I have listened to you Guy, now for years... and been inspired dramatically. When you speak to the wishes and dreams of our lives existing right here, right now in this very moment you do continue on to say something like "...I know this is difficult to comprehend..." It has occurred to me that you might address, in flexible order just exactly how that works, such as "You read what I say." You take it in, sort it out consciously, (as you attempt to understand...) and un-consciously (where truly the work is done). Once heard, one can trust the self, even direct the self to extract its essence, "nutrition", let it go...and over time, (thank-goodness for time, and space, for it governs the physical beings we are and the brain we wish to direct; passively, peacefully, gently, lovingly) allowing the digestion of material to operate within those natural constraints that DO exist right now in this very moment, in a physical body, within a material/physical reality, where we must allow the time and space for the natural unfurling of the rose; according to its' true nature, and genetic codes.
As a listener, and an applicant to concepts and teachings which you convey, first excitement occurs, as a new picture is delivered to my conscious mind... being human, and subject to the lack of understanding as to just "how it works," I then have "great expectations" for instant gratification... doomed to fall to the reality, that I have dishes to do at home, and other problems to address... "After the epiphany, come the dishes." So, not unlike a "drug-high" of a different reality --slam!-- back to the now... changed?? At the time this occurs, I can reflect upon what I have heard, and I attempt to implement what I think I have learned only to find that approach simply does not work. This is why I observe myself and others coming back, again and again, "addicted" to the need to hear more and more. This seems to occur not because of anything "bad" about your intent, or your intuitive understanding... quite to the contrary... your work is incredibly beautiful... I believe in the addressing of exactly "how it works in you" and the sharing of this information may foster an independence to the individual, wherein eventually they can do it on their own, and even help others become independent of the need to attach themselves to a person, or a person's specific concepts... out of word space... so good-day! (Student correspondence, 11/28/06)
All is well, as you will see. That said, there is too much to try and explain in an email concerning your questions, if it were even possible. But I would like you to ponder the following thoughts as it may bring some needed consolation to your soul.
Think of the words saturation and maturation. The mind in its usual faculty wants to "know" -- to possess the powers it imagines (and feels) when it hears of its occult capacity to transform and transcend itself.
The problem, and hence the sense of "the thrill is gone, where do I get it again?" is that this level of mind is a stepping stone, not the foundation itself of the Light we wish to have possess us.
The difference between these two perceptions is vital in our willingness to continue through various "dark nights" of the soul. For we must somehow grasp -- intuit -- that first we do our part; we study new ideas, see their potential, apply them, watch and discover what comes of that. And then we start over. But, the real work is not being done by us. Our efforts, our innate desire to live in the Light, to have its Life "born" within us, allows -- induces, somehow -- a certain kind of maturity in the mind whereby it begins to see its own limitations. Slowly we experience a maturing, a releasing of desire, and in some strange and miraculous proportion to this development, we are -- ourselves -- released.