As we're about to discover, the little phrase, "I see myself," describes a single action that has the power to change the heart of whoever is willing to embrace its practice. But, before we examine the exercise, let's take a closer look at what it means to "see ourselves" - as we are - especially when our partner has failed to please us.

To begin with, it's impossible to see ourselves - as we are - when all we can see before us is someone else who's to blame for a feeling that we don't want. The truth is, at least for now, we can't see anything at all about ourselves when we're in the heat of a disagreement with anyone, even if it is with someone we love.

We can't see our own flashing eyes, because all they're capable of looking at is who to blame for the heat rising up behind them.

We don't hear the defiant tone in our voice because it's being drowned out by the voices in our head, justifying our right to be angry, disappointed, resentful, or otherwise upset.

And we've almost no sense at all of these mounting pressures in us, because we've been rendered numb by the drumming of these unconscious forces as they seek, and always seem to find - in our partner - a reason for being so disturbed.

To see the truth of the above is to understand how important it is for us to be as fully mindful as possible in the midst of a disagreement with our partner. We need to be completely present to whatever is coming up and out of us - not only aware of the kind of thoughts and feelings coursing through us, but equally sensitive to the kind of energy we can intuit is accountable for their appearance.

Now, let's see why our willingness to enter into this healing space called I see myself empowers us - on the spot - to realize the possibility of a whole new and higher relationship with our partner, starting with this: "Seeing myself as I am" allows me to see what you're looking at, at the same time!

When was the last time, in the middle of a fight with anyone, you came to a stop and silently, deliberately asked yourself this question: "I wonder what it's like for you to be experiencing me, as I am, right now?" The conscious choice to see ourselves as we are in the midst of any struggle with another human being changes us and, in turn, everything about that moment.

We must not wait to start our practice; the truth is that every moment is the right moment to see ourselves as we are... regardless of whoever may be our "partner" of the moment.

Maybe it's the person in that long line with us, complaining about how slowly things are moving. There's no better time to practice seeing yourself as you are than when some part of you can't wait to "pounce" on the impatience of someone else. How about being stuck behind a driver on the freeway who won't speed up or get out of the way? Practice seeing yourself as you are and "arrest" that part of yourself that's always rushing somewhere, resisting everyone and anything in its way!

The more places we'll employ this interior practice, the sooner we will find ourselves living from a higher level of Self that cannot be made to turn against anyone, let alone the ones we love. You've heard the expression "Practice makes perfect." Seeing ourselves as we are is love in action because it's the same as consciously illuminating those lower, unconscious levels of self that stand in the way of all that is kind, caring, and compassionate.