but do maintain yourself by some kind of work. Dont fall into the trap of being content with hating what you dont have (yet).
Dennis: When we die to our self and the suffering ends and we are at peace and in tune with all of life, what do we use to know ourselves when all the things we used before no longer serve their purpose? Does true choice no longer exist when we become one with creation?
GF: A winter insect knows nothing about the summer, so goes the old saying. Do the work needed to know the answers to these questions, as any other answer (I offer) will only give rise to more questions to choose from!
tomspeak: If I focus on any given task, sometimes I "lose myself" in it. Time becomes insignificant. You know the rest. Is the lesson not to get "lost in the moment"? Am I supposed to be paying attention to the doer or the doing? I remember reading somewhere to "watch the watcher."
GF: Learn to take natural come back to yourself breaks from this natural loss of your awareness to an engrossing task.
rlk: Is it best to stay away from people who choose the darkness over the light, even if they are family members? I can feel the darkness all around me when they enter the room.
GF: In a word: yes. But not before you have done what is in your power to show these others what they are doing to themselves. Be kind, but never enabling.
Diojeneez: "In whatever you do, remember your last days, and you will never sin." This comes from the book of Sirach. But, if this is true, why did Jesus die for our sins? Can't only the perfect be sinless?
GF: Jesus did not die for our sins. This whole idea is a misrepresentation of His Life created by those who must have others to judge in order for them to sit in judgment. Let perfection speak for itself. Any other answer is imperfect.
JayW: It's almost been one year since 9/11. Have you had further thoughts on this and how we can use the shock for our spiritual maturing?
GF: We must recognize the hand of death in the compulsive re-visitation of the past, and then dare to die to this part of us that needs what was in order to be.
danielaw: I just recently discovered your radically truthful messages, and "bravo" you on them sometimes maybe too wordy to hit right away yet powerful when they talk to you without detours. Was it your free will that chose to go this path, or do you feel you had no real choice than to allow to let something higher come through you?
GF: My interest began at a very young age, so I cant speak to this question.
Sjxi: Your books have been a blessing for me. Thank you! As I continue my inner exploration, perfectionism is a major issue.
GF: We must realize that anything we feel compelled to do cannot lead to freedom from this compulsion. Do struggle with your natural wish not to mindlessly serve the self (in you) that serves what punishes you. This right effort will bring you realizations that will release you.
kevinB: How is the list of names and states coming along? I am from South Jersey near Philadelphia and would like to connect with others nearby. Thanks for this great work.
GF: I believe this list is available for Tape Club members to help facilitate student interaction. Please e-mail Chris through our Homepage for details.
buddy: Recently, I've discovered that I seem (maybe) to be choosing sarcasm/anger/boredom over depression. I'm not sure if I'm correct on this. Since high school I've always had "problems with depression," (the parents and doctors said it's probably genetic), and still visit this state sometimes, but recently it occurred to me, while bored or ticked off or being obnoxious as all get-out, that these states might be a replacement for the tired old "depression." Does this sound possible?
GF: Yes, sublimation is a form of resistance, and what is pushed down or away can easily pop up in a variation of the theme. If you havent heard the tapes, get a copy of Secrets of Cleansing Heart, Mind, and Soul. These talks will help you through this stage. As always, if the tapes are not helpful, just return them to the Foundation for a full refund, no questions asked. You can order on-line from the Foundations web site.
mabaowa: What is most interesting to me is that people want my help, go through extremes to obtain my information. But they don't want to give me the positions and in relationships the respect. But they want my insight. I am tired of trying and truly want to develop my ideas and work from home -- limiting contact and hurt.
GF: We must never limit contact (with others) for fear of being hurt, because if we do, then we stay at home with fear itself and what could be more hurtful , or disrespectful to ourselves than that!
IGETIT: I was wondering have you ever heard of NEO-TECH? And if so, do you have any comments? I will really appreciate your comments.
GF: I have no idea about this. Be careful.
lady42: Is it possible that the trying, striving, and the "work" to wake up could just be another obstacle to the surrender needed to wake up to some higher level of awareness?
GF: Of course it can be, just as any image is never the thing itself.
needhelp: It seems the five minute break with the chathost, advertising and asking for donations is contradictory to your teachings. Please explain!
GF: There is no contradiction and I wont explain. If you think there is a way to host-free chats, keep a content-laden website with free Key Lessons up and running, produce and sell helpful products at minimal costs, and do all this (and more) without raising money in some way, come here and -- as an unpaid volunteer (as everyone here is) -- help us find the way to do it. We will welcome your energy.
jill: I have noticed that when I get involved with certain people, they are energy zappers, and my body seems to have this intuition that tells me these people are wrong for me by giving me a sick feeling. Even before I know the people I know they are wrong for me. What is this? I have learned through my spiritual work to trust this intuition, but it also confuses me.
GF: Follow this intuition. It confuses you only because to heed it means you will have to let go of some people you are identified with.
DebbieE: Recently I have noticed that responding to friends and their troubles is not as easy as it seemed before. I have trouble even coming up with something to say to them. I have to reread any letter I write, and when I go back the next day to read it again before sending it, I want to change it again. Can you suggest why this might be happening? My guess is I think most of what I have been thinking and saying for years is coming from something I no longer want to live.
GF: I couldnt have said it any better! Good for you.
daffey: Could you explain how to listen more attentively to the voice within that is, in retrospect, usually right (and we discover that fact after having not listened)?
GF: Practice going silent as often as possible. There is a certain Quiet in us that knows when to act, and what to act upon all without taking thought.
DaveB: Could you explain further the difference between knowledge and wisdom?
GF: Wisdom may express itself in thought while knowledge dwells only in the realm of thought.
FSE: Thanks for all your insights... if fear constrains and recreates the pain, how does one face the fear that may lead to the consequence of a more painful situation?
GF: See how negative imagination creates this conflict and then drop it. With the end of this imagined pain comes the end of the imagined consequences thought to bring it about.
t.l.: I get the feeling that every time I live outwardly, it's just the phony personality. I know enough to observe myself, but then I get another feeling that I shouldn't say anything if I know it's just the lower nature. Is the trick just to stick with self-observation?
GF: If we could learn to just watch ourselves without talking to ourselves about what we see, our inner progress would take the fast track.
MikeS: Sometimes when I meditate I start to feel huge, and it frightens me to stay there. I usually end up, out of fear, looking around and making sure I'm still "safe." Can you shed some light on this for me? I tend to stay away from meditation for periods of time as a result of this.
GF: These sensations are the result of certain energies moving through the brain. Fear not! Keep your wish for Gods Life before you and let go.
joekidd: I have what seems to be an "anti establishment" attitude. I see the common folly in almost everyone I meet through this understanding, but I need to see where I go wrong or take it too far, if I am at all. Please comment. I need to keep a job and function in real life and am afraid I will not be able to.
GF: All anti this or that parts of us are secretly just certain negative states that must have something to hate in order for that separative self to survive intact. Go to work. Dont compromise your beliefs, but dont let any part of you be a bully either.
tomspeak: Do we keep coming back until we get it right? I want out of this chaos. I want out of the self that wants out of this chaos. I want to see through this facade that I've created for myself so that I can see that there is no self. It seems to be unfolding gradually. I wonder one day if suddenly something grand will inhabit my life, a sudden burst of understanding or something. Does the unawakened keep coming back until Understanding happens?
GF: Our conscious persistence purifies us through conscious experience. Enlightenment is never-ending. What does get resolved is our resistance to the cost!
joekidd: I am having what seems to be serious resistance to diplomatic suggestions of these true ways of seeing that lead to real understanding from somebody I love, and it involves children. I may have to walk away after hoping and waiting for a very long time. How can I do this the best way for everyone?
GF: Such partings of the way are never easy, and you will have to walk this walk alone. One thing: set an aim not to act out any cruelty, nor give way to blame for anything. Remember: everyone is in pain, including yourself, so dont add to this by pretending anything to anyone, including yourself.
mg: In "Waking Up Together" you state that we do not exist except in relationship, and yet we also understand that we are complete unto ourselves it is already here in us if we awaken to it. I'm having trouble reconciling these ideas. The "crisis" comes from a desire to be in a relationship that is pure joy (for both of us) when we are together, but he doesn't make an effort to be together (which makes me feel sad/unworthy). This has led me to the understanding that the higher lesson in this pain is that I do not need another person with me, that I am "complete" without someone there (I think), and yet, we exist through relationship. Any light shed on my floundering would be greatly appreciated!
GF: What I said is that relationship comprises our existence be it with whatever level of energies (and their forms) comprise this relationship in us. And that is the key here. Our (sense of) self is determined by what we are in relationship with in the moment, and it doesnt matter if this relationship is with someone, or our thoughts about that someone when not with him, OR the relationship we have with a mind free of having to think about someone to lend us that sense of self. Not all relationships are visible.
GF: I need to send along my remaining notes regarding the spiritual solution for canceling out the dark effects of our discontented nature.
We can summarize our opening notes with a simple question that deserves our attention: Who in his or her right mind believes -- even for a moment -- that the path to one's lasting contentment would be paved by continually thinking about everything seen as missing from one's life? Such a path may promise pleasure to come, but its steps are spiked with discontentment. This finding proves our solution:
We have been the unwitting servants of a thought nature whose appetite is unappeasable because its life is fueled by opposites that cannot cancel each other anymore than picking up a sword can kill the fear in us that creates those whom we hate. This false self spends our life seeking relief from its own painful misperception of reality.
The clearer grows our understanding of our present condition, the more certain we become about what must be done: We must terminate our unconscious agreement with this unenlightened nature and, in doing so, consciously let go of our all-too-familiar sense of self that has been lent to us for our service to this false nature. How is this to be done?
Here is the True Solution to this pressing sense of discontentment and the self responsible for it: We must cease struggling to acquire more of those things in life that have already proven themselves powerless to please us. Instead we must do the inner work of deliberately detaching ourselves from this familiar sense of self that promises us comfort even as it continues to sow the seeds of our discontent.
Let me stress here that the work of letting go of one's self in these moments can only be as successful as one's insight into these truths now revealed. Here is why this must be so: We have learned that our principle source of discontented feelings is born in us when our thought self sees what "is not" happening in our lives as opposed to what it imagines "ought to be" taking place.
What we must see is that it is not we who create this constant comparison that is the root of our discontentment. This comparison process is the root of our thought nature that only knows what something is by knowing what it is not -- the opposites at work -- only they have been at work on us, dragging us into ever-deeper stages of feeling discontented with our life.
Enough is enough. We can and must learn to call upon a New "I" within us that understands the futility of continuing to vest ourselves in the "hope of things seen." So that now, instead of perpetually giving ourselves over to these discontented feelings with their promise of a better tomorrow, we are going to give these states away in order to gain possession of ourselves in the Now.
Which brings us to these last important notes: This act of conscious detachment is not an act of denial or resistance to the discontentment we may be feeling. It is a replacing of our attention upon the Truth we know -- a conscious shift of our sense of self away from what troubles it onto our new awareness that this self, along with its troubles and plans for freedom, is a lie.
Lastly, take this one thought with you into your battle to detach yourself from the discontented self: As difficult as it may be to grasp for now, consider the following insight to be true and then set out to prove it to yourself: Our God, the Creator of all things, whatever name you give to this Living Light, Himself created this seemingly unanswerable discontentment in us. Why would Goodness Itself give us such a mysterious gift, one so hard to grasp? Because only through our trials with being discontent could we ever come to see that there is only one True Source of Perfect Contentment: our life in God's. To this Perfect Plan add one last idea:
Only as each of us awakens to our actual condition in life, dominated as we are to one degree or another by a discontented self, can we ever hope to use our free will to give up our willfully discontented self in favor of a New and True Allegiance with what is Peace and Contentment Itself.
The initial knowledge you need to proceed and succeed with severing yourself from the discontented self is in your hands. Use these Truths you have learned to lead a whole new kind of life free from the lashing of a self that only lives for a contentment to come. You can do better than let bitterness over what you don't have become your god. Make the change right now!
Our time has run out. Don't forget to join us next month, Thursday, October third. Until then, remember your intention to detach yourself from any sense of self otherwise derived from its discontented considerations of life. Know that the contentment your heart longs for already dwells in you and only awaits your remembrance of Its Peace. Good night.
Guy's Monthly Chatroom Classroom - September 2002
Posted by Guy Finley in 459 Galice Road, Merlin, OR 97532 on , and updated on .
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