Talk Takeaways
Independence is innocence. When a person is truly independent, he or she is rooted in an incorruptible nature that seeks nothing outside of itself.
An act of true kindness can't be disturbed. An act of true kindness does not place any demands upon the recipient of that kindness. Kindness does not look for confirmation or validation.
The nature that is not aware of itself depends on conditions and people outside of itself to confirm its sense of self.
The medicine is bitter but it heals. In the light of new awareness, we see something that has been concealed our entire lives.
A nature that remains concealed cannot be healed. Healing is the act of being released from identification with a nature that is the embodiment of dependency.
A co-dependent relationship is one in which one party is giving something in order to get something in return.
Blame is proof of a contract that we did not know we had signed. When someone breaks the contract, we feel threatened and resent that person in order to prove to ourselves that we are right to blame them.
Before we can be in any form of co-dependent relationship with another person or thing, we are first in a co-dependent relationship with our own consciousness. That consciousness then gives birth to every other kind of outward co-dependent relationship.
The unconscious self sabotages itself every time it tries to save itself.
The co-dependent nature feels threatened whenever life or other people do not confirm what it believes itself to be.
What you depend upon outside of yourself is not separate from the sense of self that depends upon it.
An addict does not change until he realizes that he is powerless to free himself from what he is addicted to. It is at that point that the real work of spiritual separation starts.
Unseen dependency is at the root of the feeling of anxious urgency. The more the sense of urgency, the more real that self feels.
We can get to know and understand the co-dependent nature within us because it leaves fingerprints, such as: any sense of painful urgency to control something; the feeling of being misunderstood; any suffering over others failing to properly appreciate you; any painful resistance to a sudden sense of loss.
There is never any urgency in what is Divine. When you see something true about yourself, there is no urgency.
When you feel the painful inner pressure, instead of habitually accepting its objective, replace it with an intention of your own: please help me see the real source of this fear, anxiety and pressure; and stand as still as possible in the light of that new wish. Your willingness to endure the truth is the beginning of the end of your complicity with this co-dependent nature.
Key Lesson 
