One way to measure your own fears is to count the number of personal questions you've allowed others to answer for you.
Comments (0)
4 Views
Drop the Burden of False Responsibility
- Posted: Monday, July 14, 2014
- 530 words
Key Lesson
Summary
We want things to change. This wish, in itself, is like believing that being anxious about whether the sun rises or not will help it to do so. Life is change. But we also want it to get better, which means to change according to our own notions of success. So, we try to control what happens, believing that the tension this causes between life and our ideas about it is what it means to feel responsible. There is something misplaced in this mixture of life and our longings that grows unseen. The reason we strain as we do to carry this daily load is because we believe it is what's required of us to create a real self.
However, for all our struggle, no permanent self appears; only a kind of peculiar suffering manifests itself again and again, giving us an unwanted sense that its permanence may be all there is to life. The only self that finds this sad state of affairs to its liking is an intimate enemy . . . because its idea of permanence means having something to struggle with permanently! When we try to change life in response to the prodding of this false self, the results are self-formational.
All self-formational changes are awkward and temporary at best, because they are not rooted in reality. The struggle we undergo to bring them about is not only painful in itself, but causes additional suffering, as when our false sense of responsibility causes us not only to interfere with our own lives, but with those of others around us. Wrongly believing that the way someone else behaves is our responsibility not only makes us suffer, but that person as well when we try to meddle with his or her life. Our growing awareness of our mistake causes us to become disenchanted with the self-formational approach to living, and we begin to seek the transformational life instead.
Wouldn't you like to just let go? To release once and for all that recurring feeling that you're just not making it? Or, how about the weight of fearing what others think of you? Your concern for the future? Wouldn't it be wonderful to just drop the burden of feeling responsible for the outcome of every event? To just walk away? Yes. It is possible to live this lightly.
As we recognize the futility of trying to force ourselves and our lives into what we think they should be, we also begin to understand that all of our suffering for what we perceive as "coming up short" in life is self-inflicted. What we once mistook for being responsible to our future now shows itself to be only an unconscious punishment in the present. Our findings don't mean that we don't take necessary practical actions for our well-being, or that we are not decent to others. It means that we let go of feeling responsible for the future as though we must control its outcome. We realize that there is no way that our painful concern can positively affect any outcome, so we drop that concern. Bit by bit, we begin to hear what real life has been trying to tell us all along.
Excerpted From: The Intimate Enemy: Winning the War Within Yourself pages 101-104
- Topics:
- Responsibility
- Freedom
- Painful Patterns
This Material was Excerpted From:
Related Products
-
The Intimate Enemy: Winning the War Within Yourself
<p><strong>Learn the secrets of how to let go of what has been holding you down in life. </strong>Consider what you usually think of as being the cause of pain or dissatisfaction in your life. Maybe a betraying friend, shaky finances, a difficult workplace, or perhaps a past issue that still punishes you? And why it is that with all you've done to shake this suffering...</p>
Starting at $5.99
-
Life is Real Only When You Are
<p><strong>Explore and realize the limitless possibilities of your True Self.</strong> We all seek the same thing: to know the truth of ourselves, the depths of a love not yet sounded, and the heights to which our own thoughts can carry us. We seek a freedom unbounded, the fearlessness of immortality, the touch of the Divine. This is a special kind of wisdom that few will ever find. But you can rea...</p>
Starting at $14.95
-
Stop Being Afraid Once and For All
<p>Fear has a secret weakness... Discover that weakness and you'll know how to kick fear out of your life for good. In this program from Guy Finley, you're going to learn what that weakness is. Even better, you'll learn how to face ANY fear in the right way, so that its power over you fades away....</p>
Starting at $3.99
-
Relationship Magic: Waking Up Together
Nothing makes us ask tougher questions of ourselves than do our relationships with others, especially in those unsteady moments with someone we care for. Relationship Magic offers the knowledge and actions you need to build the kind of relationship very few men and women ever experience; one that is never stagnant, but always fresh, spontaneous, affectionate -- and above all, truly loving.
Starting at $5.99
-
Freedom From the Ties That Bind
Think for a moment what your life would be like if you lived in a world where reality and your happiness were one and the same -- where everything that happened in your life was always just what you wanted. Imagine it! No event, no condition could do anything but contribute to your well-being. Every day, everyone and everything would work in your favor. And since your contentment in this new...
Starting at $9.99
-
Wisdom's Path to the Happiness Within: Making New Choices, Seeing Real Changes
Sit face-to-face with Guy Finley as he imparts the wisdom of the ages. That's how you'll feel when you watch the remarkable DVD album, Wisdom's Path to the Happiness Within. Just pop a DVD into your computer or DVD player, sit back, and be transported into a living-room like atmosphere. You'll see Guy speaking right to you as he tells you the stories that...
Starting at $24.95
-
Seeker's Guide to Self-Freedom: Truths for Living
There's a reason why we all love stories about ancient maps, sunken ships, and buried treasure. It's because these tales reflect a deep sensing we all have: that a hidden treasure actually dwells within us -- and if we could just find the way to discover it, our lives would shine every day with life's greatest wealth: the golden qualities of true confidence, unbounded energy, unfailing wisdom...
Starting at $5.99
Drop the Burden of False Responsibility
Posted by Guy Finley in 459 Galice Road, Merlin, OR 97532 on , and updated on .
Get Guy Finley’s Bestselling eBook for FREE!
Freedom from the Ties that Bind
Simply by Joining Our Newsletter List!