Growing is natural. Our bodies grow by themselves. Our psychologies change as well, mirroring the growth of our physical body. And as we grow physiologically, a psychology is necessary to adapt to the desires of our growing physical bodies. We tend to equate growing physically with psychological, spiritual growth. But what really takes place is, with the passage of time, our psychologies simply change what they are doing, and there is no real growth with the mere passage of time.
What we are really interested in is a change of "Being," and not simply a change of "doing." We have changed what we "do" millions of times, but if we're honest, we know that nothing has changed in any meaningful way. A real change of Being cannot be known, whereas a change in what we do is already known -- a reconfiguration of the past.
At a certain point in everyone's life, changes in what we are "doing" become ways in which we resist what happens to us. So our minds unconsciously dream up plans to "be" something different by "doing" something different. When this happens, the cart is in front of the horse. New being cannot be known by the individual who longs for it.
What you're about to "do" to change your being will not work. The do-er is what has undone you. Giving oneself up in the moment is the sacrifice of the do-er. This is a difficult task because it is ingrained in all of us to want to be someone different by "doing" something different. To lay down the do-er in favor of an unknown Being is to change your relationship with the moment.