GF: Welcome everyone. Let me open our meeting with some thoughts about what is required of us if we would realize a more awakened life. We will discuss some of these truths now, and just before the end of the chat I will lay out a set of easy-to-understand personal exercises that you can work with on a daily basis.

Now, let's begin at the beginning with an important point that ought to be more obvious to us than it is (at present): Consider for a moment a simple rosebush, or any tree or plant that blooms and fruits. Have you ever wondered at the miracle of a flower? From where does it come? What creates its delicate, fragrant petals, or in the case of a peach tree, the delicate and sweet tasting flesh of its fruit?

Think about these questions while you recall that these sweet and scented gifts of nature are the manifestations of nothing more than earth, water, and sunlight. And if you ever tasted any of these separate elements then you know there is nothing in them to account for this miracle of elemental transformation. But here's the point of these introductory remarks:

In exactly the same way that the fruit tree or the rose bush produces its crowning form -- and is given all that it needs in order to accomplish this miracle of life -- so too is everything provided for you and me to succeed in the flowering of our spiritual life. How could we be given less to succeed in fulfilling the purpose of our life than the tree or the rose?

Most of us never realize our true spiritual potential because we are too busy running around, trying to figure out how to flower! And the more a human being tries to flower by achieving the culturally, socially mandated dictums of success, the more thorns he or she grows. We say we want to be different, to be transformed, yet for our busy-ness no real flowering, no new fragrance is known.

To flower does not mean to momentarily feel spiritually good about ourselves. To have the fragrance of Truth in our life has nothing to do with being adept at spiritual sayings or the ability to impress others with our imagined grace. Spiritual flowering and fragrance means that we have with us, wherever we go, all that we need to be content.

This contentment is born out of the relationship that only Real Life has the power to grant us, that we have awakened into, and that for this awakening we are allowed to be compassionate, kind, and true. Only then do we stop hurting others in the name of achieving what we think we must have in order to feel ourselves a success in the way we envision it.

In this world, what we think of as the moment of our flowering comes in those times when things go right, or somebody says something nice to us, or the news is whatever it is that we've hoped for. In that moment we feel ourselves rising on the tide of these expectations now being fulfilled because events have occurred allowing this to happen.

But this level of life, one that is lifted by the events in the world, is the exact same level of life that crashes when the winds change. And as long as we believe that favorable conditions of life are required to line up so we can feel successful, we will spend the rest of our lives trying to control everyone and everything around us; and these actions are the bitter fruit of fear.

The flowering of spiritual understanding is the same as learning to live in a Higher world. And in our awareness of this higher life we are given everything: there is a fountain of new impressions, a flood of life-force. By a new kind of light breaking loose in us we see within ourselves all that must be done to succeed in fulfilling our life purpose.

And so, just as it is given to the rose or the tree, all that we need is also given to us; Real Life is pouring into each of us right now. Here is all this perfectly abundant energy and what happens to it? It's thrown away, wasted. And just as a flower fails to bloom that has been cut off from the elements it needs to blossom, most human beings wilt for this wastage of their vital forces.

Instead of allowing our hope for a real life to be stolen from us by our unconscious involvement in what is stealing our life force, we must make a new action; we need to go to work inwardly and begin to catch all the ways in which certain parts of us are throwing away our chance to awaken.

Just before the end of our chat tonight I will give you a list of "12 Ways We Waste Our Vital Life Forces." Once we can see where we squander what we need to succeed in our wish for the Higher Life, nothing can interfere with our awakening to that same New World within us.

What do you feel like discussing tonight? What have you been working on within yourself, and how can we use this time together to grow in greater self-understanding? Remember, the more your questions are able to reflect the real discoveries you are making through your inner work, the more valuable this chat will be for everyone involved. What's on your mind?

ruthann: Is accepting all circumstances without judgment part of the process that you are discussing? Our expectations and desires seem to cause the most problems.

GF: In the end, we must see that all things in us that judge any condition in our life are themselves always reactions to the condition they judge. What this means is that the "I" that sits in judgement is nothing more than one's own past brought forward to act as a discerning power. Our past, by its very nature, judges not only the condition, but judges us as well at the same moment. The reason being for this is that each time we draw upon who we have been to know what to do, we are automatically held captive in the closed circle of our own consciousness.

Bonj: I appreciate your flower analogy. Can you explain what it means when a person loves to grow thorns? Do we purposefully hurt ourselves with our own thorns? This is hard for me to understand.

GF: It is hard for us to actually understand that there is within us a nature that cares not in the smallest way for what it does to us in exchange for the sense of self that it lends us as it drags us through its considerations. An example: One is sitting at home and thinks of a friend who betrayed him in high school: first just the thought, then comes a trail of associations, all brought up from a memory operating under its own power, calling upon relative negative emotions to sustain its push into the mind. That nature loves the negative state it actually creates, even as one may feel himself saying, "I wish I wasn't suffering from this recurring nightmare."

Bill: I'm in the midst of looking for a new home for my fiancée and myself, which I suppose could be thought of as trying to figure out how to flower. It is stressful at times and the choices are hard to make. In what spirit should one go about an endeavor like that?

GF: Everything depends on what a person is living for. If the only way we know ourselves is by the objects and possessions we surround ourselves with, then you can see how painful it would have to be to be looking for a new place to live. Under those conditions, one feels as though their very life depends upon finding the "perfect" place. If we want a life in God, in Truth, then it matters very little what we have or surround ourselves with, because our lives are being redirected to an interior world where perfection is not a condition to be sought after, but a state of higher consciousness.

augus: I spent a few years reading your books and Vernon Howard's, but about a year ago I started reading the "Commentaries" by Maurice Nicoll. Now I find myself absorbed in his "Commentaries" to the exclusion of everyone else. Is this a story you've heard before? As you know, it's hard to ride two horses at one time. Would you advise me to also include more reading of your works and of Vernon Howard's?

GF: You must understand that True understanding is in scale. What this means is that there is knowledge that one can take from books -- and to that end, Nicoll did indeed leave a brilliant legacy -- but for the individual sincerely interested in awakening, the knowledge taken from books (any books) is severely limited. There is an ancient saying that it takes a lighted candle to light a candle. It's been around as long as it has because it's true.

augus: I am doing this work on my own. The people I work with don't know I'm trying to do this work. With them (along with my family members) I am doing the second line of work. Is this enough, or do I have to join a Fourth Way group?

GF: I would never suggest to anyone arbitrarily finding a group to join simply because they call themselves this or that line of any work. There are very few True sources out there. In the meantime, continue your work the best you understand it with your family as you've described. Try to plan a visit out here to Oregon at the Life of Learning Foundation. You will find much food here.

Jilli: If I am doing the Work and don't have the opportunity to be at a foundation amongst other spiritual students, does that mean I can't grow as much as a student who is surrounded by truth?

GF: One must always remember one thing: This work, since time began, is about an individual's relationship with the Light of a Living Truth. It is that Light and Truth that determines what one receives from it, not what one insists or dreams they can otherwise acquire, regardless of their surroundings. Having said this, it is a great benefit to be in the atmosphere that a True working group provides, because within it there is not just knowledge available, but special conditions are provided for under which one's knowledge of the Truth is both tested and purified.

nadine: I find it so easy to obsessively fixate on "easy pleasures" like the joy of eating, for example. It seems like I have to use will to look beyond this fixated energy. This seems dependent on my own state of mind/sincerity of the moment. So, does daily "working at it" help to slowly ease it away? Why do I cling to passing pleasures as if this will finally make me happy... when I know intellectually that this is untrue?

GF: The work you are doing as you have described it is valuable, but only part of the puzzle. The sleeping human being lives with a "hole" in his or her soul. This hole is a certain sense of being incomplete that always finds from our own past what it says we need in that moment to fill it. This hole is actually a set of unseen opposites that we must become conscious of to be free of what they drive us to in order to satisfy their essential insatiability.

nadine: I see the insatiability you mentioned coming from "the hole in the soul." I would really like it if you could explain further about this set of opposite forces that perpetuates this cycle.

GF: If you will go to the "Audio Tapes" page in our Book Store (on our website), there is a talk there entitled, "Let God Give You the End of All Your Wants" -- tape 238. This will provide valuable insight into what we've discussed. If you don't find help in it, you may return it with no questions for a full refund.

Leslie: Is my belief that Jesus is the Son of God -- and that He died on the cross to save us from sin -- going to limit me, in your opinion?

GF: In the long run, in the True Life of an individual who seeks to live in this Living Light that is often referred to as the Christ, there does come a time when all images and beliefs become self-limiting. The reason for this is that the spirit-filled life is not apart from the spirit that it is filled with. And, while we may for awhile have to relate to higher life through ideas and beliefs, the day must come -- and it will if we're sincere in our wish -- when we set aside "childish things."

Leslie: Are you referring to my belief in Jesus being the Son of God when you say we need to "set aside childish things"?

GF: No, I am referring to any beliefs that we must call upon in order to feel at peace within ourselves. Think for a moment what this means instead of throwing it away. As long as any relationship we have with God, with the Christ, depends upon anything conditional, to that extent we are ourselves subject to fear of loss. The moment conditions change or someone challenges the sense of peace we have derived from that belief, we are thrown into a negative or stressful state. Christ's life, the True Light, doesn't need anyone to believe in it, any more than you have to believe in the sun above you in order to receive its healing warmth and light.

Jilli: Does the Work enter your dreams? Lately I've had dreams in which I am self-aware of negative states.

GF: Yes, there's no question that at certain stages in a person's development, the interior work to be done is no longer limited to one's "waking hours." In fact, you would be surprised how rich the so-called invisible world is with all of the various lessons and teachers that we need to continue our development. Persist with your work and you will watch as increasingly you are guided in both worlds.

mikejb35: I too have had some dreams lately, but not the good kind. It seems that the evil forces are really going to work on me at night, not giving me a moment's rest. Any suggestions?

GF: First, I want you to understand that if you are sincerely working upon yourself, that no dark night -- regardless of what is dredged up in it -- has an ounce of power to keep you from realizing the truth of yourself. When you lay down tonight, meditate yourself to sleep the best you can and unemotionally, when you are quiet, say to yourself, "I wish to be protected while I sleep." Direct this to God as you understand Him and you will sleep better.

mikejb35: In my waking moments, I see so many lies around that it too is like a nightmare. I feel as though everything is crashing about me. Any suggestions about this?

GF: Yes, let everything fall apart. The self that wants to control the world around it projects positive outcomes, but does so from a secret base of fear that nothing will work out. Let the world that this self projects be detected and dropped, and God will see that you receive a new home that is genuinely unshakeable.

Slick: Every night I have a recurring dream about two guys I knew in high school. Is this dream just nonsense coming out of memory, or is it trying to tell me something about myself?

GF: There are really three orders to dreams. For now it's enough to say that most dreams for most people are just recycled garbage pushing its way back into the mind for reasons known only to whatever unconscious associations or impressions befell that person during the day. Other dreams provide us with a window into ourselves when we realize all characters and conditions in the dream are merely uninvestigated expressions of our own sleeping mind.

cyk1: How can we learn more about the dreams we have? I have many vivid, sometimes unexplainable dreams that can't be attributed to past thought or occurrences.

GF: How does one make discoveries about anything that he or she is drawn to? Enter the world you wish to explore. Start where you are, with what you can.

Barry: How does one stay awake, so to speak, in the dream world of sleep? A major part of our life is spent sleeping in bed.

GF: As you awaken to yourself in this world, the energies that permit this new consciousness begin to "work" their way into subtler places in the structure of self.

Right-Now: You have discussed many times about our thought nature having its own agenda so to speak. Does that mean that there is an intelligence behind it that we are unaware of?

GF: You may be sure of your question. Within all of us there is a continual upwelling of certain unconscious, dark energies whose very passage through the psychic system stimulates the intellectual and emotional centers. As these movements are registered, our own conditioned thoughts and feelings wrap themselves around these states, and not only tell us the nature of these states, but define us by them at the same time.

Slick: I experience crippling anxiety and am unable to take practical action. How can I get past this terrible place?

GF: Do the best you can to see the following: The energy of anxiety is really only half the story behind the suffering you describe. These states in their various forms appear within us. What is in our power is to withdraw our attention from these negative states wherein we are instantly resisting the conflicted condition, so that we bring an end to our own identification with what amounts to our reaction to our own negative reaction to these states. Ponder this is and you will get help in letting go.

james: I am often troubled by strong feelings of nostalgia. The focus of the nostalgia can be anything, such as some traveling I have done, a person I met (or even ridiculously, have not met). My mind just goes to these places without warning and always leaves me with heavy, longing, sad feelings. Can you help me understand please?

GF: Our present level of self only knows itself through the sensations it gives to itself as it considers images that it generates within itself. What this means is that one's mind will drag up an idea or an image of someone or something, and in the instant that it does, appears with it a certain sense of our self that now longs to know more about that image. This is where imagination kicks in and we supply ourselves with all manner of sensations, nostalgic reactions notwithstanding. It's all an illusion, and can be seen as such once one awakens to the process by which these thoughts steal one's life in exchange for a sensation of living.

seeker: Is it possible to be perfect, or is this the wrong question?

GF: Until we can understand that when we think of the idea of perfection, we always approach it through something imagined, then we will never realize the inherent limitation in any and all such images, as they are always expressions of a mind limited by thought and time. It is when we finally expire, not the wish to be perfect, but the self that seeks this perfection through its own estimations of how to reach it, that we begin at last to know something of our own original nature that lives in a world unaffected by the limitations of trying to assess itself by measuring "this against that."

james: Why do I feel the need to impress certain people I meet?

GF: All forms of desire to impress others are rooted in a secret form of fear that floods the mind when thought tries to measure itself by evaluating others. Until a person recognizes two things, they will never be free of this fear and that compulsive need to win approval. First, no one on this earth has the power to grant you the peace your heart longs for. No one! Second, and to the same point, the people that you wish to impress so that they will like you, secretly cannot stand themselves. And when you see this, you will begin to be free of wanting anything from anyone.

Jilli: Does an aim have multi purposes? If I have an aim one day not to express negativity, I not only see how hard it is not to be negative, but it seems to show me many negative states. It seems if I don't have that aim, I don't notice as much.

GF: One must have an aim, moment-to-moment, day-to-day. No intention of ours is ever any better or stronger than our ability to remember it. When we have an aim, we are no longer merely the unconscious creature of our own self-serving consciousness. Our mind has been seeded with an intention based in a higher form of will, whose wish it is -- within us and for us -- to see the Truth about us according to that intention. Never mind any so-called negative effects of working diligently with higher intentions.

Jilli: What is the difference between depression and conscious suffering? Identification?

GF: At the root of all negative states that hold one captive there is always one's unconscious consent to embrace the state in question. This embracing can be in the form of either resisting it or welcoming it; it matters not. This is what it means to identify -- where one's sense of self is derived from the energetic condition it is in relationship with. Conscious suffering is the deliberate detachment, not from the state one suffers from, but from the self that ordinarily unconsciously identifies with it.

cyk1: I have been having serious difficulties conveying my true self and abilities towards others regarding business matters. I believe they do not have the potential to truly see due to their own lack of trueness. How can I make sure I am not doing something wrong inwardly that causes me to repel what I believe to be good? Or am I "barking up the wrong tree"? I think persistence is good, but is it?

GF: If you are trying to convey what you are calling your "true self" to others, then it does not surprise me that you are receiving different forms of resistance from them. Does an oak tree stand there and say, "Look at my mighty limbs, would you like to climb upon them?" Does the moon claim, "See how softly I shine?" One's true nature expresses itself without effort. Our task is to catch the part of ourselves that wants to be seen in any light whatsoever by anyone. That work of watching ourselves produces natural humility, a beautiful feature of your own True Nature.

cyk1: With all due respect, an oak tree does not need to keep a 40-50 hour per week job to help get out of past debt from when it was an acorn, while keeping current on basic overhead for himself and the acorns he is growing.

GF: As long as any man or woman believes that it is necessary to live in this world according to the socially mandated ideas of what it means to succeed, he will always find himself a day late and a dollar short. Even if he has the money, he sacrifices the fulfillment of his soul for the passing satisfaction of being seen as someone special in this lost world.

cyk1: This oak tree is in this harsh world as are we, but is not subject to other oaks trying to limit its natural ability and is not surrounded by scum. This is why I asked if you thought I may be pursuing wrong directions if I am not gaining in this practical manner.

GF: You have to ask yourself what it is that you believe you're gaining. Until you understand that your present purpose in life is being dictated to you by your wish to fulfill purposes inculcated in you by a world that knows nothing about contentment, you must chase empty ends.

AJ: Putting all New Age ideas about reincarnation aside, will our "true self" survive after our physical body dies and is gone?

GF: Who you really are was never born and cannot die.

c: Who you really are was never born and cannot die? Does this mean that I will suffer forever if I don't "wake up" once my physical body dies? I suppose this rules out suicide as a way to escape.

GF: While I wouldn't say that your conclusion here is correct, neither are you far from the mark. Nothing about our soul (and its destructive tendencies) changes just because we shed our mortal coil. And suicide is not an escape; it is an entrance into a condition worse than the one thought to be escaped.

AJ: Cryonic suspension (freezing the body after death to preserve it) is gaining popularity. The belief is the "astral self" needs an "anchor" on this world in order to continue to live. What do you think is the root of this fear?

GF: There is no end to the insanity of a world driven insane by the pain of not knowing what it's for. So it goes with the world, so with its peoples. Do your inner work; let this crazy, psychopathic planet go where it wishes to go. Don't go with it.

Slick: I get bored with most things almost immediately. How can I cope with feelings of monotony in my daily life?

GF: The only thing that is monotonous about one's own life is his own recurring thoughts and feelings about it. See the truth of this and work to drop the feelings you have of being bored, that are born out of reliving all that you don't want.

james: When speaking to a crowd or certain people, something always happens inside me that makes me want them to look away so that I can bury my head. Can you please help me understand this?

GF: This is deep, but if you'll consider it, you will begin to walk away from what now punishes you in front of other people. The only thing that troubles us or pains us in any way about any other human being is what we secretly want from him or her. And when you realize through your work that no one can grant you the fearless life you long for by their approval, you will at last begin to detach yourself from caring what others think about you.

sandy: I tell myself everyday that life is bad. Is this all right?

GF: If you mean that you tell yourself that life is "hard," here's something to help you get over this stone in your soul. The only thing that is hard about this life (for any of us) is that we are still ignorant of its purpose for us. Once we realize what we are meant to do with our lives, everything that happens serves our new understanding, including the so-called "hard times."

ruthann: I have had a severe insomnia problem since I was seven years old. Every once in awhile (while I wait, hoping I'll go to sleep), I sense that I am actually afraid to fall asleep. It is 48 years since I was seven, and I have found no solutions that help me fall asleep. Do you have any suggestions?

GF: As best you can understand this idea, work at it: So much of one's insomnia is born out of resisting the fact that one can't fall asleep. The mind sits and says: "When will I drift off? Will I be up all night?" Don't think about your condition; bring it fully into your awareness of yourself lying in bed. Meditate instead of cogitate. You will drift off once you stop resisting your own interior state.

cyk1: My typically long fuse is running short with my so-called friends/associates regarding their lack of consciousness, consideration and choosing to live a life of self-centeredness and fear. I was always good at letting go and being kind, even before I heard you phrase it that way. Why am I seemingly regressing in this department? I wish for like-minded people and situations, but keep getting bad people around me… lies and more lies and inconsideration… any suggestions?

GF: Vernon Howard, a great man I worked with for many years, often told his students, "If you can take it, you can make it." Here's how this applies to what you've said: A dove does not instantly grow a sharp beak and talons. A lamb does not run with wolves. Seeing where we have deceived ourselves about our own interior life and its quality is the first step in being where it's possible for these genuine changes to occur, and the subsequent inflow of grace that comes with it.

james: I have recently finished reading Paul Brunton's A Search in Secret India, and found it very inspiring. I know you also have experience of India. Do you still think it is a worthwhile journey to make for spiritual growth?

GF: Come here.

Bonj: I realize that I do bad, but I also do good. Does the good that I do cancel out the bad that I do?

GF: In a word, no.

Bonj: Can you explain further? Doesn't light cancel out darkness?

GF: In terms of Truth, the Light does not cancel the darkness; it transforms and fulfills its potential.

jss: In the morning, just before I fully wake up, I get caught up in a whirlpool of thoughts for about 5 to 10 minutes. Now that I have become aware of this, how can I work on it?

GF: The moment you open your eyes in the morning, do not lay in bed waiting for these waves of thoughts to drag you into their unconscious whirlpool. Sit up on the edge of your bed and come as fully awake to yourself as you know how to do.

cyk1: Do we really have "chakras" in our physical body? I ask because I read an article about some sort of "power novas" they just discovered in space that they believe are pure, dense energy masses that provide energy for the rest of the universe. This sounds exactly like the idea of the "chakras" in us that are the source for our "prana" that circulates.

GF: The short answer is that there are indeed energetic centers in the body, and that our body -- with all of its energetic forms -- is a microcosm of the universe.

Jon: I wish to end my anger that seems to flare itself at a moment's notice. I wouldn't say that I am an angry person, but there are times when I cannot control it. I know this anger lives deep within and I want to go deeply to remove it.

GF: The solution that you hope for does exist -- if you're willing to do the interior work it takes. Not coincidentally, just last Friday I gave a special talk on how to end the unconscious ache of being a captive of anger. Let me strongly suggest you order the tape from this talk by contacting Chris here at the Foundation. Just go to the "Contact Us" section of the website and you'll be able to reach her.

augus: Whenever I have feelings of resentment or anger towards someone, I find myself more and more witnessing a definite change in the person towards me if I inwardly acknowledge their divinity.

GF: Better than seeing what you call the divinity of another -- something largely imagined to begin with -- is to see yourself as you are in the moment. Our awareness of bitterness or blackness of spirit is what changes not only the atmosphere around us with others, but our self is changed as well; and this is good for everyone.

Jilli: Can you change another person's angry reaction, by, in that moment, acting from truth rather than old reaction? Will it change the person who is not working? Will it change their anger by seeing you react differently?

GF: This is a good, meaningful question. The answer is "yes"; what you have described is not only possible, but (in many ways) such a conscious action on your part may be the only chance that person ever has to "taste" his own nature -- and all because you have not answered his bitterness with a bitterness.

Barry: John Trudell said on a tape it's OK to be angry at what's going on in our country. If someone is not, don't trust them. What would you say to John? Part of me agreed with him. Why do you say that anger is totally wrong for us humans? We are animals, correct? When my cat gets angry at another cat for invading its territory, is that wrong or just natural instinct?

GF: For your cat, it's instinct and natural. We are another story. Each of us is created with animal natures (all these natures within us), but we are also created to transcend (or die to) these creatures whose only answer is to meet the challenges they face with violent force. We may -- if we have it in our hearts to choose so -- be so much more than mere dumb animals. We may be divine.

Jason: I have noticed so many things that need work in my life. At times it feels overwhelming. I had an intimation this week that if I just would work on one thing, it would affect everything. Am I on the right track?

GF: Yes. Never forget this following truth: The only thing in us that ever becomes discouraged over what we discover living out its life in the dark of us is the darkness itself that we have discovered there. Its only power is the deception of discouragement. Remember the Light. Let it fight for you, and the sense of defeat inherent in discouraging thoughts will melt away in it. You have Truth's promise.

DebbiE: I have said the 23rd Psalm to my child in order to help him fall asleep. Despite the section about "the valley of the shadow of death," it seemed to help him for he wanted me to repeat it on another scary night. I know that it has a much deeper message than appears on the surface, but it's nice to know that scripture can help him.

GF: Of course it's nice to teach what truths we can to those we love. Far better than reading scripture is awakening to the Light and the Life that that scripture describes. As you work and do more to awaken, your very atmosphere will sooth the frightened beasts in your children.

MikeD: I am struggling with the paradox of ownership versus attachment. For example, I own my debts (i.e., the responsibility for them), but I realize that I should not be attached to them. The same goes for ownership in terms of manifesting the success. But how do I avoid being attached to either?

GF: Asking how one avoids being attached to something is like asking how do I let go of the anchor I'm holding onto that just fell off the boat. When we understand, when we're able to see that no attachment exists without dependency, and that no dependency lives without fear behind it, then we no longer have to ask ourselves how we shall detach ourselves from what we know is hurting us. The seeing is the freeing.

Jilli: Are our relationships with other people always a mirror of ourselves?

GF: In a word, yes. We meet ourselves everywhere we go through the life that reveals -- or that reflects back to us -- what we have brought with us (in our nature) into that moment.

seeker: Why am I content with who/what I am? I do not commit crimes. Isn't this enough?

GF: If you are content with what and who you are, as you are, what's the problem?

Jilli: When I feel negative toward someone, is that always something I need to see about myself?

GF: Yes, this is an accurate way of meeting negative manifestations that come up in us when we meet others -- regardless of their character.

Jilli: What is an example of positive behavior that is false?

GF: It's not the behavior itself at question; it is always the interior motive behind our actions that determines not just "truthfulness," but what we receive for our efforts.

Bonj: I appreciate the time you spend with us monthly. I wish it could be twice a month. I really am helped by everyone's questions and your answers. Have you considered expanding our meetings?

GF: A number of students do have an ongoing discussion group, or at least the forum for this, in our Community Zero set up. This is a special web address for any Tape Club person who wishes to join. The site also has other benefits not found on the our website available to the public. You can e-mail Chris or Tim through the usual web link on the Homepage if you want more information.

alex: Somewhere growing up I was instilled with the idea to always do your best in all things. I have been gifted with many above average accomplishments but never anything major (this includes spirituality). In every way I am attached to people happy being STUCK in their problems (while I try my best to meet life and respond accordingly), and to top it all, they are outwardly prospering more than me. I can't seem to achieve my independence.

GF: We should strive always to be and do the best we can. What others do or don't do is of relatively little importance to our true success. And real independence is spiritual, not physical. Nothing in the world can keep you from realizing this truth… nothing.

Barry: Is expressing emotions -- as in rock 'n roll -- not right for the soul? What if it's negative hard rhythms with spiritual lyrics? Nature is not always peaceful (hurricanes volcanoes, etc.).

GF: As we grow, we become increasingly awake to what is good for us and what is not. The more you can be present to yourself, and not caught up in the "pulse" of what you are living in, the clearer you will see what serves you and what does not.

GM: I have a neighbor who is always looking at me very strangely, and if I greet her, she will answer and then turn around and just stare at me. She might make some off-the-wall comment about me. Also when she comes near, I can tell because I feel a very hot feeling go over my face. I don't understand it. Maybe I'm psychic or something? I get these hot feelings when one of my kids are going to call me or when my husband is coming home from work. I'm trying to figure out if this is normal.

GF: These things are normal, and we should be careful not to make too much of them. Human beings -- by in large -- are completely undiscovered territory. Our task is to bring into this darkness (of our own hearts and minds, with all their sleeping potential) the living Light that awakens us to all that we are. Then, by the way, we no longer are concerned with how others behave towards us.

GF: Our time together on-line has nearly run its course, so now I wish to give you the remaining notes that I promised to post before we sign off.

As we discussed before the chat, all creatures in life are created to reach their natural fruition. The Great Life generously provides all of them with everything they need to fulfill their promise. This same abundance holds true for our spiritual awakening as well. Everything we need to succeed is forever raining down upon and within us.

The spiritually awakened life is not something that one achieves, like an award for fine art or some other measured performance. The true Higher Life comes to us naturally and reveals and expresses itself in anyone who realizes that, like the sun above us, this Living Light within us is always present.

It is we who are absent from this eternally indwelling Life, not because these vital forces are withheld from us, but because we waste them. Following are 12 Ways We Waste our Vital Life Forces, and for whose loss we remain sound asleep spiritually. Study these thieves closely and catch them in the act of stealing your chances for Higher Life as they drain away your vital life forces.

1. All forms of useless talking: Useless talking is a plague. Not only does it waste your life forces, but it also drains the force of any hapless soul you corner to bend his ear. Besides, most idle gabbing serves only one thing: a false sense of self. Useless talking wastes our vital energy, and until we stop wasting it, we will never hear what Real Life would have us learn.

2. Being wrongly involved in the lives of others: We get all wrapped up in the life of everyone else around us -- even commenting to ourselves about how strangers dress -- because we have no life of our own. Until we can stay out of other people's lives, we will never know the pleasure or the power of what it means to be ourselves!

3. Daydreams of any nature, past or future: It makes no difference whether our daydreams are filled with pain or with pleasure. Daydreams always rob from us because in exchange for them we are paid only in the coin of our own past sensations. And in exchange for these false fulfillments we throw away the possibility of receiving new impressions that are Real Life themselves.

4. Using excessive emotions: Do you know people who are always on the edge emotionally? Everything is a big deal, a crisis. When we live like this, not only do we drain ourselves by allowing our centers to be pumped up and then drained mechanically, but we also tend to drain everyone else we meet with these same unconscious actions.

5. Useless thinking, such as speculating "why?": When we ask, "Why did this happen?" in that very moment we throw away what we need to change the nature that caused the conflict we question. "Why?" is after the fact; it is only in the middle of the fact, only when a person is present and awake to himself, that he can catch the parts of himself that compromise him. Stop useless thinking.

6. Being identified with anything: To be identified with something means to merge yourself with it psychologically. We never identify with anything other than what are our own images about people and events. When we are identified like this we are connected to something beneath us, because thought is a lower aspect of our being, not its Divine character. In this way, we pour ourselves out of ourselves.

7. Overindulging ourselves: Overeating, smoking, drinking, over-anything is a killer. It is the result of an imbalanced nature seeking balance in what it claims will bring it the comfort it needs. When we overindulge in something, no matter what it is -- whether it's emotion or Eskimo Pie -- we are at that moment costing ourselves our spiritual lives, not to mention our physical well-being.

8. Being concerned with how others see you: Why do we care what human beings think of us? Because our present level of self derives its sense of being by thinking about what others are thinking about it; and the more this self can feel that the picture it holds of how others see it is a good one, the better this pathetic self feels about itself! What a lie. What a waste!

9. Puttering around in order to keep yourself feeling productive: Do you want to know what it would be to be productive? It would be to be awake to yourself right now. Then you wouldn't have to try to figure out ways to busy yourself so you feel like you're doing something with your life, because God's life itself would be busy doing with you what you are intended to have done with you.

10. Rushing through or to anything: Rushing about is a way of life on this planet! Why is this? We feel incomplete; we don't have what we think we should to be happy and whole, so we rush to get "there" -- to what is imagined as missing. Why do we feel this way? We have holes in our souls. And the more we rush, the more we drain ourselves of the only thing that can make us whole in our soul.

11. Becoming frustrated, impatient, or angry: When we're frustrated, we think we're frustrated with something. We are never frustrated with anything other than our own understanding, period. All impatience and anger is an act of lashing out at what our present nature calls the object of our pain, when our own unenlightened state is the cause of our conflict. Want more light? Stop wasting fuel!

12. Wrestling with anxious feelings and trying to think our way out of pain: We wrestle with anxious thoughts and confused feelings, trying to pin them down. To us, it feels like this struggle is mandatory to be free of their pain. This is a lie. The more we wrestle with what is wrecking us, the more we get wrecked for our relationship with them, so that we lose both the fight and our vital forces.

For extra benefit I highly recommend that you make your own list of the ways in which you are letting your life be stolen. Everything we do to discover where our vital life forces are being drained out of us ensures we will have that much more Real Life of our own.

Our time has run out. Remember, your wish to awaken must be supported by your inner work to that end. The Truth wants us to succeed in becoming whole and higher human beings. Let it help you by helping yourself to a sincere study of these ideas. Persist with your wish to be free.

See you next month on September 4. Until then, remember yourself and keep the Light with you at all times. Good night.

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GF: Welcome everyone. Before we begin tonight let me present a few thoughts about what is required of us to walk away from useless suffering. No one can hope to know such freedom without first understanding certain truths as to what keeps us captives of unconscious negative forces. We will discuss some of these insights now, and more at chat's close.

Nothing is harder for us to accept about ourselves than the yet-to-be seen fact that, whatever form this pain may take, we play an unconscious role in our own habitual suffering. Some of us are prone to high anxiety, while others can't escape those low dark states associated with depression and self-loathing. But the fact remains:

We must challenge this involuntary, and often intractable, refusal to even entertain the idea of our complicity in what compromises us; for without gathering the self-knowledge we need to nullify this conflicted condition in our psyche, how can we hope to end the heartaches that begin there? How can we hope to heal something we won't even look at!

On the other hand, nothing is healthier for us than the beautiful process of awakening to how we have been unwittingly involved in our own aching. And we stand in good and wise company if we will consent to make such a discovery in ourselves. Down through the ages all True teachings have disseminated the following lesson:

Freedom from any compulsive, self-wrecking behavior must begin with our recognition that we are voluntarily serving that which compromises us, even though we may strongly claim the counter is true. Such a conscious awareness of (this) conflict inherent in our own divided mind may be difficult to endure, but only if we fail to realize this last point:

This conscious awareness (and it alone) is the seed of a new action that eventually flowers in a self-wholeness that is one and the same with the true self-freedom we are all seeking. With these ideas in mind, let's gather the rest of the facts we need to let go of all regrets by separating ourselves from what has been useless suffering.

If you watch animals in the wild, as the author enjoys doing, one thing is obvious: The nature of any animal and its natural experience of life are indivisibly related. For example, deer attract biting flies. In the high heat of summer you won't see one without the other, and I have seen deer driven nearly crazy by these pests. They have no choice in this seasonal torment.

I make this point because, much in the same way as an animal's nature attracts to it the elements that define that creature's life, the same holds true in many ways for human beings. Not only does our present nature attract what we call our life experience, but it also determines the way in which we see and experience these same events.

We may doubt this timeless truth -- that one's inner nature determines one's experience of the outer life -- but the outcome remains the same. To continue the earlier metaphor, all of us know what it's like to find ourselves in a swarm of stinging thoughts and feelings -- where we are unable to outrun them or otherwise escape their punishing presence.

But this is where the similarity ends, or at least where it ought to, between our nature and that of our animal brothers and sisters. An animal has no choice but to tolerate what its nature attracts to it from the world around it. We alone may choose what we receive from life; that is provided we are willing to awaken to our True Nature.

All of us have felt certain deep and silent promptings to realize our Original Self, even though we may not yet have recognized them as such. For instance, we all feel intuitively that we are not created to live in torment of any kind, that we are more than hapless victims forced to yield to passing conditions. And as we shall see, this is a true intuition.

We are not made by that Great Intelligence that balances whole star systems to suffer from the conflict inherent in what amounts to an unbalanced understanding of our own essential nature! And this is why if we ever wish to gain conscious control over our present nature -- along with what it attracts into our life -- we must gain true self-knowledge.

But this needed higher knowledge cannot be acquired from sources outside of us; it must be gained through honest self-discovery. Only real changes in the level of our self-understanding can change our present nature, for they are very much related. Change one and we change the other, including what it has been attracting into our lives.

Most of us know or have seen someone whose unconscious thoughts and feelings serve to attract painful events into his or her life. Of course, as a rule, this same person blames his unhappiness on evil people, or on a world set against him. But our higher understanding allows us insight into the real reason for his continuing misfortune.

The problem is that when it comes to understanding ourselves by looking into the mirror of our own experience, our once clear vision fails us; which helps explain, in part, the Sufi teaching regarding the necessity for "polishing the mirror of the heart." But as with all such spiritual ideas concerning being more self-discerning, there is more to it than meets the eye!

For by the degree we empower ourselves to see what is Real, so are we at once set free from the powerful grip of painful illusions that once imprisoned us. Before we close the chat tonight I will pass along a simple illustration to help shed more light on this last crucial insight.

We can get started now, but please do keep your questions and comments based in your own discoveries, and not in mere philosophical speculation. What do you want to discuss? What are you working on in yourself? Let's see what we can learn tonight. You are on.

Akaysha: Do you believe it is necessary to dredge up past issues, acknowledge and make effort to release them, or that we can move forward without doing this?

GF: No, there is little to no true value in recollecting painful past issues. One of the things that one must come to discover is that whatever it is that may need correction in our life, it can only be corrected in the moment that it is present in its essence and met in that same moment by one's awareness of those contradictory elements in himself. Then the Light does for us what it is intended to do, which is make us whole. That's the healing.

Eric: Sometimes when I see nervous, anxious, worrisome, despairing, and any other self-tormenting thoughts and/or feelings surging through me, I seem to detect another little subtle thought saying, "These thoughts and feelings are necessary; there is no escaping them." And that vague thought seems to come (especially) AFTER I have questioned the necessity of those earlier self-tormenting thoughts and feelings. Please, do you have any insight into that?

GF: What you have described is absolutely natural as long as we remain in relationship with the very nature that is providing the same punishing thoughts and feelings you've described. It has to say there is no escaping "me" because without this painful opposite in you to resist, this sleeping sense of self can derive no other sensation of life for itself. This self is resistance itself. Knowing this lets us let go.

Peggy: I appreciate your comment about the fact that we are voluntarily serving our compromising states. I say I want certain things, but I am not doing what I need to do to manifest them. This has been going on my whole life. I look forward to your further comments on this phenomenon.

GF: Yes, by all means stay until the end of the chat to read the remainder of the essay that goes deeply into this problem and then delivers new knowledge that can become a true solution.

BillH: I have noticed that some activities don't bring the sense of happiness they used to. Is there a good way to tell if this is due to a problem such as depression versus a positive change of growing out of those activities?

GF: The difference between having outgrown the love of a lower sensation versus being a captive of a dark depression should be something fairly easy to discern. For starters, when we are ready to leave certain worldly pursuits behind us, we are not made unhappy due to the understanding that has brought us to that point. On the other hand, if we find ourselves sorrowful over something, whatever it is, it's clear we haven't outgrown either that condition or the consciousness attracted to it.

James1: I too have had these activities make me happy in the past but now leave me empty. Have I grown beyond these sensory vibrations? Is my looking back the pain? I've caught glimpses of my first response to new things: dread. I want to see more, but it's scary and shameful.

GF: In the long run, what we eventually realize is that what we really want is not something new to desire, but to be free of wants (that compromise us) altogether. This losing interest in the world's power to please us begins with losing interest in the pleasures that once made us content. To that extent it often feels as though we are losing ourselves because our former sense of self depended upon these same sensations.

mikejb35: How do we move from independence (once gained) to interdependence with others, such as in relationships, business dealings, and the like?

GF: The assumption in your question is that you have already gained independence, but if I may say so, the condition that you're calling independence should be placed under a certain amount of doubt. Here's why: True independence is automatically perfectly interdependent with all people and events it enters into. False independence is usually based in some kind of fear or control behavior by which we want to protect ourselves from some forthcoming pain.

Diojeneez: God told Moses, "I am that I am." Vernon Howard says, "God IS consciousness." Please, make the connection.

GF: One of the main stumbling blocks for spiritual seekers of a God-centered life is the fantastic but mistaken idea that one can have a life in God apart from the life of God that that life is in. Of course there are stages to self-realization relative to relationship with the Divine, but "I am that I am" simply means that there is nothing apart from me to know me other than what is me.

Diojeneez: Ah, so God is the absence of me. So the question, "What is God?" makes no sense.

GF: In essence, that's correct. Even God himself says to have no graven images, and originally was the God with no name for just this reason. A divided nature can never know what is Whole.

mobilman: There is us and there is the One. Where my question lies is in who is expected to do what part of this transformation?

GF: There is an old teaching that says something like this: "If one wishes to have God's life, he or she must give everything toward that desire, even though nothing that one does toward such a desire can actually effect the outcome of that desire. Then, knowing this, one must forget that he knows it. The reason for this is that True self-realization is something God grants on His own, in His own way, and all unbeknownst to the one who would have such a transformation take place. Our task is to love the Light; the Light will do the rest if we'll simply hold it first and foremost.

Rael: I see the hardened pattern of habitual responses in which my life is lived, but have been experiencing an ever diminishing energy to find freedom from this cage. Is there a source of new energy to be found?

GF: The energy that one needs to proceed upward on the interior path is given to him or her in direct proportion to the clarity with which they see the actual content of their own being -- much in the same way a man groggily napping in his house finds instant energy to leap from it when he sees it is on fire. So is it for us. Our task is to watch ourselves and allow what we discover to lead us where it will.

redgreen: Guy, are you awake?

GF: The reason that your question cannot be answered the way you wish is because whether or not I am what you would call awake is not the issue. The only thing that one should be concerned with is what is going through him or her right now, and not the condition of any other human being around them. Besides which, no matter which way I would answer your question, it would produce a problem for you. Work on yourself to awaken and then you will know without asking who is or is not awake.

TJ: The way in which I have grown through listening and understanding many of your talks has been through repetition. If I relocate to Southern Oregon for the sake of being closer to a true source of truth, will I receive the same benefit? How could I when it takes me several times to listen to one talk or idea, let alone several per week? I think it would be great to be in proximity to Life of Learning Foundation, but want to know if it's the right method.

GF: There is a tried and true axiom that says it takes a lighted candle to light a candle. If your interest is in awakening to yourself, then you would do well to come for a visit and see how the talks impact your life. The difference between being in the atmosphere of the live meeting versus listening to a tape is the difference between standing on the seashore and smelling the ocean air versus buying an aerosol can called "Ocean Spray."

TJ: I have been on several of what appear to be promising job interviews where I'm told many positive things, yet I'm left hanging, avoided, and lied to. I am wondering if it is me or something I am doing to make these people uncomfortable. I see their sleep and know the job is not right for me but I desperately need income. Please comment. I'm running out of financial resources.

GF: There's no way that I'm able to tell you through a written answer what you seek to resolve this confusion. I can fairly much assure you that the old idea "it takes two to tango" is never far off the mark. However, try as best you can to not ponder past defeats, as this only builds unconscious resistance in you in moments forthcoming where you need to be present to yourself and awake. Start over -- that's the Golden Rule. It always works.

mikejb35: In the Old Testament, it says something like (God speaking): "I will write my commandment (of love) on their hearts." Is this the same as saying that God placed the Kingdom of Heaven within?

GF: Yes, that is basically what the statement means, although the interior meaning of "my commandment of love on their hearts" has to do with a Living Light that is the actual essence of the spiritual heart that longs for God and His life. In other words, it is not a place one reaches for, but a presence interiorly we are created to become conscious of and in.

Diojeneez: The Kingdom of Heaven is within, but conscious men like Swedenborg say there are actually three heavens, and "few will understand me." Swedenborg is no idiot, so I researched this. In some saint biographies it said, "they passed into the third heaven," at death. Is that related to these teachings at all?

GF: Christ himself said "my Father's kingdom has many mansions." In this he is referring, as are other True men of spirit, to the fact that within our own sleeping consciousness there dwells a Living Light whose presence may effortlessly penetrate into what amounts to an infinite number of higher kingdoms. These same kingdoms are often referred to as being in a triad, hence the number three.

DocBlock: Is the west coast higher in vibration than the east coast, or are the only vibrations within our own minds?

GF: I'll answer this question, but only in the hopes you can understand the higher meaning of what I say. First, just like in the human body and its various centers of sensitivity and organic relationship with its own parts, the earth is fashioned similarly. That means there are indeed places where naturally higher frequencies may be found. But these differences mean almost nothing to an individual who is still thinking about life instead of investigating the thought nature and its low vibration.

Eric: When I see myself anxiously and worriedly fawning in order to gain the approval of another person, as I have spent the last 3 weeks of my life doing with a girl I recently met (if only I could just relax and be pleasant), should I just watch and endure the pain of watching my present nature in action? And should I also make the "non-effort" of not trying to do anything about it? Am I on the right track here?

GF: First, catching yourself being a weak man for the purposes of pleasing the opposite sex is a good discovery in itself. Make it your intention to watch yourself as closely as you can while trying to be someone instead of doing the natural work of seeing that only something in you that feels it's no one struggles to be someone in the eyes of another. This kind of observation will gradually free you from the futile and painful practice of trying to impress others.

TJ: Certain loved ones of mine are being faced with horrific circumstances and losing their ability to function naturally. This is affecting all around them and there seems to be no way out of these problems. How can we stay focused on God's love and keep faith when certain horrors come into existence? It is hard to believe God is allowing this when a loved one loses necessary human functions to live and is caused to hurt others.

GF: I would turn your question around and instead of asking how can we stay focused on God's love and keep faith in the face of certain horrors to come, ask what is it in me that wants to identify and derive a sense of self from any imagined horror? Everything that takes place in our lives is potentially what each of us needs for the next step in our own spiritual development. This includes not only our own suffering, but the suffering of those that we love as well. Once we learn this great secret... that the entire cosmos serves the spiritually seeking man or woman, we are well on our way to realizing our place in God's great heaven.

Langston: Can you please provide some insight on how one should approach moving closer to a location where Truth is taught, when a result of that move will cause one to have to "leave behind" their family?

GF: If by "leave behind their family" you are referring to small children and a wife, then one must be very diligent and discerning with such choices. We are responsible for our actions in this life until they are complete, and that includes taking care of those who are necessarily dependent upon us. If on the other hand you are talking about a family being your parents or other relatives, pack your bags; it's time to leave things that are meant for children to the children that want them.

Langston: Yes, in fact I do mean a wife and small child. I am standing before a crossroads here. I want to provide for my family, and I necessarily do so, but I need to also be surrounded by like-minded people and an authentic school. I have asked my wife to come with me, but, she refuses.

GF: I understand what you have said. Now you must understand it would be not only improper, but actually unjust were I to guide you with actions in this circumstance. You alone know the conditions of your relationship, and you alone must make the determination as to the extent of what it means to be responsible versus being afraid of feeling guilty. Keep working on yourself and hold your wish for a new life in place. God will never leave you out of the picture.

BillH: I recently read some material which covered concepts like our "inner child" or "inner critic" and the value of having a dialog with them. Are these examples of the false selves you speak of or something else? Is there value in having dialogs with inner selves that don't normally have an opportunity to speak?

GF: There is no value having a dialogue with oneself, regardless of what we may call this "self" with which we speak. Your time is far better spent listening to the dialogue in your head that doesn't need you to take one of the parts in the play.

BARRY: I was listening to an old live recording from KPFK today coming back from work. You said something like "I've had students who believe they are observing or being mindful, however what they are doing is using the mindful practice as a new sense of self." How does one know the difference? I feel I'm observing most of the time correctly, but maybe not?

GF: It's important that one try to discern the difference between being awake to the whole of oneself versus being absorbed by the act of trying to be awake to oneself. When we are awake to ourselves, there is a seer who is conscious of all things being seen, including its own presence in the mix. In self-absorption, we are secretly identified with seeing and as such are deceived as to our action.

redgreen: It would be supportive to know that at least one person is awake. With the exception of a handful of celebrated spiritual people, I am not aware of anyone being awake.

GF: I hate to pop your bubble, but 99% of what the world considers celebrated spiritual people are in some ways worse than asleep. The best I can tell you is that a lion never fails to recognize another lion, and never mistakes it for anything else. Within you is the Christ Life, that nature of Light that can never mistake darkness for anything other than it is. Strive to realize this Light in yourself and it will not only guide you where you need to be, but it will effortlessly confirm your actions.

BARRY: I don't know what to do with my life and feel I don't fit in. I'm 32, have no career, no money, no direction of what I should do with my life. Is this a good thing? The "TPIC" has lots of ideas about what I should be doing, but how does one know what the person that is anchored outside of time should do with one's life? Should I just wait until I just know?

GF: Look, you may not know what you want to do with your life, and there's nothing wrong with that. But if you want a spiritual life you must learn what it means to be a good householder. This means that you must provide for yourself by some measure and must never be a dependent upon others or our social welfare systems. Begin with starting in the right place, which is throwing yourself into whatever it is you most fear doing, including meeting if necessary the parts of you that want to do nothing. You'll learn from this if you'll do it.

BARRY: It has been said that one's calling is pointing to the road (or the direction where to look for the road) but not giving a map. Do you agree?

GF: No map exists by which one can move from what is untrue to what is true. Truth alone is the guide and the goal.

mobilman: On the subject of attention, I once heard you say something to the effect that "if we are aware of anything, we are aware of the object of our attention, but not the nature of our attention." Does that mean we have more than one type of attention?

GF: True awareness must include both object and subject, as awareness transcends the opposites that produce the illusion that there is a difference between the observer and the observed.

ruth: I have read material by some authors that say we can "experience" God and be aware of Him and His kingdom. I long to be able to do that; however, I don't know how to even start the process. Do you have any advice?

GF: Start where you are, not where you want to be. It is in the growing awareness of our actual condition that we are at last made ready to receive something that is already within our condition, but that is covered up by our identification with that condition.

MichaelCorrinet: "I" experienced "God" directly when I was seventeen. I spent three years of utter bliss and clear thinking, then gave it up for reasons too lengthy to go into here. I'm just starting to reawaken. Any advice?

GF: Lend your whole heart, your mind, and your soul to your wish to realize your relationship with the Living Light. If you indeed had an awakening as you've described, you can never give up such an opening in yourself, and it only awaits your returned attention for its re-intervention into your life.

MichaelCorrinet: I want to awaken fully again, with all my heart. I live in a darkness brighter than most people have ever imagined, yet I yearn for what I had.

GF: You may be assured of this: There are instances where for reasons known only to God, he touches a soul and illuminates it. Sometimes it's only for five seconds, sometimes it lasts for five months. But He withdraws His Light, and when He does, there is a terrible darkness born of that absence. The thing to remember is that this terrible darkness is not a punishment, but stands as invitation for that same soul to give itself up to the Light it longs to live within.

BARRY: Which book or tapes would you recommend for the questions I have asked in this chat?

GF: I think that Design Your Destiny would give you some needed (inner) direction as well as the right encouragement to start (life) over. As for tapes, if you haven't heard the material in the "Heart and Soul of Freedom" album, it will prove helpful in countless ways. As always, just return anything that you feel doesn't add more light to your life.

BARRY: What would you think of someone putting these ideas of yours into rock music? Also, is it possible to be just a messenger and not a priest in doing so? I don't have all of it figured out, but how could I deliver it?

GF: The day may come when these teachings are presented in a musically staged performance. It is in the back of my mind, albeit distantly. Whatever we do that isn't motivated by love must fail (us) even if it seems not. And what we do for love succeeds without messenger or "priest."

BARRY: Would you say most thought is useless? It seems to me most thought is an addiction.

GF: You are not far off the mark.

Diojeneez: "An evil generation seeks a sign, no sign will be given but that of Jonah the prophet." The first part is clear, what does that second part mean?

GF: I have never considered this question, and I have no immediate insight into it either.

Kieran: Because of your teachings (and my work), I am starting to see the shallow values in myself and others. I am beginning to be able to really laugh at myself now. But I am also laughing at others' ignorance and vanity, etc. Some see me as being uncaring and insensitive even though I naturally have less anger in me because of my work. Could you give any advice please?

GF: Be careful not to identify with anything in you that feels in any way superior to those around you. Light is naturally recognized as being different in nature than darkness. So let it be with your understanding with regard to others with less self-knowledge.

TIPS Question 1: You say that everything we do and every action we take is born out of an opposite. I can understand and see that. It seems an inescapable law of this existence. Yet you also talk about transcending these opposites. Is this an awareness of this law and knowing it is taking place, or are you talking of a life under a different law which governs our action?

GF: We have within us a certain conscious property that is not of the same order of life, or reality, as is thought. Commonly we call this aspect of ourselves higher awareness. This light that is a form of consciousness can dwell in the opposites and be conscious of their content without being drawn into being identified with the "this or that" aspect of these opposites. This is why we do the work to awaken ourselves, because this higher nature lives above the ache of the opposites.

TIPS Question 2: Our world appears to celebrate the public expression of all kinds of emotion. What is the proper place for emotion in our spiritual work?

GF: Higher emotion never has self-consciousness or a motive attached to it. It is a pure and innocent energy that requires nothing to confirm its existence in order to feel the contentment that is its natural being. Public expression of emotion is almost always for the purpose of winning attention or otherwise placing someone in the spotlight of self-generated sensation.

TIPS Question 3: Since the beginning of human history this planet has been ruled by the aggressive use of force. Why? Will it ever change?

GF: Because the only strength that human beings know is the assertion of an opposite, which of course is not real strength but always a form of resistance bred of conflict.

TIPS Question 4: How does your work relate to the 12-step programs? I've noticed similarities.

GF: The only time it's possible for true change to take place in one's life is when at last that same person realizes that he is incapable of making true changes through his own efforts. Then that man or woman has been made receptive to a relationship with something greater than themselves that alone can heal themselves.

TIPS Question 5: If your disturbance arrives on the back of another, how do you use AAA [accept-agree-allow] and keep from being taken advantage of?

GF: By working to accept, allow, and agree to any moment such as you've described, one will find they cannot be "taken advantage of" because there will be no separate self sitting outside of that relationship to either act as judge or victim.

TIPS Question 6: What is it about people (me) who always seek comfort, avoid going the extra distance, and feel as though they have tried and tried to reach their goal, but haven't?

GF: By and large, the reason that most of us won't go the extra mile is because there's no one there within us capable of asserting such a will over our essentially divided nature. Before we can actually "do" real inner work, we must have discovered how fractured our present nature actually is. The awareness of this division within us is the beginning of its coalescence, which leads to the ability to do what you have asked.

TIPS Question 7: How can I be more productive as a human being and translate that into my business?

GF: In the end, clarity is the same as productivity. The more clear we are within ourselves about ourselves and our aims, the more effectively we not only achieve these, but are able to communicate them to others.

TJ: How can we then see with more clarity? Do we always need crisis to give us clarity or are we meant to be limited in certain ways?

GF: Clarity is not an effect of something, but is its original state. Clouded minds want to clear themselves, which is impossible. We need to see where confusion dominates our life and then stop doing the will of those parts of us involved in this secret form of self-punishment. Then clarity reveals itself in unlimited measures relative to our capacity to receive such wholeness.

TIPS Question 8: You have both condemned the use of imagination and spoken of the right use of imagination. This is a powerful mechanism of the mind. Would you elaborate on the proper use of imagination in the work?

GF: The improper use of imagination is when the mind works by itself to produce first an image and then a self in relationship with that image that derives its experience from that creation. This is classic division in the mind and is destructive in that it leads nowhere other than to self-induced pleasures.

TIPS Question 9: You have given us many practical steps (such as "accept-agree-allow") and I'm seeing that the most important thing I need to do is to be awake to the moment that brings the lessons. What can I do to strengthen my ability to remember that intention?

GF: Never make an excuse for yourself again when meeting the fact that by falling asleep to yourself you stumbled and fell and hurt yourself or someone else. We must all continually work to realize the relationship between our experience in life and what we are connected with in our mind that produces this experience.

TIPS Question 10: Is it right to feel a sense of urgency to do this work?

GF: Either one feels such an urgency or one doesn't. There's no question of right or wrong relative to the sense one has that his or her soul depends upon the steps needed to develop it. If I myself feel an urgency for transformation, then that urgency stands. If I don't have this, then I don't. Learn to obey the parts of you that are telling you what you must do to fulfill the purpose of your life. Learn to disregard all other interior voices.

TIPS Question 11: Is there a way to tell if another person is beyond all hope of turning from Darkness?

GF: Yes, but best to concern yourself with increasing your love for the Light than to worry over such things. Besides, it is only the Living Light in one that can make such a determination without negative or self-righteous judgment in it.

TIPS Question 12: How do you receive your wisdom and knowledge?

GF: One must learn what it means to ask for what one really wants. Anyone who asks for a life in the Light -- and who will pay for what they receive -- will be given what he or she requests. It is a Law.

TIPS Question 13: When one has a chronic illness that affects not only the body, i.e. fatigue, but also mind (severe vertigo/dizziness) how can one continue to work at not getting identified with one's inability to maintain attention and make real progress?

GF: Everything, no exception, can be used for one's spiritual development. Identification with unwanted conditions can consume what little energy we have, so instead of allowing yourself to be caught in such self-centered considerations, drop these thoughts as you catch them and you will find new energy available for new and higher interior work.

TIPS Question 14: What can I do to maintain my awakened state for a period of time?

GF: Don't ask what can I do to maintain this or that, but use your attention to catch where it is that you get put deeper into (spiritual) sleep!

TIPS Question 15: If a person is doing something illegal and it affects one, should it be left alone and let it run its course, or should one intervene and try to make it right?

GF: We must never do what we know in our hearts is the wrong thing for us to be doing.

TIPS Question 16: This question is not to justify eating junk food, but could it be true that refined foods can be transformed to a usable form when we have grown in our spiritual life? God created all things. Man changes these things, but once we are living a higher life, will our bodies use the elements differently?

GF: We are in bodies that require certain elements -- in certain states of balance -- in order to know physical well being. Don't eat foods for the sake of convenience or just for their pleasure quotient. The rest will handle itself.

TIPS Question 17: Many people believe that they need to pay money to spiritually oriented therapists who can tell them why and how they are ailing and what to do about it. People believe that emotions can be suppressed and uncovered through this. How true is this notion that they can get better?

GF: Let those who think the path to true self-newness can be found by reliving what is old and without life find their own way through this mistaken thinking.

GF: Our time has nearly run its course for tonight, but before we say good night I wish to send along the rest of the special material I wrote for our discussion on how to walk way from useless and unconscious suffering.

Imagine a young child alone in a darkened bedroom at night... maybe you can draw upon your own experience as this story unfolds. A truck drives by, headed down the neighborhood street, and its bright lights pass through the bedroom window -- causing a large shadow to suddenly appear on the opposing wall.

The child, awakened by the truck as it rumbles by, opens his eyes to see this menacing looking dark shape race from one corner of the room to the other. And because he witnesses what he cannot understand (as his youth allows him no knowledge of the actual nature of nighttime shadows), his tender mind is instantly flooded with fear.

Hearing the child cry out, caring parents rush into the room to explain the truth of what just happened: "Darling, what you saw dive into that dark corner and disappear is nothing more than a shadow; and you must understand that even though we can see their form, shadows are not real; of themselves they have no substance, which means they cannot hurt you."

Then, one of the parents -- perhaps using a flashlight to back-light a hand so as to cast a creepy shadow on the same wall -- would use her deliberate display to make this final point: "It's only our fearful feelings about these shadows that give them the power to frighten us." And then, drawing nearer to her son, she makes sure she has his attention: "Watch closely now and your father and I will show you the truth of this." And right at that moment the child's father turns on the overhead light in the room, making the shadow figure disappear. She continues in a gentle but firm voice: "So do you see, my darling? Shadows are really nothing more than a temporary form of nothingness that our own fearful reactions make seem real. But they are not!"

When she sees her child smile back, she kisses him good night and turns off the light. Her mind is at peace, knowing full well that her son will never again feel the punishing fear that comes with believing in shadows. We may share this same confidence if we wish. All that is asked of us is to see what is true and then to act upon it.

Just as this attentive parent intends -- for the new knowledge she delicately plants in her child's mind -- that he should never again be tormented by the presence of any shadowy shape, so too does the Living Truth hold out a similar instruction for us to take into our mind: All thoughts are but mere shadows. They have no substance of themselves other than what we impart to them as we see them start to take shape upon the walls of our own unenlightened mind.

One brief illustrative example will clarify this last idea. Take a man who catches a glimpse of a couple ahead of him as they just turn the corner. For a second he thinks he has seen the love of his life walking hand in hand with a complete stranger! Fear and anxiety race through him as he runs to confirm what he's afraid to even imagine. But here's the key lesson in this unfolding drama: What this man actually sees in his mind's eye as he sprints to the end of the next corner is not what he had seen only the moment before; for he now sees life around him through the torment-filled thought-bred images of what his life will be like once he turns the corner and confirms his worst fear! We have all been battered by some such bad dream.

These painful emotions of high anxiety feel as real as they do because they are born out of our being fully identified with dozens of unwanted and fear-filled images passing before our mind's eye. These pain-filled images are a lie. They always are. Besides, as it turns out, the woman he saw wasn't his sweetheart after all!

This happy ending is not the point; there's even a happier ending in store for us if we will follow this spiritual story all the way to its full unfolding. When we think about any painful event, be it only twenty minutes old or as long as thirty years ago, we are looking at nothing more than a shadow of something that once was, but that is no more! But these pressing thought-produced shadows running though the mind have connected to them, through unconscious emotional associations, the very stuff of the suffering that first appeared with them; and it is important, for the following reasons, that we recognize how this psychological process continues to unfold from here:

Like the small child in our story who gives the passing shadow on the wall the power to produce fear in himself, we unknowingly imbue our own imaginings with the power to punish us as we -- seemingly, naturally -- struggle to resist these painful images passing through our psyche. Which brings us to an essential point in this study:

The pain we feel in ourselves as we recollect what once wrecked our life is real in itself, but the cause of this suffering is a lie. Can this be? Let's see. A simple question answers the mystery: If there weren't something in us wanting to revisit these painful old images -- to feel their familiar old pangs -- then would we? The answer is "No!"

And once we can see the truth of this finding, as it applies to the aching we feel, then we are ready for the next step in letting go of what lashes us: We can dare to consciously doubt the conclusion that our own feelings would have us accept as being true: That we have no choice but to believe in ghosts! Thanks to Higher Understanding we now know better!

To help summarize this advanced lesson in letting go, here is a special short poem whose wisdom you can always call on to help you remember the truth that helps set you free. Dare to apply this truth-filled understanding to any moment that you find filling with self-wrecking states, and watch how you can make even the most stubborn sufferings disappear: The "feel" is real, but the "why" is a lie! Let this truth about tormenting feelings find a home in your heart and mind and you will never again find yourself feeling lost in moments of emotional crisis.

That's all the time we have for tonight. See you next month, August 7, same time and place. Until then, remember yourself, your God, and to always put the Truth first in all things. Good night.

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GF: Welcome and good evening. Our chat will begin once I post these opening remarks on what each of us can do -- on a daily basis -- to develop more harmonious human relationships.

Deep spiritual work reveals the truth that hellish things on earth manifest as they do because their dark cause dwells hidden somewhere in us. Tonight we look into this interior abyss and shine into its unseen corners a beautiful light of understanding. We will illuminate the center of the earth where dark forces are always celebrating some victory over unconscious human beings.

Imagine the chief devil calling together every possible evil entity that is in range of his magnetic voice and saying, "How can we interfere up there? What can we do to further deceive human beings? We must keep them in the dark so they can't see the Light that wants to rescue them. I want something so evil, so sinister, that no one will know what happened. Who's got it?"

The flames of all the little imps dim a little bit because they're afraid; but two days later, they all come back with a few ideas, although nothing spectacular. Then one tiny imp hops on the shoulder of the devil and whispers something in his ear. Great flames shoot out of the devil and sear the little imp who cries out "Thank you!" Then the devil exclaims, "Ah! I have the plan in hand!"

He looks around at all of his lieutenants, each of whom is assigned to certain individuals on earth, and gleefully instructs them: "I want you to go up and spread the idea of "tolerance." Go tell the stupid human beings up there that they should start teaching the idea that the tolerance of others is the same as the love of them. Oh yes! This is my best deception yet! It's a real killer!"

We have had sown into our minds a certain social contrivance, a convenient mechanical reaction called "tolerating" people who do not meet our approval. We "tolerate" those who don't please us or who rub us the wrong way. And we believe that our ability to tolerate another individual is the same as learning to live in harmony with him or her. Nothing could be farther from the truth!

It is through just such a deception that human beings have almost lost the possibility of being able to see how true Love is being choked out of us and off this planet. As surely as there are objects that choke the throat, there is that which chokes the soul. Now let's examine this idea and learn what it will take to remove this unnatural obstruction.

We must begin by recognizing the following truth: All forms of tolerance have their root in one form or another of resistance, a fact that should make the next truth obvious to us: We cannot resist something, be negative towards it, and be in a loving relationship with it at the same time.

Here's what this means practically speaking: When we unconsciously think "I will 'tolerate' this person by putting up with his dark manifestation, but only because I don't want anyone to see just how negative he makes me" -- then what has happened to us? We come to believe that we are "loving" because we repress our wish to lash out at whoever disturbs us.

Government and social institutions heavily promote this idea of "tolerance" to maintain the illusion of a progressive, evolving society; but to love one another has absolutely nothing whatsoever to do with harboring resistance while calling it acceptance. Resistance isolates, separates, and chokes. Love embraces, welcomes, and breathes freely. But there is more yet to see here, if we will.

The whole notion of this order of tolerance is rooted in the idea of superiority, as only a superior person tolerates an inferior human being. When we are with someone, and we must "tolerate" him or her, we are in a state of secret self-love that keeps itself in place by having that which it quietly denigrates. But this unconscious state of self is only half the limitation.

Unconscious self-superiority keeps itself in place through a process of resisting what it imagines it isn't like, but by the fact of the negative reaction proves its unseen likeness. Shakespeare said, "Methinks thou dost protest too much," because he was pointing out that what we most strongly deny in another is what we unconsciously recognize in ourselves.

The first step in harmonious relationships is simple: We need only realize the spiritual truth that we cannot meet someone whom we are not like in some way, even if we don't actively express what we don't like seeing in him or her.

The deception is that we're sure we're unlike everyone except for those who match the images we have of ourselves. And so it goes that we live from -- see our lives through the eyes of -- a kind of "self" that is in a perpetual state of resisting anyone seen as being "not like me." But Love cannot grow where resistance rules.

We're not created to resist anything; we are created to grow through everything. Resistance to life kills the process of spiritual development. When we resist what life would show us about ourselves, we effectively close the door on the Light that wants to help transform us by showing us the things we don't know we harbor in our soul.

Before we close our chat tonight I will give you a very special exercise. Just as we can be taught the Heimlich maneuver -- a swift action that can be taken to dislodge what is choking the body -- we can learn a spiritual maneuver that we may call upon every day, as often as it is necessary, to help us dislodge something that is presently choking our soul.

What do you feel like discussing? What struggles can we shed light upon that will help you grow and go higher? If you will keep your questions real, personal, and to the point -- resisting the temptation to be speculative or to otherwise ask merely curious questions -- then our time together will be extra profitable. So, let's get started. What is on your mind tonight?

Ruth: How do we actually stop our resisting? How do we know that we aren't pretending that we have… so that the resistance is actually still being perpetuated?

GF: You cannot stop your own resistance to whatever it may be, be it a thought or a condition, for the very act of wanting to bring that thought or condition to an end is a state of conflict-born resistance. It is the light of awareness, our willingness to watch ourselves and not push away the thoughts and feelings that pound on us, that brings about the change in one's consciousness. No opposite can overcome itself. Only the Light can reconcile these essential twins.

Langston: A few moments ago, I met someone. Something was not right about him, as it is with everyone I meet. I can hear all sorts of things telling me to hate that person or find some reason to think negatively towards him. I try to turn my attention inward but I cannot see where I am like that person. I do feel the pain and shaking, though. Can you please provide instruction?

GF: Are you familiar with the East Indian instrument called a Sitar? It has nine sympathetic strings that resonate with whatever dominant tones are being played by the instrument. They resonate in "sympathy" with the vibration that sets them in motion. So is it true when it comes to human beings who set us "vibrating." We wouldn't "sing" the "notes" we do around them if those "strings" weren't within us.

Ruth: One of my greatest challenges is stopping judgment -- both of myself and others. When you indicated we don't meet anyone unlike ourselves, are you saying factually that we all have faults, and that we need to recognize and accept that in ourselves and others and that may help stop "judgment"?

GF: To be a human being, as we are presently constituted, is to be something to an earth that is parched and cracked. By this metaphor I mean to imply that our present level of consciousness is so divided that it is literally the "ground" of faults. Spiritual truths, the essence of awareness of our condition, is a kind of water that mends and unifies this ground by its own nature. Every human being has degrees of the faults that all other human beings either exhibit or have found ways to mask. This is why we should "love our enemies." What we see in them reveals us to ourselves as we are, not as we dream ourselves to be.

Beatflux: Why do I feel the need to prove others wrong?

GF: There are a number of answers to your question, but all have the same essential root. There is a very distinct and equally dark sense of self that is born in any moment where we judge another. The allure of this judgment that we make is hidden in the fact that we couldn't point out how "wrong" someone is without having first consulted our own unconscious righteousness. And there's more still. Another aspect of this same dynamic is that we live with a very self-compromising belief that we are beyond reproach, especially from someone seen as being less than ourselves. This horrible condition of our divided consciousness not only keeps us a victim of our own egotistic ignorance, but effectively locks us within the cage of that same consciousness by denying the action of any corrective moment. See all of this and ponder it. The punishment of proving others wrong will end.

Beatflux: Could you please tell me what righteousness is?

GF: There is a righteousness that is born out of one's spirit being in true relationship with life wherein life itself sees and governs all around it. Then there is righteousness (the way I used it earlier) that refers to judging others from a sense of superiority born out of being unconsciously separated from life.

Ruth: You mentioned life seeing and governing all that it observes. Is life or "the life force" another name for God?

GF: You can use a word such as God or the Living Light as it pleases you. The name is of little or no consequence; our awareness of its reality is everything.

Jilly: I am beginning to see these dark forces inside us. I feel pain and I try to the best of my ability to watch the pain also. I wonder if this is "the valley of the shadow of death"? And will the pain I feel continue to try to trick me into going back?

GF: Just as with the classic idea of the "dark night of the soul," so is the "valley of the shadow of death" a metaphor of an interior event that takes place many times for the developing aspirant. Each time we see what has compromised us, some darkness in us, that moment of fear or corresponding hopelessness is not caused by the darkness itself that we have glimpsed. This moment of feeling that we are in a dark or fearful world is a reactive projection of a part of ourselves that does not want us to proceed with the process of discovery in that moment. In essence, we feel lost because our present nature has seen, perhaps for the first time, that it is lost. It keeps a hold of itself by lamenting itself, but we must let go of this same self, and proceed along and within the Light that has revealed it. Keep going.

cd: In Seeker's Guide to Self-Freedom, you wrote regarding past wreckage and healing: "Do this special kind of inner work and the healing you want will follow, which includes the healings necessary with, or in, others. This is a spiritual law." I like the idea of healing others as well as myself, Could you elaborate on your thoughts regarding spiritual law?

GF: There are certain "Invisible Eternals." By this I mean that the universe is governed by timeless principles whose laws not only support the world that we live in, but supply it at the same time with the continual and perfect equilibrium that we all live with and within. This "Balance" goes unseen, but recognized in popular ideas such as, "We reap what we sow," and "What goes around comes around." These principles point to the presence of perfect math: 2 + 2 is always 4. So is it true when it comes to our relationships with others. When Christ taught to "Love thy neighbor as thyself," he was stating this law that has to do with spiritual healing that you've asked about. When we act with kindness or compassion towards someone who has hurt us or betrayed us, as difficult as this may be to do, we are the first to receive the wholeness of our how healing act. This is always the truth. Every moment, each of us is giving out what we receive.

Jilly: I don't trust any of the answers that I give myself. It is so noisy and there is so much confusion going on in my mind. Do I just stay there and watch it?

GF: Yes. There is no need to "trust" or "not trust" one's own answers, providing that one will remain watchful and willing to see what goes on in the midst of all that mental noise. The True answers always appear to us from out of a kind of interior silence that may or may not provide us with a particular direction, but that always proves to us our True Nature was never in jeopardy to begin with.

mobilman: Could you explain about how revolving I's work and possibly some ways one might deal with them?

GF: One example of these "revolving I's" that you speak of, I write about in The Intimate Enemy. If you haven't read it, get it. I describe what I call a "TPIC" -- which stands for the "temporary person in charge". This TPIC appears in any given moment where another "I" in us -- that we'll call the temporary person in captivity -- suddenly finds itself incapable of dealing with an event it meets. In an instant, and all without seeing it, our identity moves from one who is lost, to one who now knows exactly what to do to get out of that situation. Here is a perfect example of where we don't see how one "I" in us instantly moves into a new identity that is the opposite of the one that preceded it. To see this switch of selves in operation is to cancel the suffering it perpetuates.

Jilly: Do we have thousands of TPIC's inside us? Is each TPIC unaware there are many calling itself one?

GF: TPIC's are like a tree with bigger branches that lead into smaller and smaller ones, but we need not concern ourselves with their "numbers" as the solution to the suffering they cause is always the same: the light of awareness coupled with conscious inner work. And yes, all are unaware (of each other).

likestolearn: I would really like to relocate for spiritual growth purposes but I have never even traveled (or taken a vacation for that matter). Everyone that is near and dear to me is rather conservative and will always stay here, "home." Would making this move be beneficial for me or harmful to the real loved ones in my life? They play real parts in my growth and life.

GF: If you're asking me what my personal view is of whether or not one should dedicate his or her life to their spiritual development, regardless of the cost, the answer is an unequivocal "yes." Everything else in life is temporary besides that which we find within us that is Eternal.

Jilly: In reading Maurice Nicoll, he talks about buffers being inside us to protect us from the contradiction that we have. When we are ready to SEE, then will the buffers fall away?

GF: Buffers never fall away by themselves, anymore than an iceberg melts as long as it remains in the deep north. It is the light of awareness that effectively "melts" these obstructions that are creations of an unconscious nature that seeks to protect itself from imagined nightmares.

Deepa: Anything I say (even this) feels like a lie the moment I've uttered it. Why so?

GF: This isn't an unnatural feeling, and in some respects even has truth behind it. But don't get caught up in being identified with what becomes an imagined self. We must all continually work our way through whatever conflict presents itself before us for the purpose of keeping us its captive. When we speak, let us watch ourselves speak. If we ask questions, let us be aware of the motive behind them. This awareness is enough to turn lies into Truth.

Diojeneez: If you can use the darkness to end the darkness, then why do so many saints in all religions, many of whom were conscious men, "leave the world" to embrace the hermetic or monastic life? Are there benefits to this?

GF: As challenging as this may be, try to understand that to every teaching there is a time, and a time unto every teaching. For some there may be benefits in a "monastic" life, but by and large not those who seek that life for the purpose of escaping the world around them. We cannot escape anything we fear or want something from. This is why working with "the darkness" precedes the birth of the light within us.

likestolearn: I too feel like the hermetic life is the only way sometimes and that almost everyone is much more asleep, like in a coma. I am disappointed in the world and faced with the question of this type of lifestyle... any comment please?

GF: You are correct when you assert that this is a world populated by sleeping and self-punishing beings. But what one does with such a discovery -- how one answers the ache that comes with seeing such truths -- is as important as the discovery itself. We cannot grow as long as we resist anything that we see. Resistance and self-development are antithetical. Much of what we resist we do so because of what it stirs in us. If we will see what stirs in us, we can be free of that unwanted stirring.

Bil: Having worked so long, so many times it seems I've reached "somewhere" higher, and then wind up feeling it was all imaginary. In many ways, it seems like wasted effort... seeking some illusory "place"… the same old fears and negativities returning. Any insight to quell the futility of my being on a road to nowhere?

GF: I know this will sound paradoxical, but I assure you it is positive in its meaning. It is only when at last we realize there really is nowhere for us to reach, that we at last arrive where we have always wanted to be -- with ourselves, in ourselves, and all sustained by a Spirit that awaited our realization of its perfectly present presence.

Jilly: In this month's Tape of the Month, you talk about the four natural states of the mind. The third one, prayer, you talk about how if you don't pray, the mind will go into negative images, etc. Is this form of prayer the same as awareness?

GF: Awareness of oneself, conscious and active attention to the moment, is in itself a form of prayer. One reason being that when we are fully with ourselves, we are in the only position where it is possible to see the effect of what we are connected to in that same moment. It is consciousness of this connection (which is usually of the unconscious kind) that changes at once what we are in relationship with for having seen our actual condition.

likestolearn: In your last chatroom, a participant asked about a writing that stated something like "mere pills will not keep me alive, and metal discs [money] will not affect my life." This rings true but I cannot ignore the fact of common medicine I use on a regular basis just to get along. I need this or something to help my condition and allow me to live normally. Should I pursue natural or spiritual means to cure what ails me?

GF: There is an idea called the Golden Mean. It refers to the middle path, or what we will simply call a naturally balanced life. Find out for yourself what's the best path for you with regards to all possibilities, including what medicines you use. The best approach is always the one in which we are conscious participants.

Likestolearn: Despite growing and becoming happier almost daily, I can't seem to get past my money troubles (serious past debt, maintaining employment, etc.). I believe it is largely in part because of this sick world and its systems that are greed-based and loveless. Lack of monetary flexibility is stopping me from a lot. What am I doing wrong?

GF: Learning what it takes to become a responsible householder is a pre-requisite to one's continuing development. Keeping employment should be as simple as breathing, as should be the ability to supply oneself with a simple life through the dollars earned. Clear up your debts; this is mandatory. Persist.

cd: In a recent falling out with a relationship, I struggle with the difference in "understanding" and blaming myself for it all in trying to learn my piece of the "wrong." How do I learn from the disaster without blaming myself (which only causes more pain)? I want to see the truth about myself, and about him as well. I face his cruelty and rejection every day, which has taught me a lot, in between incredible pain. I can't make "things" right.

GF: I understand your concern and conflict here, so let me explain something that may help you with this situation and others that may appear in the future. We cannot learn where we have erred in any relationship by thinking back upon that relationship. The real correction comes with being conscious of ourselves in the moment of a self-compromising act. This shock of seeing ourselves changes ourselves instantly, whereas considering ourselves through memory only keeps this problem nature in place.

digger: What is a good answer to someone who says that my work to become more aware and to understand myself better sounds selfish?

GF: It's impossible to answer people such as those who would accuse us of being selfish for our very wish to transcend our own selfish nature.

Beatflux: Does peer pressure only exist when a person wants approval?

GF: Yes.

alc4: I have difficulty formulating questions to ask for spiritual guidance, while at the same time I remain confused about it all. Why this contradiction?

GF: It takes time for our "usual" mind to begin formulating ideas around what stimulates our mind yet to be realized. This is natural and should not be a stumbling block. Take one idea, one only, and develop it. Think through the question until what you wish to be clear about is truly clear to you. Such knowledge of problems is their solution.

dudeman: Is it possible to have a meaningful relationship with a person who is not on your level of this work? Will she always have difficulties due to the fact she is a woman and subject to extreme emotional ways of thinking? (No offense to the ladies.)

GF: No, not only is it possible for such a relationship to flourish, but you can help each other to the degree you are willing to discover each other's nature in action. Extreme emotions only upset a man who is unbalanced emotionally. His reaction is his proof of the need to work with what he has been gifted with in his partner.

digger: Is there a way to translate this work to society and to government? Or is this work always internal?

GF: Not only is this Work always and only internal, but it was never intended to be embraced by the masses.

Taiji: Why isn't it for the masses?

GF: Much in the same way as a chick needs the yolk-sack in order to develop and fulfill its destiny, so does what is True and Light-ful need what is false and dark for its revelation. The masses have what they treasure, and are incapable of wanting anything higher than their presently unenlightened mind. If you doubt this, ask yourself why Christ told his disciples to leave the "dead to bury the dead."

James1: We are to use "what is false and dark"? Am I understanding this correctly? Please elaborate.

GF: We are created to (be able to) turn "darkness into Light" by bringing these forms of incomplete life forces into conscious awareness. All negative states and their inherent forms are fodder for the mill of the self-working man or woman.

Diojeneez: What is the difference between humility and arrogance disguised as humility? It can be tricky (sometimes) distinguishing the two.

GF: What is the difference between a king snake and a coral snake? The answer is, one is a friend and eliminates harmful pests, the other is poisonous and always bites the hand that picks it up.

Langston: Can you give us something to remember in those times where darkness declares: "You don't need any more Truth classes, you understand everything needed to grow, so stop studying"? This declaration is quite subtle and/or overwhelming.

GF: Did you know that one of the most powerful of all spiritual exercises is the simple act of self-honesty? If someone walks up to you and tells you, "Langston, you are the essence of love," you would know in a moment that that person was a liar, a cheat, and a fraud because you know, or at least sense, some of the truth of your present nature. Meet darkness' voices with honesty and they will disappear.

Langston: This sure is a tricky, nagging condition. When I read your answer I heard a question ask: "Yeah, but when is it okay to stop going to Truth classes?"

GF: The man who loves the Truth never asks when does this Love reach its fruition; he knows there is always a greater Love to be known and embraced.

Daniel22: Why do people have a fear of success? Why do some people sabotage themselves when things start going well?

GF: The question shouldn't be, "Why do people have fear of success?" but rather why do people live with fear at all? Once you understand this, you will know the true meaning of success, and there will be no fear in it, regardless of its nature.

dudeman: Should we meditate on and ponder the idea of scale? Almost everything I can see seems to be in scale. When fathoming the size of outer space and it energetic forces, I get an almost cold, insignificant feeling, and feel like a mere dust particle that does not really matter. Please advise.

GF: The pondering of scale is essential in our fulfillment of our spiritual possibility. Pay no attention to whatever troubles you when you consider yourself in relationship to what you see within your mind. The very parts of us that seem to make us feel inconsequential are secretly enlarging us.

reynard: From reading your books I see the truth that organized religion isn't the answer... however since I've been raised a Jehovah's Witness and have strong conditioning in my background, I am still feeling the need to associate with a group of "Christians." What are your thoughts?

GF: The need for relationship along the True Path is an essential one. There is no rule or law that says one must not spend any time with any particular group, be they this or that orientation. Stay awake and watch how you feel around those you spend time around. Your awakening nature will change the company you value by itself, and lead you at the same time to those nearer the new truth stirring in your heart.

mick: I do not enjoy a job I've been at for some time now. My thoughts "think" I should be happy wherever I am (Mr. Howard said something to this end). Surely he didn't mean to stay at a job I feel is not for me? Maybe I'm clinging (wrongly) to what he said because I'm scared to leave. Your comment please.

GF: There are two words along the spiritual path that never lose their significance or power. They are -- "risk it!" Only action reveals the secret cause of confusion and inaction in such cases.

Diojeneez: Lao-tse says that when you align yourself with the Integral Way, you eliminate the "illusory boundaries between darkness and light." Are the boundaries between light and darkness illusory?

GF: Yes! In much the same way as night and day exist within one another.

Diojeneez: Isn't unconsciousness darkness and consciousness light? Are you saying there is no difference between them?

GF: In the "end" all is Light; but from "outside" this understanding "darkness" exists and is real for the purposes of revealing the Light and its life-transformative properties.

MikeS: Why do I feel like I'm in a hurry to find what is Eternal before I die?

GF: All anxiety is a lie. The catch is to recognize the difference between an essential need born of an interior wish for real relationship with the Divine versus the flash and fire of a desire whose sole purpose is to keep us in its service, and keeping IT eternal. Recognize this difference if you can. Simply drop the anxious self and what you seek is already there.

dudeman: Is there a way in which to help and teach children in this work without shielding them from the necessary life events they need to learn from? How can one raise kids with this trueness?

GF: We can do no different than we do with ourselves. And as we grow in spirit and in understanding, that very light not only protects us from what is dark and punishing, but it extends a certain kind of protection to all who are around us who depend upon us.

dudeman: So just being in our company is good for them and will help them automatically?

GF: IF you are working for and within the Good, what else can happen? But just because you may be attracted to the Light does not mean someone else will.

Daniel22: I am new to your books. Is there a "best" one to start with ?

GF: I would suggest that you choose between either of these two titles that attracts you the most: Design Your Destiny or The Intimate Enemy. Both are filled with helpful insights and encouraging truths.

James1: We seem to be constantly searching for inspiration in any form, but it mostly translates to us in feeling. Physically speaking, is there a sensation you can describe when we are in the Moment? Or is it something you'll know when you get there?

GF: Sensation exists because resistance produces it. When we are awake and aware in the moment, to that degree there is no resistance, which means that sensation as one knows it is not present. But just as there are higher emotions, so there exists a higher presence within oneself that need not know itself through or by sensation.

Diojeneez: Vernon Howard used a very interesting example in saying, "The speed of a man in a rowboat depends upon how deeply he dips his oars." What would constitute deeply dipping our oars while on the esoteric path?

GF: The degree to which we will risk what we mechanically assume is valuable in favor of what we sense is truthful and right for our development.

Mobilman: Not sure where I got this but is it right that we learn the right decision by suffering the wrong decision, or is there a such thing as a wrong decision?

GF: Action purifies knowledge, turning it into Wisdom.

Diojeneez: There is a story in the Catholic faith of a man named Saint Martin who one day gave up his own clothes to clothe a beggar. Everyone laughed at him. The same night, in his sleep (it is said) he had a vision of Jesus amid a crowd of angels saying, "This man gave me his robe!" Is this the esoteric meaning of "do unto the least of your brothers as we would unto Him"?

GF: Yes; it is a simple story to illustrate a complex idea most often misinterpreted as being about "giving to the poor," etc.

steveb: Are there tapes available of Guy's TV show?

GF: Contact Chris through our website and she will give you complete details.

GF: As discussed in the opening comments, to one degree or another we are conditioned to be "tolerant" of others. This kind of tolerance is rooted in an unconscious form of resistance; all such psychological resistance is a form of separation, and separation is isolation. Isolation corrupts the soul because it is shut off from the vital mix of elements created to transform its nature.

The human being is created to develop in the "likeness" of that marvelous Intelligence that made us. This Divine Intelligence didn't create anything that it fears or hates. It's a ridiculous thought to walk around and believe (as we all do because of the strong sense of self that it produces) that another person is our enemy simply because we feel enmity for him or her.

Now don't be mistaken, there are plenty of unpleasant people; our world is packed with them! But, given the negative effect of resenting others, and the fact that (for now) all we know to do towards those who disturb us is to resist them, could it be that when it comes to our human relationships we have been blinded to one of the main reasons for them? The answer is "yes."

Just as the wind moves through a tree and carries its pollen to the blossoms of another tree, our relationships are intended to be pollinations. They are intended to act as conditions for us that create between us the possibility of understanding that, in reality, there is no such thing as this separate self that lives only to create what it must then tolerate!

Now, for the special spiritual exercise I mentioned in my opening remarks -- the practice designed to develop harmonious human relationships. Remember that the point of this study and the new understanding it reveals is to help us get past the unconscious thinking that we can do something against ourselves and expect a positive outcome.

This idea of tolerating human beings can't possibly be the seed of something celestial. This part of us that has become a master of tolerating those whom we can't stand has come to be as strong and prevalent as it is because of how superior it makes us feel when we are around them. This unconscious self-righteousness is not an act of love, but a form of hatred; it is a weakness.

Here is the swift action we can take to dislodge the darkness that is choking our soul and its possibility of understanding the nature of true Love: This exercise is called the "You-I Maneuver." You can work with it every moment of the day, whether you're with people or you're sitting alone and thinking about someone.

To employ this maneuver effectively, you will need to be as sensitive in your interactions with other people as a spider web is to the slightest breeze. You can do this because your True Nature is created to be just this sensitive. Any energy that touches us sets off a resonance within us that we are created to be conscious of as it moves through us.

When we're around other people, and start to have a negative reaction toward them, what we don't catch is what occurs within us before it occurs to us that we must tolerate this person. In this moment an unregistered resistance impresses itself upon our soul, and from it takes shape a reaction that always begins with the word "you"-- as in "You are this," or "You are that."

There is this instant sense of separation between one's self and the person one is with; and from this is born an actual surge of pressure that surfaces inside of us that has identified the one outside of us as being the cause of our sense of conflict. But now we are beginning to know better than to blame another for the negative states revealed in us.

So in this same moment when we look at that person and feel this pejorative word "you" start to take shape, we are going to add the word "I" to it: Now it's "You-I." Inwardly you will be working to realize by this new expression something like this: "You . . . I have seen the exact same character in me."

For instance if an angry person comes to you, instead of tolerating his or her negative state, work with this maneuver like this: "You . . . I have seen the exact same anger in me."

This exercise is good for any negative manifestation you react to in another, so that you never allow the momentum of the negative "you" that is produced through intolerance to exist without understanding that the "you" that resists only resists seeing evidence of itself (through the life of another).

In that moment we disarm the lie of the "superior" self and steal from it its corrupting power to produce the illusion that we are different from the people we tolerate. And in the collapse of that opposite, Love and compassion are born. I can no longer treat you as someone to be "tolerated"; I realize the fact that you and I really are "neighbors" because we share a common pain.

Here is a summary of the exercise called the "You-I Maneuver." We need a new intention in all of our relationships, something like this: I will not suffer you; I will suffer us. I will not cast you out as being something inferior to myself; I will not do that because I can't recognize in you anything as being an inferior condition in you unless I have it in myself.

Our work, if we're willing, is to catch that surging separation called "you are different from me." And then, in that same moment, to apply our new understanding that cancels this unconscious act of resistance. Instead we embrace the realization that "you" and "I" are both exposed in this God-given moment that God meant for the purpose of transcending ourselves.

Remember that "tolerance" is a lie because it produces a "me" that is always apart from what I am tolerating. There cannot be Love where there is separation. Work at the "You-I Maneuver." Learn to watch this low-level self that is trying to destroy the possibility of Love awakening in us.

Risk leaving yourself open by refusing to identify with the parts of yourself that would have you believe that resisting Life can lead to being embraced by it. Do the inner work it takes to make this exercise personally meaningful and you will understand the greatest secret on earth: everyone on it has a gift just for you -- if you will only take it.

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GF: Welcome everyone. Before we begin tonight I would like to help shed some light on a subtle but significant idea concerning what I call the "circle of self." We will examine the secret mechanism in us that drives us through certain unconscious life cycles where, in moments of crisis, we think we are making wise choices, only to realize we have chosen against ourselves once again.

To begin, we must examine two important ideas: first, that the most vital moments in our lives occur when we are most conscious of ourselves, when we are fully present to all of the lessons this same moment brings into our awareness. It is in these moments that transformation of self and awareness of self are as one movement.

The second idea is equally important. As a rule these moments in question, where we are enabled to transcend ourselves, occur during those times in our lives when something "unwanted" happens to us. It is for this conflict we feel with life that we are more or less made to become conscious of both the disturbance and ourselves at once.

This discovery holds many implications. If it's true that self-transformation is facilitated by moments of heightened self-awareness -- and that this higher consciousness stands in sharp contrast to what must be our "usual" state of being -- then we should inquire into the nature of this lower level of consciousness whose presence seems to preclude the possibility of real self-change.

Let's put two and two together. A disturbance comes along in our lives and leads us to see ourselves in a new light. So what is it that has been disturbed in us by the frontrunner of this necessary life lesson? The answer is surprising: We are momentarily pulled away from and out of the habitual flow of our own mechanical thoughts and feelings. Let's look at this idea more closely.

Moments before that unwanted shock of reality whereby we see life anew, our thoughts and feelings seemed to be the light; after all, we followed their course; their guidance we accepted blindly. It's only in those vital moments in the midst of the disturbance, as the lesson in it is received, that we see we had been living in the darkness of ourselves. We had been deceived.

Can we take the "leap" here? Can we see from these first few lessons the startling truth about what is required if we want to help make truly positive changes in our lives? Let me spell it out: If higher awareness is our partner in realizing our True Self, and life's disturbances serve to bring us into its company, then we should learn to welcome these disturbances in our lives!

When I brought this idea up at a recent meeting with several students, they responded to it much as I imagine you are right about now: "Hold on a second. I've spent my whole life trying to avoid disturbances. Now you're saying to invite them in! What in the world are you talking about?"

Instead of instantly closing our mind to this new idea, let's explore it together. Let's see why common disturbances in our lives can help us unlock the higher consciousness we all long to know. With willingness to learn the truth about ourselves as our guide, we ask the following question: What's the first thing that happens in the moment in which we are disturbed?

I think we can all agree that our first response to any moment of feeling disturbed is an involuntary surge of thoughts and feelings whose basic cry is "Don't disturb me!" After all, it seems "only human" to resist those moments where something disturbs us. Which brings us to this next logical question in our exploration: "Who" or what is it within us that does not want to be disturbed?

This question may sound silly at first; but let's not judge too quickly. For while it seems more than obvious that it is "I" who doesn't want to be disturbed, this isn't the whole story. If we will dare to look more closely, this is what we see: This sense of "I" in us that resists the disturbance is born out of being identified with the "status-quo" of our own habitual thoughts and feelings.

It is this sense of self that's woven from the fiber of repeated thoughts and feelings that does want not to be disturbed. And when life naturally moves left or right -- falling out of step with whatever dream parade we may be marching in at that time -- this self gets "tripped up" and we fall down. Clearly we have mistaken our thoughts and feelings for being the same as our True Self.

Yes, it goes without saying that we spend more time with these thoughts and feelings than with anyone or anything else. In one sense they are our closest "friends." They not only tell us what we should do and how we should feel, but they define and direct our lives as a result of this assumed identity. But let's be clear: We are not them.

We are an individual being with multiple features; so that even though one's True Self includes the world of his or her thoughts and feelings, our True Self dwells effortlessly "above" them. The resistance we feel to life's disturbing moments comes when reality contradicts what our thoughts and feelings tell us we need to be whole and happy.

In other words, we resist whatever we do because our thoughts and feelings "tell" us that things should not be as they are. Upon hearing these laments within us -- that our mind justifies with its backlog of reasons -- what choice have we but to start feeling angry or sorry for ourselves? Now we feel bad for what an uncaring world has done to us; and this is where things get really interesting.

Whom do we turn to for answers on how to get rid of this unwanted feeling? We turn to our own thoughts and feelings, to the same self whose dream has been disturbed, to tell us what to do to escape the pain come over us. And please keep in mind that this present pain wouldn't even exist for us were it not for having listened to this same self tell us last time how we could live disturbance-free!

And what do these thoughts tell us to do to get rid of the ache we are in? They tell us to go get something, go fix someone, get rid of something. In short, we are suddenly sure of what we either need to go do or become in order to free ourselves of this suffering. In other words, in all such moments as these we are given something new to desire.

In case it isn't already clear, what disturbed us the first time, and gave rise to our "new" desire, is that life itself came along and shook up our established sense of self that had been identified with former desires. So that when reality shifted, we shook. What we need to see is that this self that shakes is not real. Otherwise the cycle starts all over again.

Just before the end of tonight's chat I will finish these thoughts and offer you some new ideas and insights about specific ways we can work inwardly to walk away from this circle of self and the unconscious desires that drive it along.

What would you like to talk about tonight? Have you been working on some special condition within yourself and need some clarification? Let's get started with your questions and see what happens. Please do keep your questions and comments to real issues. Speculative thinking and other philosophical meanderings are meaningless if real self-change is our wish.

What do you want to discuss? What's on your mind? Let's get started!

Shady: So in a sense you are saying the disturbances in our lives help us learn our true nature, and the exciting part of the disturbance itself is that we will learn we can walk anywhere, through anything, and be?

GF: That's precisely what I'm saying -- that lessons in life that transform us ride in on the back of events, and that these events are always for our development if we will see through our negative reaction to them for the Truth that provided the lesson now before us.

Shady: If we looked at disturbances differently then we have in the past, we might quit trying to avoid them and see them as life-giving experiences? I can see that I have been programmed to wrong thinking, and with that comes many disturbances. So if we accept each disturbance, then it will teach us something more about who we are, right?

GF: This is essentially correct. Once we recognize that there is no moment in which we cannot be aware of ourselves, and that this awareness itself relates us to every movement of life, inward or outward, then the whole of life, including its disturbances, acts like a beautiful mirror in which we may both explore and discover ourselves.

Shady: Sometimes in the middle of a disturbance, a lie comes to you that where you are you are (1) not where you belong, and (2) you are picking up more selves here. Then confusion sets in. Do you have any comments?

GF: Confusion cannot present itself to us as a meaningful negative state without there being within us, prior to its onset, a certain unconscious assumption that we already know, or at least should know, the meaning of the event we are in. The whole point of self-observation and awareness is for a process of revelation within us, not as something that we use to prove ourselves or our knowledge in that same moment. Just watch without "willing."

Grayson: Concerning the disturbances you have just talked about, can we use past disturbances, from when we were not yet awake, to remember and relive them, and thus create a whole new experience of them now, vanquishing the original inner experience?

GF: The only time it is possible for any of us to change is in the moment the event transpires. All consideration of events past are merely the reliving of dead images vivified with stored sensations. Drop any concerns over any disturbances from your past that appear and ask you to deal with them. In Truth, these times are dead and our best approach is to be dead to them.

Bev: This is completely on target for me! My life lately has been a seemingly unending string of "unwanted events" -- in a BIG way. Prior to your comments, I kept thinking God was trying to teach me something, or worse, that He is punishing me for something (à la Old Testament Job!). It's hard to get knocked down so many times and "keep perspective."

GF: If we can only remember the following, our lives will be filled with new understanding: The only thing that gets knocked down by an activity expressed in the present moment, is an unconscious structure made up of our own past preferences that we are identified with. The new moment is an invitation and an emissary of Truth, not an adversary the way our false nature presently views disturbances and their necessary lessons.

Bev: Gee, though, couldn't Truth be satisfied with ONE huge negative event at once? Why is there the need to pound away with multiple events at the same time... I guess Truth wants the message to get through to me loudly and clearly!

GF: If you will continue to work with these principles, I promise you that one day the whole idea of a negative event will simply cease to exist to you.

Bev: One other thought for me on this: I can even see when I am having an emotional reaction to something that it is more "the dream" of something that I am reluctant to let go of than the thing itself. The "dream" is so powerful it becomes hard to distinguish between what is real and what is imagined. Is this some of what happens with the false self?

GF: It can be accurately said that the false self lives entirely in imagination. The nature of this imagination is the thoughts and feelings that pass through the mind that, as they form, call into existence a "self" that knows itself by considering these same images. These images are loaded with familiar sensations, good and bad, and the self that receives these impressions knows itself accordingly.

lilcanuk: Are not dreams also another way of expressing one's self?

GF: If you're not familiar with the New Testament, there's a passage in Corinthians from St. Paul. He says, "Our hopes should be in things unseen, for who hopes for things seen?" When we realize at last that all dreams belong to the finite world -- because they are creations of thought and emotion -- then we cease to dream a self into existence, because we know that the self that we long to be cannot be measured or defined by any dream.

nowishow: I am in a place within my industry that is about to "explode" and change the industry and limit almost all the competition. Because I'm just a "small timer" I may very well be passed over or excluded unfairly. I've taken rejection and understood it was not God's will, but this seems wrong. How do I see the good of losing an honest chance to help myself and family?

GF: Such questions are always challenging when we find ourselves beset upon by a world in which we have ourselves set a goal to become something out of the ordinary. We all need to learn what it means to "do" what's in our power and to refuse to get caught up struggling with what's not. As best you can, work for the dream you have but don't let ambition become the source of an endless ache as it sets you against those who you feel have set themselves against you. It isn't in your power to make others decent or act properly. It is in your power to walk away from the self-compromising -- and ultimately self-destructive -- states of anger or resentment that flood in to blame others, all for the sake of giving you a sense of being in control.

ruthann: Oh, please explain how we have the power "to walk away from the self-compromising and self-destructive states such as anger and resentment"! I try to stop the states, but I don't succeed.

GF: It is not (and must not become) a question of trying to "stop" these states. The issue is that no one will leave behind something that they find of value. Consciousness of these states -- not resistance to them -- is the needed medicine, as only our seeing what they do within us, to us, can lead to letting go (of them).

mobilman: Recently there was a change in my ATM card and pin number. A small thing, right, but there was a type of crisis in it. There was anger and something telling me why I needed to fight with the bank over this. But I did something different this time. I accepted the change and the whole crisis fell away. Comments?

GF: One of the principle lessons behind all True spiritual teachings has to do with the idea that "resistance to the disturbance is the disturbance." This means that when we will simply let a thought that comes up in us, whose presence creates conflict, go its merry way without unconsciously interacting with it, not only does the problem disappear, but the self that was troubled goes with it.

heather: I want to know why when I am upset I want to go buy something? It always makes me feel better, for the time being, but for awhile it caused lots of problems.

GF: This is difficult to grasp, but you'll see the Good of it if you'll work with the following idea: Our present nature is not a unified being. It is a series of alternating selves, each of which rushes to the foreground when the one before it either runs out of steam or meets an insurmountable object. In essence, we buy things (we don't need) when we're upset because a certain self jumps in to try and please the pained self, and does nothing more than cause more pain. This is why only self-understanding can heal us.

Grayson: When someone "relives" an old negative experience, is it the original "I" that came up during the original experience that has resurfaced now? Thus has the original "I" lived on inside the person, festering over time?

GF: There is no such original "I" as you've described as existing within any act of re-living one's life. Certain negative states, particularly when they have been relived and relived, do take on a form of self-consciousness in us that one might say becomes a negative "I" in that person. But apart from that phenomenon, the reliving of old experiences is the function of old "tapes" within us simply playing when something in life turns on the mental machine.

Grayson: Can it be true that our subconscious, or unconscious, is made up of things from our past, from infancy onward, that we once took in wholeheartedly as reality, and have buried themselves within us, even if we consciously know they are not real now?

GF: There are such creatures in one's unconsciousness, but they are only aspects, not the basis.

ruthann: I am appreciative to discuss real issues: I am caring for my mother-in-law, and I am going back-and-forth between the feelings of being highly used by her, and truly knowing that is such a "low" feeling, then going to my unfortunately rather consistent feeling of "hating" myself. Please advise.

GF: We must all learn what it means to discharge our duties without always trying to find something in them by which to know ourselves, for either the better or worse. If you must take care of her, what difference does it make what she does toward you, other than drive you crazy trying to figure out how to change in her what can't be changed? Use the relationship to release yourself from the parts of yourself that get caught in these dark dialogues.

Grayson: When someone does not want to work on a required project, or even go to work, is it only the personal thoughts OF the work and not the work itself that one really fears experiencing?

GF: Essentially it is never the thing itself, whatever that thing may be, that we fear in life. No fear, of a psychological nature, exists without the unconscious influence of images produced by negative imagination that one has become identified with.

Grayson: When someone wants to complete a project, but in the present does not want to work on it, is it a spiritual exercise to push through the mental and emotional resistance and get started?

GF: Only if he or she can use their resistance consciously.

cd: Working through how I deal with conflict, I get confused when to stay quiet and when to try and work it out with the other person. Am I compromising myself to want to work it out? I try and listen to see if it is fear that is motivating it, but I get confused again.

GF: Your question indicates that you recognize that most of the time when we want to "work out" our differences with someone, it's because we fear the outcome of leaving it as it is. On the other hand, one must learn to work in the opposites with others. Your life, if you'll use it so, is a grand experiment in consciousness and its development. Do not do what fear tells you to do, but neither should you be afraid to be a peacemaker, if that's the role called for.

cd: I fear leaving it as is and I also fear trying to make peace… that's why I have let it be. It's always that "what if something I could say would make it better?" that keeps its hold on me.

GF: One last lesson when it comes to all relationships that are stressful for whatever reasons: Most of the time we are far better off bearing and then dying to our own sense of discomfort than we are trying to relieve that through a false action to try and make the other person feel not disturbed. This cannot be done, even though it appears like it works. Use the tension as a springboard for self-study, and you will see changes in both you and your partner.

Diojeneez: Lao-tse says that the mind, "once calmed, naturally expands, and ultimately one's mind becomes as vast and immeasurable as the night sky." How interesting! What does it mean?

GF: It means literally what is said, but I'll add a point for clarification. Awareness is the true medium of comprehension of all things in creation. The more awake one is within this higher awareness, the more that person effortlessly lives in a kind of unity with what is unbounded before their eyes, as well as their own thoughts. This is a great truth and a great invitation to all who accept it.

BNevrgivup: This higher self you speak of, is it the condition of absolute awareness between suspended thought?

GF: Your description would be one way to define what is essentially a different and higher order of our own being. One can think of higher awareness relative to thought as being similar to the waters of an ocean through which all manner of fish swim. The fish change position, but the water never loses itself because of the movement through it.

nowishow: I am in my first few years of this wonderful work and doing great! I am wondering where do you and others like yourself get your energy to stay on the path seemingly every second? Am I doing something wrong when I feel like I am not up for hearing /learning more at times, or am I just at some sort of standstill?

GF: Each of us has in us a certain undiscovered well of vital and ever-new energy. This well-spring is the foundation of the present moment, and our relationship to it all depends upon the degree to which we are receptive to what the present moment is trying to impress upon us. The more conscious we are of ourselves, as we are, in the now, the more we see that is true about both ourselves and the now. This Truth is the water in this well, and it never runs dry.

Floyd: What are the active, passive, and reconciling forces that desire is comprised of?

GF: The best answer to your question would be for one to become a truly interested observer of his or her own desires. The intellectual explanation serves very little when it doesn't correspond to direct understanding through experience. I will mention however that desires, regardless of their nature, are always the expression of the activity of the opposites. One's conditioning modifies the form. No opposite can cancel itself, and forms never stop rising in the mind asleep to itself.

Grayson: Is one reason that we really want to go along with our thoughts the fear that our thoughts will grow and grow and become too uncomfortable to bear?

GF: The principle reason that one unconsciously consents to "go along with" his or her thoughts is because there is no one there, other than another set of thoughts, thought of as being "self," that are identified with the original set of thoughts. This can be either -- in the so-called positive way, or through resistance to the thought.

Eric: I heard Mr. Howard say the most amazing thing on one of his tapes. He said that I am able to recognize Truth because of the Truth already put into me by Truth itself. Truth alone can recognize Truth. Would you say that there is a very deep meaning and an important significance to this idea? It seems to connect with the idea of not interfering with what you observe in yourself.

GF: This Truth that you have stated, once understood by us, becomes an unsinkable ally and friend in the truest meaning of the word. When we finally realize that it is impossible for us to know anything that doesn't already dwell within, we are well on our way to a new and whole consciousness.

Diojeneez: Saint Catherine of Siena said, "All the way to heaven is heaven, because He said, "I am the way.'" What exactly is she saying?

GF: The wise and awakened through the ages have all passed along the essential same message and invitation: The kingdom of heaven, the realm of Living Light, pure Mind, dwells here, now, and within each and every one of us. There is no time in which this understanding is reached. Therefore, the whole way to heaven is taken while walking through heaven that one just doesn't recognize is heaven.

nowishow: I use artificial cosmetic coverings to preserve my natural youthful appearance. I've grown accustomed to it but I know I should be free from it. Is it wrong to aim for this when nature happens to do something different in my case? I honestly feel I would not do this if I were 10-15 years older.

GF: Nothing that any human being is compelled to do can ever lead to freedom and happiness. You know what you must do. Do it! Face the fear and you will realize that all you're looking at when you see something that you "don't want to see" is a set of conditioned thoughts and feelings, whose very presence in you is not only a punishment, but is producing the very aging that you resist.

Poppy: I was in a car accident and had a experience not of this world (near death experience). Everything that I experienced made this world non-existent. What we call paradoxes in this world, I was a part of there. At first I was very disturbed that I was nothing and this earth world did not exist. Now I am curious and want to find out more. Who am I really? I want to find these answers. How do I find these answers without having to start from scratch?

GF: If you did see what you have reported, then there is nothing in the universe, besides developing your spiritual nature and its understanding, that will ever truly satisfy you again. If a man or a woman has a glimpse of a world without opposites, and yet that contains all opposing forms, he or she would be like a person who had not had a drink of water for 30 years and suddenly saw in the distance a cool pool. Persist with your wish to know consciously the world you accidentally entered.

Poppy: How do I get to that place were I was silence and my every desire was fulfilled because I was absent of desire and I was everything and nothing at the same time except that time did not exist? I tried meditating but all I have become aware of is that my mind is constantly talking and never shuts up, or I fall asleep. How do I speed up the process so that I know myself as I truly am? Mostly I am confused.

GF: I do understand what you are saying, and I want to encourage you. But I also want you to understand that a lasting awakened life is never the result of an accident. We must work within ourselves if we would realize the reality that lies hidden in us. You might find some welcome help in a tape entitled "Preparing Yourself to Answer God's Invitation." This is tape #220 in our on-line bookstore. If it doesn't help you, do return it for a full refund.

AJ: What is the purpose of life here on earth?

GF: It is for the development of the soul through a relationship with an indwelling Spirit, and everything this entails.

BNevrgivup: Your books and lessons have changed my life, because I now have a clear understanding of how we think..."opposites." The only thing left is to face my imagined fearful circumstances. Your comments on fear would be helpful.

GF: The power that fear holds over us is that while the conditions that cause this fear are fully imagined, the sensations these imaginations produce in us are real. One must learn to use what we'll call "Higher Reason" when faced with a moment of whether to risk his fear or not. True self-knowledge allows us to act from what we know is true, as opposed to acting from a reaction to negative sensations that are defining us. Risk it!

cd: I have a hard time grasping what you mean by "opposites." Is there something that could clarify what that means?

GF: Understanding the opposites is important to your work to understand yourself and its hidden workings. One example of these hidden opposites that hold us in their workings is when, being afraid of someone, we feign strength by being aloof. The desire we enact is not ours but comes to us from the opposite of what we enact. For more on this subject I would suggest reading some of the related materials in Seekers Guide to Self Freedom.

ruthann: I intellectually understand that I need to release myself from the parts of myself that are caught in "dark dialogues." Am I correct in thinking that they are the thoughts and feelings that are the false selves that you are discussing tonight?

GF: One of the predominant ways in which our present sense of self is produced in us is through being identified with these familiar thoughts and feelings about either our enemies or loved ones. Freedom from this kind of psychological captivity comes as we recognize that we are captives not of exterior conditions, but of our own unexplored consciousness.

Diojeneez: Vernon Howard said, "This will sound dreadful to you, but it's part of my warning. If your Light goes out ONCE through your arrogance, your stupidity, your carelessness, you will never ever know or remember that you once had it." Don't people fall asleep by carelessness and catch themselves sleeping all the time? No one can be perfectly conscious, right?

GF: Mr. Howard was trying to illuminate a certain and definite stage in a person's relationship with darkness in him or her. It is when one finally agrees with the will of what is essentially "wicked," that he or she loses this Light because now the darkness in them sees darkness in them as being the light. Where would one go when one is fully lost, believing he has found the way out?

Floyd: What is the root fear (or root desire) beneath the fear of making personal connections (i.e., fear of making eye contact, etc.)? What are we afraid of? What are we desiring?

GF: The root fear when it comes to personal relationships has to do with the fear of that person not recognizing or acknowledging you as you want to be seen or believe yourself to be. We feel threatened in relationships with others, casual or intimate, because of how strongly vested our sense of self is with the images that we hold of ourselves. Images are only capable of imagined relationships.

nowishow: Can we really know so much about laws and awareness to the point where we stop attracting ALL the bad things we once did? Is this how people have great revelations and discover (secrets) of the universe, or is there any awareness besides thoughts that pass through us?

GF: I assure you that not only is it possible for us to understand the great laws that govern our existence, but that we can "know" them so well that we cease to exist as individuals outside of that existence upon whom life seems to be acting indiscriminately. Persist with your studies.

Nowishow: What I mean is how can I become more receptive/aware? I pay attention and yet feel like I'm hitting some sort of ceiling.

GF: Who hits the ceiling but the one trying to escape the floor? All obstacles are imagined limitations of the mind that has set for itself a certain place it wants to reach. In real life no such place exists, nor the self kept from it. Watch without wanting. Watch without wanting.

Johnny-T: I have noticed a sometimes strong resentment towards my best friend's six year old. The kid is spoiled and selfish, manipulative, and plays it for all it's worth. Why am I mentally feuding with a child?

GF: It's extraordinary, isn't it? Did you know that most adults have a secret fear of children because children don't play to the adults' images of themselves? But as far as this resentment towards the child, here's a great Truth that we all need to see more deeply: We cannot resist or resent anything in anyone that it is not an unconscious feature in ourselves. Our resentment acts as a buffer, keeping us from being aware of our own condition that is similar to what we have to "suffer" in another.

Diojeneez: Gurdjieff said something a little shocking! He said, "I am under no laws but God's. Do you really think that you would starve if you did not have a stack of green paper and a pile of metal discs? You really think a small round pellet or some fluid pushed through your veins wards off disease and death? Dismiss all magical beliefs today. God's laws forever give and never take." Could that really be true!?

GF: It is the Truth, the whole Truth, and nothing but the Truth.

Johnny-T: These ideas are sometimes presented as God being a state of mind, and people often draw parallels from their thoughts, to the Bible and what it is saying. We cannot twist God and His word to our interpretation like a theoretical debate in which we are biased. Any comment?

GF: God is not a "state if mind," and -- as you said -- He is "unsearchable." Concepts are traps as long as they are not recognized as being descriptions of reality. We are confined by the extent to which we define our own consciousness and God as its source.

Johnny-T: Is it wrong to borrow money from person(s) who did not earn it or who obtained it from less than honest ways? History is full of this and even our own government has done this. I do not know if I am trying to rationalize my desires or over-analyzing because of fear.

GF: William Shakespeare said it best: "Neither a borrower nor a lender be; for loan oft loseth both itself and friend." This truth applies everywhere and in all things, including one's spiritual life.

heather: I would like to know why I (at age 51) feel that I can't live in a traditional marriage anymore and want more independence and not to be so controlled?

GF: Only you can know these things, and anyone who tells you reasons betrays you.

James1: In terms of a life-long relationship, is there any point in asking, "Is she the one?" I know I just want the feeling of security of the answer. How better can I see into this?

GF: There is no point is such questions other than to produce a certain kind of fear-laced hope. Learn to "taste" the state that asks such questions and you will want better food!

lilcanuk: When you judge another, is it because of what you lack in yourself?

GF: We point out in others (in negative judgment) only those things we are ourselves.

Grayson: What exactly are the specific things that happen to a person who judges another and even bullies him or tries to humiliate or "put one over on him"?

GF: We are punished by the punishments we would give others.

Grayson: Is the desire for a better house or way of life simply the only manifestation the lower self can think of (albeit wrongly) to bring forward the same experience that only the Higher Self can know and give?

GF: There is nothing wrong with conscious preferences. It is only when preference becomes pain – because of identification with the desires – that it becomes a stumbling block to one's spiritual life.

GF: We are nearly out of time, but I want to give you my remaining notes on escaping the circle of self and walking away from the unconscious desires that drive it along.

To briefly review, we spoke of how we must learn to welcome life's disturbing moments -- as these same moments of "shake-up" are the secret catalyst for truth to help wake us up. And we learned how these unwanted times are crucial for true self-transformation, because they both reveal and make it possible to step out of the formerly unseen "circle of self."

When we left off we had reached this new understanding: In those unwanted moments where our life has been disturbed, we only know how to do one thing: turn to our own habitual thoughts and feelings and let them tell us what we need to no longer ache. Our pleasure is that this new desire replaces the old pain. Our displeasure is that this swap doesn't work! Now let's see why this holds true.

The only "self" that we know to turn to in moments of our distress is the very level of self responsible for that unwanted moment in our life! It's like asking a burglar what to do to keep him out of your house the next time you're away.

The problem is that this level of self is what it is because of how it knows itself -- meaning that the only reality this nature knows is the one it supplies itself by identifying with past thoughts and feelings it "sees" as being separate from itself. So, whenever life contradicts what this self "thinks" it knows is true, it sees life as trying to take away its happiness.

Each time this happens, the only recourse that our false self has is to reinvent itself, something it does by creating what it sees as a "new" desire to step in and replace the now thwarted one. This new desire lends the false self a sense of being new itself.

The secret drawback is that nothing our present self can desire can ever be new! All such longings are created from the reconfigured content of its own thought nature, and even one's most clever thoughts are still the stuff of the past. This discovery in itself should be enough to snap us out of running in these circles, but we have one more thing that needs to be seen:

Hidden in all of this mental running around is an unquestioned assumption that just because something in us resists life doesn't prove that it knows better than life what should be happening. Parts of us believe they know the best path to contented living even though, for all of their certainty, our conflict with life is unabated. Let's see what's "behind" this undetected deception.

In order to continue its pseudo-existence, the thought-self continually considers life around it using the content of its past experiences to gauge whether things have gone well or badly. And so it tells us how we should feel depending on its assessment of the moment, a conclusion based on a false assumption that it understands the true meaning of the moment it evaluates.

Unfortunately for this often-shocked sense of self, it doesn't know that the true nature of reality is nothing like it dreams it is; for as we now know it to be true, every moment of reality is new. This means that the essence of Now, the truly present moment, is unknown. This discovery sets the stage for recovering our True Self and its native freedom from painful desires.

It is our willingness to take part -- to be a part -- of this unknown moment that gradually awakens us to our own higher consciousness. It is our full awareness of the present moment that frees us from the fear of being disturbed by it, because in this higher self-awareness there exists no essential difference between ourselves and all that unfolds in the present moment.

Again, this pure present moment, the new "now," is absolutely unknown. Its secret nature is endless space, pure silence. It has no "individual" qualities because nothing exists outside of it to lend it any subjective attributes. And I stress these ideas here because of what it means to our study as follows:

The only so-called observable qualities any given moment may have are those given to it by a thought self that "names" that event according to its own conditioned nature. And it is from these self-assigned qualities that we then think (further) about what the moment means; so we find either satisfaction or disappointment in it, never knowing that we read our own labels.

But what we don't see is this: The nature in us that labels any moment in our life as being a "disturbance" is the same nature that created the conditions that caused this! Our inner task is to be aware of this truth, which empowers us to act consciously in any moment of disturbance brought about when our false self goes into conflict with life.

It is seeing our present nature in its action of avoiding some aching, continually creating the circle of self as it creates one new desire after another, that enables us to break its hold upon our lives. And as we awaken to this higher reality through awareness of ourselves, we also become aware of a new consciousness that can be described as this:

We realize that our True Self is the same as the present moment. And in the true present, in the Now, there can be no disappointment because of this great and wondrous spiritual fact: Life desires and fulfills Itself.

Let's summarize: We must see that desire is always an inadequate response to any moment wherein we find ourselves feeling disturbed by some action of life. When that disturbance comes (someone bothers you, a piece of bad news lands in your mailbox, etc.), realize that life is not asking you to fix it so that you can remain without having to change. Instead see this truth:

Life is asking you -- inviting you -- to take part in a whole new moment of relationship with it. Life is saying, "Let me show you the New and True You that already has its home in me."

So, instead of becoming lost in that instantaneous response of resistance, repulsion, and negativity, try to watch the whole moment rather than wanting to control it. Let go of your resistance and there goes with it whatever desire was about to dominate you again. Drop the names of your pains and you let go of all the reasons you have for them! Now you are free.

Our time has run out. Remember that the freedom you long for cannot be found by listening to the parts of you that want to run you through the same old changes. Dare to walk out of the circle of self and don't look back! Remember yourself, your wish for the Truth, and keep the love of the Light ahead of you at all times. God will see to your success.

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GF: Welcome to our chat tonight. These are difficult times, at best. So before we begin I want to give you some new ideas to work with that are vital for any of us who would do our part to ensure peace on earth.

There is one essential reason why there is war on this earth, and why this conflict continues as it has down through the ages. The answer may surprise you. We do not understand our own pain - our suffering. Six-and-a-half billion human beings live in ignorance of their pain. But this is not to say that we live pain-free.

In fact, without exception, human beings carry on their shoulders and in their hearts massive amounts of pain. No matter what religion you are, you have pain. No matter what part of the world you live in, no matter your economic condition, no matter your social conditioning, no matter the color of your skin - you have pain. All human beings have pain.

It is because we are presently not aware of most of it, and because we do not understand anything about the nature of it, that ignorance of our pain manifests itself in war. So, even though it isn't a popular topic of conversation among human beings, we must examine our pain if we are ever to gain the understanding to end war for good.

The interaction of all matter and energy in the Universe is governed by a grand set of Universal Laws. These laws can also be called Timeless Principles, Everlasting Forces, Fundamental Truths, and many other names. For our purposes, I'm going to call these forces Invisible Eternals.

As human beings, we are the embodiment of these Universal Forces. We are the embodiment of the principles that produced the universe that we live in. Until we understand something about these Principles that govern all and everything, we can't begin to understand ourselves, or our relationship with others.

One of these Invisible Eternals is the force of opposition. Everything created is born from opposition. Everything destroyed (incidentally, so that something new can be created), is done so by opposition. This is true inside of us just as it is true outside of us in the world and in the greater universe. Let's look at some commonly recognized examples:

Opposition is a major part of what modifies the movements of stellar bodies (in our galaxy, solar system, etc.). Collisions of tectonic plates create immense oppositional forces, which result in the formation of new land and the raising of mountain ranges.

There is opposition in the action of wind moving through a forest. The wind strengthens the healthy trees and cleanses the weak, making for a noble forest. Our immune system opposes the diseases that attack us. It does so not only to defeat the attacker, but also to learn about its tactics in preparation for the next battle.

Now, where there is opposition, there is always a form of conflict. In the physical world, this state of conflict is natural and accepted. After the winds pass, and the trees return to their normal state, the trees don't sit and hate the wind. Bacteria don't complain, "I hate the immune system because it wouldn't let me in."

But human beings are different. When we experience opposition and conflict, we resist it. We think about it. We hate the things that we are opposed to. Conflict inside of a human being creates pain.

What we fail to realize, however, is that without those opposing forces working their way in us, we could not change. We could not grow. It would be impossible. All things would stop because nothing would be created or destroyed.

So, we must ask: "What is it about this human nature that is different from the nature of the wind and the tree, that is different from the nature of the solar system, that is different from the nature of the tectonic plates? What is it inside of me that turns what is natural opposition into hate, anxiety, frustration, depression, and pain?"

When we look closely at ourselves, we see that all of these negative states find a home and their expression in us due to opposition to what "I want" in any given moment:

For example, one person wants all human beings to be Jewish or Muslim, while another insists they all be Christian or Buddhist. This group wants more money and that group stands in the way. You want me to love you and I am not acting very loving at the moment. I want to be left alone and you won't be quiet. So can we see the real root of conflict here?

I want what I see as necessary for my "peace" of mind, and when you don't want that same peace, in the same way, what happens to me? I get frustrated. And what follows frustration? Anger. And what follows anger? Violence. War. This is why before there can be peace on earth we must learn to see what makes us warring!

These wants -- these unconscious desires -- are the root cause of pain, and thus the root cause of war. We couldn't be frustrated, hateful, or angry because things didn't go our way unless we had a desire -- a picture in our mind -- of how they should go. So we rarely see the world around us as it is. We only see things in relation to how they fit in with our desires.

If we look at ourselves honestly, we can see that we don't actually meet people directly; we instead meet our evaluation of them. We don't actually have conversations with people; we talk to ourselves inside our mind about the conversation we're having while we're having it. We do not look out and see something as it is; we look out and describe to ourselves what we see.

When the world that we have imagined in our mind does not match the world of reality, we get frustrated. We feel pain. We get angry. We blame things outside of ourselves for the pain we feel inside. And we never see that it isn't the things outside of us that make us feel bad; it is the mechanism of desire inside of us that is the real cause of our pain.

Now, before we close out this first part of our study, you do the "math" given what we have discovered. No frustrated desire, no pain; no pain from frustration, no anger; no anger, no one to blame; no one to blame for my pain, no war.

Before we end the chat tonight I will finish these thoughts and offer some additional ideas on what each of us can do to give birth to a world without war.

Now let's get to your questions and comments, but please work to remember that our task here on-line together is to address what is real and what leads us to authentic self-transformation. Let's discuss the issues you are working upon within yourself, which means let's not spend our time with frivolous philosophical or religious questions. What would you like to talk about tonight? Let's see what we can learn together.

BillH: What is the distinction (if any) between observing conflict in the world and having a feeling that there shouldn't be the conflict. Or in other words what do you do if seeing some foolishness "bothers you"?

GF: In truth there is no difference between getting angry over the violence that one sees in the world and the violence within one that gets upset over what is seen. It's a good thing that you are seeing these more subtle aspects of your own psychology. Keep watching. The Truth will help you to understand these seeming contradictions in your own consciousness.

justme: I have this subtle, fearful, way-overprotective nature that seems to stop me from having real relationships. I am afraid to pay close attention and see the truths about people I love, and it saddens me. I sometimes wish to try to keep this horrible world from them despite my faith in God. What am I caught in here and what can I do to end the sad feelings I get when I see into somebody I love?

GF: First let me say that we must never allow any fear that we have about what we suspect to be the "truth" of someone to interfere without perception of the same. The Light by which we apprehend another's nature is in many ways the only true way in which we may safely know who is right for us and who is wrong for us. On another note, it is not your place (or anyone's for that matter) to shield someone else from this world and the lessons that it offers. When we try to protect people from what causes them pain, we effectively interfere with their realization that the world they encounter is but a reflection of their own nature. The only way we can really help one another really love one another is by encouraging each other to do the interior work it takes to discover the truth of ourselves.

justme: I have a once close family member who has been afflicted with a bad, common mental disorder. This person's life is torment at best. Our fears seem to be coming true in that this person's young children are growing and now taking on not-so-pleasant personalities. This affects all of us and it is the one thing I cannot understand although I try by letting go and being kind. Please advise.

GF: Naturally no one wants to see anyone that we care about fall into the hands of negative characteristics such as you have described. More than likely, it isn't that you cannot understand what is happening, but that there are parts of you that do not want to see the fact of what has transpired. Resisting life is futile, especially when it comes to refusing to see what others are making of themselves. This doesn't mean to be happy over the events, only to see the waste in wanting them to be different.

mobilman: Do you have understanding regarding this scripture: "Consider the lilies, how they grow; they neither toil nor spin; yet I tell you, even Solomon in all his glory was not arrayed like one of these."

GF: We often discuss in our ongoing meetings here at the Foundation the spiritual truth behind one of the Invisible Eternal principles I mentioned at the outset of the chat tonight. Walt Whitman once said that, "A blade of grass is made of the stuff of stars." How much more so is that true of us, and if that is indeed the truth (which it is), then we are not apart from the Grand Intelligence of this universe, nor its intent for Goodness to be ours everyday of our lives. This is how we are "arrayed."

Jilly: Does consciousness make a shift when you are aware of choosing against self?

GF: It could be said that consciousness is not unlike the reflection of a mirror, and that everything that passes into it and before it causes a change in the reflection, but not in the mirror itself. When we choose against ourselves, it is done in an unconscious act that reflects instantly in this mirror to reveal the conflict inherent in any divided act. This "shift," this "fluctuation," we can and must be conscious of through our awareness.

Jilly: I'm sorry; I must have stated my question wrong. What I meant was does consciousness make a shift when we choose in favor of God because of the knowledge we have gained through the work?

GF: Every act of will that is an expression of the Light that has entered us to make whatever choice is so indicated, changes our consciousness in that moment.

nrg-gate: On page 165 of "The Secret of Letting Go," there is this sentence: "The Truth itself promises that nothing bad will happen to you." Later, in same paragraph is the statement: "...the real danger lies not with the unexpected but with remaining where you are in your present life-level." Help me understand.

GF: There is no contradiction in these two ideas. Nothing bad occurs to the Good in any human being. This is because what is Good in us is created for the purpose of transforming all that it meets into an expression of Itself. The "danger" mentioned has to do with what happens to the soul that chooses the "good" that it prefers due to the pressure of the desire to fulfill itself according to one's conditioned need. Such a soul isolates itself and in so doing ultimately destroys its chance for Real Life.

Grayson: Does the following sound real or delusional? Sometimes, after going into the present and watching troubling thoughts, I see objectively my own and others' thoughts, and then feel freer. Sometimes, I go beyond this and receive insight to great things happening outside my immediate surroundings; I realize that somewhere children are having a blast at a park, or a young couple is walking near a lake, and I identify and suddenly feel more joy, peace, and freedom.

GF: Only you can know the difference between what is certainly possible as you've described it, versus the possibility that this is all taking place in imagination. The good news is, if you just keep watching yourself in the present moment, these issues will resolve themselves. Either way it turns out, don't let yourself identify with what may be a gift or an act of self-deception.

Grayson: I believe I could have worded my question better. I was not referring to definite, specific things happening outside my surroundings, but rather to the knowledge that no matter what is happening here, somewhere in this world people are enjoying themselves right now, and that is just as important to the world as my own situation is, and I seem to identify with that. Does this sound right?

GF: If you're asking me, "Is the nature of happiness, happiness wherever it may be expressed?" the answer is yes. We are each created with the potential to live in a world of intelligent principles instead of being captives of ignorance and the states it produces that punish us. Happiness exists as an objective entity, as surely does darkness.

Grayson: The real point I meant to ask about was whether it is "right" and truthful to feel joy and happiness because people somewhere in the world right now are experiencing that.

GF: If you are asking me to confirm that one might feel happiness while watching a child playing happily, the answer is yes. If you ask "can one feel the happiness of someone 500 miles away?" the answer is there is no difference between the happiness of "there" or "here." It is wrong parts of us that want to feel themselves special that separate such things in our mind.

Jilly: In a tape of yours I listened to recently you said something to the effect that awareness precedes a thought. Can a person stop certain thoughts/see them and not let them enter beforehand?

GF: The more one awakens to the activity of thought and its purpose in the mind, the more thought naturally quiets down, as it is no longer fueled by a form of unconscious self-fascination. Awareness always precedes thought, as surely as the sky must precede the bird that flies through it. Work to be more like the sky, and less like a "bird brain."

Eric: I just watched a Vernon Howard video and he said that I could easily, effortlessly drop all of my problems, worries, anxieties, burdens, false hopes (in other words, drop being "me"), etc., right now! Why do I refuse to do it?

GF: What Mr. Howard says is true. And in a deep but necessary spiritual paradox, you will only know the truth of this statement as you discover all that you can about the nature presently occupying you that cannot live in any other dimension other than the negative states you've described.

mobilman: I recently discovered that I have been identifying with money. I didn't realize it until an event where some was taken away (which I believed was unfair) and a storm overtook me. I realized that if money can make me happy, it can also make me unhappy. Comments?

GF: All desires are double-edged swords. The pleasure one gets from an image he is attached to is necessarily connected to a kind of dependency, which in turn breeds fear and anger when the conditions that supported that attachment collapse.

orion: I have had moments in observation where I was suddenly disturbed by an outer event and I could feel my heart jump -- a very unpleasant sensation. I am able to sit back from these disturbances and watch them, but then become upset that, after all my practice, something like a loud noise or an angry stare can cause such a physical reaction. Will the reaction ever go away?

GF: It is never the first reaction that is our problem. The physical organism is created to respond to physical stimuli of all orders. It is the second reaction that steals from us our peace and quiet of mind or heart. This is the reaction that either blames something outside of us for upsetting us, or that turns on us and belittles us for not being as spiritual as we had imagined. Study this in yourself.

James1: Is it true that I have become so consumed by fear that I don't want to do anything?

GF: Fear, unattended to in us, not only isolates us in an imagined fearful world, but serves to produce for us all of the evidence we need to confirm this delusional and dark conclusion.

James1: Do I address matters knowing that I am (what feels like) enveloped in this fear? Should I ask, "How has this fear manifested itself in and around me?"

GF: Yes. Don't think about what fear gives you to think about. That's how fear sucks you into its world. Instead of thinking, or being absorbed into feelings of fear, learn to watch these thoughts and feelings while they try to convince you that their life is your own. This watchfulness is a kind of light that will reveal to you the difference between the darkness that calls itself you, and the you that knows better.

mobilman: A decision I made recently appeared as though it was wrong. The second guesser came and began to tell me the reason this happened was because I did this and I should have done that. It worked out, but even if it hadn't, it didn't make the decision wrong. Comments?

GF: One must begin to realize that within one there is a certain nature that is only happy as long as something needs to be fixed. This same self cannot come to a decision and make it without flipping into conflict instantly over what was thought to be best. Here's a new action to take decisively: Choose what you must and then be done with the "second-guesser" in you who really only lives to steal life from you so that it may live.

Jilly: Can a bad relationship hinder spiritual development, even if you are working spiritually but the other person is not (whether it be a spouse or a child or other family member)?

GF: Nothing in the universe can hinder spiritual development in the soul who is willing to use all of one's conditions, regardless of their nature. This isn't to say that there is some benefit in dwelling with dark individuals, only that the light in us can use everything around it.

Carron: Someone who has been present through my life, someone who once thought the world of me, has now backed away, and by trying to make things better I've made it worse and the closeness is gone. I've tried to sit with the pain, and not react, but I see this person each day and try to find the "lesson" in the rejection I am feeling… but pain ends up finding it's way back.

GF: Where in the world did any of us get the idea that spiritual work is the antidote for pain in life? It is not the antidote, it is what allows us to work through the parts of us that produce this pain. Only when we are awake to the dynamic in us that produced a painful attachment will we have the capacity to naturally drop our interest in the sensations such attachments produce. Then we are free of pain because we've lost interest in what causes it in us in the first place.

orion: In social situations I move into an autopilot state, engaging in the same typical unconscious behaviors with the same people. No matter how much I remind myself to remain conscious, I have trouble being present and become aware of how unconscious I was as soon as I am alone. As such, I find it desirable to avoid others. What should I do?

GF: Always move toward the conditions that you want to avoid, not away from them. The parts of you that direct you to stay away from situations in which you find yourself asleep are the very sleeping parts that are compromising your wish to be awake. The only way to realize this and release yourself from these self-wrecking aspects is to bring them into the light of a conscious action to see them as they are.

saqib: Last year this time I came across the teachings of Vernon Howard. After some time I had an experience of being nobody. I just felt so in the moment. "I" the experiencer was not there, and it was so filled with awe I couldn't even speak about it. After a few weeks I was me with my conditioning again. Since then I have been quite unstable, confused and divided. My desires make my prayers and meditations look hypocritical. I have had enough from books and tapes. Please help.

GF: I understand what you have said. You may be assured of the following: Any awakening of a real nature has an actual organic effect on the brain. It takes time for the organism and the self that is the extension of it to orient itself to new orders of energy. Don't get caught in resisting your condition, imagining negative pictures about yourself that punish you, or otherwise identifying with parts of yourself trying to pull you down into fear or self-loathing. Go back to work on yourself. Drop all self-concern.

rousseau: I have felt the same disorientation occasionally when reading too much of Vernon Howard's or your books and tapes. I have to back off and just live, then come back to them a month or more later. I wondered if there was a reason for this. Actually I sometimes also tended to become "hard to deal with" during these times according to my family. I don't exactly know what changed in me that they noticed.

GF: Such cases are each individual and must be treated as such, which is one of the reasons why – in true cases – there is no substitute for being in the presence of the teacher helping to elicit such movements. As a rule the Light always feels "disorienting" to what is shadow-like, but this is not to say other (less flattering) factors may not be involved here.

saqib: Please clarify one thing for me: Going through these changes of adjusting to new levels of energy, do I enter a spiritual tradition of Sufism (for instance), or remain self-observant and to myself?

GF: Follow your intuition, but know that no "path" in and of itself has value; it is the person that makes the "tools" valuable, not the other way around.

saqib: Are you in any relationship at the moment with the spirit of Vernon Howard relative to the Sufi's teachings of a relationship or connection between living masters and students?

GF: The whole point of any true teacher or teaching is that the Spirit of Truth is timeless and not individual, so if one awakens, he or she realizes the same Spirit of Truth as apprehended by their teacher.

doctree: Is it foolish to leave an abusive relationship even if you have nowhere to go and might have to camp out for a while?

GF: It is never foolish to leave anyone or anything that abuses us in any way whatsoever, no matter where we might have to be for some time. Put what you know is true and right before what you fear and imagine in the night.

ScJ711: I keep having dark feelings inside whenever I think about the nature and motivation of evil or demons, especially since they exist on higher realms and are intelligent enough to understand that the universe has an eternal law of karma. Can you help me gain the proper perspective on this?

GF: No one can feel the nature of evil and remain in that relationship so as to be damaged by that unless they have been deceived into allowing their attention to remain on such darkness. Your awareness and your attention belong to you. Reclaim them and you will release yourself from these fears born out of being deceived.

Grayson: I think I see spiritual significance in the lighthearted quote, "You wouldn't worry about what people think of you if you ever realized how little they did." This Truth seems to kind of take the "self" out of situations. Does this sound right?

GF: Yes, that's exactly right. People rarely think of others without themselves being the center of those thoughts.

doctree: You once hinted to me that increasing my inner conflict would be good for me. I did not understand at all at the time and now only a little bit more. Can you explain what you meant?

GF: I didn't say you should increase your inner conflict, only that you should be willing to be more aware of just how much internal conflict already exists within you. Make your intention moment-to-moment to watch yourself as you are, instead of trying to prove yourself in whatever situations you find yourself in, and you will discover all the conflict you need to transcend it in yourself.

RobF: In the "Go Quiet" exercise in Design Your Destiny, when you tell us to watch and observe our thoughts, is that the same thing as when you tell us at other times to come awake and aware of our surroundings?

GF: Yes, they are one and the same.

Eric: I believe that self-deception may be a pretty important "area" of study. Please, what would you say is a particularly cunning and dangerous self-deception that we should be on the lookout for?

GF: Since a mind divided in itself cannot see itself, this same mind never recognizes that it sets out with one end in mind and four minutes later is working towards a completely different end. Before one can work on ending self-deception, one must first end the deception, the illusion, that he is "one" to begin with. Only discovering how divided we are can end the deception that is born in the dark of this division.

Diojeneez: Awhile ago I encountered something that completely baffled me. It was Swedenborg's interpretation of Genesis, which looked (at least to me) exactly like everything thing I've heard you teach! Maurice Nicoll and Vernon Howard have done things like this as well. How is it that your whole teaching is contained in the first book of the Bible, but more than that, how is it that you even perceive the esoteric meaning of the Bible to begin with?

GF: It is difficult for us to understand that it is not men or women who are teachers of Truth, but it is the Truth that teaches itself through such individuals. This being said, there is no individual who finds Truth, but that the Truth you have described expresses itself through various individuals throughout time.

justme: Do you know why we gain different insights at different times despite being in the same situation or hearing the same teachings? I believe I am paying attention, but seem to hear new ideas from something I've heard dozens of times before. Does this mean I am not being fully awake? Could I be doing something better?

GF: Yes, what you have described is one of the reasons why it is so important for an individual to do "continuous" inner work, and to keep the company of others who do that same kind of work. The reason for this is that we are not "one" within ourselves, but "many," and each of these aspects of ourselves have, in essence, separate "ears" that hear the Truth differently at different times. The Truth eventually unites these aspects into what is whole.

ScJ711: As I continue to understand this false nature in me that creates feelings of guilt, fear, and judgment, I find myself coming across many spiritual teachings that talk about entities attaching to our souls at some point in our evolution that could be a product of the false self. This has produced a lot of fear in me, but I know I'm ultimately in control of my soul. I would really appreciate if you could help me gain the right perspective on this.

GF: You might want to get a copy of "Secrets of Cleansing Your Heart Mind, and Soul" from our website. What you have said is true. There are subtle forms that attach themselves to us as surely as thoughts are forms that we become attached to ourselves. Fear of such possibilities only helps to ensure the possibility feared. Drop this concern and choose self-study over self-fascination.

pkay8: I'm having some trouble with meditation and "going within." I've been reading your book The Lost Secrets of Prayer. It's really good and reader-friendly; I just cannot get myself to let go. Do you have any words that might make it click?

GF: This is hard to understand at first, but think on what I say here until you understand it. Don't "try" to make your mind quiet. Real meditation is about living in the awareness of what one actually is at the moment. It is this awareness that is the true nature of silence, and only as we live in relationship with it - through meditation - do we begin to experience the presence of its nature. Then silence is not a creation of ours, but a condition we awaken to within ourselves.

Diojeneez: Vernon Howard had this booklet about human sharks in which he says that "people want to be the stars of their little sick shows entitled, 'How Important I Must Be That The Whole World Is Out To Get Me!'" My question for you is, why exactly does the false self want to be important, and how does that desire function within me?

GF: One of the unseen deceptions that secretly drives human beings crazy is that, on one hand, their false nature is literally compelled to think about itself and put itself before all else, and on the other hand, nothing this nature can do (since it is false itself) can make itself feel real. In the long run, this nature just loves to vibrate with no concern for what shakes it up.

briant: Although not a promiscuous person, I have always "looked" at other women and never seemed to be free from the desires of X-rated material and the darker sides of things. For the first time in my life, I recently felt free from all of that and was no way interested in any other curiosity -- just my fiancée. How can I keep that real life feeling? I do not want to be caught up in false, meaningless attractions.

GF: There is no sickness in any of us that does not make us feel sick when it is active. Awareness of ourselves reveals the fact of this whereas the desire of such things masks both the sickness and the pain it produces. Work to remain awake and aware of yourself, and don't hesitate to ask God as you understand Him to give you more of the light you need to be free.

Jason: Is it possible to remember and honor one's memory without this false self? I am trying to honor the memory of a past loved one but when I try to remember them in a proper manner, most of my thoughts are about me.

GF: We spoke about this in our class last night. What is Real, True, Good, and Right in us -- relative to ourselves and our loved ones -- is not an act of memory in any way. Love is timeless… as is compassion, respect, and all other noble qualities. When we live our lives working to reflect these Higher realities, we are automatically in relationship with every possible counterpart that has had a presence in our lives.

2big: Someone I know is incredibly negative. Everything is wrong, bad, someone else's fault, etc. I am using this to see more deeply into how I myself do the same thing, just to a lesser degree. Do you have words of wisdom to help me and my friend see more clearly how to use so-called bad things to move to a higher life? Is it just expectations about a certain outcome that get us in trouble? Or is there more to it?

GF: One of the most powerful and ultimately self-transforming principles that we can and must awaken to in our lives is that nothing and no one that we see in life, and certainly no experience that we derive from that relationship, actually exists outside of our own consciousness. What this means is that negative people set off negativity latent in us that we then blame them for. This is why if we learn to love our enemies, we can begin to use them and their darkness for the purposes that the Light within us has allowed this relationship to exist in the first place.

Eric: Tolstoy said that these Principles are simple, understandable, and few in number. As we truly work more and more on ourselves (not just in imagination), do we begin to see connections between things that before seemed completely unrelated? I think maybe I have experienced this seeing connections, and I'll tell you, it's actually a fun experience.

GF: Yes, precisely, and the reason this is "fun" is because when one sees that he or she is a part of the perfection of the Divine, there is no more fear that one has to run the show in order to star in it.

Diojeneez: What is this idea of charity Jesus always talked about? According to the Muslims he says, "Charity does not mean doing good to him who does good to you, for this is to return good for good. Charity means that you should do good to him who does you harm." I'm very confused, I thought we shouldn't even keep the company of those who love the darkness?

GF: Do not hate those who hate you, but bear (consciously) the negative reactions that appear within you that seek to punish them for their transgression. This is laying down your "life" for the sake of your brother.

ScJ711: In order to be free, we have to understand our dark side, and as long as we stay without understanding, we will be in fear. So I understand that evil on the earth's plane of existence is born out of deep fears and deep pains at the core of someone's being. So forgive them because they're in pain and are not aware of the karma they produce. But what about the forces that work against us on higher realms? Every time I let this go I have an emotional response. How do I understand and proceed?

GF: Your task is to remember the Light and put it first in your life (as best you understand this), and to let this living Light "fight" the "battles" that it will. Be an observer on the field of consciousness, not a "general" in the midst of trying to win some war you cannot.

Diojeneez: What is this Law of Opposites you and Vernon Howard are always talking about? I only understand it in bits and pieces. Can you define it?

GF: Any attempt to describe it under these limited conditions serves nothing. You might pick up a copy of The Intimate Enemy which discusses some of the dynamics you wish to learn.

2big: I used to like most all music and listened to a lot of radio. Now I find most music and the radio irritating and prefer silence or very quiet background music. Is this good? Did your taste in music change as you sought the higher life?

GF: Clearly this is natural as one's nature seeks what best reflects itself wherever one may be.

briant: I never try to sit and meditate but almost always stay in an observant state throughout the day. Should I try to sit and practice, or go with what I am doing to gain more understanding to life?

GF: There is benefit in sitting quietly, free from exterior distractions and intending to meet life without sensations such as life elicits from our normally engaged mind.

steveb: Would you recommend some music for meditation?

GF: As a prelude, perhaps. But for the true purposes of meditation – which is communion – music becomes a hindrance, not a help.

Carron: Any suggestions on how to release our thoughts of attachment?

GF: Such letting go begins with realizing that these thoughts you have described are not "your" own to begin with.

DebbiE: You have said on numerous occasions (yourself or through others) that I have all the answers within. I seem to not have as much need to ask questions. I think I must be getting somewhere with the work.

GF: So be it.

Grayson: I don't seem to fully understand scales and levels. Can you elaborate? If not here, can you give me a good source on those topics?

GF: You can find some help in seeing into these principles if you listen to either volume one or two of the "Secret Teachings of the Sacred Testaments."

Grayson: These multiple selves in us you have been mentioning tonight, are they the different "I's" that conditionally pop up in different situations that make up the lower self of thoughts?

GF: What you have stated here is essentially true, although these various lower aspects of "self" are not limited to one's thoughts.

Grayson: Should the lower self of "I's" be considered something to ultimately kick out for good, or is it naturally beneficial to a full life if understood and used in the right way?

GF: There is no "you" that can kick anything out of you anymore than an auto can kick a bad gear out of its own transmission.

GF: Our time together on-line has nearly run its course, so now I wish to give you my remaining notes on what each of us can do if we wish to give birth to a world without war. I will spend a brief moment summarizing a few of the more important ideas we discussed at the outset of the chat. They are important enough to review once more before we continue our investigation into the secret causes and potential "cure" for this conflicted planet of ours:

There is a set of grand universal laws that govern the interaction of all matter and energy in the universe (including human life). One of these Invisible Eternals is the beautiful principle of natural opposition. Natural opposition is the force responsible for all birth and change in the universe.

Natural opposition in itself is a constructive force, however, we, as human beings, transform it into a destructive, negative energy by comparing in our mind "what is" to "what should be."

This comparison of our image of the way we think things should be to the way they really are, causes frustration and pain. We then are moved to look for something outside of ourselves to blame for the pain we feel inside, so we fight and there is war. Must this pattern persist? How does all this relate to stopping war?

This war with Iraq is the manifestation of an immense pressure between opposing forces. Everyone involved has objectified its/his/her pain. The US has objectified its enemy. Saddam has objectified his enemy. Every dictator in the world, and his willing or unwilling countrymen, have in some form or another given a name to what they see as causing their pain.

When this latest war ends, the "victors" will have a momentary reprieve. They will enjoy victory just long enough to conceive the next desire that will bring along with it the next thing to blame for it not being fulfilled. The "losers" will not get a reprieve, but will instead harbor even greater hatred for the ones who "caused" them pain. Another war will follow.

This is why the time between two wars is not peace. All throughout time, war continues to manifest because its seeds are never destroyed. And this is where we come in. This is what every True teaching has been trying to disseminate since the beginning of time. If we want the war to end, we must let it end in us.

We must bring the opposing forces into our awareness. We must see them as they are -- not as we are. Instead of naming and defining what the cause of our pain is -- so that we can have a new desire, a new enemy, a new plan -- we must learn about the mechanism inside of us that creates pain.

We are created to understand that we are the embodiment of all of the Invisible Eternal Principles, and that they have their place and their power within us, but these opposing forces were never intended to be used by our minds to create negativity, hatred, fear, and pain.

Just like the wind in the trees, these opposing forces are meant to exist merely as a potentiality that is expressed, and, at the end of the expression, all the conflict is meant to be gone.

You and I have something in us that is capable of transcending these forces. In that moment of anger, that moment of fear, that moment of anxiety -- that moment in which we feel thwarted and frustrated -- rather than turning our lives over to a mental construct (that instantaneously creates desire and pain), the whole thing can be let go -- consciously forgotten.

In those moments where we feel negativity swelling inside of us, we can become aware of ourselves and the mechanism inside of us that creates pain and war. We can realize that every desire, every wish for things to be different than they are, is a secret dictator on another campaign to run our lives into the ground. Which brings us to this:

How do we answer a dictator, any dictator, wherever he, she or "it" appears in the world around us or within us? We take away his power by taking away its "source": his money. This strips him of his supporters, which leaves him with no forces to implement his evil. How does all this happen? We implement a policy of radical isolation.

What is radical isolation? It is just what it sounds like: No trade. No interaction. No deals. None.

Why? Because "trade" is how the tyrants of this world get their money. And this money is what keeps the generals in place and the army deployed. The generals and the army keep the psychos in power. And there you have tyranny and oppression. (Please remember that this is an interior story for our spiritual development and not a suggested political action.)

Try to look at the big picture here. The world has tried polite sanctions for many years, but they are not meaningful. Sanctions in the eyes of the world mean "I'm not going to trade with you on this thing. But I am going to go ahead and trade with you on the other, because if I don't, my people might have to suffer, which means I won't stay in power."

The collective will of the world today is non-existent. It cannot enact real sanctions. Can you imagine President Bush getting on television and saying, "Ladies and gentlemen, I really mean this. I realize now that war doesn't work. Hatred and violence begets more hatred and violence. So what we're going to do instead of dropping bombs is enact a total embargo of Iraq. This means that as a world, not one country will trade with the oil rich state of Saddam. Now, among other unpleasant things, this will mean gas rationing. But, we're through with this dictator. We're going to isolate the evil so that the goodness that is inherent in that country, in its oppressed peoples, can have a chance to be strengthened and grow free."

Do you think this scenario impossible? Life teaches otherwise. What happened to any drug addict or alcoholic who finally kicked his or her damaging habit? It has to be that there was something inherently good in that body which was strengthened to the point where it could understand the destruction that was taking place. Once the understanding was there -- once the person could see the whole of the situation -- that person could never go back and touch what they were involved in any more than they could stick their hand into a fire.

What does radical isolation mean for us personally? We know that anger is bad for us, self-pity is destructive, anxiety and stress rip us apart. But what do we do with these negative states? We make trade deals!

Why? Because as individuals we do not have a collective will. We have "generals" and "cabinet members and diplomats" inside of us -- some of which say no, others of which say they need the trade. "I need to feel sorry for myself, because this time it's really important," "I need to be angry at that person; just look at what he did to me!"

We never say, "Anger, I know you are a destroyer of happiness. I will not trade with you. Fear, you have fooled me once too often. Self-pity, you have punished me for the last time!" We don't practice radical isolation. We practice appeasement instead.

There was once an international policy of appeasement whose high point came in 1938 with the Munich Pact made between Britain, France, and Nazi Germany. Basically it said: "Hitler's OK. Let's make a deal with him and give him what he wants; he promises he won't bother us if we do this." The next thing you know the world is at war. So how does this lesson apply to us?

No matter how much we want to feel bad over that breakup, no matter how much we want to blast that person who didn't treat us right, no matter how much we want to get angry over whatever -- we must not let those negative energies express themselves through us. Instead we must work to isolate them in our awareness of them.

This action leaves them alone in the Light -- and robbed of the powers they need to make deals in the dark (of us). This is a difficult task to undertake because there are parts of us that secretly enjoy much of this pain. We feel consoled in our self-pity. We feel self-important when we are angry. We absolve ourselves from responsibility when we blame others.

But if we hope for a real end to conflict, then this inner work of radical isolation is the cost. When we will do our part to weaken the negative parts in us, it serves to strengthen the good because another Invisible Eternal is that health, balance, and goodness are intended to prevail. Light always triumphs over darkness, Good over evil, Peace over war.

Each of us must do the work to end war inside of us. This higher spiritual action alone is the pathway to the kind of Real Peace that no dictator, physical or psychological, can ever take away from us because the conditions of our awakening consciousness won't permit it.

Our time has run out. Remember all that we have discussed this evening. Choose the true inner path of peace by refusing to be a part of the conflict that calls you to enlist in the war within you. Choose in favor of the Light, and it will fight the good fight for you. Do persist with your inner work. And now, good night.

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GF: Welcome everyone. Before we begin our chat tonight, let me introduce you to some helpful ideas about what is required of us if we wish to realize our True nature.

First it should be explained that real self-transformation has little to do with trying to somehow change the form of our present nature by struggling to become more of "this" or less of "that." Real self-transformation and the realization of it are one and the same. This is what we will discuss, in part, at the outset of our chat, and again before we say good night.

Seen or not, everyone everywhere is looking for his or her "heaven." Watch people closely and this search becomes terribly evident. The man seated at his desk dreaming of when he will have his life to himself, the woman at the luncheon counter trying to resolve some relationship issue in her mind… from the more than obvious to the totally unexpected, one thing is clear:

All of us, moment to moment, are looking for a little peace, a little happiness of our own. Some of us seek this heaven in worldly things, within plans for a better tomorrow filled with new pleasures. For others, bliss is someone to hold, or being held rapt by some natural wonder. And some are sure that their conditioned idea of heaven is the same as living in its grace.

But, regardless of where in this world one seeks his or her heaven, two things ought to be clear: first, these heavens of ours never last. They lose their luster. Reasons always abound, but in one way or another, reality collides with our dreamboat; and as it sinks into life's unknown and unwanted waters, goes with it our hope that "this time" we had made it!

Second, it isn't until we have had enough of coming up "empty" that it occurs to us that not only have we been looking for heaven in all the wrong places, but maybe, just maybe, what our heart longs for isn't to be found where we have been searching for it. The ancients teach, "Why seek ye the permanent in the passing, the eternal in the temporary?" This is our study tonight.

I live on top of a small mountain in southern Oregon where each morning, from a chair seated next to a large window in my small house, I sit quietly and watch the world turn. Right outside, usually less than ten to twelve feet away from where I am seated, it is as though Mother Nature mounts a wildlife parade just for me.

Deer, wild turkey, gray tree squirrels, rabbits, and more than a dozen species of birds all congregate and then move through an area just beneath a cluster of spreading oak trees. The birds come for the seed I provide in a number of stations, and the turkeys come for their table scraps. Why the rest appear as they do is anyone's guess. Maybe they just enjoy the party!

At any rate, come early March, signs of spring appear and this change means many things to my visiting friends. For most birds, mating season begins in earnest. This usually means lots of singing, posturing, and aggressive, territorial behavior, while for some of the other creatures, this time heralds a season for giving birth to young conceived some months before.

But regardless of these varying conditions, one thing remains in common to one and all; and it is apparent to anyone watching with an eye willing to observe and learn: these creatures are constantly active. They are as alert and as sensitive to life going on around them as is a silk spider web responsive to the slightest summer's breeze.

And along with this natural feature of all wild creatures, in fact very much at the root of what enables them to expend so much vital energy, is another highly noticeable behavior: their lives are a never-ending search for food. Apart from propagating their own species, feeding themselves is their principle work on this earth. Which brings us to the point of these first notes.

The silent turning of the seasons, the latent desire of all creatures to fulfill the purpose for their being, the invisible hand that ensures that necessary supplies of food stuffs will be there for them at the right moment; these elements, their balance and concert with one another all speak of what the Wise have called (and still do) the "Invisible Eternals."

These Invisible Eternals are the unseen Timeless Principles that sit behind the expression of our physical world, and that are to its existence as is the sun to the shadows that pay silent witness to their creator. To be able to see these Eternal Forces as the true backdrop of a greater reality is to become a witness to an Intelligent Universe at work.

For the one who would become consciously aware of these Invisible Eternals, the same is brought into a whole new order of reality where intelligence, action and harmony are as one thing; herein the Light shines upon and animates all creatures alike. Even conflict serves something greater than its lesser causes.

This journey of awareness between one's first glimpse of this Higher Reality, and one's realization of it as the ground of one's own being, is the true spiritual path and task of those who would know and be known by Truth. And we are created to enter this Higher World, to know this heaven and its Love while we dwell on earth. Make no mistake about this.

All Scripture, the Wisdom teachings regardless of origin, confer this same truth. To take one example, the great Christian mystic Boehme points out that Christ taught, "My sheep hear my voice, and I know them, and they follow me, and I give them the eternal life." Here Christ did not say, "You may know life eternal in a time to come (i.e., after death),” but now, in this life.

If anyone has "eyes to see" these Invisible Eternals -- where the celestial is hidden in the common -- and "ears to hear" the truths about themselves and their relationship to these everlasting Principles, then such a person is ready to begin the inner work required for the next step to make this change in their being. Yes, it takes work; and any who teach otherwise mislead.

What is the nature of this inner work that we must do, and how can we be sure it is required of us? When is this work to be done, and who or what determines all of the above? These are the questions that seekers have been asking since time began. For now, one thing ought to be clear, and the rest of it we will touch on before the chat's close:

To enter the Everlasting World where the Light of Conscience is awake within Itself requires first that we learn to align ourselves with the Eternal Principles that are its secret foundation. And then, as our faith grows in the Goodness of this Higher Ground, that we surrender ourselves, our will, to the Truth of its Eternal Being.

Just before the end of tonight's chat I will enlarge these last thoughts and offer you some new ideas about specific ways in which we can do the work to align ourselves with, and realize, what is our own True Nature.

What would you like to talk about tonight? Have you been working on some special condition within yourself and wish some clarification? Let's get started with your questions and see what happens. Please do keep your questions and comments to real issues. Speculative thinking and other philosophical meanderings are meaningless if self-realization is one's sincere desire.

All right then, you are on. What do you want to discuss? What's on your mind? Let's get started!

rrogoff: Do you have a recommendation for how to stop temptation (like with smoking)? I need some advice about freedom from voices. I would like to know if I am at all on the right track.

GF: There is an important principle at the root of all True spiritual teachings, and it applies to your question. The principle is that "resistance to the disturbance is the disturbance." What this means is that when we struggle to stop ourselves from doing something against ourselves merely out of the wish not to suffer what we do to ourselves, we may be assured the behavior will continue. We can't end our wrong relationship with the parts of ourselves that tempt us and then torment us for falling into their hands until what we are tempted to do no longer holds any attraction for us. This approach is not trying to dominate what is defeating us, but is based on the idea of illuminating what has been deceiving us. Until we recognize the difference, we will struggle for no true gain because we do not understand that what we are against within us is a secret part of us.

rrogoff: Am I in a dangerous position to just not worry about it? Will I further harm myself? Knowing that I have surrendered to these voices, what is the key to dismissing them? I study and study and they seem to have free reign. Is there a way I can tell if I'm on the right track? Is this a lifetime of study I am facing to get rid of these hostile voices?

GF: Clearly I can't diagnose your condition online. But I will tell you two things. First, you have the God-given right not to be negative. You have been created with what has authority over any harmful voices. Your task is to decide what you want for relationships in this life. Then having decided, you must not only choose, but work to align yourself with the Light that can and does defeat what is defeating you. Go into our online book store and order tape T234 "Seal the Gates of Hell." I believe it will help.

ADB: I'm having a hard time differentiating when I turn the awareness of a dark feeling in me into an identification with that feeling and that dark nature. Can you help me tell when I've become identified and not just aware? It all seems so subtle, too subtle to detect accurately.

GF: Try to recognize the difference between being aware of a negative state versus being absorbed in it. In awareness of a negative state there is always a kind of conscious discomfort born in the awareness of being "apart from" the state. When we are absorbed in a state (i.e., identified with it) there is just the dull anxiety or pain without any consciousness of ourselves having been compromised by that state.

ADB: So when I can say to myself, at a particular moment when I'm aware of "heaviness" inside, that I am aware that I've been overtaken by depression, then I can be assured that I'm not identified (at least for that moment) with the depression? Am I interpreting your answer correctly?

GF: Self-observation is not what we do in order to end a condition. Trying to end any condition in us in our consciousness ensures that condition stays in place. Self-observation, awareness of a state, brings that state in us into a certain order of intelligence that knows exactly what "to do" with that state. Our task is to embrace the Light, not to create it.

rrogoff: What does it mean to be identified?

GF: To be identified means that one’s sense of self is vested in his thought about something, like when we get a new car and then we feel pain when it gets a scratch.

hawkeye: Is there a way to help someone deal with the pressure they feel in stressful situations, like test taking?

GF: If you can help this person to learn the difference between doing what is in their power versus struggling against what is not, then you may help. In this instance, all stress is counterproductive to the condition it meets. It is a mechanical reaction that produces the opposite of what it seems to bring. For instance, it feels like stress protects us. It doesn't. It punishes us even as it steals our ability to think and to respond intelligently.

nobush: Should one drop all search for self-improvement and just live in a state of 80% "no mind"? I'm about through using my ego to figure life out. Is this good? I mean, I don't "get" life or my purpose here… what I'm supposed to do with it. Life seems cold and isolating to me, and it always has.

GF: The question you've asked is born out of frustration. Frustration always defeats the individual whom it occupies. A state of being awake is not the same as walking around with a blank mind. It is into minds that have been dulled with frustration or fear that negative states find a way to prove to a person that life has no point. Start over. Just work to be as awake as you can, and then let life reveal to you causes for you in it that you have yet to imagine.

nobush: I'm going to ask you the same question in a different way because I have touched the power of it but don't "get" it yet. Is the idea of the spiritual path to just drop one's thinking? This allows one's soul to give one guidance. It speaks when you're silent. It's silent when you think. If this is so, how does one know when one is receiving the soul's guidance?

GF: To be inwardly silent allows us to become conscious of a whole new order of ourselves, one that doesn’t “allow” self-compromise of the presence of other punishing self-divided states. No one “guides” himself to sorrow.

Rael: I have been troubled about the upcoming war, the battle of Armageddon that we are about to start. I see the folly of starting such a conflict, but see that protesting it is equal folly. What can we do in such a situation?

GF: You're in the right place to understand the following instruction: The war in this world is a reflection of the unseen war in each of us. Before there can be peace on earth, each of us must understand this spiritual truth. With this in mind, find all of the different ways you can in your day to let the conflict or violence end with you. An example: Someone says something cruel – don't fire back a "missile." Bear the darkness in you and it ceases to affect the world outside of you. It is changed, you are changed, the world changes.

801: Regarding self-observation: I find myself making thought comments such as "What is this feeling?" or "I don't know," or simply fear, bitterness, etc.... is there a way to shut out all commentary? I think I'm doing it wrong.

GF: You must not try to shut out thoughts and feelings. What's disturbing you is more your resistance to the internal chattering than the chattering itself. Learn to watch these parts of you the same way you would watch a flock of seagulls swooping down on a beach. Their squawking has nothing to do with you.

Truition: Conscious risk clearly brings the struggle between our thought-self and our true self into plain view. What guidance can you provide for taking useful risks?

GF: Never allow a psychological fear that appears in your mind to go unchallenged. Learn what it means to meet what frightens you with the intention not of overcoming the condition the fear points to, but with seeing into the nature that produced the fear to begin with. This is most helpful if you can do it.

RAY: Can you explain how we get the things that we don't want based on thoughts?

GF: Many times, certain fearful thoughts will tell us that if we do what they instruct, we will be protected. As we follow the guidance of these thoughts, we are resisting whatever it is in life that produced the condition that gave rise to these thoughts. The more we resist any condition, the more likely it is that condition will persist. Try to see how this works. Ever hear the expression, "Don't think about that 'Pink elephant'"?

Eric: Is the following statement a proper thing to say to God at a moment in which I have truly observed anything whatsoever in myself? "Please teach me how to NOT do anything about what I just observed." Is there something better to say? Now I seem to "monkey around" with what I observe in myself, which keeps me going in circles.

GF: If you open a door into a room that has been dark for a hundred years, the light that floods in effortlessly dismisses all of the shadows that filled the room before. When we see things in ourselves, we do not have to comment to ourselves or to God about what has been seen. The light of self-awareness does for us all that is necessary.

nate100: I have developed the introspective relationship with myself that is necessary to identify my flaws and work out insecurities, but sometimes I am confused about what negative feelings are caused by emotional baggage from the past, and what negative emotions are accurate for the specific situation.

GF: I can answer this easily. All negative emotions that one identifies with are destructive. There is no difference between emotional baggage and an emotional state that punishes us. Try to recognize (which is what real self-awareness allows us to do) that the presence of negative energy in us - unattended by the light of awareness - is always constrictive and self-compromising.

Grayson: I have goals as a writer. Previously, I have put myself into the future I wanted to create, but know this is wrong. Should I just focus on the present love I have for the building of the story and take it moment to moment, or are future goals good to an extent?

GF: Apart from practical applications relative to knowing it takes 30 minutes to get from one end of town to another, goals as you have described them are inherently self-limiting, and ultimately self-lashing. Stay with your love of your craft. Love will not only perfect what you do, but it will bring you into its act.

RAY: How do we align our thoughts in the outer world so our true nature doesn't bring the opposite of our outer world thoughts?

GF: Just as no wave exists without having been born by invisible currents in an ocean, so is it true when it comes to thoughts. They are an expression of subtler forces, deeper energies. It is our awareness of this deeper aspect of ourselves that is an inlet, a window into the true nature of the thoughts that both occupy us and that we project out into the outer world. Make your aim to be awake to, aware of the kinds of thoughts and feelings you have, and that same awareness will handle the rest for you.

Grayson: Are the individual "I's" of the lower self made up of clusters of thoughts and emotions?

GF: No individual "I" exists apart from some relationship with an opposite. Most of what we take for being "I" is born out of some form of resistance. These "I's" have associations, and these can be said to exist in various clusters according to type.

stevie: Are all positive feelings that we experience in our unawakened state false, like our negative feelings?

GF: No, you must understand that when we speak of negative feelings being false, it isn't that they aren't real, but rather that the sense of self that they produce through their presence is a false "I." It is temporary, a condition born out of a relationship with a passing emotional condition. Positive feelings are also real. But again, they are an aspect of our temporal life that produce only fleeting sensations of well-being. I hope this helps.

suzannemly: I struggle with living in the same surroundings and being with the same people as I work on being in touch with my true nature. I often feel a strong desire to move away from my family and responsibilities. I feel I should be able to live in both worlds, if you will - the outside one I'm used to and the inside one I aspire to spend most of my time in. Do you have any suggestions for transcending this duality? Do I just ride it out, or is it my higher nature telling me that I need to physically move on?

GF: It may be that one needs to make a move with regards to their environment, but I can tell you that there should be no necessary contradiction between one's exterior world and their wish for an interior life. The real Work on this earth has always been about learning to use the world around us as a mirror to transform the world within us.

Grayson: From your books, I have the idea that when one full "I" is in charge, its opposite is there also, like when one works toward a goal, the opposite fear of loss will be there, too. Is this right?

GF: Essentially that is correct.

Eric: It seems like as I go through my day I sometimes catch myself being my usual self, whether it be the way I walk or my facial expressions or whatever. I have this serious nagging thought (feeling?) after I observe my usual self that I will never be able to stop being me, like I will be chained to the old me forever. What do I do? Do I observe this nagging thought and just continue observing with patience and persistence?

GF: You must understand that your false self has no interest in you freeing yourself from its influences over your life. Of course it tells you that you will never succeed. Next time you hear this, ask yourself this question: Is it the light or the darkness that tells me I'll never be free of the dark I'm in? When you know this answer, you know what to do with your own negative reactions.

trusting_soul: I am wondering why it is that every time I try to understand and open myself to what you are saying, all I find is that your answers leave me feeling as though you want me to have inner turmoil. Why question things inside that have no real answers? Why mess with things that aren't broken?

GF: Thinking that my answers are intended to lead you to inner turmoil misses the mark entirely. I cannot give you what you already have. Our present condition interiorly is constant turmoil that we are by and large unconscious to 99% of the time. It is the gradual awareness of these conflicted parts of us that brings an end to them. Conflict cannot end conflict. This is what we must discover if we wish to be free. It begins with self-awakening.

Grayson: Would it be right to say that emotions are "echoes" of thoughts, so that if I have a negative emotion, if I can do the work to try to find the thought, I eventually will?

GF: No, emotions are not echoes of thoughts, they are a completely different creature in terms of their order of being. However, negative emotions do support negative thought. Be awake to the thoughts and feelings and your awakedness will do for you what thought cannot.

Roy: In this remarkable work coming through you, I see a repeating theme --to increase our consciousness by self-observation and not identifying. To me, nothing else is attainable without this condition. When I get comfortable with something I suspect it has become mechanical, so it is with my self-observation. Can you help me to discriminate real self-observation from just thinking I'm observing myself?

GF: True self-observation always includes the awareness of the thinker and the one who thinks he's watching. If you are not aware of your thoughts, then you are your thoughts. There will always be in true self-observation a sense of inclusion of all things observed, as opposed to the common sense of ourselves which is always due to something exclusionary.

jaybird: Can you briefly state an effective way to use feelings of discouragement for spiritual growth?

GF: You may have this backwards. We don't use clouds to realize the sun. When the clouds are gone, the sun is there. Discouragement is a lying, negative state that drags us into it because we get something out of the relationship. When we end our relationship with what is false, lo and behold the True appears. That's growth.

Judy: As much as I try to do this work, I still catch myself occasionally either making a critical remark about someone or feeling a pang of envy about what someone has, etc. I am aware immediately that I'm doing it and try to drop it, but I get upset with myself that I get these feelings. Why in the world do I care what other people do or have anyway? Any suggestions to overcome this?

GF: Learn to watch the second reaction. What's the second reaction? It is a negative response in us to having seen a negative response in us. This is a trick of the false nature to keep itself in charge of our faculties. Drop the second reaction. Do this and gradually the initial reaction will begin to fade away because of your willingness to work through it.

stevie: How important is meditation to our inner work? It is not something I practice. Should I be?

GF: There is no substitute for watching one's mind quietly, attentively. Meditation, spending time by yourself watching yourself, is not only a good practice to do at whatever time is available to set aside for it, but in the long run, meditation is life. We are created to participate in the interior world of ourselves. Meditation is both the window into that world, as well as the way in which we participate therein.

Grayson: When I come into the Present, I see not only my own thoughts and emotions, but others' and how people are affected by them. It seems then that my lower self is very insignificant, and I seem to see others more objectively and clearly. This brings a sense of freedom. Does this sound right?

GF: Yes, this is quite accurate what you have said. When we can be awake to our own inner life, that awareness helps us to be aware of the inner life of all others. This is the real beginning of True compassion.

Eric: I feel like I'm losing my sense of humor, maybe because my humor was or is based mostly in vulgar subject matter or making fun of somebody else. Nowadays that kind of humor doesn't sit right. Does this sort of thing happen often in the Work?

GF: Yes, it does. The real changes that take place in us almost always occur before we become conscious of those changes. In this instance, you are beginning to awaken to how distasteful darkness is. Keep going.

LMAC: The last several years I've noticed that I am more emotional than when I was young. I'll cry with warm fuzzy thoughts, reading greeting cards, people telling me their triumphs and great misfortunes (like deaths in their family, etc.). Something tells me this emotional feeling isn't quite right to be expressing it to this extent. I feel embarrassed if anyone sees tears welling up in my eyes while they are talking to me. Can you shed some light on this for me?

GF: Your intuition is correct. And there are any number of interior reasons for excessive sentimentality such as you're describing. Nevertheless, persist with the wish to watch your own highly charged emotions. If you will do this with a wish to understand what is producing this kind of pressure in you, you will become gradually conscious of certain hidden emotions that are the source of these states.

Rousseau: I am thinking about compromise, particularly the difference in negative compromise and surrendering in a good way. It comes up in relationship after relationship, including work, family, everywhere! I wish to have more clarity when dealing with others to save myself from the frustrations that self-compromise brings, and to develop the ability to choose in favor of myself more.

GF: The only time that we feel like we must compromise is when we feel like we can't win. That's where the negativity comes in. Any situation we're in with others where we're trying to win, has already caused us to lose something of ourselves. Try to notice where it is you want to "come out on top" and dare to let go of Rousseau in these moments. That's proper surrender. In that action, there is no compromise.

dhaselhoff: What advice would you give to a student who has a real hard time concentrating?

GF: Attention is a faculty of ours. It can be developed or strengthened according to one's realization for the need of this feature. It is our awakened need for some element of our own undeveloped consciousness that is the stimulant and ultimately the provider of what we need. There are exercises for developing one's attention in my book, The Lost Secrets of Prayer. You might start there.

Grayson: Sometimes when I catch my thoughts, I tend to see how this most recent thought came about by tracing the cause/effect of the line of previous thoughts before it, and sometimes come upon one originating thought born from an exterior experience that started it all. Is this practice worthwhile to pursue?

GF: Anything we can do to increase our understanding of the “thought machine” helps free us from its mechanical life.

nobush: The last time I talked to you, you said (in reference to anger): "Is a little fire better in your hand than a big fire?" Would this apply to all negative emotion we identify with?

GF: Absolutely.

stevie: When I am presented with a moment that causes conflict in me, I get muddled and confused in my eagerness to understand and use the situation. Should observing come before understanding the moment?

GF: Getting muddled and confused in any given moment often indicates that we are trying to defeat or overcome the moment. Best if you were to learn what it means to come to an interior stop and catch the parts of you that want to win in the moment, that want to prove yourself in the moment, and just let these go. Working like that will help you to watch the whole of the moment and yourself better.

jaybird: Is there such thing as "social responsibility" or "social justice" in the context of the spiritual path? If so, how is it defined (and practiced)?

GF: The idea of social responsibility and social justice was created by people who want power or authority over others who are not acting according to their morality. There is such thing as responsibility and justice, however. They are natural features of an awakened mind and actions that occur spontaneously in true conscience.

hudnut: Is it possible for a human being to be afraid of divine love (agape)? And if so, how does one go about addressing such a condition? (Could it be merely a fear of the unknown?)

GF: The physical being, the flesh as Saint Paul called it, is incapable of divine love. It has no relationship to it, and therefore instinctively resists it. Don't be concerned about how to address the birth of divine love in yourself. Merely work at inviting this higher relationship between yourself and God, and God will do in your spirit what is necessary for it to become his beloved.

RAY: Is it our birth right to be abundant?

GF: The answer is yes, but if by "abundant" you mean wealthy, powerful, and packed with social position, the answer is no. True abundance is spiritual in nature, and all other forms of abundance are secret emptiness because they are in time and must ultimately dissolve.

James1: Is it wrong (opposite of Truth) to want or have worldly abundance? I know the problem of identifying with such things.

GF: The real question ought to be: “Can one fill the hole in one’s soul with things of this earth?” And the answer is what you must find. When you do, you will have the answer to your question.

Rael: Where is true knowing found? By this I mean that the only way I presently know that I know anything is to have a mental conversation with an imagined person in which I am explaining to him what I know or don't know. But this knowing is temporary, and ultimately proves itself wrong, or at least useless.

GF: What you have said is the beginning of knowing, and you don't have to think to know that. True knowing is a quiet, passive state of a mind that is whole in itself and to itself, in which it is an instrument and a witness to a certain order of Intelligence that knows without thinking what is right, true, and necessary.

BNevrgivup: In your weekly update, you discussed "Public Opinion," and our dependence on favorable views of our self. This is a trap, as you put it. What if you are hated unjustly and rejected unjustly? How do we cope with this situation and the constant fear of rejection which we cannot control?

GF: I have said the following before, but I'll restate it. The only thing that troubles us or frightens us about another person, is what we secretly want from that person. When, through our inner work, we realize (as scripture states) that only God is good, then we will cease to look to others for anything other than natural social interaction.

RAY: In order to go beyond the mind, do you meditate and focus on the silence between thoughts?

GF: Try to understand the following. It's deep. The self that wants to go beyond the mind is a fabrication of the mind it wants to go beyond. When mind sees the truth of what I have just told you, it quiets on its own. Then, the natural state of silence is realized as the ground of that same mind.

jaybird: You (and others who teach higher principles) often counsel us to "drop" negative emotions when we become aware of them. Yet, these feelings often seem to stubbornly refuse to be dropped! Why is this and how can it remedied?

GF: No negative state is truly yours. These conditions are either leftovers of some conditioning, or visitors of some natural expression. Either way, the reason that we can't get rid of negative states is because by trying to get rid of them we identify with them. The awakened mind sees these levels of being without deriving a sense of itself through their being.

Rousseau: One superficial question on the Vernon Howard we sometimes bring up… when I search for his work in the public library, I get results of children's books. I'm curious if this author is the same author as you studied with?

GF: Mr. Howard was, in his early days, a prolific writer of children's books.

barry: There is the idea of the middle way, and then there is the idea of total non-identification with the negative state. So where did the Buddhists get the middle way from?

GF: To not be identified with negative states does not mean that one sits and judges the state and then decides not to be identified with it. All forms of judgment are forms of identification. Real non-identification is born out of a mind that understands that it is not what it sees. We are not the thoughts and feelings that we see pass through us, but become them when we identify with their content.

barry: So do we end discouragement through simply non-identification with it, or is there something more to it at a thought level?

GF: Everything begins with bringing our awareness to any condition as it arises within us. This light of awareness penetrates all states of self and discerns from an Intelligence its true nature. Through it we are given the correct action to take toward the state, etc.

LMAC: I've been overweight since I was a small child. I'm learning to be awake as I am eating, but I can see myself still eating beyond the point of physical satisfaction. Do you have some books or materials that may help me see this insidious problem I've had for over forty years?

GF: I invite you to e-mail Chris through our "Contact Us" page and ask her for tape #205 entitled "The Truth that Frees Us from the Addictive Nature." I believe it will help you with your present condition and wish for freedom from it.

Kraig: How do we tell the difference between Truth and the false mind?

GF: Just as one knows the difference between a star and a shark… one lends light and the other “bites!”

barry: I'm a rock 'n roll musician. Most of the lyrics are negative, I guess. So should I just drop my love of this music? I know you were a musician at one time. Is this why you stopped?

GF: Why would one drop what one loves because others do what is not loving? Be your own artist until you no longer wish to pursue the craft. I stopped because I began another path.

Langston: I was watching the Lakers game yesterday. I noticed my aversion for them because they are show-offs, have too much talent, etc. Then, it occurred to me. When I am at work, and I know more then someone else, I show off! Would this prove to be living from a level of existence whose nature is divided? If so, what is my next step?

GF: What you report is a good indication of what is the seed of compassion. We never judge anything so harshly (in others) as we have hidden from ourselves in us. Ask God, the Truth, to show you more – and then be willing to see what appears before your inner eyes.

Suzannemly: Do you think seeking a spiritual mentor, someone you actually spend physical time with, is preferable to self-study, reading, chats such as this? If so, any suggestions for finding such a mentor?

GF: The student who seeks light must eventually seek this, and some accept a candle while others want to be near the sun. Each must follow the dictates of his or her own awakening heart.

straydog: I'm still not getting over my friend who died. I've read many of the things that you've told us about grieving; I've stood there and left the empty gulf empty. But still many times the gulf is bottomless, and your advice is just words that bounce off me. My experience is (now I'm just guessing) probably similar to when you lost your friend Vernon, but on my own scale. I wish that I were as awake as you were. I'm in big trouble here… what now?

GF: Grief that persists is secretly a negative state of self that keeps itself “alive” by holding an image of what it has lost in order to continue feeling lost and alone. You must come to see the truth of this by witnessing yourself calling up this image so that then you can feel the pain associated with it.

Grayson: Can you give me some insight into how I can handle the following situations? I have friends with whom I enjoy spending time. We work together and with other very negative people. My friends have always thrown back at them what they dish out. With my new insights into the truth, I do not. I have thoughts that tell me my friends cannot understand me, and thus deem me "weaker" or "inferior" for just walking away.

GF: What matters is not what such “friends” think. Besides, truth be known, what you think are their thoughts are secretly your own (about them).

kobya: I've been working on myself for some time now and know I have grown to some degree. Recently something I considered "bad" for me occurred and I allowed a hatred for Truth to own me for a month and was negative to everyone. Now it seems I've lost some of my desire for Truth. Any thoughts or encouragement?

GF: These incidents are somewhat to be expected. You should know that anything in you that “hates” the truth is not you, but a false nature that drags you down into its considerations and that then punishes you for its ill deeds. Just drop this sense of self when it appears, and remember what you love, not what it tells you that you don’t love.

confusedwilly: How can I obtain peace? Is peace such an abstract thing that one may find it hard to maintain?

GF: Peace is the natural fruit of a quiet mind and a heart that has reconnected with the Living Light within it. We do not “maintain” this higher state of self, but it maintains us when we will put its Life first (in us).

kobya: I know I can't be happy in my current career because it requires me doing things I am not comfortable with. I truly feel I will never be comfortable with these aspects and finally (after years) see that nothing is wrong with feeling this way. I fear quitting though because of what may happen to me. What do you suggest?

GF: These moments are difficult, but critical in the development of our soul and its relationship with the Light of God. We see (our situation) by this light and see the “darkness” in it. You may be assured (but not comforted, yet) that the Light that reveals this condition will guide you safely out of it into something better suited for (its) development (in you). But you will have to “risk” the fear you feel to learn the truth of this relationship.

GF: Before our chat time on-line runs its course, I would like to pass along the remaining notes from my opening remarks. We are inquiring into what is required of us to realize our relationship with the Eternal Truth that lives within us.

As a quick review for those of you not with us at the beginning, and to refresh the minds of those who were, I introduced the idea of our inherent spiritual longing to search for, find, and to realize "Heaven" on earth. Added to this thought was how elusive this state of self-wholeness seems to be, regardless of how, or where, we have been conditioned to search for this, our "bliss."

Then, with regards to how to realize this unanswered need we have for the Supersensual Life, we touched on what the ancients called the "Invisible Eternals," the Timeless Principles that serve as the secret foundation of all that exists. We left off with the idea that awakening to these Higher Realities is one and the same as realizing our (God-given) True Self.

Our need to discover and realize these Invisible Eternals cannot be over- stated because, the truth is, we are their embodiment. It is this same fact that makes it possible for us to awaken to their existence, align ourselves with their will, and to realize our oneness with them. Now let's take one of these Timeless Principles and see how exploring its Wisdom increases our own.

One Timeless Principle that is evidenced throughout creation is that all things "lesser" have their origin in something "greater." For instance, the branch owes its being to the vine from which it originates; the rivers run back to the seas that give them birth. And so it is when it comes to these Invisible Eternals; amongst them are found "greater" and "lesser" Truths.

With these insights to guide us, let's look into one of the greatest of these Principles taught by every great teacher since time began. In these so-called progressive times, this all but forgotten Principle is as simple as it is prophetic: "We reap what we sow." Share this fact with someone who hates his life and he will hate you for the truth you tell about why he feels as he does!

Everywhere you look today people are only concerned with getting what they want, when they want it, and as fast as possible. The fires that fuel their appetite (for this envisioned success) create so much smoke that they lose sight of the fact that all they reap for their insistent sowing is one regret after another. And of course when things go badly, there is always someone to blame.

If we are ever to realize our Timeless True Self, if we long for heaven on earth while we live here, then we must sow the seeds that help bring that Higher Life into fruition. One cannot expect to reap what one does not sow, and imagining or hoping for a higher life is not the sowing of true spiritual seeds any more than dreaming about climbing a mountain is the same as reaching its top.

To sow spiritual seeds means that we do spiritual work. Spiritual work is always interior work first, even if, as a matter of course, this work becomes manifested through some outer or social action. What is this interior work by which we sow the seeds of the celestial within us? Following are four ways to work at sowing the seeds of a Higher Life.

1. We must learn not to burden others or ourselves with our disappointments, fearful future visions, or past regrets even as, in the same moment, we learn to ask Truth for more insight into those unseen aspects of our present nature that is, at once, reaping its regrets even as it sows more of the same dark seeds.

2. We must learn to sit quietly with ourselves and wait patiently for the Light of God's Peace to replace those dark, noisy thoughts and feelings telling us we have too much old baggage to make the Journey Home. Each time we sow these seeds through some quiet meditation, we reap the strength that comes with realizing that this Silence that comes to us is our real Home.

3. We must learn to remember our intention to start our whole life over every moment we awaken to find ourselves reliving some past conflict. To sow these seeds of a refreshed outlook born of remembering that our True Life is always New, is to let go of who we have been and to begin reaping a life free of anger and fear.

4. We must learn to look our fears, our weariness, our anxiety, directly in the eye and, instead of seeing what is impossible (according to their view of life), sow the seeds of a whole new possibility by consciously daring to doubt their dark view of things. Our refusal to identify with self-limiting negative states reaps us the reward of realizing ever-new and higher realities.

The key lesson here is that it is not enough to just sow seeds in this physical life, regardless of how sublime they may seem when we set them out. Even those seeds that "succeed" in rewarding us for our effort can only grow forms that must fall in time. If we wish Heaven, Wholeness, Love, and Light to fill our lives, then we must sow their Eternal Seeds within us. That is the Work.

Make your own list of ways to work at sowing the seeds of a New Life, being careful to remember the infallible Principle behind another of the Invisible Eternals: the inner determines the outer. Set yourself to the task of being an inwardly awake person and watch how you begin to reap the awareness that makes all things possible.

Our time has run out. Take time to study tonight's lessons and you sow the seeds of Truth in your mind and heart. Then do the inner work that truth shows you as being needful to do, which it will. The rest of it all just happens according to the Invisible Eternals that are now at work within you.

And now, good night everyone; see you next month on Thursday, April 3, same time and place. Until then . . .

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GF: Hello and welcome. Before we begin tonight I would like to introduce you to some new ideas intended to help us transform these disturbing times on earth into something of great spiritual benefit.

If one has any sensitivity, then one must ask: Why is there so much hatred everywhere? What has happened that human beings are so willing to destroy each other, and at the same time feel so justified for the terror they champion? How is it that fear rules the day and drives the world to an edge that it manages to extend with each passing hour? Why can't there be peace on earth?

But to these same questions we must add one more -- a probing inquiry not so easy to entertain because it begins with turning around one's outwardly pointed finger of judgment. We must ask: What is my role in this madness? Am I really just the spectator I imagine myself to be, innocent of the sickness I see everywhere -- or am I part of the ignorance whose pain seeks to destroy peace?

We must not fear such questions, as fear is ignorance actuated. The truth is, and always has been (in its simplest spiritual equation), that we are the world we see; we are each, within, microcosmic versions of the global conflict going on around us. We despise the day that deprives us of our happiness, mentally crushing anyone blamed for our loss. And we are never wrong in our judgment.

So we see, the Wise teach truly: The inner does determine the outer. There cannot be peace (on earth) until one's heart is at peace. A mind at peace punishes neither itself nor anyone else. The work to understand these truths begins with no longer trying to create an imagined peace, but with awakening to what it is within us that believes it already knows the true nature of peace.

Any awakening implies the sudden realization that one has been asleep to another order of reality. So it is true with our wish to awaken to what is wrecking us. And just as a friend might gently nudge us to help bring us out of a nightmare, there have been truths sown into this world whose purpose is to show us where we are asleep to reality and living out a bad dream.

We first meet these timeless and eye opening truths in the form of new and higher self-knowledge such as follows: We cannot make ourselves peaceful, any more than we can make silence. Silence already exists in any space once we stop making noises in it. The same holds true of peace. Real peace is already in place, and we need only stop creating conflict to realize its grace.

Simply stated: We are not at peace within ourselves because we are at war within ourselves. And because we have yet to learn how to enter this interior battle, armed with the one force that transforms dark fires into mild Light, we do not comprehend the actual nature of this internal conflict. Again we meet the need for new and greater self-knowledge, beginning with this Key Lesson:

Until we realize that continually identifying with our own conflicting desires about how to win peace of mind is like using a cannon blast to light a candle, we will only remain at war within ourselves -- all the while blaming the world around us for its insensitive inability to grant us that imagined peace we so desperately seek!

It was said by Christ, which should be self-evident, that "A house divided cannot stand." The problem is, we are not conscious of this division within us, so that we are virtually unaware of our own conflicting desires. This inner struggle continues unabated because the sensation of a pleasure promised by one desire outweighs the pain of its secret opposition.

The obvious note here is that a pain masked by a more prominent pleasure does not end their conflict, and the misery in the soul that suffers this battle remains intact even if the physical body isn't conscious of this continuous conflict. Let's illuminate, by example, a few of these conflicting desires and end their power over us. Our peace will follow as sunlight after the passing storm.

One desire we all share is that we want to be loved and approved of by everyone everywhere. To accomplish this we believe we must be worthy, which requires our becoming a bigger "success" than whomever it is that is seen as competing with us for this craved attention. What other choice have we -- given the importance of our task -- but to step on a few people on our way to the top?

Can we see how our initial desire causes conflict and actually creates an effect the very opposite of the one it intended at the outset? Living in fear that we won't win the approval we seek, we have no choice but to do whatever is necessary to accomplish our end. So we hurt others by running over them to reach our goal. We destroy the very love and respect we wanted on our way to winning it!

Another example of secretly conflicting desires is how we all long to think of ourselves as being free and independent of others. But unseen in this want of ours hides another (and contrary) desire to which we are also attached: We only feel like we have reached this elevated state of independence as long as others recognize what we have done! We require others to confirm our freedom!

There are many other examples of such inner contradictions worth witnessing. There is our intermittent desire to be left alone -- even as we feel left out or ignored if our friends don't call us because they miss our company. The point should be as obvious. We suffer from our own cross-purposes and find ourselves unable (at present) to see our way out from under their conflict.

Before we close our chat tonight, I will highlight some important new ideas about what one must understand (and work at) to realize his or her own soul state of spiritual peace.

What do you feel like discussing tonight? What have you been working on within yourself and how can we use this time together to grow in a new understanding that leads us to a higher inner peace?

James1: When we worry, do we send out some sort of unseen "beacon" to the rest of the world? The other day at the office seemed to degrade so rapidly for everyone when I know personally I became so concerned over something.

GF: Yes, absolutely. Unseen but nevertheless so, is that you are never around another human being without the two "atmospheres" meeting and mingling. This is why it's so important to attend to one's self and one's inner state, as the person most asleep in any relationship is invariably dominated by the "air" of the other person.

Purpleperson: I feel myself getting caught in the vicious cycle of this -- the more problems in the world, the more worried I become, the more worried I become, the more anger and conflict I cause for myself and others around me, and the more things don't "go well", etc. I find myself caught in the cycle and unable (unwilling?) to stop it.

GF: The world feeds on this vicious cycle that it creates through its own unconscious acts. This is why all True teachings have conveyed the idea that we must learn what it means to be in this world but not of it. As far as exiting this sorry circle of social life, it is possible with new understanding and willingness to do the work necessary. At the close of the chat I will speak directly about how we learn to let go of what is tearing the world apart within us.

Matteo: I am from NYC and feel very scared at the progression of events lately. Is my desire to get as far away from here as possible fear or is it practical thought?

GF: It's probably a mixture of both. Work to be as quiet inwardly as you can so that you may rely upon Silence to tell you the difference between self-exciting fears of what may be versus the intuition that understands that certain places naturally attract certain events to them. Do this and you'll become clear on what action to take.

digger: A state of negativity is created in me when someone is being mean to someone I like. I want to lash back at the abusive person to protect the person I like. How do I deal with this kind of situation? How do I deal with myself?

GF: Try to understand that the pain you feel when watching someone be unkind to another is secretly pain that you are placing upon yourself by first identifying with an image of that person and then calling upon the content of your own past pained experiences to tell you what this (imagined) person is going through. In short, we lash ourselves mentally and blame events physically. See this.

kidd1: I am a peaceful person and wish to hurt nobody. I carry a gun as it is my legal right and because of the violence in our society. If I leave it at home I feel something missing. Is this wrong?

GF: Would you ask me this question if you didn't already know the answer to it? Violence resisted can only escalate. Fear embraced crushes the world that looks to it to save it from itself. No negative action can produce a positive outcome for the person who is limited to seeing only things in the dark.

kidd1: Please, with all due respect, have you ever had your life threatened, lived in a violent neighborhood or been faced with the strong possibility of being robbed/lied to/betrayed?

GF: The short answer is yes; but this is not essential to the real question: Why does one remain in a jungle where the likelihood of animal attack is ten times that of a person living outside such an environment?

GypsyHawk: I understand that when someone does something personally negative to the self, one should let it go, drop it, and walk away. However, if one wishes to debate a topic and directs their opinion to you for an argument and you know they are wrong, is it right to continue the conversation with them to show them what you have seen to be true? An example would be the US aggression in Iraq.

GF: As a rule, no. Those who fight with others to prove they are right are in no different state than those who are "wrong" that they would show this to. Christ often "showed" this, and actually spoke it when he said: "Cast not thy pearls before swine."

Randy: You have said that "evil exists in this world." Should we eradicate the evil in the Iraq crisis or must peace and love prevail? We certainly can't "turn the other cheek" in a post 9/11 world. What are your thoughts?

GF: Evil cannot be eradicated by violence, regardless of how well intended these actions may be.

steveb: Do you have an opinion on prophesies that say a nuclear bomb will be detonated on populated cities in 2006, or does it waste our positive energy to consider such dire predictions? Along these lines I wonder what you think about the ugly prospects in the Middle East we are all anticipating?

GF: It is not only a waste of our energy to consider negative predictions, but such considerations secretly help create the very event feared.

JS: I feel that I have no inner strength to protect me from the attacks of ravening others. How can I have true strength (not posturing) that never wavers?

GF: You have to learn what it means to become invisible. What does this mean? Throw a knife at a tree and the knife sticks because the knife and the tree have similar material natures. Throw an angry remark at an awakening person and the anger passes through that man or woman because he or she no longer finds any interest in intercepting such negative forces.

mikejb35: Is it wrong to use constructive imagining to visualize where I want to be in my career and life eventually, or does this automatically engender the "opposites"?

GF: As a rule, the visualization itself is a manifestation of something resisted, or as you said, an opposite. Visualization is effective (I believe) when it comes to healing the body or learning to swing a golf club according to principle. Other uses tend to strengthen the self that calls upon the imagery for the purposes of creating its "future." This future and the self are false, and usually a source of secret conflict.

GypsyHawk: I understand the value in being in the present and staying objective to my thoughts, but if we have career goals we want to manifest, is the practice of visualization of future goals compatible to present awareness? And if so, then would that entail that thoughts can be very positive and practical in the forging of our desired lives?

GF: One cannot dream and be awake at the same time – they are antithetical states. The problem with goals in the future is that they exist for the self imagining them as the means to peace and contentment in a time to come. We cannot make peace. We cannot make happiness. We can drug ourselves and excite ourselves, but never know the True solace that comes with an awakened spiritual life.

GypsyHawk: I write, and would like to publish my work. If future visualization is a dream, then can I use it now to hone my writing in the present?

GF: What you have asked is not clear to me, but here is one good piece of advice: follow what your heart tells you is the best path, but while you walk, learn to watch the results of the steps you are taking. Let no one tell you who or what you should do or be; to do so is to lose your chance to develop.

SJ711: I find myself struggling for hours on particular inner work issues without receiving answers, but don't know if the struggling I'm going through is a product of the false-self or my higher-self doing inner work. I meditate and relax and answers still don't come. Then I say to myself this struggling is my false-self and that I need to let go. When I let go, instantly a voice in my heads tells me I'm avoiding the problem and the inner work. I don't know what to do. Does inner work consist of struggling for the answer in the same sense as we struggle at a complex calculus problem or should I just ignore that voice and let go and the answers will flow in effortlessly and smoothly?

GF: See if this applies: Answers to pains cannot be found at the same level as the pain that makes the request. Thinking cannot resolve thinking no matter how much thinking one does. Don't look for answers, instead try to be conscious of the disturbance within you that then sends "you" (its secret opposite) out looking for an answer. This search is resistance, not the path to realization.

ADB What is the absolute root cause of this nascent pain we all share?

GF: Creation.

ndee: What is the solution?

GF: Conscious relationship.

ADB: Creation.... so this is something that (obviously) we can't do much about as far as ridding ourselves of it. We were born with it? If so, it sounds kind of hopeless.

GF: To the contrary: we are deeply and meaningfully involved in this process, and the true fulfillment of ourselves, of our soul, and spiritual possibilities are all tied to this relationship.

ADB: In last month's chatroom you said: "Desires in themselves are not destructive, it is the sense of self we derive from them that destroys all forms of love." I may have misinterpreted your teachings on this. I thought (you said before) desire equates to being asleep to the resistance to where we are (not). Clarify my interpretive contradiction please.

GF: See if this helps. There are natural desires that are themselves expressions of needful opposites seeking wholeness. Of themselves, these energetic states present no problem nor stumbling block to self-realization. It is once we have become identified with the sensation the desire produces that we form an attachment to its opposite. It is the attachment and the sense of self connected to it that causes self-compromise and self-defeat.

kidd1: I have this obsession with the possibility of contracting HIV. I'm not afraid of dying, yet I'm afraid of this, and it has gotten to the point where I cannot function too well with my loved one because I now see sex as a task and obstacle. How can I put this into perspective without ignoring this very real problem that people contract due to their urges and ignorance? I need real help.

GF: One cannot be careful enough with regards to intimate relationships. Having said this, if you doubt the integrity of the person you are having relations with, then the issue of becoming infected from his or her infidelity should be secondary. That aside, try to recognize that all fears psychologically have their root in negative imagination. Drop the bad movie and you drop the fear.

mobilman: When we have an experience with God and that experience fades into the past, is the memory of that experience something we need to let go of, or is it also "timeless"?

GF: Any true moment of relationship with what is Higher within us changes that nature that experienced that moment to some extent. We must not "live" from remembering such sensations, as it is what is un-living in us that seeks such experience from what was.

mobilman: If we were to forget our experience with the One who has revealed Himself to us… how could we remember our Aim?

GF: I never said to forget our relationship with what is Divine. What I said is that we must drop trying to relive any moment of grace that has come our way. We are not on earth to relive anything. We are here to live within the Divine, which can only occur for us once we see through the false pleasure of reliving what was (either pleasurable or painful).

SHADY: You said to not live from past spiritual experiences and that it is the other nature within us that wants that. But the spiritual experience in itself changes us, and shouldn't that be considered an extraordinary moment, one treasured?

GF: The true spiritual life has nothing to do with treasures remembered.

ADB: I'm aware that I'm feeling this very familiar "heaviness." Because I can tell I am in this state, does that mean I am (partially) aware, or am I truly asleep by the simple fact that I am in this state and am (obviously) valuing its purpose?

GF: It's essential to be able to tell the difference between one's awareness of a negative state, or one being absorbed by that same state. One way to tell is that one is aware of a certain kind of suffering versus only being resistant to that suffering and calling this being aware. There is always a certain degree of discomfort in being awake to oneself. This is because what is unenlightened "naturally" recoils at the onset of Light.

ADB So if I'm aware that I have a feeling of being "incomplete," then that starts the downward cycle?

GF: Only if you cling to the negative state that "tells" you "who" you are. You would not hold on to an anchor thrown into the water, so why cling to a dark state that can only pull you down?

bd: My lifelong biggest fear is not having enough money to survive, but whenever I get ahead, I lose it by taking chances to get more. Is this self- sabotage on my part? I've been on the path searching for truth with you and Vernon Howard for several years.

GF: Clearly this is self-sabotage. The idea that more of anything can make us happy belongs to a certain part of our psychology that is so totally inculcated, it does not know the difference between the promise of happiness and its fulfillment. Save your money. This one small act will help you see the wild and squandering self presently passing itself off as you.

ADB: Is it possible to have a keen understanding of a Truth teaching yet still be asleep to that teaching? I can relay some of these Truth teachings rote, yet still have areas of my life that are obviously untouched. Clarify please.

GF: The answer is yes. Truth Teachings are only words and mental structure. They do not bring the Truth they talk about; they merely point to such truths. One's task is to recognize the immense gulf that exists between how much he or she knows of such teachings and how little one's being reflects the wisdom of these teachings.

ADB: So the continuation of the recognition is simply to "just keep going/ persist"?

GF: Yes, we must persist with our work. But we must not just blindly struggle to "win" some imagined battle. Persistence purifies the one who will be awake to his actions, while it can punish someone who practices punishing himself with unconscious actions.

kidd1: Despite my accomplishments and growth, I seem to supplement my lack of a normal physical relationship with pornographic websites on a regular basis. I know this is wrong. How do I stop something that seems OK and self-serving? Please excuse the nature of this question.

GF: All sexual compulsion is the negative expression of energies meant for one's use having become twisted and turned to other (self-serving) uses. Only the Light of true self-seeing can restore this incumbent darkness to its natural state where it can be transformed for other purposes. With this in mind, see the following: There is no such thing as a compulsive pleasure, as anything one is made to serve, that makes him a slave of that state he is subjected to. See the truth of this.

jaywheel: I too suffered terribly with sexual addiction for over thirty years and have found freedom from lust through a 12-step program. I actually owe my life to the 12 steps and the Power that has released me from that particular bondage. This really works for those who are addicted. Could you please encourage those with this affliction to seek out recovery?

GF: I encourage anyone who is in pain to learn the real reason behind that pain so that the Truth they discover will free them not only from the pain that burdens them, but the former self that couldn't live without that pain.

Langston: Does addiction also thrive via unseen opposites within us (me)? If so, does the understanding/seeing of this truth serve as a pre-cursor for extinction?

GF: Yes, quite so; however "extinction" is not quite the right word. Better stated is that the Light transforms the darkness, and what remains is no longer destructive to us, but has become a new part of our understanding.

James1: Have you read "Power vs. Force" by David Hawkins? He describes measuring truthfulness through applied kinesiology. He explains how the body is connected to the collective consciousness. Comment please.

GF: There is no part of the world, let alone the human body as a microcosm of the universe itself, that does not reflect all principles, whether they are employed favorably or against the organism they inhabit.

JS: I feel that I am not being rewarded by life. Is pursuing one's dreams more likely to bring happiness than the practicality of working solely for a paycheck?

GF: If we can do what we love, there is nothing in the universe that can stand in the way of our success. By success, though, I mean a quiet mind, an opening heart, and agreement with Love itself to purify us and perfect us according to its nature. No other relationship in this world can touch this.

Roy: From your Tape of the Month talk entitled "Know Danger Hidden in Ideals," I see how I've always followed one ideal after another. I see that I've followed a thought-created image of my ever-changing ideals, and I feel now the punishment of that constant comparison. But if I drop these ideals, what then will be my guideposts? I aspire for a higher life outside of thought and time. Is that an ideal of a higher order?

GF: This is a certain point of the Path for those who persist, wherein they realize they must no longer provide for themselves any direction whatsoever taken from anything imagined. The intellectual nature is terrified at this prospect because it only knows motivation through sensation. However, there is a kind of Celestial current that runs through the soul, which we are invited to let carry us if we will simply stop driving ourselves.

Matteo: I come out of my body almost every night and travel all over the country, sometimes often meeting and "hanging out" with other beings. Is astral projection anything to be concerned about?

GF: If what you say is true, and this is a natural occurrence (meaning you are not taking unnatural steps to produce your perceived experience), then this is nothing to worry about or spend time thinking about. Watch, learn, and be patient. Keep your wish to be safe in Truth before you at all times.

Rael: The realization has been growing that I love daydreaming. I love the feelings I get of being the hero, wisely informing others, confronting the bully. For years I have tried to give up daydreams, but see that is only a false ruse. I see I am using these soothing feelings as places of refuge from the secret pains hidden within them -- pride, fear, guilt, etc. -- yet I remain attracted as a bee to honey. How can one be free from what he obviously loves?

GF: No man or woman will ever consciously compromise their own capacity for a relationship with the Higher. Daydreams can be as addictive psychologically as is opium physically. You must stop feeding the self that is serving this addiction as it is. Find an exercise in attention that will allow you to observe the daydream impulse instead of being carried away by it. You must work at this if you want freedom from it.

Beckycs: I can sense the truth in "the inner determines the outer" and I also believe that the physical body, given the correct nutrients, can heal itself. I have been suffering a lot from physical pain for the last ten years, in spite of all the different things I have tried. Is it a true course to even desire healing to take place?

GF: It is natural to want to be whole. This being said, it is given to us to understand that most of the pain we are in when it comes to physical ailments, has to do with the pain born of not wanting to be in pain. One can use everything, including pain, to realize greater and higher degrees of wholeness. Resistance divides, awareness encompasses.

bruce57: I have heard strong testimonials on affirmations. One such teacher believes you could make things happen by increasing your mental pictures and make things work for you. I don't like the way this sounds, and it seems ungodly, however I have noticed some things working in that direction within my own unconsciousness. Can this really work, and is this right?

GF: Your intuition that such actions are ungodly is founded in Truth. We imagine that we know what we need, and even when we get it, fail to see that we then imagine why it didn't fulfill us, and then turn to imagination again to restart this cycle. This world, and all things in it that can be imagined, is incapable of helping a person (through its objects) find peace of heart and kindness of soul.

Diojeneez: If we can be aware in any circumstance, any place, and at any time, then is there really a need to intellectualize everything? Even in our confusions, can't we just be aware, since it all comes down to awareness anyway?

GF: Yes, of course. How can the darkness of confusion resolve confusion over anything? Darkness begets darkness. Light not only begets Light, but it changes whatever darkness it enters into by clarifying its matter. Clarity is spiritual wisdom.

Purpleperson: How does one know if they are really giving things over to God, or just "justifying" things by saying it must have been God's voice?

GF: There's an old saying that goes something like "by their fruits you will know them." There is no substitute for action when it comes to wishing for Truth to be one's guide. We start the journey, Truth finishes it. If after a few steps you fall in a hole you didn't see, get rid of the guide.

Rousseau: What is meant by the phrase "physician heal thyself" in terms of our work here?

GF: The passage you refer to was an instruction Christ gave when speaking to someone who was judging and condemning someone else. The point being that no one can heal another individual of something they have not already been healed of themselves. Then, if a correction is given, there is no harshness in it, but is born of the humility of having seen the same sickness in himself.

bruce57: You have said that "future cannot be seen due to the level of conscience that wants to see it." Is this level of conscience the same limitation as in not "getting" certain truths at certain times when studying or worshiping (despite your repeated efforts)? What can I do to always be receptive besides remembering to be awake?

GF: Vernon Howard often gave talks based on the principle that "resistance to the disturbance is the disturbance." When we see the truth of this dark play of the opposites within us, then we let go of wanting what one side of this pair of punishing thoughts said would answer the pain. At that moment, both the self that was seeking and the solution sought after fall away. Stay awake and watch.

mikejb35: I would like to redirect the path of my career at this time. I know what is coming up in my present career path is not to my interest, but there is something else which interests me greatly. How do I proceed?

GF: There is a chapter in my book, Design Your Destiny, entitled "Take the Conscious Risk." It applies perfectly to your present position. May I suggest you read this if you have the book, or order the book if you haven't yet seen it. As always, if the material doesn't shed valuable light on the problem described, you may return it to the Foundation for a full refund. Contact Chris through this website.

ADB: When I went to the Grand Canyon this summer (one of your talks inspired me), I found myself experiencing voices that seemed to appear when I let myself stand near the edge (not close) and become aware of the true space below me. When I did this, I heard voices saying to me "jump," and I actually envisioned myself doing this. That scared me.

GF: We must learn what it means "not to do the devils work" (for him).

digger: Any thoughts on what is a good way to share my Work with others, particularly my kids?

GF: Be as consciously kind as you can be, which means to not express (but watch instead) your negative states. Be as encouraging as possible without producing false hope. Speak the truth at all times without being cruel or unnecessarily over-correcting. And when asked for what you think is right, dare to speak it in spite of the consequences.

jaywheel: Here is something, seemingly small, but I experience a great deal of pain and conflict in it. Perhaps an example would be best: Our kitchen needs a cleaning. I visualize myself enjoying the process -- very pleasant -- until I actually am in the kitchen! Then an anxiety and resistance takes over, and I am compelled to put it off for another time when I will be more in the mood. How to take action? What does this tell me about what I need to be working on?

GF: Your observations are clear and good. All negative states, including those of resistance to work needful of being done, are produced by a part of ourselves that would have us believe a greater pleasure exists elsewhere than where we need to be working. See that it uses pain to get you to walk away from what needs to be done. Now go through this pain. On the other side of the resistance is the flow. But you must walk through the state to negate it.

bd: If we seek Truth and stay in the present moment, and really mean it with all our heart, will Truth suddenly envelop us?

GF: All things Divine are between God and the one to whom he chooses to reveal himself.

noww: I have found from your help that I love nothing more than God, truth, and growing daily. Thank you! I am still working at this despite my financial problems. I'm flat broke, late on all bills, and still staying on the path. What's wrong? I know truth has nothing to do with currency, but it can't be too right to have this much wrong. Any suggestions?

GF: Apart from doing what you must to take care of what is practical and essential, i.e., a small place to live, decent food to eat, and clothes for warmth, never mind the rest of it. No one can ask Truth for help with a sincere heart and not receive an answer, even if that answer is to show that person that their sincerity was not as deep as he had imagined. Either way it's an answer, and leads to the next step.

SHADY: When you see someone close to you crying out because of a weakness you now realize they have (where before you would argue with this person over this situation), what is the best way to handle their insecurity so that they can maybe see that their insecurity isn't real at all?

GF: Because we fear space within ourselves, we often deny it to those around us. Give everyone that you can all the room they need (meaning don't interfere with their development) in order to witness themselves as they are without having to add resistance to you in the moment.

Bill: I work in computer software. At work today I was struck by the tremendous will to believe in magic solutions that software will bring. Can you comment on our desire to believe in magic?

GF: Whatever magic we call on to free ourselves from pain is black magic.

noww: Do you feel it's OK to pursue business solely for financial gain? I thought I had an interest due to my aptitude, but see nothing but darkness in the financial workings. Should I drop business?

GF: It isn't business that has to be dropped, but the sense of self that is produced through identifying with whatever it is that thinks that "business" can change its life. Anyone who lives strictly for financial gain loses everything, including the possibility of a God-centered life.

LarryY: I have been aware of the truth since I was five, however my mind persists on judging negatively. I have made persistent efforts to be quiet, i.e., meditating. Perhaps I need to be noisier, i.e., socialize, work hard, create work through the emotional baggage which seems to be unable or unwilling (I'm not sure which) to let go of.

GF: If you will read through the ideas (and the insights they hold) in the closing comments to this chat, I believe you will realize something new that will help you to take new steps towards authentic self-liberation.

Langston: I am noticing how I react to my own reactions to what the Light reveals. If I see dishonesty, I react with fear that I could have been so negative. Then I react with condemnation for being fearful of that negative state. Then I react with condemnation for being dishonest in the first place, for if I weren't so dishonest, I wouldn't have to deal with the initial fear of that negativity. All this constant chatter goes on and on. Is identification of the initial negative state the cause of all this chatter? Do I have to learn what it means to see dishonesty without becoming it…whether that means to just be dishonest or condemn myself for it?

GF: The answer is yes, identification with the initial state observed drives the machine now making you miserable. Drop the second reaction to what you see. The first reaction will be unavoidable for a while. The second reaction, i.e., the chain of judgment and self-incrimination, is only taking place because you consent to the conflict it produces. Stay awake.

TRUTHLOVER: I read some of your bio and noted your time with Vernon Howard. Did you relocate for this? If so, did you leave family and friends, or were you blessed with proximity to such availability? Would you recommend one relocate if they have never before left home, job, environment?

GF: I would always recommend that one do all they can to be as near a source of Truth as possible. If however one has family or responsibilities due to past involvements, clear up these issues and then draw near to what the heart longs for. For those who long for Truth, there is no substitute for giving up what Truth asks for that relationship.

SJ711: How do we distinguish and discern if a spiritual teacher, group, or organization operates out of the manipulation and persuasion of a cult? For now I just stay away and stick to authors like you, but when some groups are brought before me, I'm not sure at all and I feel fear because I can't discern. So now after years of meditating I don't go to any groups or teachers. I just listen to my inner feelings and they guide me, but I honestly feel like I don't know if certain gurus and groups are acting out of truth. Now I feel like I'm not participating, and I feel guilt for not getting involved. How do I discern?

GF: There is no doubt that many (if not most) so-called teachers and groups these days are promulgating in the dark because they secretly strengthen dark parts of those drawn to them. Caution is necessary, but fear is counter-productive. Learn to trust the "taste" you receive in encounters, and do not second guess such intuition because of a secondary need to feel like you "belong" to something. Psychological fears protect the fearful self.

noww: What is your understanding on tithing? The Bible speaks about it, and it sounds great, but I don't understand how people who do the exact opposite are loaded with money. They obviously do not contribute.

GF: Give because you know it is right (in some instance) -- or because you feel gratitude for something you have received from some organization of your choosing. Never give for fear someone disapproves of you, or especially if a group "demands" these gifts.

Diojeneez: I have a terrible attitude towards high school which I think is sloth. My motivation comes and goes. Sometimes I feel I'm not even learning. I end up goofing off with friends and throwing paper balls in class. I feel like a total wreck at times. What can I do with myself to fix this?

GF: Get weary of being used by sloth-like parts of yourself that want you to believe you can grow by doing nothing to learn. Leave anyone behind who encourages you to act in this negligence. These people want friends to fall with.

GypsyHawk: I would like to know if I am on the right track: I seem to have been seeking approval from people my mind tells me I cannot have approval from, and I have been catching myself in this. I now look at the world objectively, without concerning myself with what it means to me, but rather what each person or thing means to itself.

GF: This sounds reasonable, and will not damage your work – as long as you are not pretending not to care about these things through the mechanism of this kind of separation.

TRUTHLOVER: After watching a show on TLC, I realized how much of "not us" there is than "us." I must admit, this made me feel like my work of 4-5 years has not yet even begun. What would you recommend to someone who wishes to touch the infinite and enter into the spiritual world as much as possible, gain insight, understanding, limitlessness, and utilize God's creations for the good that exists?

GF: Wake up.

mikejb35: I can "hear" a thought pop up in my mind very quietly, and then "hear" my mind repeat it louder. What is this a manifestation of?

GF: Thought amplifying itself for the purpose of strengthening the opposites in order to stimulate sensations in the mind, etc.

SJ711: Why did the church use fear to control the masses around 500 A.D. by condemning metaphysics, the natural laws of the universe, and psychic ability, etc.? What happened? Billions are still blinded by this persuasion. I also heard that it's a possibility that Jesus didn't die on the cross and that he and Mary Magdalene went to Rennes (the château in France) where they married and gave birth to children. I would appreciate your comments.

GF: You will know the answers to these questions when you discover the parts of yourself that are one and the same with the council (then and now) that worked to destroy Christ's teachings. Such awakenings are essential to true rebirth.

Ringo: I am working on an anger problem. I feel it bubble up and I try to watch it until it fades, but I seem to explode. What can I do to overcome this?

GF: Stay with your wish to watch this condition instead of being used by it. Remember we are not trying to become stronger than the savage in us, but to bring this un-regenerated nature into the Light that does the work "for us."

Diojeneez: There are mystics who say we become like those who we surround ourselves with. But if you are in the Light, how can you become like those in the dark?

GF: A true mystic would no more hang out with dark souls than an eagle would be found in a cave with bats!

Diojeneez: The son of Sirach says "Call no man happy before his death, for by how he ends, a man is known." Wow, can you explain?

GF: Perhaps this refers to the fact that we are only real when all that is false in us has died – a spiritual death that is either accepted willingly (on the part of the aspirant), or not at all.

DebbieE: A friend of mine goes to a church where she has been assisting partly by feeding and clothing the poor. They feel that this is a ministry they should be involved in, but she is questioning it because she can't continue and keep herself and her only son healthy. She wonders when it should end. She sees herself assisting in what she once thought was "loving her neighbor," but the handouts keep going out and none seem to be changing and weaning themselves from the handouts. She says that it is becoming a perpetual cycle. Can you add any understanding to this issue of assisting others?

GF: Our problems today are because of spiritual ignorance of ourselves, and (necessarily) of those around us. Any act done in ignorance to resolve a problem can only acerbate the problem, whereby the dependent become more so, and the "do-gooders" unconsciously contribute to both their destruction (of soul) as well as their own. "Physician heal thyself" . . . and then you will know what might be done to help others. Most of us "do" good because it is a lot easier than doing the inner work to discover where we are a part of the problem we want to "heal".

GF: Let me now give you my remaining notes on what we must see if we would let go and know the peace for which our innermost heart longs.

First, a few points from our opening comments concerning the secret forces at work within us that are sabotaging our potential to know personal peace as well as a global harmony. The following paragraph is the main Key Lesson from my earlier notes:

Until we realize that continually identifying with our own conflicting desires about how to win peace of mind is like using a cannon blast to light a candle, we will only remain at war within ourselves -- all the while blaming the world around us for its insensitive inability to grant us that imagined peace we so desperately seek!

We then touched on a few of these conflicting desires, and how they wreck the soul identified with them. For instance, that endless want for a special someone to always "be there" for us -- committed to our happiness -- even as we fear that this same person, now empowered with our trust, may turn on us and hurt us. We see that Love and fear are antithetical, as are bulldozers and flowers.

So we discovered that these kinds of worldly desires deliver us into the hands of unseen opposing forces -- a condition where the peace of mind we had planned for not only fails to appear, but whose remnants create still new forms of conflict along with their would-be rescuing desires. The truth is self-evident:

One request after another, we ask for what we believe will bring us some measure of peace, only to find ourselves either in pain over what did not materialize, or in fear of losing what we fought to gain. And surely we have seen that certain of our longings please only one small part of us while punishing the rest, like overeating or indulging ourselves with destructive addictions.

It is of little doubt that most of us have tried, in any number of ways, to let go of these deceptive and disturbing desires only to find ourselves overpowered by their overwhelming gravity. And who hasn't thought they have let go of one problem only to find they have picked up another by mistake! Which brings us to this next important spiritual truth:

We do not have to choose which, or any, of these conflicting desires to let go of; it makes no difference. What we must now see is that whether it is wanting to be approved, acknowledged, or to feel oneself secure in another's love -- all such desires are false in that they have no power to grant us the peace they promise.

We must see that these desires are liars, even though their fires feel real enough. They do not belong to us, even though they are with us everywhere we go. I can almost hear you asking, "How can this be true?" Here is the startling answer. They are not our desires. They do not originate with us, and the will they impose upon us (to fulfill their longings) is not our own.

"Then whose desires are they, if not my own?" They belong to a world that has lost the means to know peace as was always intended, as it is given (to us) to live within. They are the contorted fragments of answers to heartaches that didn't work in their time, and that were passed along from one generation to the next until they have become so inculcated in us we see them as our own.

All such desires are false answers to equally false aches born out of ignorance of our authentic nature. They belong to a self that has been programmed to search for a sense of success carefully outlined and defined by the values of a world lost to the influences of the Higher Life.

And whoever wins this world loses his way because he unknowingly answers the call of a socially contrived will: a nature that needs its "tomorrows" in order to feel alive today. This sense of self has no existence apart from the future it imagines in which it will be whole at last. Now to these thoughts we must add one more all-important truth:

This unconscious "will of the world" that is at work within us, that always seeks its peace in a time to come, lives in opposition to a will greater than its own. Our careful study of this last insight is pivotal in our search for true peace.

If this will of the world within us -- with all of its conflicting desires -- is the one true governing power that we have come to accept it as being, and it alone is responsible for one's providence in life, then there could never arise any conflict between what one wishes for and the arrival of that sought-after state of self-peace. To the contrary, this is not how reality works.

The fact that a greater will exists is revealed to us every day, only we are unable to see it. The evidence of it rests in the very conflict we experience as we yield ourselves to the longings of this lesser will through the pull of the world within us. We could not know the lesser without the unseen presence of the greater that serves to reveal it, just as a shadow proves that a light is nearby.

And our pain in this life because of our misunderstanding of this order of reality is not a "punishment" by the greater of these wills, far from it; we are being invited to give ourselves, to surrender our self, to this greater will so that we may realize that within it already dwells the peace we seek.

Which brings us to this question: Given our present situation, saturated as we are with these worldly desires and blinded to them by their promises of better days to come, where do we find the will, the spiritual strength, to let go of them and give ourselves over to something Higher? Here is the surprising answer:

Learning to let go of the worldly will now active within us is not an act of power, but comes naturally on the heels of seeing where it is that we have been deceived into giving away our divine right to be at peace. It is this Higher Self-Wisdom that empowers us to leave our former self behind, that grants us peace, much as spring clouds bring gentle rains to wash everything clean.

One last thought and we will have the knowledge we need to know true peace. There can never be real peace in any world wherever opposing wills contest what the nature of that peace will be. And if this is true with two people at war over "how" or "what" peace is to be won, how much more so is it true when it comes to the conflicted will of this world as it opposes the peace of God?

To see the truth of these ideas and to marry them with our own experience is a conscious act of peace. God's will is being expressed in every new moment, and is secretly the heart and soul of each moment now being newly expressed. We need only be aware of ourselves in the moment to know the truth of this and then to allow this Light to teach us about the peace that passes all understanding.

Following are what may be called the "The Three A's of the Peaceful Life." Welcome them as special work reminders to let God's will be as your own. If you will take these new intentions and inner attitudes with you into your day, then you will soon realize what it means to let go and know peace.

Work to trust in the Goodness of God's moment, so that instead of trying to dig into it with a psychological pick-ax -- hoping to extract something from it that you think you must have to be happy -- allow the moment to give you what you need. Your key intention here is to "allow" God's will.

Work to watch the whole moment as it unfolds, so that instead of focusing only on what you want to see -- a self-limiting perception that separates you from all that the moment might have to show you -- agree to see everything the moment reveals about you and your present life. Your key action here is to "agree" with God's will.

Work to welcome whatever the moment brings to you, so that instead of resisting its natural seasons for fear of the passing of spring or the onset of a long winter's night -- accept the moment and let it live and die as it would. The key intention here is to "accept" God's will as your own.

GF: Welcome to our chat tonight, and Happy New Year to the Friends of Truth. Yes, the promise of another New Year is here, and this hopeful idea brings us right to these questions: What must one do if one truly intends to make a new beginning? What is our part in fulfilling this promise of Newness latent but hidden in ourselves?

We ask these questions in the spirit of the Newness that we hope for because life has shown us, again and again, that we know not their true answers. So tonight our task is to explore these important questions.

We begin with a short story. It illustrates two spiritual principles we will need to understand with regards to our wish to realize the Ever New Life. Picture in your mind a large mining operation, and just outside the opening to the mine, lined up for quite a ways in front of the paymaster's table, are a number of people waiting in line to collect their bi-monthly paychecks.

Somewhere in the middle of this line stands a man dreaming of the dollars about to come into his hands. As he waits, he envisions all the things he will be able to buy with this money, and the imagined treasures and pleasures soon to be his make waiting in line almost too much to bear. At last his turn arrives. He steps up and holds out his hand. But what's this?

As he extends his hand for the check he believes due to him, the paymaster checks his log, looks up at him, smiles, and says softly so as not to offend: "Excuse me sir, perhaps you have forgotten. This line is only for people who have worked these last two weeks, which you did not. Surely you don't expect to be paid for something you haven't done, do you?"

In case the lesson in this short story has missed the mark, let me draw it out for you: We all tell ourselves that we want a new life; we spend hours dreaming of the day when we are freed from self-limitations or otherwise self-compromising behaviors. In our minds we see ourselves walking away from destructive relationships with others, or from habitual negative thoughts and feelings. And this is the problem. We talk to ourselves about the "fresh start"; we plan the path to be taken when things are right; we conspire with others and encourage one another to begin again, to just let go of what "was". . . but that's it. We talk but don't walk! We plan but don't act. We dream but never awaken to the fact that the New Beginning we long for is Now or never. There is no such thing as "tomorrow" for anyone who really has it in his or her heart to start over with life. I am not asking you to agree or disagree with this spiritual truth; my only wish is for you to see the fact of it, and perhaps this next insight will add just the light needed to make this realization.

The only place where we can hope to make a genuine fresh start in life must be made in that one "place" where life itself is New all the "time." But before we discuss "where" this fountain of Fresh Starts is found, we must grasp a critical idea, as challenging as it may be. Your willingness to closely consider the following truth is vital to fulfilling your wish for a New Life.

The true place of all new beginnings, the only one where it is possible for us to begin our life over anew is, in reality, neither a "place" nor a "time." As confusing as this sounds at first, personal experience confirms it: as we are now, we search through people and places for a new start, but we are always returned to an incomplete end, having to set out again.

The truth is that this "place" or "time" we are looking for -- in which to make our new beginning -- cannot be found in space and time. What is New is not physical, temporal, or otherwise conditional at all. Such longed-after places are illusionary creations of one's own earth-bound desires trying to douse their own fires. And this is just the point: These longings for a fresh start drive us, but cannot deliver us to where a New Life begins. With this fact in mind, let me anticipate your question which I will answer as best it can be explained: The truly New Life -- through which we are empowered to begin our life all over -- is a Spirit. It is a living and eternal Light unfolding unendingly within each of us.

For the time being we will refer to this never-ending, always-beginning state of our own Higher but hidden Self with a word familiar to all of us: this "place and time" of spiritual Newness within us is what is commonly referred to as being -- "Now" --.

Let me help you realize what is being revealed, as just a little effort on our part will go a long way to prove the point being made: The only "time" one can truly start his or her life all over must be from within a life that is no longer bound up in "time." A quick example will get us past this sometimes confusing idea about being a captive of "time."

If one tries to make a new beginning, motivated by an attempt to no longer be where (or what) he or she once was, this person does start out, but not from what is New. On the contrary, this person begins his search, and then reaches his conclusions as to what he must come to possess to affect this newness, from within the confines of what has been his own past experience.

In other words, he sets out to start a new life for himself from a place within himself already known and rejected! Can you now begin to see the implications of making such a mistake (as it concerns knowing the correct "starting" place for making a new beginning)? A few more insights and the higher understanding needed to succeed will be ours.

Under such conditions as these, this person described cannot start anything over except the very life he hopes to escape! He begins his journey in the wrong place because he has yet to realize that the content of his "new" future to come, however sweetly dreamed, is secretly an unconscious extension of his own unwanted past.

Unseen, but nevertheless active in his psychology, this man carries within him a virtual string of "nots" by which he binds himself to his old life! And if he would be free to start life over, he must (as must we) understand this spiritual truth: what we resist, persists -- and this includes our own past!

No one can come upon what is truly New while walking the path of resistance to anything. Which means that the New Life we seek cannot be born through a blind rejection of who we have been. If we can see the truth in this, then we know we must not only discover the root of this resistant self in us, but we must do the work of learning how to "pull" this earth-bound nature out of us.

Before the end of tonight's chat, I will offer some additional special insight into what is required of us if we would make a fresh new start of our lives.

What would you like to talk about tonight? Let's see what we can learn together.

BobMac: I wish I could change, and help my children to live the right way in this new year. How do I make this desire enduring?

GF: Intend it to be just that. Accept nothing less. Make no excuses for yourself and blame no one for any negative states that compromise you. Do these things, and your wish to change will grow into the fact of it.

Randy: In your opinion, how useless are resolutions commonly made at this time of year? Are we simply weighing our "selves" down with meaningless thoughts of acquisitions, or is it just a game we humans play?

GF: Virtually all resolutions are meaningless for the simple reason that no intention of ours is any better (or stronger) than our ability to remember it. And as we are rarely the same person (inwardly) from moment to moment, we can hardly remember our wish, let alone find the will to enact it.

Benny: Can you elaborate a bit more on the idea of this "fire" that some of us are missing? The only spiritual fire I know is when I detect something is wrong with my life, and I have to go fix it. Even then it's a struggle to break out of my rut. Is there a spiritual fire we can cultivate that will empower our actions where "motivation" fails?

GF: Yes, there is in all of us a spiritual fire that can be awakened and nourished with proper inner work and the grace of God. The fire you speak of concerning "fixing" things is not the fire I speak of, but a lower version of it called personal desire. The real spiritual fire is not personal in nature and requires only a person's willingness to become conscious of its presence for it to fulfill its higher purpose in that same person.

MobilMan: Sometimes I find that I am unable to find this great peace where nothing bothers me at all. I have found (for myself) that I am able to stay there for periods of hours and then I always end up back in my "normal state." Is this peace that I find from time to time something that can be found and stayed in?

GF: In the long run, all such questions concerning a "greater peace" that comes upon us can only be answered by the Life that grants us this grace. Having said that, the physical body itself has to be "prepared" to be able to sustain these higher energies that constitute the wholeness we experience in ourselves and that we call peace. Keep working. Your task is to request this Light. It's responsibility is the rest.

mobilman: Our peace is not our own… it is given to us by the Giver or Prince of Peace?

GF: Yes, it is so.

alex: I have experienced love towards the opposite sex where my attention is continually on them whether they are present or not. Wouldn't I possess the capacity to experience God in the same way? I find the same resonance doesn't vibrate inside me. It doesn't happen as easily and is not as identifiable or prevalent as it is in external relationships.

GF: First, the answer is yes, one can and is created to be drawn to the life of God in very much the same way as one's inability to stop thinking about someone they love. This celestial love affair requires development on our part, within us, in order that the Light that is the expression of this love "feels" that we more and more have made room for it in our heart. This is a part of each one's work, to not only invite this higher Love, but to prepare a place for its dwelling within one.

ADB: I recently went through a period of serious and unrelenting grief/sadness after realizing the utter emptiness of being attached to activities that I've been heavily identified with for many years (like food/non-needful eating). I'm seeing how this dark nature rules other parts (most) of my life as well and this is rather disconcerting. Is part of this that "dark night of the soul" you sometimes refer to? Is this a good or necessary thing to be occurring in me?

GF: This is not the true dark night of the soul, but it is a certain dark night that one goes through as he awakens to the presently unconscious but active content of his soul. Don't fear this. Don't dwell on it. See it and step past it. What you are going through is natural and necessary for the further development of the Light within you.

ADB: Is there any way (I find it hard to believe I'm saying this) that I can "bring it on" so as to facilitate what I'm going through? Or do I just let it all flow (like I have a choice)?

GF: Our willingness to put Truth first sets into motion everything that we can “do” to help God help us go through what we must.

jilly: When there is no observer translating the past, do those thoughts and feelings still pass through you? And if the observer is not translating the past, is this the higher life?

GF: These thoughts and feelings exist independent of the observer in that they are entities having become somewhat self-conscious through a person's unconscious life. They fade, and with them their influence, as one continues in his effort to stay awake. The higher life, a life in the Light, may be said to appear in proportion to the disappearance of one's identification with said thoughts and feelings.

KautiousKat: After a night of drinking during a new year celebration party, I became extremely negative and felt like almost everything in my life was hopeless. Even my loved ones and my progress in this work seemed meaningless to my life and what I am here for. I know this was bad (and I rarely drink). Please tell me what happened or why I saw nothing in the important things in my life… I have never really experienced such powerful negativity before.

GF: Any time that any of us consent to a deliberate contamination of ourselves, either through substance, or the presence of toxic people, we literally "open" ourselves to the onset of certain negative forces that are never further away than the tip of our nose, spiritually speaking. Drop this now. It is negativity itself that wants you to carry this over. Let it shock you, but shock you awake.

jilly: Why do we think it helps us to "feel bad" in weak moments?

GF: Feeling bad about ourselves is secret egotism that merely is an opposite to the condition that we tell ourselves we feel bad about. Simply put, such negative self-interest supplies us with what seems to be a positive sense of ourselves.

jilly: As we begin to learn about these principles and understand their importance in our lives, why do we want to keep dreaming? Lack of understanding?

GF: Yes, lack of understanding, but specifically it is the failure to understand that within us dwells a lower nature whose only reality is a construct of its own dreams. It is not "I" that dreams, but this nature whose experience of the past must replay itself to create its own present moment.

Clem: When doing something that I'm interested in, I don't get tired. I don't even like to stop to eat, despite being hungry. I wish I was as passionate about facing fears, self-denial, and submission to Truth. How can I become more fascinated with the Light?

GF: Good question. It could be said that this happens in two ways. First, the Light itself stirs in a man and he is drawn like a moth to a flame. Second, and more common, a man awakens to find himself in a blackness he always attributed to the world, but realizes its his own darkness. Then, if he won't fall into that darkness, the light that showed him himself calls him home.

ADB: Are the divorce rates so high because none of us know what true love is? I sense that the feelings I had for my wife at the beginning of our relationship are not the true feelings that a relationship should be started out on. This seems clearer, especially after reading some of your and Mr. Howard's writings. Comments please?

GF: First, divorce rates are so high because people are so afraid that they cling to one another under any pretense at the drop of a hat. When the sensation of fear passes, or the thrill of the intimate affair finally fades, these people are left wondering how they got into what they did. Obviously, while we call some of this activity love, it is not. Awakened love in a human being is the gift of that person having understood in himself all that is not love. This knowledge of himself is the knowledge of all others around him. From this understanding comes humility, from humility compassion, and in compassion, the birth of love.

BARRY: From the past I have gotten the impression from you that all anger 100% of the time is useless to identify with. Wouldn't the middle way be a better approach?

GF: Is a little fire better to hold in your hand than a big fire?

BARRY: If all anger is useless to identify with, what was the purpose of the story where Jesus got angry and overturned the tables in the church?

GF: The historical story of Christ in the temple is not the interior meaning at all of what is an actual inner life experience that each along the Path must go through. A sleeping man cannot comprehend what a conscious man does, especially "how" he does it for the purposes that serve that man's need.

BARRY: Should one never take action based on fear? Wouldn't that action always be based on shaky ground?

GF: Better to be conscious and awake on "shaky ground" than to be asleep and fearful on dark ground created by resistance to one's fear. The man awake to the ground he traverses, eventually passes over that ground. The man in dreamland remains the fearful dreamer.

BARRY: Would you have any other advice to give me about being in fear of others' judgments other than not to identify with the emotional challenge of this? For example, I am going bald and so I wear a hat and avoid dinners where I might have to take my hat off.

GF: The more we can understand our fears, their true basis in us, the more fearless we act in their face. It is not what others think of you that frightens you. It is always your own thoughts that are the source of his terror and torment. See this truth as deeply as you can, and then watch how you begin to walk into life with a new courage.

SHADY: If what we resist persists, then are we creating the monster"? If we don't resist what we know is fear (or bad, or whatever you want to call it), then what do we do?

GF: We have within us a nature that is perfectly empowered to “see” the truth of things. All psychological fears are self-produced, and as such, false in reality. When the false is seen as being that, what is there to “do?”

looneykin: Whenever I try some endeavor in my life, I find myself many times failing in the things I try to accomplish. Is this a pursuit of the "me" mind, or a question of something having gone wrong? What do I do about?

GF: All depends upon what it is one attempts to do, particularly given that the whole idea of being a failure at something is always proportionate to the idea one had of the sense of self they would derive from being a "success." Things that we strive for that have our sense of self vested in them are doomed to fail at the moment we set out for them. Try to see this truth.

looneykin: How does one succeed?

GF: To learn the real nature of success in this life, one must first awaken to understand the purpose of this life. Once this is known, success follows naturally, as fruits do their flowers.

SHADY: How do we get that earthly bound nature all the way out of us when there are all the practicalities to deal with?

GF: There is no contradiction whatsoever between what we need to do as beings on this earth and what is asked of us to awaken to real life. One must learn to discern the difference between what is needful versus desire-borne. What is needful is always simple. All things desire-borne are as complex as the conflict they produce.

anne: I am working on finding my true self. Judging others is my huge button -- all the time I have a comment on their looks, job, what they think, how they feel, etc. I am aware of it though, and I stop the thought. It is constant. What does this mean?

GF: To one degree or another, all still-sleeping human beings mechanically judge one another for the instantaneous sense of self-superiority that such reactions produce. You must grow weary of letting yourself be defined by negative distinctions set up between yourself and others. Catch this more and more in yourself, and "taste" how badly it does taste to you. Soon you won't want this kind of food anymore.

Rael: It's been three years since I discovered your website (work), ten since I redoubled my examination of the inner life, and thirty since I initially experienced the pearl of great price and gave away all my physical possessions and set out to lose the mental. Yet I am as wretched today as ever. Is it possible that some people are "missing" some vital element for knowing the Truth?

GF: There is a flower that I know of that blooms somewhere in some deep remote desert, once only every twenty years. The conditions have to be right for this to occur. God never calls a man to him and then locks the door when the man knocks. Like the seed in the desert, stay at this door within yourself and knock, knock, knock, knock. Come visit here to the Foundation when you can.

ADB: I know I need to be a good householder for my family, but I still would like a down-to-earth (for my sake) answer on how to continue with the Inner Work and yet build a business as an income source. I provide for my family now, but would like to have a home business so that I am home more, yet this business stuff all seems based so antithetical to the Real Inner Work. Help/insights please?

GF: Forgive me for saying so (or not), but what you have said is just an excuse. We each do, in each moment, what we value. There is no exception to this truth. Why can't a man be at work and remember his God when he's writing his report? Why can't a woman be preparing a meal and giving thanks to God for her life while she cooks? We do what we love. So, we must change what we love. Then our life changes, and not before.

KautiousKat: Could you please recommend some good writings/teachings on internal energy? I live in a remote place where nobody offers such experience, and the internet is filled with opinionated garbage on the matter. I have had this interest for years and now realize I should take it more seriously in order to understand more about our worlds. I need guidance.

GF: Start with the audio album "Secrets of Cleansing the Heart Mind and Soul." It's right on this website, and as always, if you don't find it sheds welcome light into your life and on your search, you may return it for a full refund.

Diojeneez: Socrates said the wise man knows that he knows nothing. If that's true, then are all esoteric truths entirely based on faith?

GF: No, that's not true. What Socrates means is that the wise man knows that the wisdom that runs through his veins belongs not to him, and therefore cannot be called something of his.

jilly: Is seeing what's going on inside of you and outside of you (in the physical world) the present moment? If it is, is this where real change occurs?

GF: Yes, that's actually it. The simultaneous and whole awareness of self, as best one can be awake to the whole of oneself, is what places the content of ourselves within the light of ourselves. It is this Light that changes us.

James1: When I bring myself to the present moment, the experience is so brief. I slip off into conversations, daydreams, etc., and by the time I realize it, so much time has passed. This occurs the more often I try to study. The course I'm taking is very difficult and long. It's difficult to complete a thought. Help. I've been like this since adolescence.

GF: There are certain exercises that one can do if one is serious in wishing to develop their attention. One such exercise is in my book, The Lost Secrets of Prayer, and it has to do with a person doing the interior work with all three of his or her centers. The loss of attention is always by one center being dominated by another, or the onset of a desire in one or the other. Read the section on conscious prayer. It should help you.

Jamesone: Could you please explain the three centers you just referred to?

GF: In this instance I was referring (only) to emotional, intellectual, and an aspect where one’s will manifests (itself).

akaia: I find that I can and do feel a Grace sometimes, but I am mostly in despair. I find our human condition and what we do to each other so disheartening, I can hardly stand being here. I also pick up on other people's energy. This is usually their pain, and it is so overwhelming. Any suggestions on a way to feel alive again?

GF: All forms of despair, regardless of what seems to be their cause, are a secret form of false life. What you have said about yourself I am sure is true, and I know is true about the world we live in. But allowing one's consciousness to become a captive of the conflict that enters one's awareness is a part of the darkness this same self condemns. Give this torment up and into you will return the life and grace you remember.

akaia: How do I give up this torment when I don't recognize it as such? There are some days that I can hardly function, then I hear the news and realize something has happened in the world and the Earth herself is in pain (and I have felt it).

GF: If your state described is what you allege, then there is nothing to be done other than surrender yourself to the process of this (unfolding compassion) and allow it to work its way upon your soul. Endure it. There are reasons for this kind of sensitivity, and God will reveal them in His time.

RobF: Is there a point of diminishing returns (say after 35 to 40 minutes) when doing Exercise #11 (Go Quiet) in your Key of Kings book? I could go longer if you recommend it, but my thoughts are continually wandering off for minutes at a time before I realize what has happened and I come back to observing my thoughts. I like to fit prayer into these sessions as well, so I am wondering how much time to allocate to each.

GF: Certain parts of us can run out of necessary force to produce productive results. Having said this, I'll add though that, seeing how you are wandering off the longer you work at the exercise of being quiet and attentive to yourself, it sounds to me like the exercise is working. We want to catch our own states as they slip in and out of us. What we do to this end is always valuable for us.

RobF: You espouse complete physical relaxation in this "Go Quiet" exercise. Do you advocate the same physical relaxation exercise while in prayer mode?

GF: Prayer as an active work of the mind and heart that may require states of attention that prohibit relaxation as described. However, as one’s prayers flower, then comes a (highly) relaxed state of self that follows naturally.

looneykin: What makes us seek a higher self?

GF: It has always been said that the love that we seek in a higher life is the same love set into us that puts us on the Path to find this Lover.

zbert: How do we come to a point in our lives where we are not driven by success, money, etc.? I have enjoyed great financial success, but feel like I have given up part of my soul for this success.

GF: We are not driven in this life by success or money, but by the desire we have to become someone real through these things. As such, all pursuits are a secret punishment of the soul that pursues these impossible opposites. Our awakening to this presently unconscious pain is what naturally changes our preference as to a path in this life.

KautiousKat: What would you recommend to someone who finds no others around them that want the truth? I feel I have used these conditions to learn, grow, etc., but now feel this is old and elementary and wish to be with other like-minded truth seekers. I am liking nothing else but truth, more everyday. Is it normal to be "stranded" in this way, or will I eventually find others with whom I can grow?

GF: The company of other individuals who love the Truth is something that if one can have, is well worth all such costs. Have you ever considered coming out to visit the Foundation here in southern Oregon and attending some of the talks for awhile? Just a thought.

alex: I was struck with your comment (relating to growing in the light) "where a person walks into a meeting at work and everyone gets up and leaves." In all humility, there have been days where I am at work, feeling fine within myself, but the aggressive negativity directed towards me from so many individuals in one day is staggering and leaves me wondering what is going on.

GF: Learn what it means to disappear to yourself, and then the activities or appearances of others toward you will be as a rain storm to the sky it falls through. This disappearing act of self can be done, in fact it is what this Work leads us to wherein at last we are free from negative influences, regardless of their source.

alex: Can you comment on what Christ meant by "agree with your adversary quickly lest they deliver you up"? Was it to mean that no matter what you say to your adversary, they are just not going to get it?

GF: This passage has a number of meanings. One of them, and a more esoteric one, is that the part of us that would argue with another must be at the same low level of his adversary. What we resist in ourselves not only persists, but actually grows in us, therefore we are delivered "up" into the negativity we would fight with.

Diojeneez: Vernon Howard said "God doesn't think about you! There is no self to think about!" What exactly does that mean??

GF: God is love. True love is without conditions or a center. All are creations of God's love. Therefore, there is no one apart from this love or its center. Therefore there is no separate self for God to consider.

MOS: I've been moved to a different kind of position at work. I am trying to move to the unknown, but my thoughts keep telling me I should be doing what I've been doing in my past. It makes me get uptight about where I am, and I find myself getting lost in thought about where I am and where I should be. How can I put these thoughts behind me?

GF: Learn as best you can what it means to deal with what is in your power and refuse to participate in what is not. It is in your power to see the destructive quality in such self-considerations as you've described. It is not in your power to change your physical position upon which these negative states are feeding. Stop feeding the animals and then it won't matter where you are in the zoo.

Ryan: Could you interpret this passage for me? "Your purpose in life should be to live a quiet life, working with your hands, not needing others -- therefore they will respect you and follow you."

GF: Our purpose in life is to awaken to, and fulfill within ourselves, God's love (for us). This love makes a person quiet, simple, and innocent. When a person has such humility born of heaven's grace, others naturally are attracted to his wisdom and the path that he walks.

Clem: Is humility the awareness that, of myself, I have and am... nothing?

GF: Precisely. It is also the gradual realization that in spite of this, God -- the Living Light -- turns around and gives you everything.

hudnut: I have recently had my wallet stolen from me and I have no idea who did it, but regardless, I decided to forgive the individual (and I recognize that doesn't mean I condone what he has done). But my heart still sinks when I see credit card statements come through the mail. How do I lose the victim mentality this seems to produce?

GF: First, on a practical level, your credit card company (having been alerted to the theft) should cover fraudulent charges. Check into this. Once this is done, then the only pain that you could experience at seeing these statements is born out of some form of negative imagination that moves through you, producing some pain over what you're powerless to change. One loses the victim mentality by losing interest in the same.

january: I would like to have a child, but my husband does not. How can I lose the desire for a child? Will I be able to live without resentment?

GF: I don't think that one can lose the desire for a child if the longing for motherhood is a True one. Having said this, why must you lose this desire simply because present conditions don't permit it? A desire can live in us without resentment towards whatever prohibits its fulfillment. Desires in themselves are not destructive, it is the sense of self we derive from them that destroys all forms of love.

Ryan: Another great verse from the Bible that can be interpreted is: "I assure you, even if you had faith as small as a mustard seed you could say to this mountain, "Move from here to there,' and it would move. Nothing would be impossible."

GF: This passage relates to the fact that as we are made in the image of God, each of us is in fact a model of the universe. There is no power not available to the mind that has entered into relationship with the power that moves the universe.

DebbiE: You have said that Christ did not come to die for our sins, and that he was an historical figure. He was obviously an enlightened one, but was he put to death because of others' fear of the Truth? My husband feels that those who don't believe he came to save us from our sins by dying are not Christians. I don't know how to respond to this except I know it's not Truth.

GF: Christ was an historical figure, there is no doubt of this. But Christ is also an eternal being whose life and light is as present now as it was before his appearance 2000 years ago. It is not the man who saves the man from anything, let alone his or her sins. It is the light of Christ that dispels the elemental darkness in the undeveloped soul that is the source of that soul's "sins." He is saved by the Light from himself.

puppy: Is there a place of rest on this journey? It seems that my life gets calm and sweet, and then a huge wave of problems hits me broadside as soon as I think everything is OK. I am currently dealing with major money problems and all the anxiety that comes with that. Is this because I still have not seen or done what I need to do? I get discouraged and weary and sometimes feel so very alone. Help!

GF: Our experience of this journey is not unlike the cycles of rising and setting sun until we realize that, seen or not, the Light is always with us, guiding us if we will follow.

bhodges: What can I do to help me stay in the now? My mind is constantly moving from the past to the present. I would love to spend more time in the now.

GF: Before we can hope to be present to ourselves in the now, we must discover what takes us out of the moment. Get my book Designing Your Destiny and in it you will find not just the insights you seek, but practical exercises to help you achieve your aims.

Randy: Please help me understand how being in the present moment leads to a disappearance of self and where the opposites fit in. It seems the more I do the work, the less I understand. Is that good?

GF: Time (for us) is the distance between what we imagine we are and what we hope to become -- the opposites. As we realize that no such self exists apart from this act of imagination (and the sensations produced by these desires), we (false sense of self) disappear.

jfox: You write about awakening and not identifying with negative thoughts, emotions, images, etc. Should we not identify with positive thoughts as well?

GF: All forms of identifying with thoughts are limitations and ultimately a source of fear.

Diojeneez: I heard a psychologist say that we produce about fifty thousand thoughts in a single day, and that the majority are negative or habitual. Is this true? It sounds exaggerated. I only catch and twenty of them! So if it is true, then can I reach the point where I see all fifty thousand thoughts?

GF: Most thoughts are not our productions; as for the rest, we need only stay awake as best possible for us, and welcome the light by which we see what it reveals in us. Illumination appears by degrees we cannot measure.

DebbiE: "Foregoing ourselves leads us to finding our True Selves"… I have been considering going to a health spa for I have symptoms that I think could be harmful. Is it better to just stay home and immerse myself in this Work? I'll get the answers I need by doing that?

GF: We must each learn to listen to our own intuition about such things.

Clemagain: As an exercise, I decide to scratch my face and know that the resulting sensation is given to me. Was the initial impulse to scratch my face (as an exercise) given to me as well?

GF: We must not get caught in the trap of thinking about ourselves like this. Such considerations serve nothing but a neurotic self that seeks what it can never find: confirmation of itself.

anne: What is the esoteric answer to the career that I want and am working toward, and the dismal job that I have to endure to make ends meet? I am working on my inner self, and people are reacting positively toward me, but my chosen career is not advancing. Is a career you love and want a desire and not a need?

GF: It may or may not be; each of us must find our way through these things, and work patiently to realize the truth about ourselves and our circumstances. What we love, we will be united with. What we desire will always elude us, even should we win the object desired.

Diojeneez: How does one speak directly to God, as if conversing with a friend (even in the esoteric meaning speaking to God), and be certain that one is indeed speaking to Him?

GF: God doesn’t care the manner in which we attempt to commune, only that we do as best we can. The Divine will direct us from that point.

BobMac: Does it really not matter how bad outer conditions might be?

GF: For the man or woman who loves truth, who wants a God-centered life more than anything else, all things are in his favor! Of this be assured.

GF: Our time together has nearly run its course, so now it's time to give you my remaining notes on what we must do if we wish to make a true fresh start in our life. Here is a brief summary of the material we covered at the outset.

First we looked over certain ideas concerning what we found to be false "places" and "times" in our lives where one commonly searches for a new beginning. Some discoveries later we reached a necessary conclusion: The true "place" where our lives start fresh, wherein we realize a New Life, is not located on any compass or setting of a clock; it is found only within a (new) Spirit.

We then gave a familiar name to this never-ending, always-beginning spiritual state, a word known to all of us: We called this "place and time" of Newness the -- "Now" --. And then we left off with the idea that if we wish to start life all over, our one intention must be -- from wherever we are in life at present -- to consciously realize this Evergreen Moment as our own.

This "Now" spoken of here is more than just an idea about a perfectly present and incorruptible moment. The Now I attempt to describe with these words is actually a conscious Presence. This perpetual Nature of Newness is without beginning or end, and lives by its own Light. Seen or not, this Light is indwelling, and to be in this "Now" is to be one with its Newness.

Which brings us to this idea: Now, the New, does not begin in the fading fires of the "old"; it is not a continuation of time or creature, but the secret ground of their lives. It is important to grasp that the Spirit of Newness does not carry itself forward, but begins each moment new. And we must gain this understanding of its nature if we wish its Life to be our own.

Next we must come to see that this newness of "Now" is one and the same with our awareness of its presence within us. Its moment of Being is our own, and its Life refreshes ours. We dwell within its domain even though this eternal Newness sustains us. This being said, we are ready to discuss what is required of us if we wish a relationship with this Spirit of True Renewal.

First, we need to touch upon a spiritual truism: That which is truly New "begins" only after the "end" (of something) is reached. This idea calls to mind the myth of the Phoenix resurrected out of the ashes, meaning what is authentically New is never a continuation of what "was." Now, if we apply this insight to our everyday life, it looks like this: We cannot "plan" a fresh start in life.

We must not push this idea away just because it doesn't fit in with our most recent set of plans! We must do something new instead: Rather than allowing ourselves to be used by habitual low-level reactions, let us choose to respond with our God-given ability for higher reasoning. So let's think through this last insight and willingly reach its logical conclusion.

How can we have a "plan" for becoming what we hope will make us new that doesn't have its roots in some former plan of ours, one in which we did not succeed else we would not be struggling to start over yet again? And if we bring our past into the Now, into this our present moment, then this moment in which we live becomes the past again, in spite of what we call it.

Spiritually speaking, the cost of starting over is not what we pay to achieve some desire of ours, but is in our willingness to let go of -- to dare to live without -- any desire we may have whose promise of fulfillment drives us to search for it in another tomorrow. The fresh start of a New Life appears only as our "old" life disappears -- only as we willingly "die" to whom we have been.

There are any number of ways to state this timeless truth, but the action required remains unchanged: If we wish to start our lives over new, the spiritual price (of admission) is that we agree to no longer carry over our thoughts about ourselves from moment to moment.

To this end, and to help us do what is needed to free ourselves, we must see that while our habit of revisiting and then reliving past mental and emotional states may lend us welcome and familiar sensations, this same "loan" costs us our chance to know the Now, to be New.

Christ often spoke of this exact cost, and how it is that "taking thought for the morrow" is powerless to increase our potential for a new start. He knew, as we must discover within ourselves, that our present sense of life is a derivative experience of an unregenerate self whose time-bound nature fears the New because it cannot live in the realm of this Spiritual Now.

However, these truths tell only half the story. Christ, as well as all the Great Wise Ones through the ages, also spoke of another cost. But this one we should all agree to pay, that is if we hope to make our home within the Timeless. Here we learn of the opportunity to exchange our "old" life for a New one if we will work at a certain interior task from moment to moment

We must dare to step out of our past -- and into the Now -- every time we can catch ourselves about to be carried off by some common self-consideration. This means we watch, catch, and then drop our thoughts as they appear within our awareness, instead of picking each one up and holding it to our ear like a seashell in the hopes of catching the sweet sound of (our) self again.

This deliberate work of walking away from one's past is a prerequisite for any true fresh start in life. But the false self will not sit quietly by as we work to break its hold on us. It may profess otherwise, but this dark nature loathes the Now because it is unable to enter into its Newness. After all, how can it? Might as well try to take a shadow into the sun's corona!

This thought-driven desire machine only knows itself by calling up and then considering its own images of past experiences. But in the Now there are no well-worn images of life -- only the Spirit of New Life Itself!

As we work to be in the Now, and from our New understanding strive to leave the old thought-self behind us, it will cry out something like this: "But you can't live without me! Who will watch out for you and see to your well-being if not me?" And though it is necessary you learn to craft your own answer to this trickster nature who is the enemy of Newness, here is one response worth remembering:

Let the following words be your heart's answer. Send it out from your silently seeing mind to this deceptive foe of all fresh starts in life: "What I need, you cannot give me. What I long to see, you cannot show me. And what I hope to be, you cannot make of me. This conversation has reached its end."

Then, just keep "walking" ahead, into the New and unknown Now. Remember that renewing your intention moment to moment is both the price of admission and your entrance. Keep the Light of this new understanding before you and all the shadows that would stand in the way of your new beginning must remain behind you. Let this Truth be your guide.

Our time has run out. Remember all that we have learned tonight. Do your inner work to live in conscious relationship with the ever new Now. Persist until you see that nothing in the universe can interfere with your wish to start life over because this wish comes to you from Reality itself.

GF: Welcome everyone. Before we begin tonight I want to discuss a very simple but invaluable idea. We are going to look into what it means to be a Friend of Truth. This kind of Friendship makes all things possible. Without it, a Real Life is impossible.

Before we tackle the idea of what it means to be a Friend of Truth, let's do a bit of preliminary thinking toward the whole idea of "friendship." What we are about to discover is that being friendly to everything that wants to befriend us is not always in our best interests. But let's not get too far ahead of ourselves. We must begin at the beginning.

Can we recall in younger days a parental figure telling us that they did not want us spending time with a certain person or group of people? The idea behind their correction was that if we continued our current relationship with these people -- seen as being "bad" for us -- nothing good would come of it.

Most of our parents either did not, or could not, explain to us why they imposed these restrictions on our relationships. The truth is, apart from what was their general understanding that "a bad apple ruins the whole barrel," our folks did not have much more insight into such things. Mom and Dad just "knew" that trouble follows those who keep bad company. And usually they were right.

In fact, now their conclusions seem more than obvious: sharks do not swim with dolphins; coyotes don't keep rabbits as pets. Life instructs us: lambs lay down with lambs. It's clear that all creatures have their circle of "friends," and that outside of the wise tolerances these relationships will bear, we all tend to keep the company of what we are naturally comfortable having around us.

Of course, when it comes to relationships with others, who hasn't been attracted to certain types that we sensed may be harmful? Thankfully our intuition usually prevailed, and we were spared the punishment of painful indiscretion. But these kinds of relationships in life -- and the mistakes made through them -- are not limited to just people and our choices concerning their company.

The truth is that when it comes to our friends, we cannot expect from them anything better -- any qualities higher than -- the inner company we keep with our own thoughts and feelings. Simply stated, it is the content of our mind and heart that is not only attracted to certain kinds of people (and events), but that also serves as an attracting agent to those who want to be around us.

It's likely that most of us have never taken much time to think through how the nature of our thoughts and feelings directly determines the company we keep, but I assure you this is true. Speaking of which, here is another truth about our circle of friends that underscores the importance of keeping good inner company: The old adage goes, "we resemble those with whom we assemble."

Simply put, this means that our character changes according to the company we keep. In other words, never a moment passes in which we are not each being acted upon by whatever we are in relationship with in that same moment. The implications of this are vast, and to see the truth of them is to realize the need for a continuing vigilance, both outwardly and inwardly. Here is why:

Our life, our experience of living, is a ceaseless creation of the interaction of the infinite invisible forces active around and within us. In any given moment our consciousness is an expression of the sum of these invisible interior connections.

What this means to us is that the continual transformation (of self) is not just an idea. It is an eternal axis around which our life not only revolves, but through which our nature is ever-becoming -- for better or for worse -- more or less of what it is. The point is clear: What we become in this life is very much determined by the kind of "interior" company we keep.

Even if this idea of "inner" company is new to you, its reality becomes common sense once we learn to look in the right place. Within ourselves we live in perpetual relationship with our own thoughts and feelings. If it helps you to visualize this insight, think of these psychological forms and forces as your invisible circle of friends, for that is exactly what they are. Yet, they are more.

We know that all physical creations under the sun belong to certain orders of being. We also know that all these orders of being themselves stand in an order of being, and that they associate with one another according to their nature. Well, this same principle holds true when it comes to our own thoughts and feelings. These forces have their own families of a sort and we are their "home."

So now we add to the idea that we "resemble those with whom we assemble" the additional insight that "birds of a feather flock together" and we should be able to see why, down through the ages, those who have sought the Awakened Life have been called the Friends of Truth.

These wise men and women understood in their time, as we must now in our own, that the more moments one spends living in the company of the Truth, the more the Life of what is True courses through him. Its friendship converts him; by Law its company transforms him. He is made newly conscious by the entrance of a new inhabitant. His life has become a home for Truth.

Before we say good night this evening I will send along some special notes and suggested practices for how we can do the inner work of spending more and more time in the Good Company of Truth.

Now it's your turn to ask questions or make comments as they apply to your ongoing spiritual work. Please, let's all refrain from superficial philosophical speculation. The best questions, the ones that elicit the most beneficial response for all involved, are the ones that arise directly out of our own continuing inner work.

What do you feel like discussing tonight? What have you been working on within yourself, and how can we use this time together to make ourselves new, better, and deeper Friends of Truth? Let's get started with your questions and see what comes to us.

Bev: There is a certain comfort in having "old" friends around -- at 42 I have a couple that date back to grammar school. Isn't this the same with our thoughts and feelings? There is a certain "comfort" and false safety in recognizing them and knowing them -- and how they "know" us? What is familiar often seems better than what is unfamiliar.

GF: There is nothing "wrong" with having old friends, if indeed they are True friends. What is a True friend? Anyone who does not agree with our negative states, and who will not coddle us when we are in conflict with life. There's more on the nature of Higher Friendship at the end of the chat, so stick around for that.

Bev: In fact, it feels at times to be a "Friend of Truth" seems so lonely -- like there is no one else and nothing else that matters anymore, yet our entire lives are a construct around valuing other things and other people. Sometimes I feel such a sense of nothingness in trying to be a "Friend of Truth" and it isn't a very pleasant feeling!

GF: Yes, there is no question that being a "Friend of Truth" requires an order of receptivity on one's part that is unlike anything the world around us ever asks us for. You may be encouraged that the not-so-pleasant feelings visiting you now can only remain with you as long as you resist your condition. Being friends with Truth helps us to let go of any such resistance in favor of being in relationship with Reality, our True Friend.

KautiousKat: I have been paying attention to the fact that trouble follows those who keep bad company for some time now, and I can't help noticing other people's folly and how lost they are. I have noticed this in even young children. Certain ones seem to have nothing but hardships. Does this mean we are born with certain company, and if so, can we help ourselves out?

GF: We are always capable of changing our internal company. This is the one True choice we have as human beings, i.e. to determine the nature of what we are in relationship with moment-to-moment in ourselves. Anything that tells us we cannot change our condition, is itself the condition we have been unable to change. Seeing this changes everything, because it changes the company we keep.

Bev: Do these forces pull at even the youngest of children and, if so, how does a parent be a counter-balance to these forces? It seems that even my young children are so "mean" and angry and unhappy much of the time. Are we all attacked, beginning as infants, by these negative forces, or is most of it learned behavior (from us parents!)?

GF: These two forces of conflict go hand-in-hand, and one feeds the other. I think we will see with increasing evidence more and more ugly behavior from even younger children than we see now. In part, this is due to a certain kind of spiritual congestion that is overcoming this earth. The other part of it is due to ignorance on the part of those in the throws of this increasing constriction.

Bev: Wow… sobering for a parent to hear. So, how do I counter-act these forces such that my children are not part of this "spiritual congestion"? Sometimes it seems like it is all kind of hopeless hearing what a negative direction this world, and even the children in it, are headed in…

GF: Be as true to what you know is the Truth as you can. This act of will radiates and helps all in its influence.

namaste: I have been perplexed with decisions on relationships, in particular romantic relationships. Being aware that nothing external can affect my happiness, why would I choose one relationship over another? If you love someone for what they are and ignore what they are not (subjective) then you can love anyone. It seems nothing more than a choice. What criteria are healthy in making such a choice?

GF: I once knew a person who believed he was an apple. All day long he professed this. But when all was said and done, what he said he was and what he actually was were two different things. Saying that we know that nothing external can affect our happiness, and living from a state of awakedness that is our happiness, are two different things. Don't get caught in the mental trap. See what you feel, and then make from this discovery the best choice you can.

Gabe: Three weeks ago I broke up with a very beautiful young lady that I had a 16 month relationship with. I was hurt. She was very needy, unstable and toxic. She was my first love. Can I ever love someone as much, or even more than her?

GF: As difficult as this is to understand, and it applies to Namaste's question as well, the way that we change as human beings is through awareness of what we are, as opposed to thinking about ourselves and what others may or may not bring into our lives. Relationships are for the purpose of educating us about ourselves. If we can't be open and honest with ourselves in them, then they are for naught. Forget what's coming. Be attentive now.

ADB: Since money is such a false god to virtually the entire world, even to those of us on the Truth path, can you give a recorded talk specifically focusing just on this topic? If so, I'd be most interested in obtaining a copy of it.

GF: Sure. One never knows exactly what topic will be discussed at our ongoing meetings, but I will keep your wish in mind.

Cletus: When I leave this chatroom (and especially class at the Foundation), I seem to have a need for Truth that's not just intellectual, but EMOTIONAL as well. Yet it's only a matter of time before that one True part is once again just a TRACE of Conscience within this cacophony of sensations. How can I cultivate this "emotional awareness"?

GF: It begins with what you are starting to notice about yourself now. The True Path is a continual discovery of where one had mistaken something that he thought was right and light for what was untrue and an action of darkness. The emotional awareness you seek, seeks you as well. We must just continue to be in the right place inwardly to receive its influx. Stay the course.

Kraig: Breaking old and worn-out thought habits may take a lifetime to fully achieve. Is the key to doing so simply the conscious attention to our thoughts and the behaviors which flow from them?

GF: Essentially, yes. Of course one has to enter into all the various relationships that habits run through us in order to see their authentic interior ground. But you may be assured that the light of awareness eventually penetrates and dissolves and integrates all that has plagued us, turning it into that which is part of our perfection.

KautiousKat: I have what I strongly believe, without identifying, a no-brainer opportunity to do what I like and am also very good at without too much upfront expense. I have been self-employed before and know what mistakes NOT to make. The problem is I have no money to do this right. All my investments and workings have gone to nothing and I am now getting despondent and feel horrible. Is this ok? What could I be doing wrong to ask for this?

GF: It is a spiritual law that not only is anything worth having never free, but anything that we get that we don't work for and earn through diligence and effort becomes as a curse to us. Start over with everything. Drop your resentments if they are in you. Ask Truth to show you what you must learn. Truth never fails us.

KautiousKat: I have noticed certain ideas and mindsets repeating themselves as "new" things/strategies come to me. I think I am not going to make the same mistakes just because I have more professionalism, yet these mindsets/ideas are uncanny. How could I have the same thoughts if I failed last time and usually learn from my mistakes?

GF: Your question shows that you are beginning to realize that thoughts alone can change nothing. The only thing that can change what we receive is a change in what we desire.

jaybird: What is the true cause of procrastination? Can you offer a simple yet spiritually sound method of overcoming it?

GF: The true cause of procrastination is fear. And the way one overcomes the fear of not being able to get started, or that one may not succeed at what he starts, is to recognize that it is more painful to sit with this fear than it is to discover whether there is a basis for it.

TreeGuy: My whole life I have struggled trying to understand homosexual feelings within me. Can you shed some light on this subject?

GF: This forum is not the best place for such a serious investigation as your question begs. I can tell you that in part, homosexual feelings have to do with blocked emotional energies, and are (in general) the expression of conflict with no outlet. You may also want to know that whatever is turned in us that compromises us, can always be turned around by a wish to know the truth of such things.

chester: So being heterosexual would have to do with unblocked emotional energies?

GF: No, it is not a case of just “switching” sexual preferences. It’s not that “easy” or “difficult” – as the case might be. The issue, as I said, is much deeper than such a simplistic view. Only the natural opposites can develop along the lines naturally created for them.

mikejb35: I am reading The Lost Secrets of Prayer and in Chapter 2 it says "everything is already done." Does this mean that my life's outcome is already determined and I must find that outcome?

GF: No, that's not what it means. The statement "everything is already done" refers to a broader relationship between what is Light and expansive versus what is dark and constrictive. On the other hand, once we realize that a certain order of success already exists within us, and that we need only realize this eternal condition, then it can be said that our outcome is determined as well.

ADB: How does one balance doing the Work and providing for his family's present and future needs? With growing children and future expenses, the entire concept of delving into the "business" world to obtain sufficient funds is a seemed necessity, but the business world practices are so contrary to the Work. How does one stay on the path while immersing oneself into this other needed world?

GF: There is no contradiction whatsoever between being a good householder and doing one's spiritual Work. The whole of this Work that we do is to help us understand how to use the world we live in for the purpose of our inner development instead of allowing the world to drain us by dragging us into its empty structure.

ADB: I know I need to be a good householder and I can still do the Work. I'd like to think that's what I'm doing now. I just can't figure out how one builds a future financially without pursuing the almighty dollar and getting caught up in all that dark stuff.

GF: We must each choose the life we want in the present moment. We receive what we love Now. There is no other time to come, even though our senses tell us so. And if what we love has no love for us -- as in the love of money -- then that experience ought to be easy enough for us to "see" and such seeing is the only Path there is.

Cletus: Lately, I've been telling negative states to "get out of my house." Yet this seems to run contrary to ALLOWING what is dark to show itself while watching and not naming it in order to invite the necessary shock from seeing myself as I am. Comments?

GF: These two things only seem in contradiction to the mind that "thinks" toward them. When one sees what is negative in one's "house," if he is present to this punishing presence, he at once knows what its "name" is, even as this witnessing intelligence within him is silently instructing that dark to “get out of my house.” Can you see it?

straydog: I have had several bad experiences the last few years, including the loss of my dearest friend. I've been trying "leaving the empty space empty" as you've prescribed. I believe that I just learned that even through our troubles we must remember to find the "peace of the Universe" because everything that happens, happens whether we're awake or not. True?

GF: Yes, everything happens in this world to us whether we are awake to what happens or not. The difference is -- and it's a big difference -- when any event that is unwanted falls upon us working to be awake, that seemingly negative event is transformed instantaneously into new self-knowledge. The presence of this new True knowledge keeps us from repeating patterns that attract many of the negative events we're always trying to deal with. The moral is: It's better to be awake.

Rocky: I have trouble believing in God and this bothers me a lot… I don't know why! Can you give us some evidence or proofs that God really exists?

GF: First, let me tell you that a belief in a divine being is not necessary for us to have a relationship with what is Divine. When we will be truthful with ourselves, there is no escaping what begins to reveal itself as a relationship within us with something far greater than ourselves. I do from time to time "help" people to see logically the "proof" of God. Just last night's talk here in class covered some of this material. If interested, e-mail Chris at the Foundation and ask for information on the 12/4/02 talk.

Gabe: I know emptiness is not a negative state, however, what can be done to speed up the process of emptiness? Should I be proactive and involve more of myself in more activities, or should I allow myself to naturally go through it?

GF: If you knew that emptiness isn't a negative state, then there would be no fear of it. We are always trying to figure out how to race through anything that frightens us. And this is your answer. Fears can only be dissolved through direct knowledge of their actual nature. Never run from anything to escape what troubles you, nor seek some place safe in order to avoid the same.

jaybird: Can you give us some insight on the true meaning of the holiday season which we are now in the midst of? What lesson might we take from it that will aid our spiritual growth?

GF: All forms of events are reflections of deeper, more invisible movements of certain forces that give rise to certain creations. So it is with the Christmas holiday. December 21st is the winter solstice. That is the darkest day and the beginning of the birth of Light. Christmas was originally understood this way. Christ represents the birth of Light that transforms the darkness.

Diojeneez: With all these tapes, books, seminars, etc., is there a point where it all becomes spiritual greed? Should we just get two or three books and focus on them?

GF: I'll tell you something exciting: You can take one true spiritual idea and if you approach it properly, that one true idea alone can tell you the story of the universe.

ADB: I have a friend who's on the path and he's done three Vipassina meditations (ten days of 15-hour intense individual meditation) during the last several years. He say's it takes him until the fourth day to begin quieting his mind. Without meaning to sound negative, is it possible to make progress into the next level on the awareness path by meditating for 15 minutes only a couple of times a day? This seems at times like quite the mountain to climb.

GF: All of us are different. Each of us responds uniquely to circumstance. Besides, what difference does it make how long something takes that one sees is essential to his or her Real Health? Such time thoughts are torment themselves.

mikejb35: When I exhaust the energy from one of my centers, say the "intellectual", how can I call energy from one of the others, say the "emotional"?

GF: Questions such as these can only be answered by an individual delving deeply into his own condition at the time. When we drain ourselves in one area of our life, many times it's an indication we need to switch activities and not force the issue. On the other hand (and this is why a teacher is necessary), there are times to test the seeming barriers and discover whether there are secret reserves waiting for use.

Rael: There seem to be thousands of "heads" on the tree of the artificial self, each taking its turn to pop onto the screen of mind, and coming around again. If we are to defeat each of them it could take thousands of years. Do we need to deal endlessly with each of them?

GF: The story of Medusa is exactly this issue. In this myth, the creature could only be destroyed by whacking off its head instead of slaying one of its serpentine hairs at a time. This death blow to the self is not really its destruction, but more resembles its integration into a broader Intelligence. Our willingness to be aware of ourselves is this sword that subdues the self.

Tre-Tre: Sometimes I struggle to keep on course without diversions distracting me. Any suggestions?

GF: Seeing where it is that we are pulled off course by what distracts us is part of the way in which we discover the distracting nature within ourselves that believes we can reach our destination by running in circles. Catch yourself drifting off to satisfy something you've never been able to satisfy, and soon you will no longer be satisfied with this part of yourself, or its promises.

Diojeneez: You told me two months ago that Jesus "did not die for our sins." What did he die for?

GF: I am not ducking your question, but answering it in the only way it can truly be answered. If you will go to work upon yourself, asking God, the Truth, to guide you all the way out of yourself and back home within yourself, then you will know for yourself what it was that Jesus died for. His life was an example of what is necessary for rebirth. It is now, as it was then, and it's all in you.

ADB: I read your books and after I finish reading but one paragraph I find it hard to recall what I just read. Can I be THAT asleep, or is a nature in me stopping me from truly integrating these Truth teachings? I've been told by another seeker that this might be a good thing happening and not to worry about it. Any insights you can offer are, as always, most appreciated.

GF: This that you report is quite usual, and is not a sign of something good or bad. Higher impressions need a receiver and a reservoir. That is what we are working to be given and have formed within us. Keep going.

BARRY: I understand the problem is not the problem but my identification with my own inner turmoil, etc. Knowing this is not enough. Sometimes it gets to where I feel like I'm playing a spiritual game of "uncle." These dark states slowly whittle down my ability to see them for what they are.

GF: I can only tell you that all negative states have a direct and realizable source. Our work is not to conquer these states, and certainly it is not to allow them to overcome us, but it is to literally understand these states of self so thoroughly that they no longer can act independently upon us. Wholeness, self-wholeness, is the solution to the suffering of a divided self.

BARRY: Is enlightenment one's ability to be able not to identify with dark states?

GF: That is just the (bare) beginning of awakening to one’s true nature

JJ: After visiting the Foundation I feel I have found a True Light in the world. My spouse disagrees. She continues to go to church weekly, and gives money. However when there is talk of buying a new tape set or planning another visit (for myself) she becomes upset and calls me selfish. Is there a balance here that I am not seeing?

GF: Relationships where one wants to realize the truth of oneself and where the other lives in a dream of what they believe is a truth apart from themselves, are at best challenging. This much I will tell you: Have your own life no matter what it costs you. There is no substitute for the kind of self-knowledge that one must have if one would ever hope to have a real relationship with what is Eternal, call this Christ or what have you.

DennisS: If we don't choose our thoughts, who is choosing them for us?

GF: Does a clock choose to strike 12? Or is the chime an expression of a mechanical device running through its routine? If you will learn to observe yourself, without talking to yourself about what you see as you watch, you will achieve an understanding about the nature of thought that thought itself can never bring you to. The answer you seek is in this action.

Kraig: When people whom we love are unwilling to see the true source of their pain is themselves, what would be a positive course to take to support them going forward in life?

GF: Sometimes, in fact most times, the best thing we can do for someone who insists that we are a source of their suffering, is to never again do anything towards them that helps them to think this way. For instance, if your friend attacks you, don't attack back. Don't defend yourself. This will leave your friend with no option but to see that the conflict starts and ends within them.

Bonj: What role does emotion have in helping us heal? Can guilt be used to tell me that I did something that needs to be changed?

GF: Higher emotion is one of the most healing powers on this earth or anywhere else. This emotion is the flower that is born out of our efforts to know the Truth about ourselves. As far as guilt, it is a wasted and useless, ultimately self-destructive state. We need only see ourselves as we are in the moment when misstepping. This awareness not only changes what misstepped within us, but it also dismisses any wrong identification with our fault.

MikeS: Is it possible to change as a result of seeing ourselves before we misstep, or does all True change come as a result of seeing ourselves as we misstep?

GF: One gives way to the other.

seeker: Do not all men possess Goodness? Did the firemen who died on 9/11 possess it while they worked to save others?

GF: In a word, no, not all possess it. But those who don't, at some point somewhere along the line, chose against this Goodness. As far as the heroes of 9/11 are concerned, only they know what they did and why they did it.

KautiousKat: A 14-month beautiful relationship you had encouraged me to go into instead of the dark place I was in has now had to end due to a geographical separation. This person was somewhat negative and seemed to not want truth. I am happy for the break-up yet deeply saddened as we became closer than most people I know. I feel out of place and very awkward and like I'm missing something. Is this nothing more than dependency? How can I go into the new?

GF: What has to be, has to be. Try to see that much of what “lingers” is really just certain parts of you revisiting what was in order to give you a sense of being now. Drop these trips to torment.

mikejb35: In the book "Solved, the Mystery of Life" (a collection of Mr. Howard's lectures), Mr. Howard states that everyone is a "Dracula" or a "lunatic," yet you encourage us to be "out there." I don't seem to understand the apparent conflict.

GF: There is no conflict in the spiritual fact that any sleeping human being is by his or her very nature a drain of our vital forces. It's worse than this really, and that's why they're called lunatics. Lunatics believe they can fill themselves by stealing the emptiness of others.

Diojeneez: VH shocks me when he says "Everyone you know or see is determined to destroy everyone he sees -- but you can't take seeing this yet." Can you help me see this?

GF: Read the answer I just sent mikejb35. It explains all that you need to know. Now be willing to see it.

Gabe: Jesus said, "Seek ye first the kingdom, and all these things shall be added unto you." Is "kingdom" spiritual things, ministries, truth, or what? Please clarify if possible.

GF: The Kingdom that Christ spoke of, as he himself said, is within each of us. This means we do not need any fetishes to worship, temples to worship these fetishes in, and certainly not mediators between ourselves and the Divine Being that is the core of our very self itself.

Dennis: If we are spiritually asleep to ourselves, are we really choosing to live in darkness or is darkness choosing us? Without awareness, what choice do we really have?

GF: And that is just the point. Once seen, we begin to want to be awake more than we want to be instruments of (our) desires.

Bev: I know you may not plan your future talks, but could you please consider doing more work on helping us to understand the meaning of biblical scripture? It seems that so much is "black and white" with instructions (such as Paul's writings), and yet so much of it seems in conflict with what I understand about what Christ came to teach us. I want to read scripture, but I really don't understand the deeper meanings. Help!

GF: If you haven't already listened to the new tape album, "Secret Teachings of the Sacred Testaments", or the new CD "The Kingdom of Heaven is Like..." start with one of these. I discuss the interior meaning of scripture in great detail so that it has personal meaning to one's inner work. I plan more of these talks, and volume II is in the works already.

inthenow: I (and others here) have asked questions regarding self-healing practices and if there is any use/truth to them. You have not answered. Is this a sore subject that we should not seek, or perhaps you did answer many times before, or you feel it is not important enough? You have helped me tremendously and I don't want to ask something I shouldn't. Please comment.

GF: There are values to many practices when it comes to helping the body naturally heal itself. But these approaches are basically useless in the subtler realms, which is why I do not like to talk about the physical (problems). But, caution is needed in this physical approach as well; charlatans and their snake oil methods abound!

Rousseau: I love Truth and seek to know best as I can how to identify and express it at each moment. I have many questions, but this has been on my mind as I was coming to the chat tonight: I find your material very useful for my studies, so I share it with close friends occasionally. However, my wife doesn't have much patience for some of your tapes because you raise your voice quite often, and I would really like to be working with her on the upward path.

GF: If it's possible, help her to understand that nothing within us that becomes a captive of what we resist can ever hope to be free. We all have a history in which, for one reason or another, we were negatively conditioned by people and their personalities. She must learn to get past her own past if she wishes a True spiritual future. Teach her to watch her reactions and to use my talks for a double purpose. You can do this.

Diojeneez: Saint Francis of Assisi says those who do not receive the bread and wine given by priests as the "Most Holy Body and Blood of Our Lord Jesus Christ," have been damned. What's your take on this?

GF: The sacraments are (and have always been) representations of an interior act -- a kind of enactment of a spiritual agreement on the part of the aspirant to receive the living Light. We do not need any so-called priest to help us take this truth into ourselves anymore than we need someone else’s lungs to breathe.

BARRY: What should I do on Friday after working a long, hard, sweating, mundane, mental-tearing, muscle-aching, depressing job I hate? How do I keep myself from agreeing with the idea that a 12-pack of beer is the solution?

GF: See that hating anything destroys the one who hates.

inthenow: I have a serious problem with oversleeping. No matter my schedule, how much I stay active, or what's at stake, I don't care about much else when I am in the stages of waking up. I try to wake up as I am waking up but I don't worry about much, and find great comfort in sleeping in. What's wrong?

GF: If you wish to change this negative pattern, then set the aim for yourself of noticing how riotous, how noisy it is in your mind as you lay in bed not wanting to get up. This pounding is part of the problem, because the voices tell you it will only get worse if you get up. Listen to this truth: Get up when your eyes open, and open your inner eyes to the presence of these thoughts and feelings. See them instead of resisting them. This will help you change.

Sammy: I've been trying to study the nature of my wants, and "un-wants." I'm starting to see the I's that are evoked with each of them, particularly the person created by the "un-wants." Does the "un-wanter" secretly cancel the opposite of what the wanter is trying to manifest? Does this explain our frustration/sabotage when we try to achieve something from the opposites?

GF: To sum it up, self itself is a creation of resistance. This means that it always either wants something, which is a secret opposite of something it wishes to avoid, or it doesn't want something, which is again an opposite of something it would prefer to possess. When one sees that one side of an opposite cannot cancel the opposing side, and that opposites can only give rise to more opposites, lo and behold the mind that sees this is set free from partaking in the play of opposites.

Shady: Isn't wanting a type of anxiety, something that drives you a distance in a direction which takes you really nowhere?

GF: Wanting something need not necessarily be a cause for anxiety, but it often becomes so when the wanter believes that without obtaining what he desires, he will somehow be less for it.

Gabe: I have learned that beauty and a nice body can be deceiving in relationships. I am aware that inner beauty is more valuable than the external, but I still find myself being selfish and desiring exterior beauty. Is it wrong or selfish to have these desires?

GF: No, of course it's not "wrong" to appreciate physical beauty. Where we get in trouble is when we are so identified with exterior conditions that we are blinded both to what is actually within that may not be so beautiful as well as a beauty that may be hiding in a not-so-attractive exterior.

poppie: I have noticed that very damaged people have a kind of vortex I get caught up in if I don't really work at staying awake. In the long run, should I avoid these people? (It's my job to work with them.)

GF: Do your best to avoid animals when not working at the zoo. Keep the company of Truth wherever you are, even amongst truth haters.

DebbiE: You have encouraged me to get my answers from within. Do I really need to be a part of these chats or even read your work or the work of others? It seems so, but Krishnamurti writes that he never read anyone else's writings on the Work. You said in this chat that a teacher is necessary in the area of discovering secret reserves. What does this all mean?

GF: Do what you want based on what you discover – personally – are your needs. The rest of the discussion on such things is useless.

Kerry: Every time I get that sensation of being "touched" by the Truth, I feel you are by my side. Several things you have stated about fear and about Truth have "touched" my soul tonight in a way that I cannot fully explain. After hundreds and thousands of hours of trying, it's like the "Light" has finally appeared from nowhere. Can you feel this too? Is this REAL?

GF: There is no better, no more healing and uplifting “feeling” in this universe than to be touched by Truth. It confirms, comforts, and changes us all at once. Now, let go.

inthenow: Why do I always look at other women? I am capable of love and devotion but can't help looking at others even when I am in a serious relationship. Is this just part of being a man? What is it about others and pornography that is so appealing? Could it be the fact that I was taught it's all bad and to stay away from it? I know I feel like a slave and do not want this.

GF: See that there is no pleasure in compulsion, only the promise of release from the dark desire that drives it along… and that state is hell itself.

beckycs: I have my own ideas about what it means to be a kind person toward others, but a few of the people I know have called my perspective a weakness. The results of my interpersonal relationships sometimes do seem to support their appraisal since I am always turning the other cheek, but I can't seem to deny that part of myself that wants to help when I am asked to do so.

GF: Don’t make a problem where there isn’t one; if you are selling yourself to be liked, see the endless pain in this and the compromise of self involved. If not, then there is no issue, except for the pain of wanting everyone’s approval.

Gabe: Would you consider yourself as a person who has the "gift" of wisdom as stated in 1 Corinthians 12:8?

GF: I am not familiar with the passage, but any real spiritual understanding is a gift of grace.

ScJJ: How do you define enlightenment, and have you ever had an enlightening experience? If you are familiar with Andrew Cohen, he speaks about urgently letting go of fear and attachment to desire, and that planning on having several years of inner work ahead of you is a very secure position for the ego to be in which will delude us from the absolute. Is inner work really a secure illusion of the ego that keeps us from having to face truly letting go right in this moment?

GF: Trying to define what is enlightenment is a (self) trap only the unenlightened fall into -- as they (apparently) feel some need to prove their spiritual status. One can discuss certain qualities to Light as it comes to reveals its Life within one, but that’s all. And for the record, it (true dying to oneself, which is the only genuine enlightenment) does take hard work that transpires through time, even though results are always instantaneous and in the Now.

SHADY: Freedom is my destination; that's why I'm here. But when I am shown that I am still making bricks, or doing time, freedom seems so far away. Freedom isn't really that far away, is it?

GF: It is never any further away than one’s willingness to wake up, let go of self, and will what God (in His Present Moment) wants.

poppie: I have been experiencing a flood of light that flashes through me where I speak my heart unlike anything I've ever felt before. I don't know what to think about this.

GF: Just learn to watch all of these things. As Spirit comes into us, makes its Life known, there are many “strange” things that happen. Keep your eye on the Spirit, not what comes in its wake.

ASZ: Thanks for recommending The Intimate Enemy for tackling my anxiety states. Insights are profound (i.e., psychological benefit being greater than a strong feeling of self). The metaphors such as "hitchhiking spirits" really help in discovering the authentic self. It is amazing how one can get out of the viscious circle (chain of thoughts) through deliberate detachment leading to realization of " his" internal/eternal BEST FRIEND.

GF: Your insights are just the beginning of the breakthroughs that await any one who will put Truth first in his or her life.

GF: I want to send along my remaining notes concerning the importance of keeping the company of Truth. We left off with the idea that wise men and women of days gone by had always spoken of the secret value of being a Friend of Truth. They taught that the more time one spends in the company of Truth, the more certainly would its Timeless Spirit act upon him, transforming his or her nature and making it new.

Which brings us to the ageless questions that seekers of all ages have been asking since the beginning of time: What does it mean to keep the company of Truth? What is the nature of this Truth that one can befriend? Can a mortal make friends with what is Immortal and, if possible, then how does one go about cultivating his or her relationship with this Eternal Higher Conscience?

The answer to all of these questions begins with one necessary insight -- one that we must reach by first recognizing how the Living Truth has always been present in our lives, even if we weren't conscious of its kind and continuing presence all around us. Let's see if this is true.

Can we see how the real lessons in our life, those that actually strengthened us -- even as they helped make gentler our heart for (learning) them -- have always been due to the simultaneous onset and startling realization of some formerly unseen truth as it concerned one's self? And further how, all along until this moment of discovery, each of these truth-filled lessons had been an unknown need of ours, only we just couldn't see this secretly needful state of ourselves until certain other conditions had been fulfilled?

Now, if we can see this relationship between ourselves and Truth, and how its Light quietly awaits our embrace long before we suspect our need for its guidance, then we are ready for two key lessons that must be learned at once: First, we must discover what it is that is keeping us from this full friendship with Truth. Then, through this same realization, we will have before us the facts we need to deepen our friendship with it. The answer to the first of these questions is simple to state, even if it can be difficult to see. Here it is: We have been keeping company with the wrong friends. What does this mean?

Any thought or feeling that jumps up within us to explain to us why we are the way we are, that wants to help us justify ourselves after we catch a glimpse of something less than flattering about ourselves -- appears there within us for only one reason. Let's see what it is:

It wants to pass itself off as our friend-in-need -- a feat it does by working to soften the blow of our having seen some formerly unsuspected truth about our present nature. This would-be friend is our secret enemy! Here's the proof of this truth: What is True never needs an agent of any kind to soft-pedal its presence. Truth is Living Light, and nothing is more gentle than that!

Learning to inwardly recognize who and what is not our True Friend is the first step in the deepening of our relationship with Truth. To this end we must see that our friendship with what is Whole and Timeless requires that we walk away from what is fragmenting and time-bound within ourselves. And there are many ways in which one can help oneself with this new kind of seeing.

Let's review a few of the ways that can help us open our inner eyes and become a better Friend of Truth: reading truth books, being by oneself, letting go (of whatever), taking nature walks, remembering one's God, helping others grow, refusing to waste, letting others "win," respecting all forms of life, giving up negative states. All of these inner activities can have great value.

But like meditation, which is invaluable interior work for the sincere student of Truth, the above practices are only as valuable as is our understanding of their purpose. For instance, true meditation is not the path to some imagined awakening whereupon one discovers some new and improved version of his former self.

Meditation is about being awake Now. In true meditation there is no seeker and neither is there anything being sought after. So it is with being a Friend of Truth: We must not want anything from Truth other than its companionship. So then, with this in mind, and knowing the ways in which our own acquisitive minds work, the question becomes: "How" does one keep the company of Truth?

Don't let the simplicity of the following insight keep you from exploring its secret depths: Keeping the company of Truth is as simple as always working inwardly to be as truthful with ourselves as it is possible for us to be. Said with a different slant, refuse to embrace the many false friends within us, or outside of us, each time they offer us their self-serving excuses for our pain.

This one conscious act of being truthful (with self) satisfies all conditions necessary for being a Friend of Truth. It places us in the Now, where Truth lives; it arms us with the Light of Truth that cannot be overcome by any darkness perceived; and it elevates us into its Eternal Kingdom by showing us that what it gives to us in the moment was ours from the beginning of time.

Remember your wish to be a Friend of Truth. Choose over and over again to live in the light of its company and watch how the crooked places in your life straighten out by themselves. Truth doesn't just go ahead of us to reveal the Higher Path; it is the Higher Path itself! Persist with your wish to be free and do the inner work your wish requires.

GF: Welcome everyone. Let me open our meeting with some thoughts about what is required of us to realize the peace of mind for which we all long. No one can come upon this Real Silence without understanding certain truths about its nature. So we will discuss some of these truths now, and again at the close of our chat.

Now, let's begin at the beginning with an important point that ought to be more obvious to us than it is (at present): Concerning peace of mind, one thing should be clear: either we are at peace wherever we are -- because this peace goes with us -- or what we call our peace is a product of one of the following two possibilities: (1) Either by choice or by accident we have entered into some pleasing, and therefore peaceable condition, or, (2) the peace we enjoy at hand is the child of a particular condition over which we have attained some kind of temporary command.

In all situations such as these, though largely unconscious to us, we know our newfound peace is conditional -- the evidence being that we usually find ourselves hard at work to keep our present circumstances in place, whatever it takes. The proof of this uneasy "truce" with our troubles-at-bay is that we will resist any movement that runs contrary to our desired set-up.

Clearly such a qualified peace is not True Peace at all, if for no other reason than this order of peace lives in league with our unseen need to fight with anything that threatens its existence! It's obvious: Any sense of peace found through resisting some disturbance passes as soon as does our equally false sense of control (over that commotion).

Which brings us to this first key lesson: True Peace is not a sensation; neither is it anything the mind can imagine. Emotions and dreams are of the finite, temporary world. True Peace is the outpouring of a timeless Silence whose reality sits outside the movement of the opposites at play. In other words: Any peace subject to changing conditions is, at best, a collapsible pleasure.

Before we can hope to know the Peace that "passes all understanding," we must realize the nature of that True Silence from out of which it rises. The path to our perfection in Truth is of this Stillness. And even though it retreats as the acquisitive self approaches -- crying out for its solace -- this relationship is our task. So then, how is one to approach the "unapproachable"?

True Silence may be called upon, but it is without cause, which means it appears on its own and remains with one only as long as it pleases its own secret purpose. Nevertheless, one may court this sovereign Stillness through a quiet wish to understand its life within one's own. But, as with all things of the Spirit, definite rules govern the Higher Realms of this Reality.

To begin with, True Silence cannot be possessed; it is neither a thing to hold, nor some condition to be controlled. Yet, as it cannot be "gained," neither can it be lost, which means that whomever it embraces lives in a world free of fear. What does this mean to us who seek the Life of Peace? How do we proceed to enter into this inexpressible Being?

To do this one must start out from the right place. And this is where so many seekers lose their way. So our study does not begin with some imagined nature of Silence, and the pleasurable sensations of peace that accompany such dreams, but with those unseen barriers within us that prohibit this natural Grace and its Goodness from being our constant companions.

With these ideas in mind, see how simple is the following truth, for within it is a great secret about what we need to understand if we wish to proceed into the Peaceful Life: One of the main obstacles barring the entrance to the path to True Silence is that this realm cannot be entered by thought. This fact has far-reaching implications for those willing to investigate it seriously.

For one thing, this means that the True Path of Peace can be known only through the process of negation: the discovery and realization within oneself of what is whole and true by seeing through what is divided and false. Here is such a discovery: True Silence can not be found in one's future, or in any such imagined condition yet to come. Here is why this is true: The very idea of silence that we fashion for ourselves, regardless of its time frame, produces in us -- at the moment of its conception -- a kind of "noise," a certain emotional clattering that we have grown insensitive to due to our continual immersion within it. This noise is that familiar and pleasing sensation we feel when we imagine some silence soon to be our own.

Ironic isn't it, if we can see it? The very silence that we hope for in earnest is "disturbed" and kept at bay by our own manifested desire for its presence! And yet, within this very knowledge is a glimmer of Light; some truth to take us further if we will embrace what it shows us. For when we realize that our own desire -- that longing that is always at work dreaming up our more peaceable tomorrow -- is actually the agent of what disturbs our peace in the present moment, then we will begin to break free of this unconscious force -- the nature that always craves what it does not have in order to become what it hopes to be!

At the end of tonight's chat I will finish these thoughts and offer you some new ideas and insights about specific ways we can work inwardly to better understand the nature of the noise in our hearts and minds.

What would you like to talk about tonight? Have you been working on some special condition within yourself and need some clarification? Let's get started with your questions and see what happens. Please do keep your questions and comments to real issues. Speculative thinking and other philosophical meanderings are meaningless if real self-change is our wish. What do you want to discuss? What's on your mind? Let's get started!

AL: When quieting my mind, there is sometimes a feeling of peace and clarity in the present moment, but often there is this gloomy, dark feeling of emptiness, together with a sense of fear about the future making me feel very vulnerable. Why this inconsistency?

GF: One of the small pieces of higher knowledge that we need when we set out on the path of Truth is that not all of us wants to make this journey. Within us dwell certain energetic bodies that are only comfortable in a dark and divided world. When we become quiet and invite the Light into us to see ourselves and this life by, this entrance of the ineffable sets off this level of self. Watch it like you watch everything else, and let go of anything it brings up in you.

Gabe: I have a girlfriend who might be toxic to me, but I am not sure if she really is because she claims she understands her faults and wants to do better. Should I continue to pray for us both and keep faith?

GF: Such a question is difficult to answer in this environment, but if one spends time with someone who uses "sorry about that" as proof they don't want to continue being a vexation, then one may safely say this person is not interested in the change they apologize for not having made. Watch everything, be kind, and you will know soon enough what ought to be done for your own spiritual well-being.

Gabe: Are toxic relationships out to rob us of our peace knowingly or unknowingly? And is toxicity an inherent trait?

GF: Nothing steals from us without us handing over the goods.

cmontgomery: What is considered a toxic relationship?

GF: All toxic relationships have their origin in the divided mind and conflicted heart that seek resolution through relationships exterior to themselves. This seeking creates dependency that in turn produces fear and other addictive-type behaviors. These states are toxic.

chatguy: Somebody I don't really know showed me film footage of a murder. Despite trying not to identify with this, I still feel disturbed and sad about life and how fragile it is. Could this be related to me giving great attention to trying to catch the person(s) responsible for a recent break-in and considering the possibility of murder myself?

GF: If what you describe didn't cause a disturbance in you, then that would be cause for alarm. If one is someplace where one sees horrible things and one has taken himself there, one must ask himself, "Why am I shocked, knowing that I have agreed to be here?" Stay away from dark people, dark situations, and dark conversations. They are attractive to what is wrong in us, and we must learn to let these parts pass if we ever hope to know real peace.

chatguy: Thank you. Does this answer also apply to my disturbance of having a break-in while my family and I were less than 10 feet away?

GF: Not necessarily. The world is indeed sinking in its own sickness, and intrusions of physical and psychic types are surely on the upswing. Stay awake and refuse to hate. Do this by seeing that the hatred of any condition is secretly resistance to our own past, a condition of conflict that we feel the pain from and then lash out against the world as a result.

Deepa: I'm at a point where Peace hasn't come and most of what used to be my life has gone. Is there nothing I can do but watch?

GF: Until you know the answer to this question yourself, you will find other things that you believe can be done to free you from the onset of this darkness. Don't fear your situation. There are natural stages in the integration of self, and one of them that is inescapable is to have one foot in this world and the other in what awaits one with all sense of balance lost. Stay there. Stay close.

alex: I'm making good progress doing my spiritual work, but not much progress filling my external needs (money of course!). A prominent international success coach is soliciting me, saying that he can help overcome self-defeating habits and conditioning that hold me back (he wants $4,000.00). It's pure temptation, since I am in need of a solution to my external matters. I'm having a hard time with this.

GF: All prominent international success coaches are psychopaths. They are not interested in your success, but their own. One day, if you do your inner work, you will understand completely the truth of this because you will have seen the chronic deceiver at work within yourself, so that you can never be fooled by others who would deceive you for personal gain.

NIC: Please explain how it is that negative states, or negativity, harm me. I do not understand the concept.

GF: The mind cannot understand the punishment in its own negative state because the mind so possessed feels justified for its posture. If we can see ourselves for the moment when we are negative, we experience directly the stress and pain that exists in the very presence of our own punishing thoughts and feelings. A negative person is possessed by negative energies whose nature is in conflict with what is naturally whole. See all of this.

NIC: If I can learn to see the harm I can learn to stop it. How can I better determine and detect it?

GF: Silence in us is a form of perfect protection because nothing can pass into it or through it without being detected. Passive awareness is a form of self-silence in that in this awareness all of the noise of self is conscious to that awareness. Get the Seeker's Guide to Self-Freedom from our bookstore. In it is a wealth of information about detecting and rejecting negative states.

FSE: I tend to worry about everything… how does one eliminate negativity if they are constantly surrounded by it?

GF: A candle that is lit, sits in the dark, surrounded by the dark, but untouched by it. Negativity around us is merely the excuse the negativity within us uses to fill us with its own darkness. Vernon Howard used to teach his students to "brighten the corner where you are." You can do this in the midst of the darkness simply by remembering your wish for the Light and then being willing to stand within what it shows you in that moment.

whippoorwilllady: I lost my father a few weeks ago, and all I can feel is pain, anger, and bitterness toward some of the family... I try to find peace, but can't.

GF: Such times are no doubt difficult, but for anyone with a true wish for a light-filled life, there can be great benefit. Try to separate the best you can the natural grief at the loss of a loved one from the resentment now turned loose because of all of the resistance you're feeling due to this unwanted condition. There is in any loss we have, a commensurate sense of anger for the fact of seeing we haven't the control we believed we did. This anger, this negative state, wants to remain within us at all costs. It will use our own past experience with other people in such moments by calling up what they once did to us. This pain is unnatural and unnecessary in your grief. See the truth of this. Drop the negative reactions to your friends and family, and get on with what grief you must go through.

ithaca: When I think of leaving my parent's, something I really want to do, I am assaulted by intense guilt, and anytime I try to go, I end up sabotaging my success and wind up back here. Any ideas how I can break free from this very painful pattern? I am 30.

GF: Anyone who's interested, truly interested in the spiritual life, must come to understand what it means to be self-reliant. Real reliance is something we learn only by being thrown back upon ourselves after life rejects our ambitions or dreams. This true reliance that comes as a result of "mixing it up" with life reveals that who we really are can never lose anything real. Until we understand that truth, we are dependent upon everyone and consequently, fearful of everything.

ADB: I've culled this from past chatroom transcripts: Lust is the hidden opposite to desire. Desire seeks pleasure to relieve it from lust but only finds emptiness. Emptiness leads to addictive/obsessive behavior so emptiness can be escaped. Please correct what I may have misinterpreted.

GF: What you've said is fairly accurate, but lust is not an opposite of desire, lust is the unabated sensation of desire.

ADB: "Lust is the unabated sensation of desire"… OK, let's get to the root hopefully. What is the root of desire since it seems to be what is first present here? Actually I'm trying to figure out addictive behavior, and I'm trying to figure out how this all starts in a person. What is the first "thing" that starts this addictive cycle when it begins?

GF: The culprit is always some form of unseen conflict in our mind. This gives rise to resistance (to the pain) and then to the "solution," the desired.

Heraclitus: If lust is the unabated SENSATION of desire, does that mean that lust is somehow related to ALL desire?

GF: Lust is a branch of desire.

chatguy: You once said that we awaken intuition by being at the end of what we know, and new information comes to us from the spirit world. I recently heard that all the information in the universe is already laced inside of us and we need to practice deep meditation to discover it. This was used in the context of how to heal oneself naturally.

GF: Each individual is indeed a microcosm, or, said differently, a model of the universe. Within each of us dwell all of the various energies that produce phenomenal experience.

hudnut: Lately I've had a lot of hunger for new experiences. My perception has been that experiences (such as travel) can be used as a tool for inner growth and approached from the standpoint of what I can learn from them. After listening to some of your talks as I understood them, I've begun to wonder how do I discern whether I'm really benefiting from pursuing new experience, or whether most of it is just another attempt to construct a sense of self (false self-image)?

GF: Your intuition is correct in that the kind of experiences that provide true inner growth do not exist on a map that we can plot a course to. Mostly what we call new experience, when it comes to travel and people, is really just yet another kind of sensation born out of reconfiguring our perception of the places and people around us. This is not what change is.

ADB: I find myself bothered with the insight that even five minutes after waking up in the morning I am already full of thought leading everywhere from the present. I sit quietly and am unable to quiet myself if even for a second. I know the awareness of this struggle is the first step. Any comments?

GF: Only "what is" can be changed. What is not, meaning what we imagine or otherwise hope for ourselves, cannot be changed. We have so many big ideas about what it means to be awake, that they cause us to ache anytime we experience ourselves as we are outside of the pleasant sensation of these images. Stay where you are. Don't fight with it. Watch, wish, and remain awake. Truth will take care of the rest.

PUPPY: I have been dealing with a lot of deaths lately. My cousin died, estranged from our family. We had been trying to find her for the past two years. This worries me because I have a sibling who will not communicate with me and has not for three years now. She used to be a good friend and I do not know even why she is doing this. I have tried everything I can think of and I am worried about someone dying before this rift is healed.

GF: If we wish to change our lives, and realize the new order of consciousness that is not constantly set upon by fear of being alone, left out, or otherwise ignored by life, then we will have to agree to meet within ourselves these insatiable parts of us that believe we are only of value if the world around us acknowledges that. Dare to be without. Let God fill that vast, dark emptiness in you. You've done nothing but fill it with more emptiness.

PUPPY: What happens when we die?

GF: I know this answer won't do much to please you at first, but if you'll think about it, ponder it, give it room in your mind and heart, I trust you will see the liberating truth in it. Rather than asking what happens to us when we die, we must learn to ask, what is it like right now to be alive? To be truly alive, truly awake to oneself, is to begin to know what it means to die. See this.

AL: Is it true that if we really come to live in the present moment 24/7, that all fears will drop away?

GF: I'll tell you a secret. The moment that all fears drop away is when we finally lose interest in any part of ourselves that is interested in fear. This requires being present, not to the "idea" of the present moment, but to the full content of it, which will include all of our present and pressing fears. This can be done. Go to work.

Heraclitus: I got a shock awhile back from seeing myself as I am, and I'm having a hard time allowing more shocks to occur. Just as one begins to "arise," I pull back out of fear. Suggestions?

GF: Find out who it is that's "pulling back." Here's the truth: Fear fears fear. The Light does not withdraw from the darkness. If darkness calls itself the light and then withdraws when confronted by what it decries as being a darkness, you can be sure there's no light there, only the sensation of self trying to protect itself from being seen through.

langston: I have experienced the same "fear of what I see" within. Certain images are produced in my mind (that I don't want), and I run out to stop them by watching more of those same images! (As I write this I laugh at the stupidity of it). Please provide some insights.

GF: Determine to do less "fixing" of what you observe going on and more seeing (of it). You already know some of what you need to do. See more.

CHUCK: I have been haunted for years by the fact that I will never know "who I am or "where" I am in the universe, so nothing seems important without these answers… is there a solution to this problem?

GF: Anything in you that would assert in thought, emotion, or otherwise, that you cannot know your place in God's universe, is not a friend to listen to, but an adversary you have mistaken as being a counselor. Here is new counsel: Drop all of this false concern about your fate to be, and become awake now in the moment. Let go of what wrongness tells you "can't be" and you will begin to realize the truth of what is the truth of yourself.

SHADY: I have a friend who reads your books. She asked me to ask this question: How do you deal with your spouse when he is very caught up in the world of knowledge and logic? How can we help?

GF: Here is the golden rule concerning helping others along the Path: Give counsel only to those who ask for it. Anything else is a form of secret aggression in the form of interference with others for the sake of getting them to conform to your ideals. If a person is caught in the net of knowledge and logic, if it's true logic, they would be able to "hear" these ideas because nothing is more logical than Truth at the outset of one's path. If he resists, leave him alone. Do your own work and never mind the results of it. If this person you speak of can recognize there is real change in you, it may produce the attraction necessary to move him from his hardened mental views.

noah: Where you said to give counsel to only those who ask for it… what about school teachers? I've always had a suspicion that the way we teach our kids, or try to teach them, is somehow unhealthy, or as you said "a secret aggression... for the sake of getting them to conform to our ideals"... and that it is impossible to teach something that someone doesn't want to learn, which is the case with most students in our school system.

GF: It is a sad state of affairs, the way things are. Change is needed, no doubt. It is also doubtful such changes will occur given society's need as it overwhelms the individual's potential to develop according to type.

Randy: I find myself looking towards role models and trying to learn from others. I am convinced that others know more than I, including you. Should I just let go of all that? Easier said than done!

GF: Here's a secret: If the greatest man in the world, whomever that might be in your mind, came up to you today and said, "Not I, but you are the greatest person in the world," you would have a moment's flush and then a flash of absolute emptiness as you realized nothing has changed. What you wish, only God can give you. What you need, you cannot give yourself apart from this wish.

SHADY: I know you say to stay in the moment and not be drawn down out of it by others, but sometimes that is so hard when you are surrounded by many. I know you just have to keep trying and not give up. Do you have a word?

GF: Wisdom, the real Light of Life that we hope for, is not so much won by us as it is born in us by our willingness to bear our own unseen stupidity. It is in experiencing ourselves as we are that we are given the grace that allows us to lay ourselves down. It is in this process alone that we succeed, and there is no end to it. Start over, start over, start over.

Da_Contrarian: For the last ten years I've struggled with relapsing pertaining to drugs and alcohol. I had over two years clean at an early age (21) and the last 10 years have literally been hell. I seem to be attached to my pain and misery and self-sabotage when things are going well. I would just like some feedback from you on addiction. I always catch myself dwelling on the past or fearing the future.

GF: First, let me encourage you to stay the course. The Truth, as hard as it is to realize, even in a dim way at some times, is that we are not created to be conditioned or for that matter, captive of any exterior force. May I suggest to you that you call or e-mail Chris at the Foundation and order tape #205, "The Truth that Frees You from the Addictive Nature." I know it will add light to your life. If it doesn't help, just send it back, no questions asked. This is an older title, which is why you cannot order it directly from our online bookstore.

LMAC: I've seen that I've said and done some terrible things to people in my life. How do I get through this guilt and shame? Is there a right way to make amends to the people I've wronged?

GF: Oh yes, there is. Change yourself. In the long run, there is no other way that we can either be forgiven for who and what we have been, nor is there any other way to truly forgive others. Start by daring to stay awake to these recurring bouts with shame and, instead of identifying with the negative sensation that is merely a rerun of your old nature, drop it like a hot rock. You'll have to work at this, but real results will follow.

AL: Do you recommend dismantling one's own self-image? I mean, the self-image is just an illusion created from our subjective memories, pale static shadows from the past.

GF: Self cannot dismantle self. That's an illusion. On the other hand, we can be aware and awake to ourselves and in this Light, experience an order of integration that turns what was formerly dark into a new life.

ADB: I hope this question isn't too elementary. What exactly is present inside a person when a person is awake? Is the mind completely void of thought and just seeing what the eyes are looking at without putting descriptions to what is seen? Or is a person simply aware of the weight of the body and nothing else (but yes, I know, everything else)? Seeing as how being awake is so new to most people, myself included, I want to know exactly when I truly am awake.

GF: The only way that one can know what is the interior life of someone more awake than he, is to become as awake. All else is merely stimulation for the mind, which is the antithesis of being able to quietly see the content of oneself.

vince: By practicing your ideas and concepts for dealing with fear, will fear disappear or will it always be there even as one's awareness to the ways of fear get clearer and clearer?

GF: It is not fear itself that troubles or punishes us, but it is what is within us that resists fear that is such a trouble. Apart from this resistance, fear has no counterpart, which means that as we cease to resist fear, because we see through its secret nature, fear disappears because the "I" in us that was its counterpart disappears.

Rael: You just commented that it is not fear that troubles us, rather resistance to it. Could the same be said of ignorance, i.e., ignorance of the purpose of our life?

GF: The problem contains within itself the solution to it. Our problem is all of our ideas about these issues, most of which are secret forms of resistance.

MobilMan: I believe that this is a peace issue -- that the seeking of relief from pain is the reason for seeking pleasure and or other things like drugs and the like. Is finding and identifying the pain a necessary step in eliminating this cycle?

GF: You're on the right track, but rather than saying one finds and identifies the pain as the negation of this cycle, better stated is this: As one becomes aware of how pain resists itself by producing images of pleasure to come, and one realizes that this pain is the root of the pleasures he hopes for, then the opposites are cancelled in him by the Intelligence that has seen this fact.

MobilMan: So by realizing that pain is the root of the pleasures hoped for, and the opposites being cancelled in him by the intelligence that has seen this fact, is what is left the pain, or does that go too?

GF: As the unconscious conflict in us abates, goes with it the pain caused by it.

Bev: I'm so tired of living the same old life that leads me nowhere toward the Peace that I want. It all seems so futile and empty. I find I am so tired of keeping up the façade, but why is it so hard to just "let go" of it all?

GF: There is one very shocking fact along the Path that there is no escaping if we want real peace, and there are no exceptions to this rule. Right now, this moment, everyone everywhere is embracing exactly what he or she wants. Nothing can make us cling to conflict. If we do hold on to a negative thought or anxious emotion, it's because we still find value in it. This is what we must see if we want to be free.

jaybird: If I am clinging to what I want, then there are obviously many things I value on an unconscious level. Can you offer guidance to help me awaken to the false rewards and pay-offs I am (unwittingly) seeking?

GF: One good practice is to always be mindful of the relationship between what is coursing through one and what one is connected to (mentally, emotionally) in these same moments.

AOL: When we talk of transformation, who is being transformed? Our TPIC, our lower earthly nature? Or is this nature darkness that is driven out by the Light?

GF: The Light enters into the darkness, and acts upon the darkness in such a way as to transform its nature into something greater than what it formerly was, more perfected because of the presence of this light now active and working upon it within it.

AOL: If our old nature is driven out by the light, then this is merely an exchange of one nature for another. So what is transformed?

GF: You must not have read the answer. The "old nature" is not driven out, but made into a creature unlike itself by the entrance into itself of a transforming life light.

VB: My mind is always full of a lot of negative chatter. I have begun to be aware of the fact that this is coming from the false self, but being aware does not stop the chatter. Please advise.

GF: Here's an exercise that may be of help: The next time you find yourself caught up in negative chatter, come as awake to the whole of yourself as you can and ask yourself this simple question: "What does this dark dialogue have to do with my wish for a life in the Light?" If you do this enough with a wish to learn the answer to your own interior question, this chatter will gradually fall away.

801: My step-brother stole about 200K in inheritance and rewrote my grandmother's will when I was in the hospital. I hate him so much for what he has done. He fled internationally in '97 without a word. We used to be close. Do I have to quit hating or spiritually die?

GF: Just like a small flower cannot live in a hail storm as it is destroyed by the driving force dropping upon it, neither can who we really are live with hatred within us. It isn't a question of how to become free of hatred. Such questions are secretly posed to us by the resentment we resist. The question that can be answered, and must be answered, is what am I with this hatred in me? This we can see, and anything we can see in ourselves we can be free of.

noah: I've recently been listening to a lot of talk radio, interested in learning about what the government is up to, curious about what's really going on; it seems important, especially now that we're going to war -- the interest began with my wanting to know the real reasons behind why "we're" going over there to kill thousands of people. Do you agree that these are important matters in our time, and in any other time?

GF: This race called human beings has never been without a war, which means that 99% of this race called human beings are Godless creatures. If one tries to decide who he should be based upon current affairs and popular prejudices, he will remain nothing less than the handle of a pot. We are given by God the ability to choose in favor of the Love that He is. To choose otherwise is to choose from a racial consciousness steeped in conflict, set only to produce more pain.

Bev: I just don't get it -- if we (human beings) are created in God's image, why then are 99.9% of us "Godless creatures"? It makes no sense to my simple mind.

GF: In short, because we have become so totally self-centered, God has been squeezed out of our lives.

Roy: From your lesson "Use Your Pain to Realize the True Purpose of Life," where you describe the painful but natural conditions into which we are born, I have the impression that everything I've ever known or come to value is actually working against my greater good. Is this the nature of this Work, to go against the grain, against the natural flow of the forces that govern our lives?

GF: I'll say this much: There does come the day, the dark but glad day, when we realize that most of what we think is the very best part of us is indeed the very thing that has been punishing us all along. Such shocks shake the very fabric of one's constructed self, and make clear to it that it hasn't a leg left to stand upon that is real or can be counted upon. Welcome the shocks. They are sent by Truth for your transformation if you'll accept them.

chatguy: I believe I discovered obsessive compulsive traits I never thought I could ever have and remember having these characteristics at a very young age. I also realized that others in my family tree have these as well. Is this a generational curse? Is there even such a thing? More importantly, what can I do?

GF: Most compulsive behavior is undertaken as a path to an imagined pleasure. Now realize that there can be no such thing as pleasure that is compulsory. A slave has no choices except to serve what has mastered him.

SHADY: How do you relate to being led by the spirit with the truths you have, for there is always more?

GF: I wait and watch, work some, and then start again.

Heraclitus: In social circumstances, I don't want to wear a mask of false cheer, nor do I want to be a stoic "drag." I would like to be naturally pleasant, relaxed and spontaneous, but I'm too preoccupied with protecting myself. Help!

GF: Get weary of yourself, which is different than fighting with yourself over what you are "not."

jaybird: In one of your books, you counsel the reader to "Make all empty feelings reveal their real contents to you." Would you please explain this idea a bit further, and can you offer a specific exercise that would aid in accomplishing this?

GF: We must lose our strange fascination with our pain. Instead of thinking from your anger, blaming others for the fire you feel, learn to "stand" in these flames. Consciously ponder this pain, which means don't allow it to divide it and you into two different things, which it does once the pain gets you to identify the "enemy" outside of you to blame.

dngrB: Mr. Howard once said that us guys should forget every woman on the planet and put truth first. Easier said then done. Could you please give some encouragement?

GF: The path to one's true transformation is never found through the avoidance of anything, but through outgrowing what becomes secondary once understood.

LMAC: How does one deal with physical pain such as arthritis, or any pain for that matter? Is this pain a part of aging or can the root of its origin be eliminated?

GF: Life is (for those who can "see" it) a process of letting go. Suffering is for a reason in all cases. Take what steps you can to not aggravate what makes you ache, and learn to use the rest for self-realization.

Manny: Can you give us some encouragement… perhaps describe what the emotional life is like for the awakened man? Are there new emotions? Is love less fleeting? Is it truly free of conflict?

GF: One knows that there is a Great Purpose behind all things and that his or her only responsibility is to act accordingly to what is continually revealing itself. In this Purpose is Intelligence and Wisdom, a Kindness beyond words.

asz: I've had a history of anxiety states, quite severe at times. With time I've learned to control them. However, with increased stress at work or problems at home, panic attacks kick in. At first, not knowing what was going on, I would be overwhelmed with fear. When fear subsides, stomach problems go on. I feel tired of this constant disease.

GF: The root is always in undetected division in us, conflict that creates effects that debilitate, one way or the other. If you have not read the material in (my book) The Intimate Enemy, I strongly suggest this as some real medicine. If you don't find this true, return it, no problems.

Bev: Thank you for the talk where you said our lives are supposed to be a "constant state of asking God for help." I've been messing mine up for so long that I found great relief in the prospect that God is willing to show me some better ideas if I only continually ask and stop deluding myself that I know what I need!

GF: Good. Now go to work!

AL: Is it possible to really "Let go and Let God" by gradually replacing one's own self/will with a higher "smarter" and all-seeing/knowing will?

GF: We do not replace our will with another will, for the very effort is the essence of willfulness. We must awaken to the actuality of ourselves, of our so-called "will," and in this awakening comes the exchange.

Manny: I never feel as if I am doing "enough" inner work. While I'm sure I'm not, is the voice that tells me that just the voice of fear?

GF: Only when one is sure that one has done all that is in his or her power do these voices lose their "power" to haunt of taunt.

Poppy: How is it I can experience two night time dreams of pain and loss, but in the day time feel okay and at peace about this ending of relationship? I don't think I'm kidding myself about doing better, but am I?

GF: Evidence points to your conclusion. What is not seen in the day is dreamed at night.

AL: It seems to me that I can never be at peace and at the same time live in time (the imaginary past and future). Only in the present moment can peace and reality be found. Is this correct?

GF: To dream such dreams is to invite rude awakenings, always.

GF: Our time together on-line has nearly run its course, and I want to send along the notes I promised to conclude with at the beginning of our meeting tonight. Here is a brief summary of what we learned in the opening remarks: As long as our time is spent in any form of an imagined peace or contrived self-silence, regardless of how we achieve this pleasure for ourselves, such quietude is not real Stillness at all, but only the sensation of it. These sensations always fade away, leaving us feeling betrayed and hungry for more!

The conscious realization of this mistaken identity -- where we have communed with what is little more than a form of psychic noise, calling this state of self the Celestial Quiet we long for -- leads us directly to the threshold of the Real Silence our spiritual heart longs for.

Gradually, but definitely, we realize what must be done: Now we must let go of our thought-self; we must die to its endless desire to become what it isn't by imagining what it will be. So that instead of living from this ultimately empty sense of one's "becoming," we do the real silently-seeing work of being what we are in the moment. This silent kind of seeing frees us.

For this reason, our moment-to-moment meditation, our awaked-ness to life, becomes revelation when we open ourselves to what is and see what it reveals. With these truths in mind, study the following insights into True Silence. Allow their understanding to become your own. Ponder them. Quietly turn them over and over in your mind. Soon you will hear what cannot be told.

1. Just as true emptiness holds all things, True Silence bears all things. Whatever is brought into this Silence, whatever it touches, is gradually silenced . . . yet not by an act of domination, but through a peaceful integration of a lesser into a Greater.
2. True Silence is an interior Presence and not an exterior circumstance. It has no opposite and is not created, which means nothing can act against it or serve to enhance its existence.
3. True Silence cannot be cultivated, but the conditions that prohibit its presence may be understood out of being.
4. True Silence is perfectly empty of content and completely full without contradiction.
5. True Silence is without preference and neither rejects nor resists any condition.
6. True Silence is the heart and soul of compassion.
7. True Silence doesn't have intelligence; it is Intelligence of an order that a divided mind cannot comprehend.
8. If we wish the presence and peace of True Silence, then the great necessity of solitude should be as evident to us as realizing that any seedling must be left undisturbed if it is ever to break out of its dark ground and live in the light.

As the understanding of these truths grows in us, and we look at our life through its eyes, we come to realize that this new silent seeing is itself a part of the contentment we seek. Here is why: The "eyes" of this passive awareness are not just "filled" with what they behold, but actually partake in the life of all that is perceived. Can we see what this means to us?

The absence of division between seer and seen is the negation of desire. And when the stress and pressure of longing to possess whatever it may be are at last negated by this higher self-awareness, goes with them all of that painful conflict that must occur whenever there exists a sense of separation between ourselves and our hoped-for peace of mind.

As challenging as this sounds, we may be encouraged. Truth itself is on our side. In this life everything is either growing or it goes the other way. To this rule there are no exceptions. To positively comply we need only be willing to grow in the Truth of ourselves, and act from what is seen as true. In this way the contradictions in our consciousness are cancelled.

Here is a last thought we can all use every day to help us along the way to living in True Silence: Once we realize that what we must understand (if we are to be quietly free) can not be spoken, imagined, or otherwise fashioned by thought, only then will we stop talking to ourselves about what we need. True Silence awaits the one who will see this Truth and be still.

Our time has run out for tonight. I trust you will quietly think on these things we have worked together to bring into the light. Do not believe in discouragement. It is a noise that calls itself a good neighbor. It -- and what it would have you believe -- is a lie. We may be free of what taunts us if we will learn the truth of how it holds power over us.

GF: Welcome to our chat tonight. Before we begin, I want to give you some things to think upon that are vital to true self-victory. No one can hope to grow in Spirit who ignores the truths about to be told. We begin with a short story:

Two men who have worked for the same company for years, and who share an office, are having a conversation over lunch. They are in the company cafeteria with other workers around them also eating their meals. Bob watches his friend Joe reach into his briefcase and pull out a small bright blue bottle that he has seen a number of times now over the last ten days or so.

Joe seems content and is even humming to himself as he takes a fairly deep swig directly out of the bottle. Bob watches this and is moved to ask: "How is it going Joe? Are you feeling any better these days? You didn't say much last week after your doctor's appointment."

Joe finishes his swallow and smiles back at Bob: "Well, first I saw a few specialists who didn't know their heads from their elbows, so I walked one block down the street and went through a few more visits with some others. Then I found the greatest doctor in the world. He knew right away what I needed, and the whole thing was virtually painless!"

"That's good news," said Bob taking a bite of his sandwich. "He must have been something pretty special, because I have never seen you be so religious about doing anything, let alone taking medicine." Bob continued with a wry look coming over his face. He couldn't help his next tongue-in-cheek comment. "So, I guess his prescription must have been just what the doctor ordered?"

"To tell the truth, Bob," Joe lowered his voice and shook his head, even as he looked around the room to ensure no one would hear his confession, "I haven't seen much improvement, if any at all. I'm still in a lot of pain!"

Somewhat confused by this report, Bob whispered back, "But I've been watching you for over a week now and you haven't missed taking one dose of those drugs he prescribed. What are you doing with that stuff if it isn't helping you to get any better?" What he heard next just about knocked him out of his chair.

Joe leaned further forward onto his chair, looked down at the bottle still in his hand, and whispered through a strange smile, "Well, the truth is -- even though this prescription isn't helping to heal what hurts me, it does kind of mask the pain if I take enough of it. And," he leaned even further forward, "you would not believe how good this medicine tastes!"

As we will prove, human beings are a study in stupidity. Instead of being self-investigating (as we are created to be), we are self-deceiving. Instead of embracing the inner work of honest self-seeing, by whose Light alone we come upon the life-healing truths that heal us of self-ignorance, we will make a truce with the parts of ourselves that punish and pain us. Why?

The truth is simple. We have come to believe, through a host of social and cultural mandates, that whatever we suspect is wrong with us -- whatever character faults we suspect may be lurking in heart and mind -- must not only be hidden from the world around us, but kept from ourselves as well. Any such unconscious conclusion is a prescription for sickness by sickness.

Here is the real medicine: We are made to be self-correcting. Each real correction made in us is the same as elevating ourselves above the unknown nature whose dark influence we had lived under. Like moving from a hot desert climate to a cool mountain retreat, each discovery of what darkens our path through life is the same as walking in the Light towards a Higher, happier Ground.

There are many parts in all of us that do not want us to hear the following: The entire universe is working to help each of us become whole and "perfect in heaven." The conditions that we run from, wherein we feel as though our own weaknesses will overcome us, are themselves unique creations of a Great Intelligence that wants us to learn of its Timeless Strength.

Yet, simply to state these truths, as bright and liberating as they are, is not enough. To be transformed by any Truth we must see the living truth of it. In this instance, as it concerns the recurring stress and sorrow that runs through our relationships like the veins of a leaf, we need some new ideas. Here is one such insight to help open our eyes to the healing that awaits us: At present, what little awareness we have of what is wrong with us feels to us as though life is trying to punish us for what we are. Nothing could be further from the truth. Our awareness of those aspects of ourselves where we know we miss the mark is not life condemning us. We do this dark deed to ourselves. It is misunderstanding the Goodness of life that causes us to miss seeing it.

Each time we catch a glimpse of a character shortfall in us, we do so by the grace of a Living Light. And it invites us, asks us -- in the only form of a "dialogue" that we can share for now with this force for our perfection -- to see ourselves in its light. So it is not negative to see the negative since it is the Perfectly Positive that makes this kind of seeing into ourselves possible.

All this compassionate Intelligence asks is that we accept its corrective Presence in us, and then stand there, as conscious as we can be, within Its Light within ourselves. If we will receive what it reveals, we are released from that former darkness. The Light transforms it and we are equally changed in that moment.

Before the end of tonight's chat I will offer some special short insights into what each of us can do to strengthen the potential in this process of allowing the Light to transform us.

Now let's get to your questions and comments, but please work to remember that our task here on-line together is to address what is real and what leads us to authentic self-transformation. Let's talk over the issues you are working upon within yourself, which means let's not spend our time wandering through frivolous philosophical questions or otherwise imaginary religious ideas. What would you like to talk about tonight? Let's see what we can learn together.

Deepa: I feel as though I have read and thought enough. Nothing can help me anymore, and there is nothing more I can do. This makes my heart ache and at the same time I feel a kind of peace.

GF: The condition that you describe here is a necessary stage in your spiritual growth. When one begins to realize that true transformation is not a mental affair but a spiritual action, then this same person begins to reach the end of whatever sensations and experience his former thought-life could provide for him. Stay in this seeming emptiness. Something will bring you what you have been waiting for.

Rael: I have heard this term "emptiness" used many times, but seemingly have no experience of it. The field of my mind seems to be sufficiently full of me that there is no space left for this emptiness. The only thing I can relate to that seems to come close to what is called "depression," when life seemingly deals one a severe blow, and I really have no interest in going there. What is this emptiness of which you speak?

GF: Have you ever noticed that moment between a hope lost and a new one being formed? Have you ever sat at a party and didn't want to be there, but didn't want to be anywhere else? In such moments, there is a gap that exists in what is ordinarily a seamless string of desires. In this gap is the emptiness spoken of. It is not a negative quality.

kda: I have had moments, during meditation or watching myself, in which there seems to be "nothing there" (a quiet void). I sense this is part of what we are striving to find, the emptiness you speak of. I admit a slight fear of this. Please comment.

GF: The "fear" of this silent space is the creation of thought suddenly finding itself without an opposite by which to "know" itself. So the fear felt fills the space. See this reaction for what it is and it passes, leaving the silence golden.

SHADY: Do you believe in the saying, "Those who fail to plan, plan to fail"?

GF: No human being sets out to consciously defeat himself. What is truly conscious cannot and will not compromise itself. What this means is that there are parts in us that by their very nature must manifest a kind of failure for whatever they either attempt to do or refuse to do. It could be said that until a person understands his or her own mind and heart, they can't do anything but come to a failure.

Oneonta: What is the proper way to earn a living?

GF: Of course best of all, and certainly within everyone's reach, is to work at what one loves. Apart from the occasional circumstances where responsibilities negate this possibility, one should find a work in which they have no feeling of compromising themselves in what they do. Lastly, it really doesn't take much to live a simple life. When we are whole, it doesn't matter what we have or where our time is spent.

hasselhoff: If you can be happy at whatever you do or wherever you are, what is the point of leaving your house? Could you just sit in a dark room and be happy? This seems ridiculous, but it troubles me.

GF: What you don't understand yet is that there is a Living Intelligence, a True Love, a Timeless Light, and that these great forces have their own "plan" for each of us. Whoever these Friends find their way into never wonders about what he or she should be doing with their lives… they are fully active.

Roy: Is simplifying your life -- like taking an easier job to allow more "alone" or study time -- the same as taking the path of least resistance? Or is this new desire one of our rewards for working on ourselves?

GF: It could be either. Only the one making such a decision knows what his heart actually is attempting. When a man or a woman begins in earnest -- because they have been touched by Truth in some way -- to long for a deeper relationship with that Truth that has touched them, there is very little that will stand in their way to make what changes this new longing is leading them to.

801: I've taken prescribed medicine to dull "something" since 1984. Since then other good doctors have taken me off of it from time to time only to put me back on. Some of these people condemn me for taking it. Maybe I should stop it, but find the alternative unworkable, meaning a long rehab that insurance companies hate. No money comes in because work is impossible.

GF: Each of us, in the long run, is responsible only for ourselves. By this I mean what others think or would have us do or be, has no real bearing on our own wish to be free and the path to freedom. There is no limitation to the action of Truth upon a person. It calls for and comes to whom it wills. If you want a real life, remember your aim, do what you can for it, and let what happens, happen.

lightseekers: How do we see the living truth of a despairing situation and get new insights when we keep getting failure from our attempts to just make a living? When employers deceive and then drop you, how do you find the light and learn the lesson to move on if the lesson of trusting the light to help you through the inability to provide for your family's need won't leave for years?

GF: There is no question that this is a world in which a kind of wickedness runs wild. There is also no question that we must provide for those we love, if that is our task. What we should all learn to question is what possible value there is to hating anyone or anything for the wickedness it does or brings. This is a waste of energy and the destruction of the possibility to be free from the "victim" mentality. Start over.

fidel: The further I go into my own spiritual growth, the more work I seem to need to do. I don't begrudge the labor -- I love it -- but it does seem strange that things get "harder" instead of easier.

GF: Real inner work appears to move in two directions at once, as you have stated your experience indicates. But we must be awake and aware of one special bit of understanding. As we become more aware and live in more internal light, the darkness seems greater because of the greater light. The darkness then decries, "Look how big I am!" and we are tricked into identifying with it rather than holding this in the developing light within us. Nothing can stand in the way of the one who loves Truth.

mast: First I would like to thank you and pay my respect for shedding light into the dark corners of our lives, and making us aware of one another and a clear way of living. Now, my question is, as I am trying more and more to understand myself, I see everyone around me also in deep pain of one form or another. I sometimes feel that it is my responsibility to take them out of their pain. What should I do?

GF: Try to see the following even though it's very subtle: One of the reasons that we are often "caught" up in the pain of others, and considering it as you have outlined, is that it allows us to be distracted from the content of our own conflict or unhappiness. Real understanding does not resist anyone else's pain or the pain realized within itself.

mast: But seeing others in pain makes me feel guilty and my mind tells me to stop my pursuit of awareness as at that point in time it seems selfish.

GF: The guilt you speak of is merely an opposite of an imagined power or possession you presently live with. Real seeing of others' pain does not drag the seer into that pain then seen. The one who sees another's pain understands that this sorrow is the illegitimate child of ignorance. He does not try to solve this pain, as any action towards it only confirms what is its non-reality.

suzannemly: How do we "know" what is real? I now realize that I'm not my job, my body, etc. I also realize that I'm not my mind, but I still struggle with letting go of my intellect because it's been such a huge part of my self-identity for so long.

GF: Learn to watch your life, your friends, your circumstances, your thoughts and feelings about these things without telling yourself what it is that you see moving before you. Thought is always trying to come to what is real without realizing all it can ever find are the forms and images brought forth from out of its own nature. What is real need not think about itself. Stay aware instead of slipping into questions about reality.

Rael: Through the years I have gone through periods of intense seeking, lasting three or four years, and then have run out of energy. It has been four years since I have entered this latest phase and I feel the intensity fading. I no longer have the enthusiasm to pick up the books that have been my comfort. I don't want to lose focus, but know it has happened before.

GF: There is a very definitive principle when it comes to one's wish and will to awaken. It is known as the law of discontinuity, and it has to do with the fact that under law, all vibrations have a tendency to diminish and ultimately turn back in the direction of their original impetus. You must understand this cycle and do what you must to provide yourself with a shock to restart your intention.

newhere: The law of discontinuity seems scary if it is in fact a real law. Will just understanding it get rid of it, such as in fear?

GF: There's no truth that needs to be feared. Truths are always the friend of the man who seeks self-knowledge. The law of discontinuity is real. There is no getting around it. But within it exists a principle of a different order of continuity that has nothing to do with the continuation of self. See what you yourself told me is true of you, and that should start you on the right path.

Roy: Concerning the law of discontinuity, could the understanding of this law in itself be the "shock" that we need to continue our intentions, or must the "shocks" be external circumstances?

GF: Yes, it could be stated like this. Yet, while I know it is difficult to think on these things without imagining cause and effect scenarios, when we actually see the truth of something, untainted by self interest, this whole seeing restores us to our native Whole Being. Higher Consciousness will not compromise its own state.

Rael: Getting back to my earlier question, I realize it's more than that I am losing interest in seeking… I have lost interest in everything that I formerly cherished, everything in this life. It is like there is a numbness in my brain whereby nothing generates the interest that it previously did. I am concerned about this. I feel like I could just fade away and become a nothing.

GF: This is a "horse of a different color." As one grows inwardly, in true self-knowledge, part of that real growth is reflected in an ending of the seeking of sensation through experience. The "numbness" you speak of is a sensation of thought considering its own diminishing importance – brought about by the gradual dissolution of the opposites at work in you. All in all, all is well. Stay the course.

sayaloud: Sometimes what you are saying is so confusing. It is often like you are speaking in parables.

GF: What is true can never be said directly in any way that for having spoken it someone will change hearing it. This is why Christ spoke of the need for "ears to hear." We must learn to read or listen to truths with our intuition.

Bev: It seems the more that I become focused on bringing in the Light and becoming aware, the more that events conspire in my life very negatively. I know you say to talk to God through the storm, but how do I keep strong and focused when events keep piling up and knocking me off track?

GF: Your attention is your attention. The parts of you that pull your mind and heart to dwell upon whatever darkness they project have no power apart from what you grant them when you consider their sensational demands. Take your attention back. Live without these inner "bums." They will find a new place to live and you will be nearer the peace you long for.

steveb: Would you say that fulfillment comes more from sharing our light than from receiving more light?

GF: It just doesn't work that way. What real Light comes into a person cannot help but come out of that person. If it's any other way, then it's not real Light.

puppy: This week I attempted to help a severely injured deer who appeared in my garden... I have not been able to get the picture of that deer out of my head. I find it very difficult to deal with mean people, and I find it near impossible to deal with any kind of cruelty to animals. Why does such awful stuff exist in this world? What am I supposed to learn from this?

GF: Try to see the truth of the following: This pain that you are in over the pain you see in an animal is purely the product of negative identification. The animal itself may suffer a physical pain, but if you've ever watched such injured creatures, you know they do not suffer psychologically. Drop this identification and you will drop the despair it creates.

sayaloud: What does it mean to live more in the internal Light? Meditate, contemplate, read?

GF: Meditation, contemplation… all of these acts help a person realize a part of himself that is not the same as his thinking nature. As the mind stills, awareness blossoms. As awareness expands, expanding with it is this "Living Light." Anything brought into this light of higher awareness is known by the self-working person in ways unavailable through other means.

RobF: Recently during meditation I find it hard to keep my mind from wandering to mundane thoughts. I need to listen to "The Lost Secrets of Prayer" again for inspiration. Any other suggestions?

GF: See the fact that your mind wanders. Then, bring it back. Watch the wandering, and watch the return. Stay with being a "watcher" of your own mind instead of considering yourself its guardian. Stillness comes when the mind understands its own operations in the opposites. Stillness cannot be forced upon the mind; it must be welcomed by a mind made receptive to it.

steveb: Do you have any experience with Kabbalah? I have heard of "holy" books from the Kabbalah tradition which are said to have a beneficial effect on ones who keep them close. Even if you do not study them, can such a thing be true?

GF: It is true that belief conditions experience. What is not true is that one can change their experience in a meaningful way while clinging to false beliefs. What this Work is about is changing the entire nature of one so that one does not have to believe in what is Real because its life has become one with his own.

steveb: Kabbalah teaches that we are all born full of light and come here to lose our "bread of shame" over only taking light from the creator, and we need to give of that light in this world so that we can be closer to the nature of the creator. Does this make any sense to you?

GF: Yes, it does.

newhere: What would you recommend to a close friend who has not yet chosen to see real life? I am having problems helping. They do not have much faith in God and seem to rather go through the emotional chaos. Can I walk away if I love them?

GF: Depending on the case and the degree of its direness, the question should be, "If you love them, how can't you walk away?" Sometimes, in the name of a false love that is secret identification and unconscious dependency, we enable those around us by consoling what we know is wrong within them. Be kind, be true, but above all, put the Truth first in this relationship.

Judy: When I meditate or otherwise get "wrapped up" in things spiritual, I tend to lose track of time, and then I feel guilty because I didn't accomplish what I could have or should have in my daily "to do" activities. There never seems to be enough time to tend to both. Any suggestions?

GF: Each of us does in our daily lives, one way or another, what suits us best. There's always a way to make time for silence and higher aspirations. Having said this, why do we have to separate out spiritual times from our "worldly life"? As we awaken, this division ends and we realize that apart from practical thought and its need, we can always be mindful and prayerful.

sayaloud: I want so much to live through Spirit 24 hours a day… do I need to meditate and contemplate for extended periods daily to get this?

GF: Learn to listen to your heart, not to the mind that wants to acquire what it imagines will end the emptiness it creates in its unconscious (unwhole) state. It is a paradox. The desire for Truth destroys the newness needed to commune with it, yet the love for Truth is the ground upon which it grows.

Bev: I listen to your tapes almost every time I get in my car. Often my 4- and 6-year-old children are in the back seat and ask me, "Why does that man yell so much, mommy?" So, for them I ask you: Why do you "yell" so much when giving your talks?

puppy: I also ask you this about yelling because I find that I cannot HEAR you on the tapes when you sound like you are yelling! Are you aware of this?

GF: With all due respect to both of you, if you can't understand what you call "yelling" on the audiotapes, then you ought not listen to them.

Bev: Just to be clear… I actually like your style of talking and explaining, and enjoy your approach very much. All of your tapes and stories are extremely helpful to me. It is my young children who describe you as "yelling."

GF: This answer is written as I edit the chat, something I do each Monday following the on-line meeting. It is then that I answer the remaining unanswered questions. Here is an additional thought – in story form -- concerning the question of the way I speak, although my first answer stands: A conductor walked up to the podium and began conducting his newest piece. When he finished, someone walked up to him and said, "I loved most of what you presented, but somewhere in the middle of the concert you stopped gently waving your arms and became very animated and began strongly punctuating your movements. I didn't like that part at all! Why do you have to do it that way?" The conductor smiled and said, simply: "The music calls for it."

sayaloud: What does it mean to "flow"?

GF: Have you ever skied down a mountain? Perhaps you have ridden a bicycle and found a gentle path to glide along. One is in the flow of things when one is a part of the invisible laws that govern balance and other such factors. Spiritually the same would hold true. One is in the flow when one is not divided apart from life.

lightseekers: How do I help my husband to recognize a "devil" working on him when his fear of feeling victimized leads to anger? He is aware of the influence after the fact, and sometimes during a stressful situation. We both know that the anger will not help solve anything, but he was raised in a reactionary family, and is struggling to let go of that response.

GF: What could be better than having a mate with whom you can begin to watch and work upon these spiritual principles? It's all right that you catch these things after the fact for now. That's a lot better than not seeing the fact that such negative states are an invasion and compromise love in all its forms by their presence. Encourage one another. Work with one another. Truth will prevail for both of you.

mast: You say that life wants us to learn certain lessons which we have not realized, but is this the way to teach? There is so much fierce competition all around. Everyone (including me) seems to be fighting like dogs over a piece of bone. If we don't fight, we lose it, and if we keep on fighting we lose ourselves. What to do?

GF: The day will come, if you will persist with your wish to be free, where you will understand that the only thing that fights over bones or crumbs or table scraps is the dog nature in a human being. We are not created to snarl and snap at each other or life in the hope of snatching from some other creature what it falsely believes is comfort and reality. There is no substitute for such self-seeing and knowledge. As far as what to do when one doesn't know what to do, there is a passage something like, "He whose mind is stilled in me do I grant Peace." I also like the 23rd Psalm.

Diojeneez: Lao-Tse says there is no one to teach because there is no self or other. I think I might be missing something, so I ask, why do you teach?

GF: What Lao-Tse says is true. But what is true in one world for the man who lives there is seen as a riddle, and often a confusion, to someone living in a world where self and other both seem to exist simultaneously. Without someone to tell you that life is in levels and can only be understood through this awareness of them, you would not understand the True Teachings, regardless of who presents them.

Diojeneez: Lao-Tse is too deep for me. He also says that if we "abolished knowledge and wisdom, the people would profit a hundredfold." What does that mean?

GF: The truths of any great awakened being cannot be grasped with thought. These ideas, their insights, reflect upon and express the existence of a world that is not divided up into opposites. As we grow and become more whole, the Truths these wise ones have passed down are found to be living within us and not apart from us as in "knowledge."

Diojeneez: OK, I almost see the light, but not quite! So how exactly do you abolish the ideas of self and other? This is too revolutionary. This changes everything! When self and other are gone, what's left? How can I honestly walk into this chatroom and say "shady, mast, you, etc. are not really here, because there is no self and no other"? Or am I still missing something?

GF: It isn't that one "abolishes" the ideas of self, or of others, as such an approach is yet just another dead-end. We must discover within ourselves the truth of ourselves; this alone changes "how" we perceive the world because only such true self-knowledge transforms the perceiver. Our thought nature, which is but a small part of our total Being, dwells -- meets life -- in the opposites; it must have a "you" distinct from "me." True, separate bodies and names do exist, but the consciousness in these forms is one energy.

newhere: After I learned from your "finding purpose" talk that we need to rid ourselves of false purpose, I have had more peace and happiness. I do not believe I have found my "purpose" as of yet, but I Love this work and understanding. Is this my purpose, or something after I understand where I go wrong?

GF: This is a fine beginning. Love always leads to Love. Love always purifies the lover it leads to itself. Stay with this wish for Truth and your growing love of it. It will be returned to you in ways unimaginable.

danbo: I've recently discovered how entrenched I am in identifying with the image of myself as a "husband." Now this image is being threatened to be uprooted and I find myself caught up in periods of severe depression and obsession with the "memory" that is contained with this image. Help please.

GF: No one visits a dark and dank cell deliberately. It's unpleasant there, even dangerous. See that there are parts of you that want to drag you off into these memories and the images that support them. As you catch yourself about to be made a captive, realize there is no true imperative that you dwell in the darkness presented before you. Your awareness of this dynamic will defeat the visiting darkness.

danbo: I realize that as I am identified with the image of being a husband, that I feel utter terror about being "alone." I know being alone is the place to really be awake, but at the same time it is a part of me that feels total terror at the possibility of this situation ending in my being alone. I hope this make sense and you can offer insight again.

GF: We must see that fear of something can never protect us from what we fear; it (the state) only offers us ways to prolong a feared outcome by avoiding or otherwise distracting us from the fear itself.

trying: For years I've done spiritual books, tapes, talks, etc. I'm grateful for the growth I've achieved, but now instead of non-spiritual things, I'm thinking spiritual things, with the added aspect of judging others for their lost-ness. Is self-observation really enough?

GF: There is a difference between self-observation and being unconsciously absorbed in the self that thinks it is seeing. All forms of judging others belongs to a divided self. When we are really watching, we see both what is before us and our judgment of it at the same time. Seeing these opposites without identifying with them is self-observation.

newhere: Please explain "opposites." I thought they were one in the same.

GF: They are, but not to the self whose only existence is the desire to either obtain or avoid what is an opposite created by thought.

sayaloud: Often you give information that makes a lot of sense, as with dropping identification and dropping despair. What is it that interferes with the truth and sensibility of this being initiated and maintained?

GF: There are parts in all of us that can only continue to dwell and dominate us as long as we remain unconscious or unaware of their presence in us. These "creatures" -- the content of our own past -- have a vested interest in seeing that we remain unseeing, but they are powerless in the Light.

BarryF: Can you comment on the idea of "hope"? I wonder if having hope about some future event is inherently self-defeating. Do you address this in any of your books? Is there any context in which hope is appropriate and self-healing?

GF: There is a beautiful passage by the apostle Paul. It says, "Our hopes must be in things unseen, for who hopes for things seen?" What this means is that whatever the mind can hope for is already a part of it. We hope for the possession of things seen, believing that the new sensation we have while in this hope is the same as finding true newness in ourselves. It is not. In some ways, we can have "hope" in things unseen when in the deepest parts of ourselves we are able to see or otherwise directly realize the Goodness of God, of the Living Light, and its intention for our fulfillment in it. As far as product, you might e-mail Chris at the Foundation and request the "Secret Teachings of the Sacred Testaments."

hasselhoff: I am at a college of 20,000 people and I feel that I don't have anything in common with anyone anymore. My false self is pretty lonely. We all seem like programmed robots, yet I feel like I am going in a direction that they have never suspected. What is the difference between a need for companionship and loneliness?

GF: The need for companionship can be a natural expression of the need for a certain level of communion, or it can be that one is merely trying to escape his fear of being alone. Only you can discern the state that "speaks" to you about such matters.

mast: There are times when I feel surprised, as in how I start dancing or make certain gestures without my will while at the same time knowing it's under my control. Does it have any significance in the spiritual path?

GF: If you are acting out any state without being conscious of its press before you express that, you are not in control of anything – including the one feeding you these explanations for why you do what you do.

Bev: Why is this work to "watch and come awake" so simple to understand yet so difficult to implement consistently? I've found having the knowledge about what to do doesn't even begin to scratch the surface when it comes to actually living it.

GF: Such discoveries are real and required for the aspiring person to uncover. These truths (about what we can and cannot do) set the stage for real transformation.

mikayla: Did you post the answers to the questions that you didn't get to during the "Talks in The Pines"?

GF: I believe these did get posted in the chat that followed in July. Also, the question and answer session was included as part of "The Heart and Soul of Freedom" tape or CD album which is available through this website. Otherwise, please feel free to submit your question again at our next chat.

SHADY: In today's world, education is very important and is put before everything else. How does education affect our finding ourselves?

GF: What passes today for education is more inculcation than true learning. The further conditioned one becomes, the more difficult to awaken from the dream.

newhere: I have found striking similarities in the Chinese zodiac. I do not believe in astrology, but wonder why these similarities exist and if there is anything real to them?

GF: What is True is True anywhere, everywhere, and across Time.

jill: If I hang on to a relationship that I know is not good for me, is it because I am somehow getting a sense of self through that relationship?

GF: Why else would one cling to what compromises the good in life?

fse: Do you feel that truth is a universal?

GF: If you mean one and whole for everyone everywhere, then "yes."

Lara: I have to let go of some big attachments. I'm much better at not buying into thought. My life is more peaceful and quiet, however there is another feeling of emptiness. Is this just another something to let go of or is it an actual stage?

GF: Learn to watch everything, and a kind of natural letting go handles whatever may be "sticky" in the mind. In the end, all falls out of one's hands because one learns there is no one there (as imagined) needed to hold onto to anything (imagined). Stay watchful.

Lenny: I expected that once I finally found the ideal partner that temptations of infidelity would cease (I know it was naive). Can you give me some encouragement that this can be resolved through self-awakening, or better yet, a specific insight for me?

GF: Our problems originate in the "dark" of us, the unseen aspects that assert themselves over us to fill their desires. These parts cannot be controlled, or at least not for long. What is required is their transformation. Self-knowledge through self-awareness brings truth to bear upon these features. This relationship doesn't resolve the problem, it ends it.

Serafìn: Children don't seem to be based in knowledge in order to learn, at least at the beginning of life. Amazement and high perception seem to be the learning factors. The problem with us is that we are full of habits, bad habits, mental and physical. We fall into sleep and get negative. How to break certain mental and physical habits seems to be my problem. I usually fall into them. Even knowledge of all kinds can become a habit. I want to live fully

GF: Well said, but as with the above answer, let us learn that resistance to a problem only distances us from it by directing our attention and awareness away from the unseen. It is into the unseen we must see to be free.

sayaloud: What is the root of compulsive, impulsive, and obsessive behaviors?

GF: The wish to escape the emptiness that is born of desire.

GF: I wish to give you the remaining notes on Higher Self-Correction that I promised to post before we sign off.

No one can be free who refuses to see what actually lives within him or her. And as we proved in the opening remarks of our chat tonight, authentic self-healing must begin with Truthful self-seeing. There is no other order, no other way. If we will only consider the following facts, the rest of our discoveries become as easy as they are delightful.

Consciousness of any unwanted condition in us must precede its correction, just as the rising sun dismisses any of our fears imagined hidden in the darkness of night. This is why we must learn that anything in us that does not want us to see the truth about our actual unenlightened condition is itself a part of what is punishing us. We can learn to do much better!

"The medicine is bitter, but it heals," said the late great author Vernon Howard, when it comes to seeing the truth of our lives. If we would heal the hidden hurt in us, then we must learn that the initial bitterness of discovering the truth about ourselves is actually the front-runner of our ultimate spiritual victory over what has been defeating us.

Our work is to concede to the bright prescription of Higher Self-Honesty regardless of how it "tastes" to us in those unwanted moments of seeing that we are nothing like the pleasing images we hold of ourselves. Here now are five eye-opening facts about areas in our lives where, if we would be free, we must choose to see what we have thus far refused to see!

1. We close our eyes to the fact that the imaginary value we have placed upon our life only holds up for as long as others don't disturb our dreams. The conscious detection of the fear that follows us around wherever we go is the rejection of this imaginary life with all of its misery. Choose to see and be free.

2. We close our eyes to the fact that wherever we go, and regardless of whom we meet, we still seem to run into the same conflicts and experience the same negativities. Our awareness of this mad mess begins the end of that constant distress that seems to follow us everywhere we go.

3. We close our eyes to the fact that in spite of all of the pain it causes us (and others), we still believe that we know what it means to be a "winner" in life. Unconscious suffering is not just a "loser's" reward; it is his or her just desserts. Learn to be self-correcting, not self-defeated. Self-Victory is assured!

4. We close our eyes to the fact that just because we have mastered hiding some character fault of ours doesn't mean that it has stopped hurting those around us who cannot avoid being subjected to it. Our awareness of our inner aching is the front-runner to a new kind of freedom that comes with learning that we no longer have to pretend to be anything!

5. We close our eyes to the fact that crying for ourselves out of self-pity doesn't change one thing about the nature of the self (in us) that is the secret source of all these tears. Only fools feel sorry for themselves, but not before they have been fooled into believing that an uncorrected sorrow has the power to help them escape their sadness! Be self-seeing, not so believing!

For extra swift healing, return often to study these friendly guides with the intention of welcoming their light. Remember that whenever we see something in us needful of correction, this sudden "vision" of some interior division in us is a secret invitation to be healed by Wholeness Itself.

Our work in these moments is not to condemn ourselves, or otherwise fear or find fault with what we have been shown. Blaming others or ourselves for our suffering is always an act of self-deception that immediately negates the possibility of our freedom. Our sole task is to see ourselves through the eyes of Truth and then leave Truth to take care of the rest.

Our time has run out. Remember that any time you see something in yourself that seems dark, the answer you must give to it is not to fall into darkness over what you have seen. Choose the Higher Path. The Light never shows us anything in ourselves that it hasn't already started to change for us -- if we will only let It! Do persist with your inner work. And now, Good night.

GF: Welcome to our chat tonight. Before we get going I would like to look at a certain psychological condition common to all seekers of Truth -- a pervasive and often punishing inner state we must either learn to use or end up being abused by it. I am speaking about being discontent -- its true nature, its purpose in existence, and our almost daily relationship with its onset in us.

It is no stretch of the imagination to say that many days most people wrestle with some form of discontentment about their lot in life. Add to this an equal if not greater amount of time spent searching for the solution they think will "cure" this confliction, and it might surprise us how pervasive runs this human pastime of trying to dodge these feelings of being discontent.

Let's look at a short list of suspects most commonly believed to be the stealers of our comfort. This will prove itself a helpful study. Serious students of the Higher Life should spend time observing their own discontented states because only the Light of conscious awareness can effectively change the unconscious cause of these unwanted patterns. One other point: Keep in mind during this review that the usual sorts of discontentment we experience in life, the various unwelcome visitors that conflict the mind while they sour the heart, are like a string of bees lining up to enter a hive one at a time. They cannot enter any other way. This knowledge will prove valuable for us as we learn about these stinging states.

But one should also know that it is possible for one's soul to be so habitually hardened by consistent resentment toward life -- for what he sees as its continual denial of his happiness -- that this same soul can become permanently displeased, chronically negative to the point of complete corruption. This destructive state leads to the soul's deconstruction.

Before we dive into our list of what are easily recognized as being common sources of daily discontentment, there is one last insight worth our consideration: Discontentment always makes perfect sense to the discontented! And again, later on in our study we will see exactly why this dark dynamic holds true, and us with it, in its web of deceit!

Depending on the day that breaks for us, we can experience any or all of these ten discontented conditions. Number one on our list strikes us when we first open our eyelids in the morning! Who wants to get out of a warm bed and face a cold world? The rest of this list is presented in no particular order, and is intended only to help illustrate the opening point of this study.

We often feel discontent over: (2) our assessment of our health or our level of available energy, (3) our inescapable responsibility to provide for ourselves or significant others, or (4) our physical appearance (being buff enough!). Other areas where we often feel discontent include: (5) our relationship with those at home or at work, and how others treat us there, (6) our own habitual behaviors beyond our strength to stop, (7) our possessions, or lack of them, (8) our inability to change or otherwise control someone near to us, (9) our uneventful past or unpromising future, or (10) our relationship with our God.

Apart from its detail, the overall purpose of this list is to help us see that much of our time we are engrossed in a struggle to identify the cause of our own discontented condition, followed by our subsequent efforts to change what is unwanted by us into what we believe will better suit our pleasure.

Of course this description puts a kind of "positive spin" on what amounts to one's never-ending whirl of wishes. But these hopes and dreams (of a more contented time to come) do not really belong to what we might think of as being our true Self. They are the incessant creation of one's own thought nature -- that ever-seeking, never-quite-satisfied self we all know too well!

This level of "self" knows only the kind of comfort that it imagines into being. And this, its imagined creation, is a construct created from the content of its own past experience. Knowledge of this psychological fact helps to free us from its influence over us. Here is one of the reasons why truth sets us free: This insight grants us the initial awareness of an unseen contradiction in the workings of our own consciousness. Can you see it yet? If this thought nature of ours, the "self" from which we presently live, possessed the contentment it imagines into being, then it would not have to spend all of its time conjuring up all of the comforting ideas it endlessly creates!

A closer look at this idea reveals there dwells a "self" within us that is always seeking to exchange what we are in the moment for its more idealized conception of what it imagines will make us happier. This malcontent nature is inseparable from the discontentment that it breeds as it drags us through its comparison of what "is" to its own imagined idealized state yet to be realized.

The truth is, this self is not just driven along by its discontent but, in fact, has no independent existence apart from it. It requires that something always be "wrong" in order for it to set things "right." In other words, the contentment this self seeks only exists for as long as does its sense of being discontent. And there is still more for us to see.

The lifespan of this discontented nature is the length of time it takes to hand you over to its opposite: the imagined pleasure that awaits you when you arrive at your imagined destination. But, as we know it to be true, we no sooner arrive at this chosen port of pleasure than appears again what is "not right" with where we are, and the cycle of discontentment starts again!

Once we awaken enough to see this cycle of discontentment for what it is, then we stand a chance of canceling it and the strain of living with what has always been an impossible contradiction in our consciousness: the vain hope that our discontentment can be answered by the very nature that creates and sustains it. Clearly a whole new order of solution is required.

At the close of our chat tonight we will look at the possibility of such a New Solution and what will be required of us to enact it. At the same time we will discuss a few other insights as they concern canceling this unconscious cycle of discontentment.

Now, let's begin with your questions and comments, but please work to remember that our task here on-line together is to address what is real and what leads us to authentic self-transformation. Let's talk over the issues you are working upon within yourself, which means let's not spend our time wandering through frivolous philosophical questions or otherwise imaginary religious ideas. What would you like to talk about tonight? Let's see what we can learn together.

Bev: So, if I am to be "content in whatsoever state I am in," then how do I know what decisions are right ones? In other words, aren't there some situations, relationships, etc. that are "better" for us than others, and how do we know which ones they are if we are working to be content with everything?

GF: You have missed the point. It isn't that one works to be content with everything. You might as well be a zucchini in a garden. What the opening essay points out is that there is in us a nature that knows only one kind of contentment at present that is the secret opposite of its own discontented findings with life in the moment. Real Contentment is the end of the influence of this nature that lives from the opposites.

Bev: I did understand the point, and I do some days feel like a zucchini. However, my question was more specifically: understanding that this discontented self exists, HOW then do we discern what situations are "right" ones for us and what ones we are discontent about for our own inner reasons?

GF: There is no such thing as knowing what you want to know in the way you want to. Try to see that whatever we mix fear into must make that mixture something we are discontent with BEFORE we even get started. Act as truly as you know how, with the best intention you have, and watch. The “cake” that is baked tells you the truth of its ingredients.

mabaowa: How in the world do you know when it is God working in your life and not that self? After beginning my study of truth I received a dream job and met and married a fine gentleman, or so I thought. I lost them both and they both used me in every way, shape, form, and fashion. I took so much because I was so certain that they were God-sent. How do you know when its God? Right now I am alone and don't want to re-enter the world.

GF: One of the most difficult things for us to do, but that we must if we would have a God-centered life, is realize that it is not God that sends psychopaths into our lives, but rather there is in us an unenlightened nature that cannot tell the difference as yet between what is healing or hurtful, between what will serve us and what will steal from us. Do not hide out. If you do, it is fear that constrains you and that will ultimately betray you by recreating the same pains again.

jill: I have noticed in my studies that I can spot phony people much sooner than I used to. Sometimes it only takes a couple times of talking to them. So if it helps anyone… keep working on yourself and you will learn how to detect psychos.

GF: Yes, this is a benefit to our genuine self-work. The more we learn to see through our selves, the more easily we discern the false faces of others.

Bev: The more I see about how discontented I really am -- about everything -- the more the "voices" and the "committee" seem to scream about the things that are wrong. How do you keep the work of seeing how discontent we are separate from our becoming completely discontent about this sorry state?

GF: I spoke of this very thing last night in a talk about discouragement. If we really see our discontentment, and understand its cause, this understanding actually helps keep us from becoming wrongly interested in our own conflicted state. Don't look for shortcuts. Do not hope for the end of an ache. Let what is be what is, with your part being only its witnessing. This Light will change the contents in it versus content creating imagined light to save itself.

mast: I find that I can be more aware when I am alone or going for long walks, but I find witnessing very hard when I try to bring it in everyday problems of life. Could you give some ways to increase it in daily life?

GF: Yes. You must have the intention to keep your attention with you at all times wherever you go. This takes consistent, persistent effort. Take an hour for the purpose of just watching yourself under circumstances you usually go to sleep to yourself under, i.e., go to a mall -- not to shop, but to see. Go to a movie -- not to lose yourself, but to watch yourself. Find your own ways to put Truth before your habitual mental and emotional activity.

rousseau: You mentioned a "purpose" for discontentment. Could you share with me the purpose, so that I may react properly to my own daily feelings of discontentment?

GF: Discontentment in our lives serves the purpose of awakening us in the moment of its appearance to one of two things: First, that we are most likely serving some false purpose that even when completed leaves us discontent. Second, that there is a natural end to certain lines of thoughts and feelings and that discontentment is the herald of those moments in which we have completed the course available to us through those same limited thoughts and feelings.

Rael: A discontentment that has dogged me for thirty years is health. I injured my body at that time, and the pain has increased with the years until now it is debilitating. When the pain or fatigue increases, it is disheartening and hard to be content, let alone have energy for awareness. The pain and tension of injury seem to resonate with that of self-deceit.

GF: I hope this will help: I know such pain personally. I also can encourage you to find "the center" of this pain in you the next time it washes over you. Much of our valuable and necessary energy, including what is needed for the healing process, is literally wasted in unconscious resistance to our pain. Don't resist the pain. This can be done. Separate from the sufferer, not the suffering.

Janet: I take painkillers for pain. There are ways of controlling how we feel.

GF: We must, as challenging as it may seem at the outset, see the difference between "controlling" how we feel and the fact that these choices are being made for us by something within us that has taken control of us. The world we live in cannot wait to sell us whatever the next thing is to help us sublimate whatever suffering we are in. This sublimation is ultimately self-compromising and destructive. There is a way out. Seek it through Truth.

Rael: I see that I devote my questions to you trying to express my "frustration" at not being to attain any meaningful inner change. I also see that you cannot solve this frustration by an answer, yet I myself still see no answer.

GF: Believe it or not, this state you have reported is a mandatory condition along the Path. One must see beyond the shadow of a doubt that the answers the mind seeks are not the Answer needed. This doesn't mean such answers don't supply connections to greater understanding, only that this higher understanding is not a feature of thought. Stay the course. Stay close.

sassypat: My discontent seems to come on a moment to moment basis. This evening, Wheel of Fortune was replaced by a movie. I didn’t get into the Chat room right away, and my grandson has obviously set my computer to print in red and he is not home to change it. One part of me laughs at this, but the other is really upset about it.

GF: Our lives are not intended to grow smaller, but do so because we stop risking what it takes to grow and learn what keeps us “loose” and naturally responsive. As we contract, it takes lesser and lesser things to make bigger and bigger ripples in the “self.”

mabaowa: How do you find real contentment? What does it feel like? What does it take? How often does it come?

GF: I'll tell you something beautiful: Real Contentment is a Visitor. It is a silent friend that enters the house prepared for its presence. It cannot be bought or timed or in any other way made to come to one. It follows Love. It waits for Love. And it comes without fail when one loves Truth/God more than one wants their present self and its circle of endless wants.

mast: You have said that all the disturbing thoughts of the past which haunt us are just those experiences which are not lived fully, and they come to surface again and again to claim their life. On the other hand you say that we should consciously refuse to go with such thoughts. Is this kind of refusal not suppression? Should we not let those thoughts come to surface and watch them, being a witness?

GF: We must be careful to be clear. It is not the thoughts of our own past that are the seed of experiences not lived fully. What returns to us in our recurring life-events are the reflections of ourselves, of unrealized parts of our own nature that surface to reveal themselves to us through our experience. It isn't a question of refusing thought. That is resistance. It's a question of recognizing relationship between the thought-nature and the world it brings to us.

debo: What can one do to end resistance? Force yourself to do what you know you have to do, or watch and wait for motivation?

GF: The only way resistance can end is when, through one's awareness of its cause, one is able to call upon a Will of a new order that rests outside of the mechanical will inherent in either resisting or being attracted to either one of the opposites in a pair. This New Will is what we are working to realize in this Work. It alone sits outside of whatever opposites presently constitute the captivity of one's consciousness in that moment.

straydog: When we set forth towards a goal that we think will benefit us, resistance pops up. How do we tell when that resistance is to be fought and defeated towards the goal, or the resistance is the Universe trying to tell us that that goal is off the Path?

GF: If you remember the "borgs" in the Star Trek movie, they repeatedly said: "Resistance is futile." When you understand that resistance to the disturbance is the disturbance, at that moment you will not have the same troubles you do now when you encounter "it" (resistance). No resistance exists without unseen opposites, and neither does the blocked self exist without this resistance.

Roy: In the context of "Instant Recovery," and attempting to drop my identification with a painful thought, I find it very difficult to distinguish between actually "dropping the sense of I" and "resisting the painful thought." There also seems to be a fear of loosing control that makes it even more difficult. Can you help with the specifics of the process of dropping this identification?

GF: Dropping the sense of "I" means that one is aware of that "I" and its conflict and the solution this set of opposites proffers, all at the same time. This in turn means that dropping our identification with a state means that it becomes something conscious to the "observing I" instead of the common "I" having its sense of self defined by that negative state.

Roy: So then, is the "I" doing the resisting of my painful thought defined by the painful or negative state itself? And if I see myself resisting this condition, then does it mean I am already identified with it and have lost the "observing I"?

GF: Any part of us that resists any other part is the secret opposite of the part resisted. One can see this resistance in motion, without identifying with its pain, even though the pain remains. Then that would be self-observation.

jaybird: Can you offer some clear guidelines on how to detect the connections between our unconscious inner thought patterns and our outward circumstances?

GF: Very much so. As a general exercise, and one I highly recommend, practice coming awake as often as possible and notice the relationship between what you are connected to interiorly and what your exterior experience is in that moment. Such an exercise will yield great insights for you.

jaybird: More and more, I am seeing clearly the way I walk in circles (psychologically, mentally and spiritually speaking) and end up in the same situations again and again. I know it's good to "see" this, but sense that just seeing isn't enough. What more must I do to break the mental chains?

GF: We have in us, unawakened, and yet so only as a potentiality, a certain aspect of our True Self. This quality or characteristic as it comes to the forefront of one's waking hours has in it something that I call "Spiritual Intolerance." This means that we have in us something that once it becomes conscious of what compromises us, it becomes intolerant of that state for us. Work harder to see more.

mabaowa: I have been living that cycle for the past several months. It is like watching myself in a movie and I can't stop the fruitless behavior or move on.

GF: Nevertheless, one must do what is in one's power, and if that means for the time being that all you can do is watch your own appetites drive you from pillar to post and then punish you for the journey they drove you to take, then so be it. Watch this. Don't excuse yourself. Don't blame others. Be ruthlessly honest. Do that and you will see a gradual ability to suffer this discontented nature out of existence.

Deepa: Does celibacy have anything to do with spirituality?

GF: It's not a clear-cut answer that can be given because everything depends upon the type of individual asking it and their present psycho-emotional state of being. There can be immense benefit in a celibate life, just as there can be havoc wreaked upon a person not prepared for the rigors of such a discipline.

Eric: Let's say that one day I make great progress because I work really hard on myself to see what I'm really like, but the next day I fall completely asleep. My question is, does my falling asleep cause me to lose whatever progress that I made on that first day, or do the Real gains that "I" make stay with me forever?

GF: Any real gain made by a sincere aspirant constitutes something having been "fixed" in his essence in such a way that the constituent parts have not the power to undo. This isn't to say that one can't lose what one has gained up until a certain point on the Path. For instance, outbursts of dark negative thoughts and feelings are highly disruptive and destructive to one's effort.

puppie: I have been dealing with a feeling that I do not belong in any human family since my divorce and because my biological family does not communicate with me. I find my discontentment comes from feeling like I do not belong with people and that the ones I love do not even seem to like me. Is it wrong to long for human connection and want more supportive intimate connection?

GF: Being alone is not a “curse.” If you are alone because your developing nature naturally repels others who, in their love of low things, do not want your company, then good riddance to them. If you are alone because you are unpleasant to be with, then thank these people for being a “mirror” for you. Only you can know the truth of yourself.

BarryF: If we're always looking into a “mirror," and what we see is unpleasant, how does a change in what we see come about? I desperately want what I see to change! But it seems the more I endeavor to do my inner work, what I see doesn't change and/or gets even more dissatisfying.

GF: You're on the right track. Listen to this Truth: Don't try to change what you see in the "mirror." The self that wants to change what it sees ensures that it will continue seeing what needs changing. Our task is to welcome the Light and stand in its circle. It's the Light's job to handle the rest. Let the Light fight for you.

JayW: Lately I have been awakened to the Fact that this is God's World and that it is to my benefit to abandon my limited view for a more expanded view. When I am seeing Life as God's Life there is nothing that doesn't fit, and there is tremendous Peace. My limited ego view creates instant separation and suffering.

GF: No one can really let go until one sees he holds onto nothing real. Then there is the chance of ending the separation that self lives for and upon.

ADB: I'd like to think I've been (daily) doing the Work for over two years now and have made strides in many internal areas. What is coming up though now is that my spouse (negatively) views me as being "passive." Can a person be doing the Work and be non-reactive/explosive and appear "passive" to others? Any insights on this and addressing this with my wife?

GF: This is a fine line that one walks. There is a danger of one becoming apathetic through the wrong kind of withdrawal from their own negativity through an unseen resistance and hence fear of its expression. Pseudo-spiritual people walk around in this bland, passive, self-induced and imagined state of surrender. Real Work inwardly does create a certain kind of passivity to what formerly punished us, but even in this we are still highly alert and active. Hope this helps.

JayW: I am experiencing much confusion in a strange sort of way. I hear/read your work and it makes so much sense. Then I encounter another teaching that seems to not have the same foundation that you and VH and others have -- but these also make sense. Can you offer any guidelines on discernment?

GF: The best I can tell you for now is that one danger of the Path is the same as one of its benefits, and that is, namely, that Truth is fairly easily found in small portions and "golden" threads that run through many works of individuals at all levels of development. True discernment is gained only through "taste," and "taste" is experiential. We have in us a light that knows Light without fail. Our task is to awaken this light so that it may lead us through what parts of us now see as light, but is darkness.

mast: What is the connection between vegetarian diet and spirituality?

GF: There is no necessary connection between these two things. Again, everything depends upon type and the hopefully developing sensitivity of the individual as he goes through the prerequisite stages of his development. Having said this, dense or gross foods do tend to disturb the body and activate the mind beyond its need.

intuit33: Can one cancel karma by being aware? It seems I'm so stuck in the financial arena.

GF: Our mind, the way it presently works with its limited light, tends to see things like the idea of karma as being a separate and almost distinct issue from the content of our present and active consciousness. In truth, no such distinction exists. This Work does two things: First, it cancels the self that continues to create conditions that recur because one hasn't learned from them, and second, it doesn't change our past -- it releases us from it.

RobF: You have mentioned that certain life situations may force us to our knees in prayer to God. Would this result from intense suffering that one is undergoing? Or does this refer to a realization on our part that we cannot die to our thought nature no matter how hard we try?

GF: One day you will see that both of these things that you have said are as one and that may be what brings you to this True supplication to the Celestial.

hawkeye: I am having a difficult time getting started with the task of re-entering the job market. There is a fear that I can't seem to shake in making the first move. Is there any insight that might help?

GF: Yes, by all means. There is no such moment in the situation you have referred to that is the right moment to wait for. Leap! Jump! Act! Dare! Strive! Risk it! Don't worry over what might happen -- that's a recipe to insure nothing happens. Take action and watch for results. Let the results refine your next action, then start again. Keep Truth near you. You can't lose.

buddy: I was just reading about the differences between the left (primarily verbal/thought based), and right sides of the brain. This false, thought-based self that you talk about, could it possibly be located in the left brain, or could it be a function of the left brain?

GF: The false nature is not a creation of either left or right lobes of the brain. It is a creation of the opposites at work in the essential nature of the way thought knows itself only through considering an image created from its own content. The thought-self is endlessly separating itself in order to know what it sees -- the catch being of course that it can't ever "know" what it has separated itself from.

Janet: Communication is so important. Good communication is sometimes so difficult to keep up with in all types of relationships as different people are on different "wavelengths" and not everyone thinks alike.

GF: Yes, of course, that's true. One of the special benefits of this Work is that as we awaken a bit, we realize that we ourselves carry the complete wavelength in each of us and, therefore, in knowledge of this and in its experience we are capable of relating to virtually anyone around us. Good communication begins with Right Relationship.

Janet: People can change. I've known so many who have changed over the years... how about counting your blessings?

GF: Yes, people can change, but I will tell you a Truth that one day you will have to see for yourself: Real self-change, Real transformation in a person is more rare than the rarest flower found on this planet. People pretend to change and then suck needful believers into their vortex of viciousness. And talk about counting your blessings, knowing the Truth of these ideas will bring you Eternal Gratitude.

ADB: Any advice for a person "addicted" to various modes of visual stimulation? I know I get a sense of self from this, but this "need" does come from a place with powerful urges.

GF: Watch closely (as closely as you can) your own emotions while you watch what you are addicted to. If you will give at least half of your energy to this special attention in these moments, you will start to "see" within you a pain that has been hidden from you that is the secret source of this pleasure you are now driven to seek. I know what I tell you here. Work.

ADB Is this hidden pain only one that I have or is it common to all? If mine only, does it matter that I spend great time delving into discovering it's origin and how else it impacts my life?

GF: This pain is no one’s exclusive property. It is the hidden opposite to the desire that we hate ourselves for having. It is the lust for this or that – a pain which cannot be answered, only unconsciously served until seen through and dropped.

jill: So a pain within us seeks a pleasure to help relieve it from the pain, although we don't realize we are doing this? And the relief is only temporary?

GF: Exactly. Doesn’t our own experience prove this very thing? See it!

cary: On page 236 of the Seeker's Guide to Self-Freedom, your answer to the second question was that we must let go of the wish to return to a moment glimpsed. Does this mean we can't remember either? It's comforting to do so.

GF: Yes, it means that we must realize the difference between the part of us that can only know what something was of a special nature by thinking back over it. The true Spiritual Life and the Grace that comes from our deepening relationship with God's Life is not only not repeatable, but it is undesirable once one understands that spiritual gifts are like water from a fountain once we stand in the right place.

steveb: Do you have an opinion you would share about the benefits and drawbacks of an AA type "12-step program"?

GF: We are each (if we're lucky) drawn to some level of help that rests just above whatever is presently compromising or otherwise limiting us. In the end, we must recognize that a program of any kind is inherently limited if we think that the possibilities available to us are outlined in known steps. It is our individual willingness to explore the truth of ourselves that releases the promise of ourselves. Let each of us start where we must.

needhelp: What is the "luck" you speak of in your last response?

GF: Like attracts like, and if one has a measure of Light within him, this Light will (at some point) be drawn to a source greater than its present capacity for expression.

Garosh: Are there limits to the "amount" of wisdom that a person can attain?

GF: There is absolutely no limit. Keep in mind this doesn't mean knowledge, but Wisdom. And what is Wisdom but Wholeness?

straydog: It is said that we are where we are to learn certain lessons before we move on. Are there certain things we can do to help find the Lessons within our current circumstance?

GF: You can't avoid the lessons in your circumstances. That's the problem. So many of us are always looking for what we think we need that we fail to see that this seeking self is what needs be seen and dropped. Then the lessons are like raindrops that soften the hardened soil of one's soul.

needhelp: Your last answer strikes a certain chord… it brings something up to the surface just enough to confuse me more. Please explain!

GF: The solution to our suffering, our discontentment, cannot be found outside of the self that experiences life through its resistance to it. The purpose of experience is to bring us to the end of needing it to define us.

Janet: I have been grieving for the loss of several close relatives. How does one stop grieving?

GF: If you're sincere with your question, notice who is at the center of this continuing grief. If you're honest, you will see there is a very strong sense of "I" in your crying. Note that it is not wrong to grieve for loved ones lost; this is natural. But grief, like dark clouds, is intended to pass in a given time so that the Light may once again begin the process of healing and nurturing the world it shines upon.

danielaw: Grieving is accepting and allowing the detachment to take place. I suppose after the lesson "love", the lesson "letting go" is the second hardest… allowing oneself to be with the grief until it has done its job.

GF: It is true that everything has its time, its season for coming and going, but we mustn't mistake the necessary seasonal changes our Soul is required to go through for the secret self-love that the false self loves to continue writing on the wall of what it calls its experience.

needhelp: Besides studying reality, I have an aching feeling that everything I do is futile. I don't know what to do with myself. For instance, if I am home, bored, and there's nothing on the TV, VH says to let these feelings overwhelm me, so then I feel that anything I go and do is wrong. I am confused.

GF: Mr. Howard never said let any feeling overwhelm us. Try to see the difference between being absorbed in a negative state and being fully aware of its punishing presence. In the latter state one suffers consciously the condition, and in the former state there is no self separate from the conflict and its ache. Stick with it. Ask God to show you what you need to see. Mean it. Answers come.

Rael: When I read esoteric literature, it is like looking into a mirror and I am, at that moment, able to use some kind of reflected light to see more clearly the dynamics of what is going on within. Yet when I turn again to the world, I can still observe the problems, but the answer eludes me. I enjoy reading those books, but wonder if I am missing something.

GF: You wouldn't read a book on how to master something like cooking and then never go into the kitchen! The only purpose, Real Purpose, of Truthful writings is to pass along principles for individuals to apply in their day-to-day lives. Without application, there is no experience. And without experience, there is no purification. And without purification, no elevation. See this and go to work.

ADB: Can you tell me if Krishnamurti and Maurice Nicoll were influential in your learning? And if so, how? I wonder if I could gain anything from delving into their works.

GF: I can unreservedly tell you that both of these men in their own way were great Lights in this darkened world of ours.

mast: Not only when I meditate, but also during moments of quietness, I hear a soft sound like that of distant waterfall. Sometimes it scares me and my mind becomes afraid to sit for more time. Kindly comment.

GF: Do not fear this. Sit through it. Open yourself up to it. This is a natural phenomenon.

jaybird: How might a person on the inner path "rejuvenate" when feeling "fatigued" and lacking the motivation to do the inner work that must be done?

GF: Clearly the answer cannot be to trust apathy to become a forward movement. Work through these naturally alternating stages. Start over each day with the wish for willingness. Back this wish up with some form of study -- be it book reading, tape listening, contemplation or mediation.

buddy: I am 27 years old, and still don't know "what I'm going to do with my life," though I do dabble in the arts, mostly music, and have over the years built up a bundle of lyrics (in rap/rhyme form) that all have to do with truth/breaking down mental and spiritual walls/searching for God, etc. I have been thinking that it might help people, especially adolescents and young adults, to hear positive rap out there, as there is so much negativity in rap and in popular music

GF: Sometimes one’s way is not clear… best to wait for guidance than blindly guide oneself, but do maintain yourself by some kind of work. Don’t fall into the trap of being content with hating what you don’t have (yet).

Dennis: When we die to our self and the suffering ends and we are at peace and in tune with all of life, what do we use to know ourselves when all the things we used before no longer serve their purpose? Does true choice no longer exist when we become one with creation?

GF: A winter insect knows nothing about the summer, so goes the old saying. Do the work needed to know the answers to these questions, as any other answer (I offer) will only give rise to more questions to choose from!

tomspeak: If I focus on any given task, sometimes I "lose myself" in it. Time becomes insignificant. You know the rest. Is the lesson not to get "lost in the moment"? Am I supposed to be paying attention to the doer or the doing? I remember reading somewhere to "watch the watcher."

GF: Learn to take natural “come back to yourself” breaks from this natural loss of your awareness to an engrossing task.

rlk: Is it best to stay away from people who choose the darkness over the light, even if they are family members? I can feel the darkness all around me when they enter the room.

GF: In a word: yes. But not before you have done what is in your power to show these others what they are doing to themselves. Be kind, but never enabling.

Diojeneez: "In whatever you do, remember your last days, and you will never sin." This comes from the book of Sirach. But, if this is true, why did Jesus die for our sins? Can't only the perfect be sinless?

GF: Jesus did not die for our “sins.” This whole idea is a misrepresentation of His Life created by those who must have others to judge in order for them to sit in judgment. Let perfection speak for itself. Any other answer is imperfect.

JayW: It's almost been one year since 9/11. Have you had further thoughts on this and how we can use the shock for our spiritual maturing?

GF: We must recognize the hand of death in the compulsive re-visitation of the past, and then dare to die to this part of us that needs what was in order to be.

danielaw: I just recently discovered your radically truthful messages, and "bravo" you on them… sometimes maybe too wordy to hit right away yet powerful when they talk to you without detours. Was it your free will that chose to go this path, or do you feel you had no real choice than to allow to let something higher come through you?

GF: My interest began at a very young age, so I can’t speak to this question.

Sjxi: Your books have been a blessing for me. Thank you! As I continue my inner exploration, perfectionism is a major issue.

GF: We must realize that anything we feel compelled to do cannot lead to freedom from this compulsion. Do “struggle” with your natural wish not to mindlessly serve the self (in you) that serves what punishes you. This right effort will bring you realizations that will release you.

kevinB: How is the list of names and states coming along? I am from South Jersey near Philadelphia and would like to connect with others nearby. Thanks for this great work.

GF: I believe this list is available for Tape Club members to help facilitate student interaction. Please e-mail Chris through our Homepage for details.

buddy: Recently, I've discovered that I seem (maybe) to be choosing sarcasm/anger/boredom over depression. I'm not sure if I'm correct on this. Since high school I've always had "problems with depression," (the parents and doctors said it's probably genetic), and still visit this state sometimes, but recently it occurred to me, while bored or ticked off or being obnoxious as all get-out, that these states might be a replacement for the tired old "depression." Does this sound possible?

GF: Yes, sublimation is a form of resistance, and what is pushed down or away can easily “pop” up in a variation of the theme. If you haven’t heard the tapes, get a copy of “Secrets of Cleansing Heart, Mind, and Soul. These talks will help you through this stage. As always, if the tapes are not helpful, just return them to the Foundation for a full refund, no questions asked. You can order on-line from the Foundation’s web site.

mabaowa: What is most interesting to me is that people want my help, go through extremes to obtain my information. But they don't want to give me the positions and in relationships the respect. But they want my insight. I am tired of trying and truly want to develop my ideas and work from home -- limiting contact and hurt.

GF: We must never limit contact (with others) for fear of being hurt, because if we do, then we stay at home with fear itself – and what could be more hurtful , or disrespectful to ourselves than that!

IGETIT: I was wondering… have you ever heard of NEO-TECH? And if so, do you have any comments? I will really appreciate your comments.

GF: I have no idea about this. Be careful.

lady42: Is it possible that the trying, striving, and the "work" to wake up could just be another obstacle to the surrender needed to wake up to some higher level of awareness?

GF: Of course it can be, just as any image is never the thing itself.

needhelp: It seems the five minute break with the chathost, advertising and asking for donations is contradictory to your teachings. Please explain!

GF: There is no contradiction and I won’t “explain.” If you think there is a way to host-free chats, keep a content-laden website with free Key Lessons up and running, produce and sell helpful products at minimal costs, and do all this (and more) without “raising” money in some way, come here and -- as an unpaid volunteer (as everyone here is) -- help us find the way to do it. We will welcome your energy.

jill: I have noticed that when I get involved with certain people, they are energy zappers, and my body seems to have this intuition that tells me these people are wrong for me by giving me a sick feeling. Even before I know the people I know they are wrong for me. What is this? I have learned through my spiritual work to trust this intuition, but it also confuses me.

GF: Follow this intuition. It confuses you only because to heed it means you will have to let go of some people you are identified with.

DebbieE: Recently I have noticed that responding to friends and their troubles is not as easy as it seemed before. I have trouble even coming up with something to say to them. I have to reread any letter I write, and when I go back the next day to read it again before sending it, I want to change it again. Can you suggest why this might be happening? My guess is I think most of what I have been thinking and saying for years is coming from something I no longer want to live.

GF: I couldn’t have said it any better! Good for you.

daffey: Could you explain how to listen more attentively to the voice within that is, in retrospect, usually right (and we discover that fact after having not listened)?

GF: Practice going “silent” as often as possible. There is a certain “Quiet” in us that knows when to act, and what to act upon – all without taking thought.

DaveB: Could you explain further the difference between knowledge and wisdom?

GF: Wisdom may express itself in thought while knowledge dwells only in the realm of thought.

FSE: Thanks for all your insights... if fear constrains and recreates the pain, how does one face the fear that may lead to the consequence of a more painful situation?

GF: See how negative imagination creates this conflict and then drop it. With the end of this imagined pain comes the end of the imagined consequences thought to bring it about.

t.l.: I get the feeling that every time I live outwardly, it's just the phony personality. I know enough to observe myself, but then I get another feeling that I shouldn't say anything if I know it's just the lower nature. Is the trick just to stick with self-observation?

GF: If we could learn to just watch ourselves without talking to ourselves about what we see, our inner progress would take the “fast track”.

MikeS: Sometimes when I meditate I start to feel huge, and it frightens me to stay there. I usually end up, out of fear, looking around and making sure I'm still "safe." Can you shed some light on this for me? I tend to stay away from meditation for periods of time as a result of this.

GF: These sensations are the result of certain energies moving through the brain. Fear not! Keep your wish for God’s Life before you and let go.

joekidd: I have what seems to be an "anti establishment" attitude. I see the common folly in almost everyone I meet through this understanding, but I need to see where I go wrong or take it too far, if I am at all. Please comment. I need to keep a job and function in real life and am afraid I will not be able to.

GF: All “anti” this or that parts of us are secretly just certain negative states that must have something to “hate” in order for that separative self to survive intact. Go to work. Don’t compromise your beliefs, but don’t let any part of you be a bully either.

tomspeak: Do we keep coming back until we get it right? I want out of this chaos. I want out of the self that wants out of this chaos. I want to see through this facade that I've created for myself so that I can see that there is no self. It seems to be unfolding gradually. I wonder one day if suddenly something grand will inhabit my life, a sudden burst of understanding or something. Does the unawakened keep coming back until Understanding happens?

GF: Our conscious persistence purifies us through conscious experience. Enlightenment is never-ending. What does get resolved is our resistance to the cost!

joekidd: I am having what seems to be serious resistance to diplomatic suggestions of these true ways of seeing that lead to real understanding from somebody I love, and it involves children. I may have to walk away after hoping and waiting for a very long time. How can I do this the best way for everyone?

GF: Such partings of the way are never easy, and you will have to walk this walk alone. One thing: set an aim not to act out any cruelty, nor give way to blame for anything. Remember: everyone is in pain, including yourself, so don’t add to this by pretending anything to anyone, including yourself.

mg: In "Waking Up Together" you state that we do not exist except in relationship, and yet we also understand that we are complete unto ourselves – it is already here in us if we awaken to it. I'm having trouble reconciling these ideas. The "crisis" comes from a desire to be in a relationship that is pure joy (for both of us) when we are together, but he doesn't make an effort to be together (which makes me feel sad/unworthy). This has led me to the understanding that the higher lesson in this pain is that I do not need another person with me, that I am "complete" without someone there (I think), and yet, we exist through relationship. Any light shed on my floundering would be greatly appreciated!

GF: What I said is that relationship comprises our existence – be it with whatever level of energies (and their forms) comprise this relationship in us. And that is the key here. Our (sense of) self is determined by what we are in relationship with in the moment, and it doesn’t matter if this relationship is with someone, or our thoughts about that someone when not with him, OR the relationship we have with a mind free of having to think about someone to lend us that sense of self. Not all relationships are visible.

GF: I need to send along my remaining notes regarding the spiritual solution for canceling out the dark effects of our discontented nature.

We can summarize our opening notes with a simple question that deserves our attention: Who in his or her right mind believes -- even for a moment -- that the path to one's lasting contentment would be paved by continually thinking about everything seen as missing from one's life? Such a path may promise pleasure to come, but its steps are spiked with discontentment. This finding proves our solution:

We have been the unwitting servants of a thought nature whose appetite is unappeasable because its life is fueled by opposites that cannot cancel each other anymore than picking up a sword can kill the fear in us that creates those whom we hate. This false self spends our life seeking relief from its own painful misperception of reality.

The clearer grows our understanding of our present condition, the more certain we become about what must be done: We must terminate our unconscious agreement with this unenlightened nature and, in doing so, consciously let go of our all-too-familiar sense of self that has been lent to us for our service to this false nature. How is this to be done?

Here is the True Solution to this pressing sense of discontentment and the self responsible for it: We must cease struggling to acquire more of those things in life that have already proven themselves powerless to please us. Instead we must do the inner work of deliberately detaching ourselves from this familiar sense of self that promises us comfort even as it continues to sow the seeds of our discontent.

Let me stress here that the work of letting go of one's self in these moments can only be as successful as one's insight into these truths now revealed. Here is why this must be so: We have learned that our principle source of discontented feelings is born in us when our thought self sees what "is not" happening in our lives as opposed to what it imagines "ought to be" taking place.

What we must see is that it is not we who create this constant comparison that is the root of our discontentment. This comparison process is the root of our thought nature that only knows what something is by knowing what it is not -- the opposites at work -- only they have been at work on us, dragging us into ever-deeper stages of feeling discontented with our life.

Enough is enough. We can and must learn to call upon a New "I" within us that understands the futility of continuing to vest ourselves in the "hope of things seen." So that now, instead of perpetually giving ourselves over to these discontented feelings with their promise of a better tomorrow, we are going to give these states away in order to gain possession of ourselves in the Now.

Which brings us to these last important notes: This act of conscious detachment is not an act of denial or resistance to the discontentment we may be feeling. It is a replacing of our attention upon the Truth we know -- a conscious shift of our sense of self away from what troubles it onto our new awareness that this self, along with its troubles and plans for freedom, is a lie.

Lastly, take this one thought with you into your battle to detach yourself from the discontented self: As difficult as it may be to grasp for now, consider the following insight to be true and then set out to prove it to yourself: Our God, the Creator of all things, whatever name you give to this Living Light, Himself created this seemingly unanswerable discontentment in us. Why would Goodness Itself give us such a mysterious gift, one so hard to grasp? Because only through our trials with being discontent could we ever come to see that there is only one True Source of Perfect Contentment: our life in God's. To this Perfect Plan add one last idea:

Only as each of us awakens to our actual condition in life, dominated as we are to one degree or another by a discontented self, can we ever hope to use our free will to give up our willfully discontented self in favor of a New and True Allegiance with what is Peace and Contentment Itself.

The initial knowledge you need to proceed and succeed with severing yourself from the discontented self is in your hands. Use these Truths you have learned to lead a whole new kind of life free from the lashing of a self that only lives for a contentment to come. You can do better than let bitterness over what you don't have become your god. Make the change right now!

Our time has run out. Don't forget to join us next month, Thursday, October third. Until then, remember your intention to detach yourself from any sense of self otherwise derived from its discontented considerations of life. Know that the contentment your heart longs for already dwells in you and only awaits your remembrance of Its Peace. Good night.