ED: Hello. I'm Dr. Ellen Dickstein. Welcome to a "Fireside Chat" with bestselling inner-life author, Guy Finley. Today I thought we would talk about a bad habit that many people have, including myself, and that is comparison. We compare ourselves to other people, we compare ourselves to an image we have of the way we should be, we compare an event with other events it's just endless. A great...

When we are dominated by any negativity, be it some consuming fear or heated anger, we may think we are in command of ourselves as we rush to judgment or lash out at the world, but a simple question reveals another reality. Who, in his or her right mind, purposely sets themselves on fire? The answer is obvious. No one deliberately defeats one's own best self-interests. This much we all realize...

Topics covered: When self-criticism turns to judgment it blocks revelation; The purpose of union is to give birth to something, but in order for there to be a birth there must first be a death; To remember in the midst of difficult circumstances that to love is what matters most of all is everything; Hatred doesn't exist without denial; The beginning of conscience is the willingness to observe...

Topics covered: Conscious pain is sensitivity, unconscious pain makes you a dullard; We have pain with other people because we're afraid of consequence; You're being manipulated inwardly; Do the best you know to do and then drop any afterthoughts about it; Discouragement is the shadow of self-judgment; Meaning is the integrated story of mind, body, and heart...

The rush to judge some character flaw in another human being is one and the same as the speed with which the false self races to hide from itself a similar imperfection.

No one can continue to mistreat you in the painful manner they do without you having granted them the license to do so. And, just for the record, this (same fact) also applies to any form of suffering born of judging yourself.

Classroom Talk: 10/11/2023 - Part 1: We can't hope to change what comes out of any given moment until we change the one within whom it appears. Part 2: The task is not to be perfect as imagined, an illusion supported by the pain of unrelenting self-judgment; rather the real task is to do the interior work of seeing ourselves as perfectly as we can regardless of how much we would rather not.

The missing spiritual key -- needed to forgive those who have hurt us -- is found in our own awakening wish to be forgiven for having been deceived, and then seduced into believing there could ever be a valid reason for hating anyone.

Classroom Talk: 11/23/2022 - No one has freedom of speech who -- for fear of being isolated, cast out and left alone -- feels unable to speak the truth they would, or to question what they see as false. And how much more so does the above hold true when it comes to the freedom to see oneself as one is... without endless self-judgment, and all of its painful justification...

Topics covered: Ebb and flow of the work; Using something that has been stolen from you to discover something that can't be stolen; An order of being that can't be diminished; Uncovering what is hidden; Nothing will remain hidden; Self-judgment; Letting go of the old; Natural reactions vs. identification; We can't stop the reaction; The reaction is never personal, but it belongs to a person...

Our willingness to teach for the purpose of learning is every bit as important as is our willingness to learn what we must in order to grow.

We can't hope to change what comes out of any given moment until we change the one within whom it appears.